Re: Feeling a little guilty... March 13, 2014 | Registered: 15 years ago Posts: 6,607 |
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brown-eyed diamond
Thank you, everybody.
Hmm. You all have pointed out a lot of red flags I didn't see. But I just remembered something from the last conversation we had before I broke it off. This was when I pointed out how eager he seemed for sex.
Him: Just one of those bucket list things.
Me: You've had sex before. How is it on your bucket list?
Him: I've never taken anyone's virginity before.
Yes, he knew damn well I've never had sex before. I made this clear as day and I actually freaked out when he got explicit as he did. I kept thinking why would you talk like that to someone you know hasn't had sex or done anything sexual?
Re: Feeling a little guilty... March 13, 2014 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 1,720 |
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starbelly
Google Dan Savage and the Campsite Rule, and then insist that whoever you give it up to follows that rule. To paraphrase:
Campsite Rule: in relationships with a large age (or in this case experience) disparity, at the end of the relationship, the elder (or more experienced) partner should leave the younger (less experienced) partner in "better shape than they found them". This includes no diseases, no fertilized eggs, no undue emotional trauma, and whatever education that can be provided.
Re: Feeling a little guilty... March 13, 2014 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 1,788 |
Re: Feeling a little guilty... March 13, 2014 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 5,716 |
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evil ~
My husband and I lived an hour apart in 2 different states so he really doesn't have a good excuse for not meeting you before now.
Re: Feeling a little guilty... March 13, 2014 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 4,100 |
Re: Feeling a little guilty... March 13, 2014 | Registered: 11 years ago Posts: 922 |
Re: Feeling a little guilty... March 13, 2014 | Registered: 11 years ago Posts: 2,176 |
Re: Feeling a little guilty... March 14, 2014 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 12,441 |
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brown-eyed diamond
Him: Just one of those bucket list things.
Me: You've had sex before. How is it on your bucket list?
Him: I've never taken anyone's virginity before.
Yes, he knew damn well I've never had sex before. I made this clear as day and I actually freaked out when he got explicit as he did. I kept thinking why would you talk like that to someone you know hasn't had sex or done anything sexual?
Re: Feeling a little guilty... March 14, 2014 | Registered: 11 years ago Posts: 469 |
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gfsquirrel
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starbelly
Google Dan Savage and the Campsite Rule, and then insist that whoever you give it up to follows that rule. To paraphrase:
Campsite Rule: in relationships with a large age (or in this case experience) disparity, at the end of the relationship, the elder (or more experienced) partner should leave the younger (less experienced) partner in "better shape than they found them". This includes no diseases, no fertilized eggs, no undue emotional trauma, and whatever education that can be provided.
Damn...that is about the most sensible, realistic, kind-hearted philosophy about behaviour/early sexual relationships I've ever seen. Absolutely brilliant.
Re: Feeling a little guilty... April 04, 2014 | Registered: 11 years ago Posts: 922 |
Re: Feeling a little guilty... April 05, 2014 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 12,045 |
Re: Feeling a little guilty... April 07, 2014 | Registered: 10 years ago Posts: 480 |
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brown-eyed diamond
We didn't have any trouble talking about other things and he didn't get "descriptive" until that night.
I wanted to stay friends and he even said it was my call. But when I said I wanted to, he said he didn't want to talk to me anymore.
Now that I think about it, it's possible we would've only had a hookup relationship. We live in different counties (30-40 minute between our towns), he wouldn't be able to see me until after four o'clock on weekdays (his work schedule) and weekends were out because he was often helping his parents.
Re: Feeling a little guilty... April 07, 2014 | Registered: 10 years ago Posts: 480 |
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juliewashere88
There's nothing to feel guilty about. You don't owe anyone sex just because they spend time with you.
Re: Feeling a little guilty... April 07, 2014 | Registered: 10 years ago Posts: 480 |
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Dorisan
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brown-eyed diamond
Thank you, everybody.
Hmm. You all have pointed out a lot of red flags I didn't see. But I just remembered something from the last conversation we had before I broke it off. This was when I pointed out how eager he seemed for sex.
Him: Just one of those bucket list things.
Me: You've had sex before. How is it on your bucket list?
Him: I've never taken anyone's virginity before.
Yes, he knew damn well I've never had sex before. I made this clear as day and I actually freaked out when he got explicit as he did. I kept thinking why would you talk like that to someone you know hasn't had sex or done anything sexual?
:kill
If he ever communicates with you again, tell that rat bastard there are about a dozen online buddies who'd like to gang up and kick the ever lovin' crap out of him mob
Bucket list my ass. What a POS