Mooing and Lowing Over Lost Clots and NO Attention

http://community.babycenter.com/post/a27898497/never_felt_so_alone.



1)I had a miscarriage on May 8 (Mothers Day) of this year. This was my first pregnancy. As many of you can relate, the devastation I feel cannot be put into words. It has been very difficult to say the least, but my husband has been great support. The reason I decided to post is to get advice. I have been feeling extremely lonely and depressed, and these feelings have only been magnified because my family and friends have deserted me. My "best friend" has never called me, even when I was in the hospital. No friends have come to visit. My own family has done the same. No one has called, no one asks about me, and I don't get invited to any family function.

I feel as though no one cares about me, and no one cares about my baby. This miscarriage has taken a big toll on me emotionally. Knowing now that the people who I thought were my family, are not, makes me miss my baby that much more. I feel so alone, confused, depressed, and angry. I have tried looking for someone to speak with in person, online, at work, but to no avail. If anyone can offer advice, please do. I'm desperate.:bawl

2)I too feel very alone, my best friend/nieghbor was there when I m/c but hasn't been around much since. Even when we see her pull in she rushes to close the garage door to avoid us. My husband seems to think everything in our relationship is my fault and has shut down compleetly. It's been 4 months and I can't say I've made much progress at all. I've tried reaching out to other women around me (I'm adopted so my mother's no help since she has never even been pregnant, nor would she like to help in the first place) But I only get a few words of encouragement and then I feel I'm passed over for something more important......."

3) When I announced that I was pregnant, my sister decided to move home from North Carolina where her and her Marine husband are separated. Like the day after I lost the baby, she turned around and decided to stay. My mom and I who are SO close, hardly speak anymore. I feel like I can't talk to her about this. She does this weird thing where she can't say the word, 'Pregnant' and keeps telling me I'll get "That way" again. ..... She has pretty much abandoned me to take care of grandparents, aunts, and other family members. I do not want to be selfish, but this is a time in my life that I have needed her most, and I feel like she's left me high and dry.........

4) When I lost my second son, I had already told my two boys (6 and 9) and they were so excited to be big brothers. I hated the foggy grief that followed for months. I hated every time I saw a new mom or a baby stroller. Now it has been 8 months and finally the pain is not so raw.

5) At the hospital, I finally got to look at my son. He was perfect (minus the fact that the ship doctor had haphazardly wrapped him in a bed pad and stuffed him in plastic tub). He had all his fingers and toes and he had my nose. I don't understand what happened. And, because they wanted to find out what happened, they shipped him off to a lab for testing....... It was a blessing to be able to travel home with my sons and the rest of my family there to support me. However, now I am home and it breaks my heart to know that we left him there to be treated like a tissue sample!



They think the WHOLE WORLD should stop when they've had a miscarriage. Neighbors, friends, and family are avoiding them and I'll bet it's for a good reason.

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If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!

It did not detail the timeframe...I think I would have greater empathy for a MC lost at 5 months and beyond (when it can actually possibly survive) than a late period. I also have more empathy for close friends and family than random people I run into as an acquaintance...really I don't know you so keep your sad story to your close friends and relatives.

And maybe these women are abandoned because they forget the world does not revolve around their uteri.

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From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
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I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."

http://www.ivf.com/misc.html


"....The truth isn't that you will be delighted to hear that a friend or other loved one has just given birth to a healthy baby.
The truth is that you may find it very difficult to be around mothers with young babies. You may be hurt, or angry, or jealous. You may wonder why you couldn't have had that joy. You may be resentful, or refuse to see friends with new babies. You may even secretly wish that the same thing would happen to someone else. You want someone to understand how it feels. You may also feel very ashamed that you could wish such things on people you love or care about, or think that you must be a dreadful person. You aren't. You're human, and even the most loving people can react this way when they are actively grieving. If the situations were reversed, your friends would be feeling and thinking the same things you are. Forgive yourself. It's OK. These feelings will eventually go away...."



Of all the bad things that have ever happened to me, I have NEVER wished them upon a loved for any reason. In fact, I am glad certain things happened to me rather than my parents or sisters because I couldn't stand the thought of them suffering. I had always thought that was a bit selfish, until now.

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If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!

I wonder how much mooing and whining and "poor meeee" went on, before famblee and friends actually had enough, and cut these womben off? I would be able to console a person only so much before it would start to become annoying. The pity party can't go on forever, after all.
Most people who have lost a parent or spouse don't even go on about it as much as these attention-whoring martyr moos do. It quite frankly makes me ill. If they are soo mentally unstable that they react with so much emotion over a miscarriage, then maybe they shouldn't sprog at all?
It's not as if they lost a live, real baybee. They had a miscarriage. I can understand them being upset if they really wanted to have a kyd, but c'mon! It isn't right to make everyone else suffer, just because she's feeling sorry for herself...and they call us selfish!
I can only imagine the moo who lost her clot on Moo Day. How miserable she must make everyone else feel around her. No wonder people run away when these bitches come around.

It blows to lose something you really wanted. But if you are alienating your friends and loved ones, it's time to see a therapist to deal with your emotions, because the average person on the street isn't qualified to help you.

And btw, an early miscarriage is not the loss of an actual baybee. It is your body flushing out defective, damaged goods that it didn't want. A miscarriage is your body's way of getting rid of stuff that can't live or function. Be thankful since the zygote could have hung on and then grown into one of those vegetable kyds with no brain or a fetus that had to be aborted in the 11th hour because of catastrophic abnormalities.

She has tried talking to her co-workers? That's a sure way to turn into the office pariah! This womban seems to have no sense of boundaries and different spheres of life, so in that way she's the perfect breeder-in-training. You don't need to share your personal emotions with your co-workers or neighbors; save that shit for your family and friends. People at work do not want to hear about how you feel!

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yurble
She has tried talking to her co-workers? That's a sure way to turn into the office pariah! This womban seems to have no sense of boundaries and different spheres of life, so in that way she's the perfect breeder-in-training. You don't need to share your personal emotions with your co-workers or neighbors; save that shit for your family and friends. People at work do not want to hear about how you feel!

People at work don't want to hear about your bodily functions or lack thereof. I don't want to hear of your miscarriage any more than I want to hear about how a dinner at the Mexican buffet gave you the screaming shits.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
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I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."

".... I feel exactly the same. I lost my baby 3 weeks ago at 18 weeks and my sister in law got pregnant 2 months after me. she is about 11 weeks now and I am terrified of seeing her we both have 3 boys and I am 40 and she is 36 and swore she didn't want anymore, but after I got pregnant she did. So now when the baby comes in October I don't know what I am going to do and if she has a girl the family will be overjoyed cause we all have boys and that will be another slam for me. I just can't try again I am terrified , I feel I am 40 and have to many things against me I just can't go through this again, ever

I never wish this on anyone, but right now I can't be happy for anyone, i feel such sadness....."



:Violin My God! These selfish moos are everywhere!

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If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!

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kidlesskim

Stupid moo:
(I'm adopted so my mother's no help since she has never even been pregnant, nor would she like to help in the first place)

For some reason, the above quote pissed me off almost more than anything else. Her moo ADOPTED her, which is IMO a more worthy thing to do than starting a selfish loaf-shitting campaign in the first place... and she completely dismisses her for that very reason. What a vile, thoughtless bitch she is - no wonder her adoptive moo isn't overly interested in her pathetic whinging.

fuck

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bizzylizzy

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kidlesskim

Stupid moo:
(I'm adopted so my mother's no help since she has never even been pregnant, nor would she like to help in the first place)

For some reason, the above quote pissed me off almost more than anything else. Her moo ADOPTED her, which is IMO a more worthy thing to do than starting a selfish loaf-shitting campaign in the first place... and she completely dismisses her for that very reason. What a vile, thoughtless bitch she is - no wonder her adoptive moo isn't overly interested in her pathetic whinging.

fuck

That statement pissed me off as well. It's like I have always thought and said regarding loaf sluicing moo-cunts. They feel superior over women who haven't shat an actual loaf! Even her OWN mother isn't as good as she is because she adopted, rather than drop one out her coot shoot. I find this mindset VERY offensive and I ain't even a childed person with an adopted kid! The NERVE of these bitches to dismiss women who have chosen to selflessly adopt.mob

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If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!

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No one has called, no one asks about me, and I don't get invited to any family function.

This,and all the other things she's bitching about, are simply because she is en over-emotional nutcase and no one wants to be near her. It's awkward when the dumb cow turns every single conversation back to her dead clump, bawls for no reason, looks angrily at other people with kids...no one talks to her or invites her anywhere because they don't want to have to deal with the crazy.