and before anyone says anything its humorous in the british way.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/men/article3883503.ece
Saturday. 7.30am. Baby is in the highchair. I’m kneeling on the floor picking up rusks. I sing one of my favourite Killers lines to her:
“You’ve got soul, but you’re not a soldier.” You may object that these aren’t quite the correct words, but that’s one of the pleasures of babies: you can say whatever you want. (One of the pains is hearing other people doing the same thing.)
My daughters are listening. “Babies are not good soldiers,” says Cassady, 4, the mad, lisping one. “They are too small to hold the guns.”
“That is why they are good,” says Grace, 6, a classic older sister. She is a barrister, always waiting to demolish all arguments. “Babies can dodge the bullets. And also, they are good at spying, because they can crawl through windows.”
A row breaks out over babies’ suitability for combat. Babies sometimes have sauce all round their faces, argues Grace, so they wouldn’t mind wearing camouflage. And they look sweet, so people might pick them up, then the babies could shoot them.
“Babies must not have guns,” Cassady insists. She has conceded some ground, but about this she is absolutely firm. I’m considering intervening, but I’ve been reading Affluenza, in which Oliver James argues that we would all be happier if we listened more to the playful logic of children.
I sing the Killers line again. Once you have started singing it, it is quite hard to stop.
“Daddy,” asks Cassady, “do you know what is a soul?”
“Ah,” says Grace. “It’s on the end of your leg.”
“I do not have a soul on my leg,” says Cass. “You do!” says Grace. “It’s underneath your foot.” “That is not a soul. I will tell you what is a soul.”
Cassady went to a religious school for a year, so this is one of her areas of expertise.
“You know you have a body,” she says, “what can eat and what can pinch. But you have another body, what does not eat and does not pinch. It’s just a ghost and it lives for ever.”
Her big sister is taken aback by the theological display. “But who has a soul?” she says.
“Everyone,” the scholar replies. “Babies and grannies and everyone.”
“So, can souls be soldiers? Because if they’re ghosts, they could go through walls.”
“Souls are not soldiers,” shouts Cassady. Like many religious people, she is furiously zealous about her standpoint. “And babies must not be soldiers. If they see guns, they thuck them, and you must not thuck guns.”
After that, I glaze over. If Oliver James wants to hear more of their wit, he is welcome to come and do breakfast. I am confused
http://www.andrewclover.com/
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I just post the stories, for interest.. for everyone
Lord, what fools these mortals be!
- A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Act III, Scene ii
Voltaire said: "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."
H.L.Mencken wrote:"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.â€
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. Albert Einstein