female serial breeders and multiple sperm donors

via dr helens blog to this link

http://www.pajamasmedia.com/2007/07/ask_dr_helen_doing_unto_others.php

this is just focused on the serial breeders.. but its and interesting thing and i think explains a lot about these kind of women, (i know she hasnt mentioned men in the equation that doesnt mean she just blames the woman. this is more a specific comment about that kind of male..)


Today the topic is self-interest, first as it relates to certain male/female relationships and then as it relates to altruism. David emails the first question:

Dr. Helen,


Can you explain to me how the guy in Ohio who is alleged to have killed his pregnant girlfriend has managed to impregnate at least 4 different women, none of who he appears to have been married to at the time? As a guy I just cannot imagine a woman wanting to sleep with a creep who is a serial sperm donor. Do they have no self-respect?

dr helens comments..

Some women who like these sorts of guys may have too little self-respect, too much or a combination of both. What do I mean by this? The common reason people come up with when women hook up with men who are trouble—such as prisoners—is that the woman herself has some type of low self-esteem. It’s possible, of course. She may not have gotten enough nurturing and admiration from a father figure and has been desperately seeking that acceptance ever since, yada yada yada. Or it actually could be that she has too much self-esteem, that is, she sees herself as the “special one” who will rescue this troubled guy and help him rise above his sorry ways and she can feel special and altruistic about the part she played in his redemption. She may actually crave the excitement of the chase in the same way that a man chases after the unavailable woman who ignores him.

Or perhaps it is some combination of low self-esteem on the part of the woman who feels she doesn’t quite measure up and yet, if she gets this man who has shown himself to be a serial breeder to want to be with just her, she will feel that she is the winner she thinks that she should be deep down.

Of course, it could be that the chase of the serial sperm donor is less about getting the man and more about beating the competition. It is in the woman’s self-interest to get the guy to commit to her, even if she does not really want him. Why? Because she can then feel that she has beaten out the other women vying for this guy’s attention and won the challenge. My guess is that if he did commit to her, she might not want him for long.

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I just post the stories, for interest.. for everyone

Lord, what fools these mortals be!
- A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Act III, Scene ii

Voltaire said: "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."

H.L.Mencken wrote:"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. Albert Einstein

Although I've never wanted kids, I STILL WOULD NOT do the egg donor thing for any amount of money.

Why would I want someone else to be responsible for a living breathing product of my DNA? They'd only fuck it up anyway.

And besides which, who knows if this kid's going to show up on your doorstep later??? Is there any sort of law to protect egg/sperm donors from some kid who wants to meet mommy or daddy?

(that said: if I ever accidentally got pregnant and gave the kid up for adoption, I'd explore as much as I could to have the records PERMANENTLY sealed so the kid could never find out who I was and show up expecting me to give them big hugs and kisses and make them a part of my life and play second mommy. I'd leave the medical history and stuff like that open, but why the hell would I want the kid to disrupt my life AGAIN 18 years later???)

actually in the uk any child can go find his father, and or mother.. i mean just turn up on the doorstep.. and here that man is them liable for 18 years child support..

*********************************************************************************************************************************
I just post the stories, for interest.. for everyone

Lord, what fools these mortals be!
- A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Act III, Scene ii

Voltaire said: "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."

H.L.Mencken wrote:"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. Albert Einstein