#1429 - Losing one's identity

This is a big pet peeve of mine! I communicate with some women on a crafting message board, and it drives me nuts to see something like "Joe Blow" or "Joe and Jane Blow", as opposed to just "Jane Blow".

The worst one I saw was someone who had *Mrs. Blow* as the name that shows up in the e-mail box. No first name.

I did take my husband's last name when I married him, but that was my choice...I'd rather have his name than my ex-husband's or my asshole father's.

We used to have AOHell, where we each had our own screen name. When we switched to Verizon, they only offered one e-mail account at the time. I had already signed on with an e-mail provider independent of any ISP, since I'm online a lot and we'd been changing ISPs a lot to find one that didn't completely suck. Meowmail.com is free, but I pay $20 a year for extra features such as spam filters and POP e-mail. I've been using it for years, and it is in MY name. So Catdaddy took the one Verizon.net e-mail addy. He has an *alum.mit.edu* re-direct anyway that he gives out to people, so all he had to do when we changed ISPs is to change the re-direct.

But now they offer 9 e-mail addresses per account, eight of which we'll never use. Maybe I should set up e-mail accounts for each of my cats?

I've never understood these women who have email addresses like "Mom2snotley" or "Suziesmom" or "momof3". UGH! Weren't you a person before you were a mom?

And yeah, I also took my husband's last name, mainly because I've always hated mine (no one can spell it). But the whole identifying yourself by your husband's FIRST name is really weird and old-fashioned, and I don't understand why any modern woman would do it.

I was once in an AOL chat room about 8 years ago, and this one woman had some dumb screen name like "JoesWife". Every comment she made in this chat was "Do you know my husband, Joe?" or "I'm Joe's wife". I swear to god, it was the weirdest thing! It was all I could do not to type: "So...tell me something about YOURSELF!"

Even on an internet account where there only one e-mail address is allowed, the married couple can name it "thesmiths@whatever.net" or "jane_and_joe@whatever.net". My cousin had "thegman#1@whatever.net"...gag me! She probably uses the e-mail more yet her husband had to be Mr. Macho with his ID. I also hate it when a woman introduces herself saying, "My name is Mrs. Richard Jones." I want to say, "Don't you have your own name?"

Again...gag me...

CF Scorpio Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I've never understood these women who have email
> addresses like "Mom2snotley" or "Suziesmom" or
> "momof3". UGH! Weren't you a person before you
> were a mom?

In short: no. That's why they became moos.

I am sure that my cousin is also known as "Carrie & Julie's mom" rather than by her own name. She is either "what's-his-as$" wife or the kids' moo. She did tell me how nothing is really her own after having her two children yet she keeps it going by allowing her ID to be taken over by that husband as well.

She is also a SAHM so that makes it worse. Sad thing is that this lady has a college eduation and a career before she married and had those babies. For a time, she helped in her husband's medical practice. She says she wants to work part-time in the mornings -- typical moo job. She had asked her husband if he needed help in his office. "No," was his answer. He probably does not even want to be around his wife that much anymore.

It does disgust me how women do this to their lives. She was fortunate to be able to go to university and get a good education on her parents' money. She did not have to bust her a** working while going to school at the same time. Now, she is reduced to taking a low-paying "morning" job somewhere while the sprogs are in school.

I have been looked down upon by someone who used to be close to me (still there but not "close" any longer) because I have no real education except certification from a vocational school for a job I used to do. It took only two weeks for my certificate and then the license. Person who said this to me also did not have to work while getting his degree. It is very easy to look down on someone else when one had an easier time of it.

I may be considered "uneducated" to certain people but - at least - I don't depend on a man, work full-time, take care of myself, and have my own life.

My husband and I have our own email accounts and email addresses. Mine has my name with his/ and his, with his own first name. ect.

---

lab mom

ISTR a nice rant about having "Mom" work its way into the e-mail address from The Misanthropic Bitch some years ago, in 2001 I think.

Even DW's sister has that in her e-mail address.

India, I know plenty of degreed people who don't have a lick of sense, and a good lot of them didn't have to pay a penny for their education, or even work for their spending money while in school. My aunt is a doctor, and she is in the process of raising one of the most horrific sprog boys I have ever met. All those years in school, and she can't manage to make her lips form the word "no" to her spoiled wondersprog. Don't worry about about that person who considers you "uneducated." His parents may have paid for his education, but they neglected to teach him manners. Telling you that was rude!

Isn't if funny how people think it's *SO ADORABLE* to be known as CuntleighsMommy or MomToShitford in email addresses, on license plates, etc., but heaven forbid you'd give yourself the email address of IMake6Figures@hotmail.com, you'd be considered, vain, shallow and greedy?

That's because it's OK to brag about snots - but not real, actual personal accomplishments! They're basically doing what any cat or dog can do, so they have to glorify it because they don't want to be reminded.

Thank-you for your kind words, Sherz. This man I knew did not work after going back to university for his degree a little later in life. His WIFE paid all of the bills while he maybe gave her $200 a month towards expenses. His father paid for ALL of his books and most of his tuition. Yet, I am the one who is "uneducated". I know I should not let those words sting...