Single Parents Dating Disasters

Well, here are some of my "favorite" gems...
"I had my 12-year-old daughter living with me, it was hard to carve out time to meet him. We finally met for coffee, but I couldn’t find a sitter — and didn’t want to leave my daughter home alone — so I brought her along."
I'm sorry, but since when have 12 year olds been unable to care for themselves? Jeez, my parent's started leaving me at home alone when I was 6, and I know my friends stopped having sitters once they reached the double digits.

"my daughter announced that she was studying for a science test. My new friend insisted on testing her. She demurred at first, but he was determined to get in good with her. He asked her what the test was on, and she told him it was all about sex hormones. I spent the rest of the date squirming behind my latte as he quizzed her"
So you haven't talked to your 12 year old about sex yet? Really? You were squirming at the scientific sex quiz that you allowed to continue? What kind of spineless,naive boob are you?! If you didn't like it, say "Lets change the subject". I hope she has fun being a grandmother in a year.

"one of my daughters stared at my date and said, ‘Boy, you look funny.’ My other daughter promptly chimed in with, ‘Hey, you smell funny, too.’ I glared at them and looked at my date with a smile and an apologetic, ‘Kids, you gotta love them!’ Then I grabbed my stuff and hustled him out the door—I wanted to get him out of there before another word was said. As the door shut, I could hear the giggles and the stampeding of feet as the kids rushed to the closest window. On our way to dinner, I apologized and tried to tell my date that the kids didn’t really mean it, but the damage was done!”"
Well DUH! You showed your date that you have no control over your childen, and no desire to teach them manners. Really, that makes you look like a lazy fool who simply can't figure out the basics of birth control, and no one wants that mess.

"As I was talking away, I was cutting my date’s steak into tiny little bite-sized pieces, just as I do for my son every single night. Needless to say, he never asked me out again!”
Again, DUH! If you are on ADULT TIME then you do ADULT THINGS and if you can't tell the difference between ADULTS and CHILDREN then you probably won't get to do too much ADULT STUFF.

Feh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> "As I was talking away, I was cutting my date’s
> steak into tiny little bite-sized pieces, just as
> I do for my son every single night. Needless to
> say, he never asked me out again!”
>
lol! I can just imagine the sparkling adult dinner conversation that went on as she talked away cutting his steak. I can't believe he didn't grab the knife & stick it in his eye for relief.

I thought the single mother cutting the steak for the date as if he was a tiny tot was bad. The date quizzing the 12/year-old re: sex hormones was more than creepy. Many single mothers with pre-teen or teen girls will get a man's interest because he often wants to molest the female children. That is a known fact.

Where the hell was the single moo's sense when this ass was getting off on asking the girl about sex hormones? She should have told the "date" how that sort of study help was OFF limits as he did not know the child well enough and was not a relative where this would be even remotely acceptable. Then...the damned woman should have told the man to leave and make it clear that there will be no further communication. I guess the thought of being manless was worse than a creep questioning her pre-teen daughter about sexuality...even though it was for her class.

I know...I am rambling....

from what i read, he asked to help, then he discovered its sex hormones, he may have been embarrassed, but. he did try to help her.

"my daughter announced that she was studying for a science test. My new friend insisted on testing her. She demurred at first, but he was determined to get in good with her. He asked her what the test was on, and she told him it was all about sex hormones"..

so science test, then he said i will help you, before he knew what it was, she didnt want too because she was embarrassed, then he discovered it was about sex hormones.

nothing in that read like he was wanting to talk about sex to her. would it be better for her male teacher to ask the same things for a test. or a male student. i can talk about many topics, does that mean i cant help someone if their study leads them to sex.

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I just post the stories, for interest.. for everyone

Lord, what fools these mortals be!
- A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Act III, Scene ii

Voltaire said: "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."

H.L.Mencken wrote:"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. Albert Einstein

I agree with Mercurior on this one. I figured that he just switched into "teacher mode", the same way the woman automatically switched into "mom mode" and started cutting her date's meat. Besides, she's already learning it school -- and it's not like he was randomly starting a conversation about sex, he's just discussing biological processes.

The most disturbing thing in the sex quiz scenario to me was the mother's discomfort with the discussion of the basic biological processes of sex. A. She's already experienced it herself, so it's not like it's all new and scary to her. Hell, she's out on a date, which means she would like to have sex with another man eventually.
B. She's sending her daughter a really bad message that discussions of sex are embarassing and bad, making it less likely her daughter will be comfortable asking her questions about sex, or any future partners questions about their sexual health history.
C.Her kid is already learning it in school, she should be supporting it.
D. Again, if her daughter isn't able to stay home alone at the age of 12, they have much deeper issues beyond a little discomfort with sexual discussions.
E. If it was really THAT BAD, she should have been able to put a stop to it instead of sitting there like a frightened baby sheep.

Amethusos said, "Many single mothers with pre-teen or teen girls will get a man's interest because he often wants to molest the female children."

This seems to paint many men as child molesters. Most aren't. In general, chyldren are far more at risk from people known to the family than from some stranger the mother picks up for a date. The kyds might be more at risk from a new live-in boyfriend or stepfather, but molestation still isn't as common as the media portray. The left-wing media seem to have adopted the extremist feminist position that calls all men rapists and molesters, and have succeeded in sowing distrust of all men.

My brother's elderly mother-in-law actually made such an accusation against him when he married a woman who already had two young daughters. The MIL told my mother on the phone when she called to introduce herself that she thought the reason he wanted to marry her daughter was to molest the girls. She has never apologized for this, and my brother has a daughter of his own from a previous relationship. Needless to say, this kind of stupid comment grossly offended him, his wife (her daughter), and my mother, yet the MIL never has apologized for making it. (The MIL and her daughter do not get along anyway.)

The problem is that such statements get innocent men unjustly in trouble. On a number of men's rights forums the word is to avoid dating or having any relationships with single mothers like the plague, and one of the primary reasons is the possibility that the moo could falsely claim child molestation after a fight or breakup. (This is also a common strategy against husbands in divorce court, despite a lack of evidence in the overwhelming majority of cases. The goal is usually to keep the ex-husband from being able to see his own children, despite hefty child support.) That might be a source of the attitude that Amethusos expresses.

Likewise, for these and other reasons, the general attitude on the men's rights forums is not to have children anyway. As so many here point out, the "joy" of having kyds is overblown, and chyldren can lead to massive debt, heartbreak, and legal trouble.

Not all men are predators, k-man. There are good ones who do marry single moms and take on the kids as their own. However, it seems that most of the molestations happen in single mother households where the new boyfriend has committed such a crime. These women do not care what kind of criminals they bring home as long as they have a man around. A decent man is smart to avoid the single moos due to false accusations after a break-up just as a man is smart to avoid sex with co-workers because I have heard the false accusations of "sexual harassment" when the fling ended or the female was fired for cause re: other issues.

exactly when i was last in america there was a woman with 3 kids staying there as a freind of rowans father, and even though the mother was right there, i became nervous. she had to be lifted in and out of his truck, and only i could.. and i was nervous..

a lot of men are terrified, in touching, or helping children.. theres stories about a man driving along sees a 3 year old child and doesnt stop incase he was thought to be a pedophile, the kid later drowns by accident.. and how do you think he felt.. should he have stopped and been persecuted, or drive on and feel guilty for the rest of his life..

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I just post the stories, for interest.. for everyone

Lord, what fools these mortals be!
- A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Act III, Scene ii

Voltaire said: "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."

H.L.Mencken wrote:"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. Albert Einstein

I'll push down a kid before I help one in public, or at least just stand and watch as it injures itself in front of it's inattentive parents. I gave up babysitting years ago, and refuse live in the "village it takes to raise a child", at least until those children start paying taxes to support my life choices once in a while.

Raise your own kid and you won't have to worry about the "helpful" village pedophile. Better yet, think seriously before breeding...chances are you'll decide not to.

Mercurior, your latest post reminded me of a single moo co-worker who told me how her two sons beat each other up...and THEN lied to the police saying their moo's live-in boyfriend did it. He ended up in jail. This is one more reason why men should never date single mothers even if they do not have daughters but sons.

but isnt it a bad reflection on society that people are treated this way. quite a bit of the problem is the hysteria, that surrounded certain stories,

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I just post the stories, for interest.. for everyone

Lord, what fools these mortals be!
- A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Act III, Scene ii

Voltaire said: "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."

H.L.Mencken wrote:"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. Albert Einstein

Dating a single moo with kids is a nightmare, from what it seems. Dating men with kids is almost as bad because the ex-wife still think she's got her thumb over the man, just because she has her hand in his wallet.

SO is in the process of emancipating his 2 kids now - ages 21.5 and 18.5 - gee, it's about time. Needless to say, there is much kicking and screaming by the ex because the gravy train is now done. The 21.5 year old thinks that because she's "still a student" and will be for the rest of her life, that daddy should continue sending money for her every month. Entitlement-minded, anyone?

In some states duh might still get to pay child support for his kyds as long as they remain at university, or up to an age limit of 22-24. So the 21.5- and 18.5-year-olds just might still be legally "entitled" to duh's $$$. Also, in some states the noncustodial parent might be on the hook for part of the university expenses as well. Entitled, indeed.

KidFreeLuvnLife, noncustodial parents (usually the fathers) all too often get the short end of the stick from family courts over child support and expenses—as you have undoubtedly found out with your SO.