Working Mom ranting about judgemental SAHM's

Article from HeartlessBitches.com

The SAHM
By Jessica Wilson
(Sept 30, 2008)

One month ago I gave birth to a gorgeous baby girl. Apparently this recent edition to my family qualified me for a lifetime membership to my neighborhood's chapter of the Power-Walking Stroller-Pushing Moms group. Every neighborhood has one of these groups. You can always spot them right after the 8:45 school bus picks up the older "sibs". They are the women with the high performance 3 wheeled strollers, ipods and Evian walking in groups of 3-6. They meet daily (weather permitting) and discuss Cheerios, Gymborie and how much they DO NOT approve of Hannah Montana. These women are always in search of new members and will pounce on a woman at the first sight of a belly bulge. Last week I was invited to join them for their morning stroll and at the time I figured my ass was not getting any smaller hanging around the house, so I joined in.

Big mistake. These women scared me.

First off, they all asked me to share my "birth story". Apparently they wanted a graphic play-by-play account of the day my daughter was born. They wanted all the details from the start to finish. Then they wanted to know about feeding, burping, and bowel movements (my daughter's - not mine) and how much sleep I am getting. I was asked about my plans for the next year and silly me, I answered that I would be returning to work in about 5 weeks. Those 4 women, traveling at high speeds, pushing HUGE strollers, came to an abrupt halt. I guess that returning to work was the wrong answer. The right answer was probably somewhere between Mommy and Me swim class and Nursery Feng Shui. I was immediately assaulted with pleas for my baby's emotional well being – apparently her developmental milestones will suffer if I am out of the house earning her college fund.

I can tell you that the women who make the choice to stay at home with their kids have my unending respect, I wish I could do it. But in all reality, professionally I can't. And while my kids may not have me at home with them for 8 hours a day, they do have a wonderful caregiver. My household also reaps the benefits of two incomes, such as vacations, good schools, and a warm home. I don't think that by me making the choice to contribute monetarily to my household my children are going to suffer. I also think it’s unfair that I should be judged by the women who made the opposite choice and stay home with their babies. It is a personal choice. I still know that I live for my family, and just because we eat take-out pizza a little too often when my husband and I work late, or the laundry piles up for 2 weeks, does not make me a bad wife or mother. I don't judge these women for staying home, I respect them for it. I know I personally would lose my damn mind if I had their jobs.

To the SAHMs who "pity" my children for my absence 40 hours per week: Step Off. Keep your fucking opinions to yourself. In 18 years my spouse and I will have a sizable chunk of coin set aside for our kids to go to college. No one is suffering. I am not a bad evil woman for relishing the challenges of my professional life. I will not go to Hell for enjoying the break from the madness of 2 kids, 3 cats and a Jack Russel terrier that leaving for work every morning grants me. In fact, I think that by getting out and working I am more committed to family time on weekends and we are all closer as a group because we are not climbing up each other’s asses all week.

Needless to say I was only invited to walk once.

As much as I loathe children, I do agree with this working mom. My SIL is very much of the same mindset. Everybody's situation is different. Just because you stay home and immerse youself in your offspring does not make you the Perfect Parent.

I'm surprised this woman isn't in therapy for what she had to endure from these cunts during her walk with them.

I would send those moron judging moms some gay porn and condoms in the mail.
I might also send their husbands a subscription to Playboy or Penthouse.

Who knows maybe even scheduling my sprinklers to go off at the exact moment they waddle by my yard, might be an option.

But then again I can be a total bitch.

Wow! Really well written. What a dose of fresh air. And- even better- she doesn't lie!

She does make a lot of sense -- on this particular topic at least. But it's a good illustration of 'The Mahmee Club' and how as a woman you're either with them or against them. These shit-for-brains mahmees are so insecure that they tolerate no views that oppose their own, in case it might make their own decisions or views look foolish. So I read this and I think "Yeah? Well try being the CF woman amongst a pack of these brain-dead cows and that, my dear, is when they get unpleasant."

- - - - - - - -
"The death of creativity is a pram in the hallway"
- Cyril Connolly

Granted, I don't care for any of them, but the studies have proven that babies need their mothers to develop bonding.
Sorry fellow CF, this is just plain truth.
It strikes me that 'working moo', the child is just an accessory. Can't afford not to work? She obviously hires a nanny, she probably has a mcmansion, she probably has two vehicles, one an s moo v.
She is doing what she wants to do, rather than what is best for the child.
Having an individual nanny is probably better than the kiddy warehouses, nevertheless, when the kid starts calling the nanny 'mom' I would tell her 'well, yes, the nanny is mommy'.
Like the moos who leave kids in cars, we know where her priority is.

Babies need SOMEONE to take care of them and show them affection and care, not necessarily their mothers. I have some empathy for women who don't want any life outside their children to come to a grinding halt after they sprog.

My own mother stayed home because that's what "good women" of her time did. My siblings and I concur that she resented every minute of it and would have been better off working. She was intelligent and supremely frustrated at home. Moreover, my siblings and I grew up hearing, "I would be running a major coporation if I didn't have you kids." And when I was in my 20's she seriously told me that I "owed" her for staying home with me until age 7.

Ironically my father died young and my mom went back to school and work. Although we were poor, I remember that she was a much happier person working outside the home.

Back to topic: Women would like other women to think that they will be part of the Mommy Club when they sprog. Little do women know that it's a cult, and like any cult things only get trickier once you've already joined. Women can be absolutely vicious to other mothers.

I am childfree because I never pined for children in my life. But another side benefit is that I don't have to deal with crazy, vicious Moo sniping and other parents. (I pity the normal people who are trying to raise kids these days.)

Mostly, I'm glad I opted out of the whole mess.

Kudos to this working mother for not siding with that clique of clucking hens.

She probably chose to bottle-feed her babies, too!:yeah