"I always disliked kids but I knew I would be very upset if I didn't have one"

Moomie has kids despite hating them because it was her duty to have grandbabies because he sister wasn't having them
http://imgur.com/e7VnIo3

https://i.imgur.com/yemYIbU.png

Unsurprisingly she gets a bad case of PPD (read buyer's remorse)

https://i.imgur.com/fKtvOC4.png
She also says her life has been miserable ever since she had a child (So much for children being a blessing)

https://i.imgur.com/cBpLDoT.png
https://i.imgur.com/eb0Nlb6.png
Why do I smell a PNA in the near future?

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clueless whiner
I'd always disliked children

There is nothing wrong with liking or disliking children. It is no different than disliking dogs, DisneyWorld, cabbage, the Easter Bunny, etc.

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clueless whiner
I knew I'd be upset if I didn't have children someday

Here we start to see the potential for a big problem because she's already stated she has always disliked children. But, this adult could still decide to use her critical thinking skills and not end up in regret.

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clueless whiner
Muy mahm can bratsit! Free bratcare!

I paraphrased this quote. We all know what happens to those promises made before gestation. They're about as dependable as the promises made before sex. The only dependable village is the one you pay for. Even the childfree know this, as long as they're over 25. Ever have someone flake out on you that was going to help you move? Give you a ride somewhere - why do you think Uber is such a huge business?

Were you always dependable and thought the sentiment would be returned yet you ended up being disappointed? If you have difficulty getting friends/family to help you out as a one-off, what are they going to do when you need weekly or daily support?

Even the best intentions can go sideways quickly. What happens when your mom has to work instead of being your bratcare constant sanctuary? Or she is ill, helping out ill relatives, etc.? Or she has to greatly limit her care because it is too much for her to handle?

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clueless whiner
Wahhhh I regret having children and hate my life....what do I do now?

I paraphrased this quote. Critical thinking skills not used. At least three lives affected negatively.

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clueless whiner
Doctor says lots of women have PPD.

I paraphrased this quote too. PPD is freaking regret. Doctors have simply found a way to legitimize and monetize this condition. There has been a huge upsurge in medical "conditions" where a person cannot deal with reality and wants to be doped up. Sadly, some parunts have their own kids doped up because they can't deal with kids being kids. I'm not talking about legitimate medical/mental conditions, I'm referring to the bullshit ones.

I've seen some men recently swearing up and down they also have PPD despite not gestating the bundle of joy. Again, regret..regret...regret...
https://qz.com/men-fathers-ppd-family-leave-1850895404
https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/19/well/mind/men-postpartum-depression.html

Why would you be upset not having something you strongly dislike? It's me not getting liver and lima beans for dinner. I'm kind of happy I don't have to choose that for my meals. I can opt for something else that won't make me want to hurl. The logic here eludes me. I also think that a lot of this PPD is definitely regret. I'm sure there are some cases where hormones come into play but I suspect the majority of moos shat it out and then realized that was a terrible mistake.

If this really is about giving her parents grandloaves, maybe she can dump it off with them and tell them to raise it.

At least if I buy something I don't like, I can return it with the receipt. You can't do that with loaves. It's a huge commitment and it's not all romantic unicorn farts like moos like to say it is to convince the rest of us.

I imagine the hormone "crash" after sluicing can fuck with a woman's mood. I don't know how quickly a lady's hormone levels return to normal once the loaf is out of her body, but I have heard more than one woman say they experienced a sense of sadness or regret following an abortion that was most likely caused by their hormones dropping to zero quickly, even if they 100 percent knew they wanted to abort or absolutely did not want kids in the slightest.

Or just feeling overwhelmed with an infant - especially if it's the woman's first child. I can see that causing a sense of depression, particularly when paired with getting absolutely no sleep for months because of the loaf's constant screaming. There is a reason sleep deprivation is used as a form of torture - because it's effective.

But these women who have PPD for years? That's just plain old depression and regret from making shitty life choices. However, they couldn't call it regret because then people would think badly of them for wishing their precious miracles were never born, so they have to give it a clinical name to make it sound like a disorder, which is much more acceptable. When tons of women experience it, it makes it much easier to call it a sickness because there is power in numbers. Maybe women who don't get depressed after crapping out a loaf should be the ones with a disorder since that seems to be a much more abnormal reaction. Like post-partum elation? Actually, that does sound like a mental disorder.

And I have also heard about men who claim to experience PPD as well. I bet that absolutely burns the asses of the mommies who feel they are the only ones who "deserve" to claim PPD because they're the ones who got pregnant and gave birth. Again, can't very well call it what it is (buyer's remorse), and since the term "post-partum depression' exists and kind of applies, just use that! Maybe men should have their own name for it, like paternal onset depression.

This Moo made one of the biggest mistakes: having children for someone else. Whether it's for a spouse or a grandparent, having a kid you do not want to please someone else is always a mistake and you will regret it 100 percent of the time.

Too many people won't admit out loud or to themselves they don't like kids, so they literally don't know it and grudgingly just have kids bcz that's what you do.

Even if you are in a room with CL people, they all get uncomfortable looks on their faces, even if you say something even slightly disagreeable about a random kid or kids in general (kids don't even need to be present). Now, if they solely disagreed w/ you, they might politely pipe up and voice that, but they get uncomfortable, which tells me it is a given that the situation sucks but they refuse to talk about it, they can't believe someone said what they think out loud. We as a society put ourselves in this position, so we keep on mindlessly reproducing. Also, people are emotionally involved in their own childhoods, so they feel like they are hating on themselves if they admit to themselves they hate kyds.

Stories like this absolutely amaze me and not in a good way.

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I paraphrased this quote. We all know what happens to those promises made before gestation. They're about as dependable as the promises made before sex. The only dependable village is the one you pay for. Even the childfree know this, as long as they're over 25. Ever have someone flake out on you that was going to help you move? Give you a ride somewhere - why do you think Uber is such a huge business?

I lived in the Bible Belt between age 15 and 31. The pressure to Breed was intense. So many people telling women they are not nachural if they don't have kids and it's their duty as humans to breed. I always thought, what is it to these people? Nothing. Not their body, not their marriage, not their life. I'm particularly incensed when an older male tells a younger woman how great it all is. As if he would know.

When people are mismatched and one wants kids and the other does not, I don't think there is any way to "turn" the people who want them because most people are irrational when it comes to kids.

But this woman baffles me. I'm glad this page exists and I'm glad the "I regret having children" group exists on FB because it may keep fence sitters from fucking their lives up.

I'm perplexed why this woman's brain cells just couldn't make the connection. Earth isn't going to fall of its axis if you don't breed. If your parents are Breeder Brains, you may get some grief, but guess what? They cannot really help YOU. It's YOUR BODY and you are going to be stuck with a kid you don't like and don't want, just like this ninny.

CF people have functioning bullshit meters and most of us are pretty stubborn. I know I was.

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mumofsixbirds
Why would you be upset not having something you strongly dislike? It's me not getting liver and lima beans for dinner. I'm kind of happy I don't have to choose that for my meals. I can opt for something else that won't make me want to hurl. The logic here eludes me. I also think that a lot of this PPD is definitely regret. I'm sure there are some cases where hormones come into play but I suspect the majority of moos shat it out and then realized that was a terrible mistake.

If this really is about giving her parents grandloaves, maybe she can dump it off with them and tell them to raise it.

At least if I buy something I don't like, I can return it with the receipt. You can't do that with loaves. It's a huge commitment and it's not all romantic unicorn farts like moos like to say it is to convince the rest of us.

It gets even better: https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce/comments/11yz3vi/divorce_ending_and_feeling_grateful/
She just got divorced, became a single mom . She barely even gets child support. In other words she can't even make meet and is stuck with a brat forever. I bet she will start to eventually resent the kid

Hopefully the brat goes no-contact.

+++++++++++++

Passive Aggressive
Master Of Anti-brat
Excuses!

I know all these alphabet soup conditions are real. What I am seeing, as with many of the professional whining victim groups, it is increasingly being used as a defense to get away with heinous, despicable, and downright evil acts. From driving drunks to road rage murders. I think people are starting to get fed up.. I know I am.

And like the phony rape, abuse charges, when there is a REAL problem, people now just tend to 'ho hum, another phony'..

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.

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bell_flower
I lived in the Bible Belt between age 15 and 31. The pressure to Breed was intense. So many people telling women they are not nachural if they don't have kids and it's their duty as humans to breed. I always thought, what is it to these people? Nothing. Not their body, not their marriage, not their life. I'm particularly incensed when an older male tells a younger woman how great it all is. As if he would know.

When people are mismatched and one wants kids and the other does not, I don't think there is any way to "turn" the people who want them because most people are irrational when it comes to kids.

CF people have functioning bullshit meters and most of us are pretty stubborn. I know I was.

The sad part is that this happens all over the country and is definitely not limited to the Bible Belt even though it is much worse there. They may not preach to the "duty" to breed outside of the Bible Belt but lots of people will try to guilt a woman into keeping the baybee by using other tactics. One that is especially persistent is bragging about how much joy their brats bring them and responding to a woman who has stated she is childfree and telling her she is missing out. Or men who talk about how responsible, or how much their career has progressed since having brats even though they never mention that there is a woman at home doing the grunt work.

I don't like it either when an older male tries to tell a younger woman how great breeding is. He didn't gestate and I highly doubt he'd be honest with just how involved he is in the brat rearing. Also, breeders lie to look good just like some breed simply to keep up with appearances. Ted Bundy had a child AND volunteered, so neither of these legitimize or make a person "good" or "acceptable" in my eyes. And if Ted Bundy wasn't already in prison when his daughter was born I highly doubt he would have prioritized her over his need to kill. I also don't like being around men who think women are put on this planet to serve them and that they have some sort of right to impose on women. Unfortunately I've experienced this all over the country.

It makes me very glad we have a strong police state in this country, otherwise it would end up being the biggest bully men who would run everything and bully women and men who aren't assholes. And you know it bugs the hell out of these bullies that anyone they perceive as "lesser than" was able to make a conscious decision to abstain from breeding because they bred.

Some women play into this dynamic by following around their husbands/significant others like little puppy dogs. It is very possible that some of these men have milquetoast wives that humor them through everything so they feel empowered to treat all women badly thinking they're just like their wives.

I think LOTS of people would have children if they could come and go as they pleased, only see their kids when they are in the mood, well-feed, well-rested and not preoccupied. And only at times that the kids are also perfectly behaved, well-feed, well-rested. Stroll into the room where the kids' eyes inevitably light up the minute they see the parent and the parent always cash flush and bearing gifts, a great kid dessert, etc. or something the children will be thrilled to have. Only good times, giggles, great wishes, fun and parties. Only great memories to share and think of or brag to others about. Photos worthy of social media and one adorable moment after another. There are parunts who are perfectly happy being the "good cop" only and relegating their spouse to be the "bad cop."

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twocents
I know all these alphabet soup conditions are real. What I am seeing, as with many of the professional whining victim groups, it is increasingly being used as a defense to get away with heinous, despicable, and downright evil acts. From driving drunks to road rage murders. I think people are starting to get fed up.. I know I am.

And like the phony rape, abuse charges, when there is a REAL problem, people now just tend to 'ho hum, another phony'..

There is such a twisted irony in this. A legitimate BS condition is legitimate because "diagnosis" and real problems are just "in your head." Ever had a doctor refuse to run a blood test that would confirm a diagnosable condition but offer you antidepressants even though the doctor is not a shrink?

Rape is hugely difficult to prove and convict in court. And if the person isn't convicted, what kind of life is there for the alleged victim?

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cfuter
Too many people won't admit out loud or to themselves they don't like kids, so they literally don't know it and grudgingly just have kids bcz that's what you do.

Even if you are in a room with CL people, they all get uncomfortable looks on their faces, even if you say something even slightly disagreeable about a random kid or kids in general (kids don't even need to be present). Now, if they solely disagreed w/ you, they might politely pipe up and voice that, but they get uncomfortable, which tells me it is a given that the situation sucks but they refuse to talk about it, they can't believe someone said what they think out loud. We as a society put ourselves in this position, so we keep on mindlessly reproducing. Also, people are emotionally involved in their own childhoods, so they feel like they are hating on themselves if they admit to themselves they hate kyds.

CL people can be some of the most pro-kid people on the planet. They haven't had to face any realities like parents have and they (sometimes desperately) want kids. Having kids is just a big romance to the CL people. Some of them have been obsessing about having kids for ten to twenty plus years. They'd probably talk with anyone for hours about kids.

I do think it is weird that there are many CL people. I've known plenty of great men who my main deal-breaker on was having kids.

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freya
I think LOTS of people would have children if they could come and go as they pleased, only see their kids when they are in the mood, well-feed, well-rested and not preoccupied. And only at times that the kids are also perfectly behaved, well-feed, well-rested. Stroll into the room where the kids' eyes inevitably light up the minute they see the parent and the parent always cash flush and bearing gifts, a great kid dessert, etc. or something the children will be thrilled to have. Only good times, giggles, great wishes, fun and parties. Only great memories to share and think of or brag to others about. Photos worthy of social media and one adorable moment after another. There are parunts who are perfectly happy being the "good cop" only and relegating their spouse to be the "bad cop."

That's how it is for a lot of Duhs. They pick and choose when to see their own sprogs and can swoop in and be a Disney dad/the fun parent whenever they choose while Moo is the mean bitch that says no to everything, imposes rules and boundaries and doles out punishments. There's a reason why a lot of kids will scream for Daddy - he's the fun one who is often much more lax about rules compared to Mommy because he doesn't have to deal with the fallout of the brats not following rules and routines. Plus if a man does anything at all with his kid, he's put on a pedestal and worshipped like a deity. Meanwhile, Moos will get crucified if they dare feed their kids formula instead of letting them starve due to insufficient milk supply. There is something someone on breakingmom said that I do agree with: it takes very little to be a good father, and very little to be a bad mother.

And this arrangement works out swell for the men because they can just be fathers whenever they feel like it and do the bare minimum and continue to go out and have lives and hobbies. Meanwhile, the mothers are stuck doing all the behind the scenes shit and picking up all the slack and doing damage control when the Duhs fuck something up, like letting the kid stay up all night or letting them watch scary movies.

Moo claims to love her sprog but admits to hating being a mom. She was also essentially a single moo long before she divorced her Manchild husband and outright stated that having kids is what caused their relationship to go to shit: https://ibb.co/album/YDzWcG