Beloved Grandparents Perish in Christmas Eve Blaze

Beloved grandparents perish in Christmas Eve blaze
Cape fire tragedy
By Jessica Fargen and Colneth Smiley Jr.
Friday, December 26, 2008 - Updated 11h ago


WHY did they headline these lovely peoples' tragic death in the way that they did? It makes it seem as if the most important and defining thing that they had ever done in their 70+ years on this earth, was to have been a grandparent. This headline conjures up a mental image of their having been grandparents to 15-20 grandpups, but they only have the one. I have highlighted in bold MANY other things which I thought were as important or MORE important than their having held the coveted title of "grandparent", which could have been used to describe them in the headline instead. Sadly, this associating every adult's death with his relationship to a minor child is so incredibly common in our breederific society. Presumably, this couple would have had to have had a child to get a GRANDchild, so why didn't it read, Beloved parents"?????? I know why and so does everyone else who bothers to ask themselves the question. It's because their child is now an adult and the GRANDchild is still a minor, therefore, the title of GRANDparent depicts their relationship to a chyyyllldd, which is THE most important thing in the fucking world. This just pisses me off.
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"Family members were reeling with grief yesterday after a loving Cape Cod couple who had just celebrated their 56th wedding anniversary perished together in a tragic Christmas Eve house fire.( 56 years of marriage. SURELY that could have been in the headline or perhaps, "Local Pet Groomers Tragically Perish in House Fire After Celebrating Their 56th Wedding Anniversary"


“It’s unbelievable right to this minute,” said Eunice MacIntyre of Fall River, whose sister, Marion Gagnon and her husband, Leo Gagnon, died in Bourne on Wednesday night. ( Oh, the deceased lady had a SISTER and brother in law, not nearly as important as a GRANDkyd)

Relatives described the couple, who wed the day before Leo Gagnon shipped off to serve in the Air Force in the Korean War, as quiet and close.


“She and Leo - every place one went, the other one went,” MacIntyre said.

They leave behind a son, Michael Gagnon, ( Oh, AND a son, whose only claim to fame was undoubtedly spawning the ever important GRANDkyd) and a 13-year-old granddaughter, with whom they celebrated Christmas early - one day before they died, MacIntyre said.

Relatives said they believe the couple was overcome by smoke from a wood-burning stove in the basement of their home. Marion Gagnon called 911 Wednesday night to report heavy smoke, according to two relatives. ( Ah, the unnamed and undescribed, "relatives". We can then be reasonably certain that they were adults then or it would have said, "according to their 16 y/o niece, Kayleigh")

When firefighters arrived at 9:30 p.m., the basement was filled with blinding smoke, said Deputy Fire Chief Joe Carrara. Leo Gagnon, 77, was found in the basement, and Marion, 74, on the first floor, relatives said.

Longtime neighbor Catherine Leach ( Who was probably closer to them than the GRANDchild, who wasn't even named. The neighbors probably didn't even know the kyd's name) said she watched in horror as paramedics tried to resuscitate the couple outside.

“It was a terrible, terrible scene. I will never forget it. They were great neighbors and will be missed,” she said.

The Gagnons were transported to a local hospital and pronounced dead. Fire Marshal Steve Coan said the fire appears to be accidental.

“It is nothing more than an extremely tragic event on Christmas Eve,” he said.

He declined to comment on the cause of the fire until autopsies are complete, but he said investigators know where the fire started.

Leo Gagnon was battling lymphoma, but had just turned a corner with his treatment and was feeling optimistic, ( Quite frankly, I believe that a 77 y/o cancer survivor is FAR more newsworthy than his peepaw status) said his brother, Rene Gagnon ( His brother of nearly 80 years, FAR more important, and closer genetically, than a grandkyd,) of Westport, who talked to his brother only hours before the fire.

“He was so happy and then to find out he died the way he did ... that’s the thing that blew my mind,” he said. “Of all the days of the year, why Christmas?”

Leo Gagnon ran a Cape pet-grooming business for 30 years and Marion worked by his side answering phones and helping in the office, Rene Gagnon said. ( How about, "Local Longtime Animal Lovers Die in Tragic House Fire"???)

Yesterday, Rene Gagnon recalled the couple’s wedding, a $40 affair that was hastily arranged at a Howard Johnson’s so the lovebirds could marry before Leo Gagnon shipped off to war. Rene Gagnon was best man at the Dec. 4, 1952, ceremony. They were very much in love,” he said."
( Why not, "Local Couple Still in Love After 56 Years, Perish in Each Other's Arms".



They had a son and a daughter in law, sisters, brothers, longtime friends and neighbors, no doubt hundreds of customers, a host of other relatives and after 56 years of marriage his wife STILL didn't leave that smoke filled house after having called 9-11, choosing to stay there and wait with her beloved husband instead. They served the animals and their owners in the community for over 30 years, but NONE of that is as important to society as their having had a grandchild.

Of course. The grandbrat trumps any other achievements in their lives.

I was also wondering how the headline would have read had they been killed at ages 64 and 61, instead of 77 and 74, BEFORE the now 13 y/o grandkyd had been born???? Any one of my suggested headlines would have been better than the current one and I am sure that a clever newspaper writer could have thought of even more suitable ones. Society truly believes that 60 plus years of lifetime accomplishments, including serving in The Korean War, over 50 years of marriage, owning/operating a successful animal care business for over 30 years,, etc.......PALES in comparison to producing children. The fact that it's made known in subtle ways, like these headlines, seems to make it worse. How can anyone really say anything about it without coming across petty, when it's done in such a covert way??? Something about that is very unsettling to me.

It reminds me of religious type famblees who profess to have no ill or negative feelings with their child who has what they consider "non traditional" living arrangements, like shacking with a boyfriend. That BF could be "in that famblee" for any number of years, welcomed, included, shown love, etc........but the tell tale sign of their ever so subtle covert actions which demonstrate their TRUE feelings is when the one recently married sister of 3 weeks and the sister with the "live in" BF of 8 years or so happen to BOTH spend the night at mom and dad's on the same night WITH their mates. The MARRIED for 3 weeks sister get's her old room which will be all nice, clean, freshened up, aired out, freshly painted, with new linens and made up to rival a nice hotel room.,...Sealy postropedic mattress, queen sized bed and an adjoining bathroom, and maybe even a stocked mini-refrigerator, as an added touch. , However, the sister who is there with the live in BF of 8 years, will be led to the closet sized spare room which hasn't been used as anything other than storage for decades, and will find a cleared pathway that leads up to a set of bunk beds made up with The Simpsons linens.

It's the same type thing, IMO. It is directly that they think living together is a sin, and INDIRECTLY, the marriage is not expected to produce GRANDkyds, so the sister with the s/o rather than a husband is less valued within the famblee (AND society) and in many ways is not treated as well. COVERT and SUBTLE, many breeders are and I do not care much for it. It's found in advertising, used as a sales tool for everthing from life insurance to new cars, as tax "rewards", social services in ALL areas including police and fire, and apparently we can't even DIE, without being associated with it. People who would normally have a "one liner" after their death, (because they didn't DO SHIT in their sorry lives) will be written up and glorifed, IF they had living minor children or grandkyds, at the time of their death. That older Menendez boy (now a man) who premeditated and SLAUGHTERED his own parents, has married in prison and was allowed a conjugal visit and she of course, had popped out a kyd. There was an entire segment about the woman and that kyd on a documentary. ????? I do NOT "get that".:

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kidlesskim
I was also wondering how the headline would have read had they been killed at ages 64 and 61, instead of 77 and 74, BEFORE the now 13 y/o grandkyd had been born???? Any one of my suggested headlines would have been better than the current one and I am sure that a clever newspaper writer could have thought of even more suitable ones. Society truly believes that 60 plus years of lifetime accomplishments, including serving in The Korean War, over 50 years of marriage, owning/operating a successful animal care business for over 30 years,, etc.......PALES in comparison to producing children. The fact that it's made known in subtle ways, like these headlines, seems to make it worse. How can anyone really say anything about it without coming across petty, when it's done in such a covert way??? Something about that is very unsettling to me.

It is also very off-putting to me when I have to read similarly stilted stories in our local paper...it's as if lives a person's life has no value to society in general unless they have replicated! Makes me wonder if the scientist who someday cures cancer will have an obituary that reads, parent of x children, grandparent of x children, and oh, by the way, also did some boring genetic research that led to the eradication of cancer, but let's talk more about the grandkids!

Father drowns on family holiday
28/12/2008 3:52:00 PM.



" A 40-year-old surfer drowned on the NSW Central Coast is believed to have struck an underwater object or a sand bar.

Lifesavers pulled the man from the surf at The Entrance about 10.30am (AEDT) on Sunday after he'd been helped by a member of the public.

NSW Ambulance Services said lieguards conducted CPR on the man before transferring him to a nearby park where an ambulance helicopter with a doctor was waiting.

"They continued to do more treatment but unfortunately the gentleman didn't respond and he was pronounced deceased at the scene," spokeswoman Penelope Little told AAP.

A spokesman for Surf Life Saving Central Coast Stuart Harvey told AAP he believed the man had either hit a rock shelf or a sand bar.

"It was a very calm morning there at The Entrance. Unfortunately, we believe he's come head first either into the rock shelf or the sand," he said.

Mr Harvey said the man was believed to be visiting the area with his family during the Christmas break.

"They were staying in holiday apartments there ... His wife was with him, his brother was with him, his brother's wife was with him as well."

It was unsure whether the man had any children with him.

Mr Harvey added that the lifesavers involved were "okay but a little distressed".

He said he wanted to encourage all beachgoers to heed the advice of lifesavers and make sure they check the beach signs that provide information on conditions.

"We're there to make it safe," he said.

"We hate having tragedies like this."




Here's YET another "father" dies headline. When you read the headline, " Father Drowns on Family Holiday", it conjures up mental images of a 20 something daddy playing "Marco Polo" in the pool of a Howard Johnson with his elementary school aged children. Perhaps there's even a toddler just cooing away in a nearby pac n play, who witnessed the whole dreadful freak accident as daddy becomes helplessly entangled in a pool volleyball net as he struggles flapping about while drowning. The headline deceives you into picturing things like this along with a frantic young wife and a terrified bunch of kyds, as they look on in horror as daddy tries to come up for a breath of air as the net cruelly forces him to to remain submerged, just shy of success. The backdrop to the traumatic event is worsened by the visual of an indoor Christmas tree, lights glistening through the glass enclosure, and some piped in Christmas carols resounding in the pool area over loud speakers.

INSTEAD, what we have here is a 40 y/o man who is on vacation with his wife and inlaws, (no kyds in sight) while SURFING and no one even knows if the kyds were even there OR of their ages. He could have been the father of a 22 y/o adult, which if this had been known, then the headline would have IMMEDIATELY been changed to something else. chyld related if at all possible, of course. It would have been, "Grandfather to be.....died", or if they got REALLY desperate, they would have said something like, "Children Playing Nearby on the Beach Watched in Terror as Man Dies", but no chyldren were harmed, so you can all rest easy.". I have to conclude that since the reporter could not verify if any children were even there with him, then there is NO WAY that he could have known the state of the man's child status, UNLESS he asked. He would have HAD to have just come out and asked one of the famblee, in the middle of the EMT performing CPR, and all of the panic that no doubt was at the scene, "Does he have any children?". There is no other logical explanation for his knowing that the man was a "father".

Once he found out that he did indeed have children though, THAT is the headline that he chose to run with because afterall, his being a father would have had to have been the most important thing that this dead man had ever done in his life. MY GOD I am so sick of reading headline after tragic headline of deaths by accident and murder and they ALL center around the relationship that the victim had to a minor chlyd. I honestly believe that if my husband and I were tragically killed, that my inlaws would have the local paper say, "Beloved Aunt and Uncle Killed in Freak Cat Tripping Incident". They might even toss in something like, "....unable to have children of their own, they were a WONDERFUL aunt and uncle to their nephews and niece... " and then list THEIR names and ages, interests, etc.....................

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married with rabbits
You really have a point, Kim. In that first article we see other family members and the long time neighbor, neither a focus of the article. Always a way to bring that damn baybee into the picture.

That last bit you mentioned about 'aunt and uncle' really hit me. I'm an aunt. I'm not at all involved in those kid's lives. I would HATE to think that if I died in some freak accident the headline would point out my aunt status as it's focus. I just 'happen' to be an aunt. It's circumstancial. I can't avoid it.

Now I'm wondering about people who are estranged from their families and what articles about them look like. I know a lady who died and we noticed something about her obituary. It had tons of info about her husband, kids, and her husband's family, but hardly anything about her own. I know she has an ex and married a man around 15 years younger than her, so I'm thinking that may have caused a rift with her own biological family. But there was literally tons said about her husband's family. They really took her in as one of their own. To be honest if her own family didn't care for her anymore, then I'm glad to see her obituary as honest.

I shudder to think, MWR. It really doesn't matter I don't guess, since I would be dead anyway and wouldn't know, but something about preparing a shitty and misleading obituary for a relative just rubs me the wrong way. First of all, it needs to be written by someone who at least knew the deceased very well. Even better than that though, I think that EVERYONE should write his own obit. I haven't done that as of yet, but I plan on it now that the idea has resurfaced in my mind, I believe that less is better with obituaries anyway and I hate the ones that list each and every distant famblee member and name faithful hospice employees and all like that, because an obit should be a brief synopsis of the persons' life and include close survivors' names, not people who were doing their jobs well as hospice nurses, their Friday night beer drinking buddies at the local VFW, their favorite bank teller, or list blood relatives who they hated. I think that every obit should also have the cause of death as well. It PISSES me off to see that a former school chum, "Died at her home", last week, Died how? Had she been ill, did her husband beat her to death, did she trip over the vacuum and crack her skull, did she commit suicide? I don't understand WHY cause of death is such a sensitive matter because sooner or later, people find out if it's an "embarrassing" death, so to speak, like when people die from AIDS, suicide, drunk driving, or even murder.

Maybe if they just went on and said, "Millicent died quietly with a Hayden Concerto playing in the background at her residence on Monday night, by her own hand.", or "While tending to the garden that she so loved on Sunday morning,, Mildred suffered a massive heart attack.." or "After an extended terminal illness, Herbert passed away at Mercy General with his wife at his side last Tuesday", or "Mary died at The Elk's Lodge on Wednesday afternoon from injuries that she sustained as a victim of domestic violence", or "Stan passed away at Southside Health facility on Saturday morning as a result of injuries he received as the victim of a car jacking in the mall parking lot on Friday night", or "Antonio "Cheeseburger" Torres died late Friday night due to a rival gang war which resulted in his shooting death", ..... then people wouldn't be calling and asking questions or spreading rumors about what may have happened. I ALWAYS want to know how someone died and where and I think that most people do. Why is it such a secret when it comes to the obituary? I suppose I can't write that part in myself, but I can damned sure leave instructions.

Oh, and I think it's great that the lady had a factual article/obit written about her. I have certainly seen some doozies that included famblee members that the deceased hated their ever living guts, who were listed, as if they were close. I also think it's tacky to list former (living and divorced from) spouses, but I have seen that too. It's ESPECIALLY tacky if they have a current (and alive) spouse. My mother had a friend who died and her daugher wrote hers up. She had been divorced from the daughter's father for over TWENTY YEARS and hated his guts. He is living AND has been remarried for at least 15 years too. The deceased was ALSO remarried to a still living man. Here's about how it read:

Mrs. Maryanne Crumley is survived by her husband Alfred Crumley, they have no children together. She is also survived by a former husband, Mr Clyde Smith and his wife Wanita....................THEN she want on to list all of the children that her mom and dad had together first, HIS children with his new wife, and the NEW wife's children from another marriage. NO MENTION was made of the current surviving husband's prior kyds, even though she was their step mother and got along well with them. IF she ever met any of her ex-husband's wife's prior kyds (who were listed in the obit) I never knew about it. I also don't think she did much more than see the new kyds, except maybe in passing. What a SHITTY OBITUARY.

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married with rabbits

That last bit you mentioned about 'aunt and uncle' really hit me. I'm an aunt. I'm not at all involved in those kid's lives. I would HATE to think that if I died in some freak accident the headline would point out my aunt status as it's focus. I just 'happen' to be an aunt. It's circumstancial. I can't avoid it. .

Also being an aunt, I love my niece and nephew. But to have my own existence marginalized in the wake of a tragedy that happened to ME, is inconceivable.