Hello Sharon! Yes, people here are for the most part very civil, even when it comes to trolls.
There's a very, very sad story about my best friend.
I have been friends with her since she and I were in college and both of us were doing data entry in an "electronic sweatshop". We couldn't be more opposite-I the eclectic party gal and she the girly-girl with the matching sweater and earrings. We joked about the reason we got along so well being that we had completely different taste in men, so we never fought over a guy.
She met her husband while she was working in an HR dept at a local company, and he was junior legal counsel. He is a little older than her. Well, it was a fairly quick engagement, maybe 2 years from dating to the altar. I didn't get to see her much after that for a while.
Between working for her husband in his eventual private practice, and having a little girl to raise, and be a good housewife, she and I never got to talk. In 8 years, I saw her once and chatted on the phone a handful of times, with her hanging up because he was coming home. I asked her if things were okay between them, and she always said yes, that he was just so busy with things and very type-A.
A couple of years ago, I was in a really low spot in my life. She and I reconnected, and I went to visit her in her new home. It was practically a palace! A McMansion all the way, but nicer than what I had and have going on. We spent some time together for one day and then she scurried me off because hubby would be home soon. I told her I'd be more than happy to help her out, as I'm well versed in the legal assistant field, and I could do a little laundry, spend time with her and her daughter...and she could get a well earned respite from the day in day out sloggery she was doing.
About six months after that, she tells me she's pregnant again. She doesn't sound thrilled at all. And again, I offer any help I can, but she declines. A couple months after that, she left me a message telling to call her husband about doing some work. I call him and find out she left him.
Long story short, he's a dick. She knew she was pregnant, but was afraid to tell him because he had started to turn abusive. She had had enough, and put some money from their large joint account into another account in her name, knowing that she would have all the credit cards snipped by him if it came down to her walking out. She got pregnant when her daughter was sick in the hospital, and he was "too busy" to give her relief from sitting with her so she could go home, take a shower, and take her b/c pills. When she got home from the hospital, he insisted she do her other wifely duty, KWIM?
He flipped when she eventually told him when she was pregnant. Shortly after this, she had a change of heart and came clean about the money. He flipped and threw her and their daughter, out of the house. Credit cards were snipped in about ten minutes, she said.
Now I work for him part time, and am friends with her still. I tell him when he's being an asshole and keep her informed of anything she might need to know. He's being obstinate about the divorce proceedings and I so want to kick him in the head for being so, as he blames everything on her, which isn't the truth, and he knows I know it.
Anyway, the point is, even when my friend's life looked so wonderful from the outside, I wouldn't trade my life for hers ever. I may not have a lot, but at least I have a DH that doesn't come home at 2 am reeking of Eternity.
FWIW, she is a PNB, but still drives a SMOOOV with all the DVDs and crap. But the kids are cute, even if her new son is the spitting image of the dick that helped create him. Her daughter was in my wedding, as was she, and she was very well behaved and a joy.
She is very supportive of my thoughts on remaining childless for the time being, and I can tell her if she's overdoing the soccer mom thing.