I Just Yelled at a Bunch of Kyds/I need to rant!!

I have to rant!! I’m so furious!
I live in a terrible neighborhood that’s in serious decline. It's full of kyds that run in feral packs. A few minutes ago I was looking out of my living room window and noticed a group of about 8 brats ranging in age from about 4-8. One of the girls was holding our neighbor’s cat very akwardly. The cat was fighting like hell to get away from her. Finally, it did and ran under our split rail fence and into our shrubs. Immediately, 4 of the little fuck monkeys climbed my fence, entered my yard, and began tromping through my landscaping looking for the cat. Without thought ,I slipped into mean teacher mode, threw open my front door and yelled at them to get off of my flowers, out of my yard, and to NEVER touch my fence again, because if they broke one of the rails their parunts would be paying for it. (One of our rails was broken last year. We don’t know who did it, but we do know it had to be one of the bastards that live in this frickin’ hole of a neighborhood. ) The one white trash girl told me she was just trying to get her cat. I told her I knew it was the neighbor’s cat , and not to lie to me. Then a hispanic boy told me it was his cat. I told him he was lying and needed to get out of my yard. I made them slide under my fence so they wouldn’t touch it (Tee Hee the ground here is very wet!)
Now when I was a kid, if a mean neighbor lady had yelled at me like I just yelled at them I would have beat feet getting the hell out of there. I’m freaking scary when I’m pissed. These little hump dumplings weren’t at all scared, in fact they waited around 2 or 3 minutes and entered my yard again. This time I stormed out and asked them,” What part of stay out of my yard do you not understand?!?” I asked them where they lived, and of course all of them, but 2, live in the townhouses (subsidized) at the front of our neighborhood. The other two bastards, who looked to be about 4 and 6 live in the apartments across the major highway across from our neighborhood. I told them they needed to go back and play in front of where they live and to never play near my property again.
Why don’t people teach their vaginal runoff to respect people, animals and property? I hope that cat scratches the shit out of them all.
I’m usually am pretty good at keeping my cool, but I’ve had killer PMS this whole week. I’m now waiting for one of their moos to come tell me off, beat me up, or vandelize my car! Sorry to rant sooo long. I’m just so sick of this place! If you don’t see me post by tomorrow it means the welfare twats or the illegals have killed me!!

Put the FEAR in them! Or at least, coat the public side of your fence with a mixture of glue and glass shards, the resultant slicing to ribbons should be enough to keep them away for a couple months at least. In that time, you should invest in the most dirty, nasty, smelly clown or Santa costume you can find. Spend the rest of the summer and fall, or year if you live somewhere warm, dressed in your costume while sitting on your front yard drinking straight from a handle of your favorite hard liquor and whittling headless children out of wood. When they come close, just say "CLOWNEY WANTS A HUUUUUUUG!" while waving your whittling knife drunkenly.

Hell, you know where they live, just dress as a clown and tap on their bedroom windows at night once in a while.

"It truly is the one commonality that every designation of humans you can think of has, there's at least one asshole."
--Me

I have seen split rail fences with an inner lining of wire mesh fence. It was pretty inconspicuous and didn't harm the prettiness of the split rail. Maybe that would keep all species out. It totally sucks to have to be the one to pay for such a thing, though, when it's not your fault at all.

vaginal runoff ...............lol now THATS a good one!!

I think breeders are the worst pet owners, and kids have NO business handling someones pet cat.

I found a stray cat that use to come to my house, so we fed it and took it to the vet, got him all fixed up and placed an ad for a new home, I stated VERY clearly in the ad,

Cat looking for a home, NO KIDS, and inside only

Wire mesh fence sounds great--electrified!

The little brazen bastards need to be shocked good the first time. If they try the shit a second time, turn up the electricity and fry their asses.

Keep working more hours, CF people! Millions of breeders depend on us.

Hear, hear, catmeow!

They sound a lot like the clueless dopes who skateboard in my neighborhood and in front of my building and in our private parking lot. Could they all be related? LOL

Put a sign out: registered sex offender

Hi, everyone! Thanks for all of the wonderful suggestions. It feels so great knowing I have my CF buddies here to understand my rant. Most people would tell me to get over myself, and stop being the neighborhood's mean cat lady. I actually aspire to be the best mean cat lady this hood has ever seen!!


Two cents said:

"Put a sign out: registered sex offender"

Ya know, you would think that might make these welfare breeders keep their kids a little closer to home, but I know for a fact it won't. We have 4 registered offender in this neighborhood and 2 more one street over.

Feh, your idea is priceless! Some of them might be too used to the smell of a drunken clown to be afraid. Really, you should see the men that live with their mothers!

Thanks again for all of your great ideas. My blood pressure has dropped and I'm calm and pleasant once again. DH and I are going to look at a house tomorrow in a neighboring town. We've been house hunting and trying to sell our home for a little more than a year. Wish me luck on leaving the slums!!

If you've got registered sex offenders in the neighborhood, next time you see that brats give them one of the addresses and tell them that THIS neighbor LOVES children and has LOTS of games, cool toys and CANDY.

Feh, take the clown idea one step further. Hire some smelly, drunken homeless guy to wear a clown outfit with a large codpiece. "Come on, kids, Kinko the Clown wants to say hi!"

Kinko, Kinko, the kid-lovin' clown
If the kids just love me back, I'll never wear a frown

(From one of Dr. Demento's novelty song collections)

Before I escaped from a subdivision in the city a couple of years ago, I had the same problem with kids, their skateboards, stray balls, and electronic toys being flown into my house and up on my driveway. Their dogs hurdling fences and digging up my flowers and shitting right next to my mailbox was problematic enough, but the kids were FAR worse. I am a relatively reserved person by nature and had only raised my voice on a few occasions up until they drove me over the edge, there towards the end. By the time I was at the end of the prison sentence I had lived since moving there, I would stick my head outside a window or stand in the middle of my driveway like a crazy person and yell, SHUTTTTT UPPPPPPPPPPP. Neighbors, especially kids, were afraid of me and avoided me and my property most of the rest of the year I lived there because of my weirdness.

I was told by a neighbor who had known me before I went insane that the other neighbors thought I was mentally ill and possibly dangerous. She said they called me, "That crazy cat lady" and that she had told them repeatedly I was a VERY nice person. I then BEGGED her not to tarnish my new reputation as the "crazy cat lady", because it had given me some semblance of peace from the constant torment.:spin

Kinko the clown. Can I "copy" that idea?

Ah ha ha ha...er, sorry.

Brandish a broom next time.

If this doesn't work, a shotgun!

You did good to save the helpless animal from the heathens.

bratBgone Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I actually
> aspire to be the best mean cat lady this hood has
> ever seen!!

Me too! I'm doing pretty well so far - like kidlesskim said, I'd rather have the breeders and sprogs think I'm nuts and be afraid of me than bugging me.

And yeah, thanks for rescuing that poor kitty! Evil little bastards.

Quote
deegee
They sound a lot like the clueless dopes who skateboard in my neighborhood and in front of my building and in our private parking lot. Could they all be related? LOL

The only good thing about all the lousy weather we have had the last few months is that it kept all the stupid skateboarders away. However, we had a mild day yesterday and the stupid kyds were back. I go downstairs to get the mail and they were all over the south entrance to our building's lobby. My apartment lies over the north entrance but a wing of the building prevents me from viewing the other entrance. I went outside to yell at them but they had this clueless look on their faces and did not even run away like a bunch of cockroaches. Another resident of my building yelled at them and they still did not move. We got our mail and left the lobby area but the kyds were still there. It was after 5 PM so the super was off regular duty (his main office is in my building of the apartment complex).

But I do know the first name of one of the kyds now - Ryan - because I heard one of them yell out that name to one of the others. As much as I hate to do it, I am going to have to call the village police to keep these trespassers away. My fear is that the kyds will be gone by the time they arrive. Many apartments overlook the south entrance so I wonder why nobody there has yelled at them to chase them away.



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"I thank god I'm an atheist!" -- Mike "Meathead" Stivic (from All in the Family)

I'm quite partial to the idea of a very tall, very electrified fence. Any little snot-nosed crotch-droppings try to get in my yard to torment my animals and plants, and they'll be rushed to the hospital for 3rd degree electrical burns (whereupon I would be immediately sued by their parents and/or arrested, I'm sure).

spiky plants, large bushes with long thorns. so long as its entirely on your side. you are covered, they then are trespassing. and its a nice decorative plant.

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I just post the stories, for interest.. for everyone

Lord, what fools these mortals be!
- A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Act III, Scene ii

Voltaire said: "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."

H.L.Mencken wrote:"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. Albert Einstein

Quote
mercurior
spiky plants, large bushes with long thorns. so long as its entirely on your side. you are covered, they then are trespassing. and its a nice decorative plant.

Good thing my favorite plants are cacti. The larger and spikier, the better. *Rubs hand together evilly*

Hawthorn as a border plant is your friend. Terribly spiky and you practically have to prune it in a hazmat suit but bushy, dense, pretty, flowering, common and easy to get, and NOT kid-friendly.

Stinging nettle, a/k/a "Seven-minute Itch" is good too, but it can become an invasive weed, so use with caution.

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"I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell"

:eatu

Prunus spinosa Blackthorn, Crataegus monogyna Hawthorn, plenty of the roses have nice thorns, they are all pretty as well, holly is a good one too..

http://www.bbc.co.uk/gardening/plants/plant_finder/index.shtml

this has a searchable list of plants.

i like the thorny plants as they are safe for wildlife, lots of birds etc..

this is from a uk police site..

http://www.met.police.uk/crimeprevention/garden.htm

One of the best ways to keep thieves out is to use nature's own defence mechanisms to stop intruders. A barrier of prickly hedge may be all the protection you need around your property. Here are some suggestions for plants to use

(we have this one) Firethorn Pyracantha 'Orange Glow' - Flowers white in June, with bright orange-red berries. Thorny stem. Height 10-15ft. Suitable for north or east-facing wall or as impenetrable hedging

*********************************************************************************************************************************
I just post the stories, for interest.. for everyone

Lord, what fools these mortals be!
- A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Act III, Scene ii

Voltaire said: "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."

H.L.Mencken wrote:"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. Albert Einstein

I think it's time for you to plant a giant Bougainvillea plant across that fence.

Ah, Stinging Nettle! I had the misfortune of brushing against one of those beasties on a hike. That stuff is -roll-on-the-floor-in-agony painful!