Married to housewives

I know from experience that men with stay-at-home wives tend to be not be as fulfilled in their relationships. Fellows I have known with stay-at-homes for spouses - either with kids or without - tend to miss having a companion who can understand the hassles of work and being able to talk about these things. Even the good parts of the work world want to be shared with that special someone. Talking about nothing more than what the kids did, housework, and maybe TV shows will get old even if the wife is an excellent caretaker to her spouse, the children, and the home.

Also, I think that when wives work, they're seen as more equal partners in a marriage by the husbands than wives who don't bring home a paycheck.

I personally can't imagine not contributing to DH's and my joint checking account and our joint savings account with my own income, instead of depending on him to earn all of the money that we need for our household expenses, expenses for our pets and fun things like vacations.

I think our house feels more like it's truly "ours" because we both work to pay the mortgage and other expenses, and both of us are putting money toward renovating it (it's an older home). And it's great to both work together to earn and save money for something we really want, like a vacation.

I also can't imagine not having my own personal checking account so I can spend my own money as I wish - no questions asked from DH.

My younger sister has been a SAHM for seven years, and she doesn't have her own checking account or even credit cards that are only in her name, as she doesn't earn an income. Instead, everything she buys is from their joint checking account, which only her husband contributes to. And he can use his earning power against her. More than once I've witnessed him complaining to her about the high cost of something and raising his voice when he says, "I'm the one earning the money!"

I think that if I were a housewife for any reason, I'd still want my own personal checking account so I could buy whatever I want from that - but my DH would still have to give me an "allowance" each month from his paycheck because I wouldn't be earning a paycheck myself. And when one spouse has to take an allowance from the other one or ask the other one for money, the spouses can't be true equals.

The worst are the upper-middle SAHMoos (here, it's the oilmen's wives). They just dump the kids with the Philipino nanny, then go to the gym, shopping, spa, lunch, shopping again while Luisa takes care of someone else's kids for shit all money, no security, and no recognition. The SAHMoos aren't even doing the thing they stayed home to do!

Lynn Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I personally can't imagine not contributing to
> DH's and my joint checking account and our joint
> savings account with my own income
>
> Me too!

Even if I COULD quit my job, I'd still have to make my own money somehow. Even if it were just from my paintings or crafts. I'd probably open a business and end up working more than before!

There's no way I could just sit at home and depend on someone else to provide all the income. If I could afford it, I would work part-time to at least contribute something.

A lot of wives who don't work are like small children when it comes to money. They act as if the husband's earnings grows on trees so they spend, spend, spend only to act so offended if Hubby tells the women to put a lid on the freewheeling with the credit cards and the mall. I can go into detail about one situation I know of but I won't to protect other people's privacy. Still, it makes me wonder how the non-working wife has no gratitude for her husband's hard work yet only wanting more and more to spend on herself.

theres the idea that men are just walking wallets. they think men as being less because they have to go out to work for 80 hours a week.

*********************************************************************************************************************************
I just post the stories, for interest.. for everyone

Lord, what fools these mortals be!
- A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Act III, Scene ii

Voltaire said: "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."

H.L.Mencken wrote:"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. Albert Einstein

You know what I have personally found about men with stay-at-home-wives/moos? They have NO respect for other women in the workplace. They think all women belong home, barefoot and repugnant, and don't take the women they work with seriously. I have run into that a thousand times in the past and so have a lot of other women I talk to. Regardless of the fact that we are married or in serious relationships and have no children, they act like we're just temporary employees until we decide to get knocked up and stay home. Nothing pisses me off more.

There's a manager here at work whose head I'd *LOVE* to use for batting practice..........

I totally agree. Those men only have two uses for women: as breeders (their little wifeys) or as sex toys (the single women they hit on). So I don't feel sorry for them at all. They make me sick.

The moos don't even have to be rich to do nothing. I knew a few SAHmoos who never ever cooked even a 15 min meal or a frozen pizza for their wallets after they came home from work. But, altho not poor either, they were too cheap to eat out/order in, so their hubbies just didn't eat except a bowl of cereal, diet coke, and an occassional bologna sandwich on a paper plate.

I worked w/ their hubbies too and you could tell there was a quiet resentment. But, these middle aged men took it as part of their "diet plan" to get rid of their bulges but they didn't like it. Their wives basically didn't clean either but played paddy cake all day with the toddlers. Some kind of life, huh?

I have known some older men who remain married to these wives because they feel they must lie in the bed they made for themselves whether it would be too costly to divorce or their own guilt which makes them feel they must keep their marital promises. In this way, I think life can be more difficult for men since they are required by society to be the financial support for other people. If a woman is supporting lazy man or a user, people do stand up and say that this is not right.

The couple of guys I know who did this, didn't seem to get divorced because they were afraid of never seeing their kyds again, or only once every other week. Or, really expected this kind of life because they were always told to expect it (this is people of a certain persuasion, but I don't feel racist saying it because the men were of the race and told this to me themselves).

I would love to try to explain to these men, it was the kyds who got them in this position in the first place. Because their wives were pretty hard-working and cool before the sperm met the egg, but as usual, they turn in to Stepford Sheeple after sprogging.

It is funny what people supposedly do for the luv of a child, but live their lives half-heartedly because of it for 20 years. It has to be bittersweet. I'm surprised that more people don't tighten a noose around their necks.

Some husbands with SAHM's gravitate towards emotional affairs with female employees--single and married with sprogs. I've witnessed this in the workplace on more than one occasion. What losers!