Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 09, 2015 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,199 |
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In an age of DNA, when biological relationships can be identified with certainty, it can seem absurd to hew so closely to a centuries-old idea of paternity. And yet basing paternity decisions solely on genetics places the nonbiological father’s welfare above the child’s.
Anonymous User
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 09, 2015 |
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 09, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,975 |
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 09, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,701 |
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 10, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,308 |
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Peace
I remember reading this article when it came out.
It's all about the money. It's easier for the state to go after the guy who stuck around and has the $$$$$ then go after the real sperm donor. The state doesn't care who pays the bill, as long as it's not the state coffer.
Good people of Bratfree, this will never be us
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 10, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 7,757 |
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StudioFiftyFour
Of course I warn my fellow males and place great emphasis on the need to use condoms and to avoid single mothers who are quite possibly trying to get knocked up again to earn another meal ticket.
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 10, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,308 |
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thom_c
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StudioFiftyFour
Of course I warn my fellow males and place great emphasis on the need to use condoms and to avoid single mothers who are quite possibly trying to get knocked up again to earn another meal ticket.
A dry bone supports nothing.
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 10, 2015 | Registered: 8 years ago Posts: 197 |
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 10, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 7,835 |
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videogamesforeverkidsnever
"The state's interest in getting somebody... anybody... to pay is immoral. It's the equivalent of throwing a random, innocent man in jail for a crime instead of trying to catch the guy who actually committed the crime.
I propose that EVERY infant be given a DNA test to determine paternity. Guys who knock the women up can pay the penalty, while innocent guys would not be obliged. And keep in mind there are quite a few white knights who could (and do) volunteer to pay for children who are not theirs. I think they're total suckers and fucking idiots, but if they want to pay for other guy's kids, that's their choice to make. I've got no problem with it. What would be the harm in having mandatory DNA tests?"
Reminds me of this poor fellow, even though the brat is his: http://drphil.com/slideshows/slideshow/4701/?id=4701&showID=1150
He was forced to provide for a biological child he never wanted -- he made it crystal clear beforehand that he was not ready to be a dad -- and his ex told him she was on birth control (for other reasons) and also had a condition that made her unable to get pregnant.
Well, she got knocked up anyway, and he was forced to provide financially.
I'm on the poor dude's side 100%.
When you're in a relationship with someone, you tend to trust your mate, so he rightfully assumed she couldn't reproduce.
Maybe she herself didn't know she could get pregnant either -- I'm not saying there was deceit on her end -- but I still don't believe he should be made to pay for a brat he made clear was unwanted before it was even conceived.
JMO.
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 10, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,308 |
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videogamesforeverkidsnever
Reminds me of this poor fellow, even though the brat is his: http://drphil.com/slideshows/slideshow/4701/?id=4701&showID=1150
He was forced to provide for a biological child he never wanted -- he made it crystal clear beforehand that he was not ready to be a dad -- and his ex told him she was on birth control and also had a condition that made her unable to get pregnant.
Well, she got knocked up anyway, and he was forced to provide financially.
I'm on the poor dude's side 100%.
When you're in a relationship with someone, you tend to trust your mate, so he rightfully assumed she couldn't reproduce.
Maybe she herself didn't know she could get pregnant either -- I'm not saying there was deceit on her end -- but I still don't believe he should bye made to pay for a brat he made clear was unwanted before it was even conceived.
JMO.
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 10, 2015 | Registered: 8 years ago Posts: 197 |
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mumofsixbirds
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videogamesforeverkidsnever
"The state's interest in getting somebody... anybody... to pay is immoral. It's the equivalent of throwing a random, innocent man in jail for a crime instead of trying to catch the guy who actually committed the crime.
I propose that EVERY infant be given a DNA test to determine paternity. Guys who knock the women up can pay the penalty, while innocent guys would not be obliged. And keep in mind there are quite a few white knights who could (and do) volunteer to pay for children who are not theirs. I think they're total suckers and fucking idiots, but if they want to pay for other guy's kids, that's their choice to make. I've got no problem with it. What would be the harm in having mandatory DNA tests?"
Reminds me of this poor fellow, even though the brat is his: http://drphil.com/slideshows/slideshow/4701/?id=4701&showID=1150
He was forced to provide for a biological child he never wanted -- he made it crystal clear beforehand that he was not ready to be a dad -- and his ex told him she was on birth control (for other reasons) and also had a condition that made her unable to get pregnant.
Well, she got knocked up anyway, and he was forced to provide financially.
I'm on the poor dude's side 100%.
When you're in a relationship with someone, you tend to trust your mate, so he rightfully assumed she couldn't reproduce.
Maybe she herself didn't know she could get pregnant either -- I'm not trying to say there was deceit on her end -- but I still don't believe he should be made to pay for a brat he made clear was unwanted before it was even conceived.
JMO.
If not him who pays, then who? The state? I feel bad for him too, but maybe he shoulda wrapped it up or gotten a vasectomy just to be SURE he didn't knock her up.
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 10, 2015 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 1,788 |
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 10, 2015 | Registered: 15 years ago Posts: 1,109 |
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 10, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,308 |
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evilchildlessbitch
All a man has to do is request a paternity test. If he is too big a pussy to tell his wife or girlfriend he thinks she's screwing around I have no pity. In spite of the myth, a woman can't just "put" a man on a birth certificate. The man has to sign the birth certificate.
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 10, 2015 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,199 |
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He shouldn't have to request anything. A paternity test should just be part and parcel of what happens with any birth. I'm not sure what good reasons there are to oppose this sort of thing becoming de jure policy.
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 10, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,308 |
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bell_flower
I'm of two minds on this. On the one hand I can see where the state would have a compelling interest to make sure someone isn't saddled with paying for a child that isn't his.
HOWEVER, I'm also resentful that taxpayers are YET AGAIN paying for the products of irresponsible breeding. Let these jerks sort out their own messes. If a man thinks he's not the father, let him pay for his own test, then submit that to a court. It seems cost prohibitive that every baybee be DNA tested when in some circumstances, paternity is never in question and never will be questioned.
"family court" is another example where we as a society TAKE IT UP THE ASS to pay for
----couples who got married and then changed their mind and are sparring over their DNA products and custody and counselors. Their cases clog up the courts with custody battles, custody enforcement, etc, all because they HAD TO BREED with partners who were likely unsuitable in the first place.
---child protective services: to take care of the kids that losers crank out. Think of all the wasted dollars on social workers, bullshit parenting classes for people who will never be fit parents, the cost and time spent by law enforcement tracking down parents who are abusing their kids, documenting the abuse, having to house these kids and find new homes for them, all because Mummy and Duhddy's reproductive organs worked when their brains did not.
It kills me to hear assholes pontificating that childfree people are a drain on society. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? All I do is pay and pay for other peoples' kyds and their resultant problems.
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 10, 2015 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 606 |
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 11, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 12,434 |
Anonymous User
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 11, 2015 |
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 11, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,701 |
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 11, 2015 | Registered: 11 years ago Posts: 294 |
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 In reality, however, the requirement to cut ties often destroys the relationship by forcing men to choose between their desire for retribution and their desire to remain the child’s parent.
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“Every time he was given a chance to deny paternity, he never did,†Elliott said, according to the transcript. “He signed consent order after consent order because he wanted to be the father. The testimony here today is that he only did it because of some philanthropic belief that he wanted to step up. That’s not true. . . . He fought for every other weekend. He fought for having her overnight on a Wednesday. He fought for having her not be able to leave the jurisdiction. These aren’t things that someone does because they are just philanthropic. He wants to be the dad; he just doesn’t want to pay support.†Elliott’s accusation infuriated Mike, who believed it accurately described Rob, not him.
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 12, 2015 | Registered: 16 years ago Posts: 585 |
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mumofsixbirds
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videogamesforeverkidsnever
Reminds me of this poor fellow, even though the brat is his: http://drphil.com/slideshows/slideshow/4701/?id=4701&showID=1150
He was forced to provide for a biological child he never wanted -- he made it crystal clear beforehand that he was not ready to be a dad -- and his ex told him she was on birth control (for other reasons) and also had a condition that made her unable to get pregnant.
Well, she got knocked up anyway, and he was forced to provide financially.
I'm on the poor dude's side 100%.
When you're in a relationship with someone, you tend to trust your mate, so he rightfully assumed she couldn't reproduce.
Maybe she herself didn't know she could get pregnant either -- I'm not saying there was deceit on her end -- but I still don't believe he should be made to pay for a brat he made clear was unwanted before it was even conceived.
JMO.
If not him who pays, then who? The state? I feel bad for him too, but maybe he shoulda wrapped it up or gotten a vasectomy just to be SURE he didn't knock her up.
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 12, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,308 |
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jmc
You can't remain the child's parent but not pay any money towards the upbringing of the child. You can't have your cake and eat it too.
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 12, 2015 | Registered: 16 years ago Posts: 3,454 |
Re: Really long NYT Article about Non-Biological fathers getting stuck June 13, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 5,716 |
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Techie
In my opinion, marriage is just too great of a risk. With divorce rates being around 50%, I say it is time to look for safer options. Would anyone buy a very expensive stock with their lifelong savings if the failure rate was at 50%? Probably not. Why are so many people still getting married, I am yet to find an answer to that. I know of a small number of reasons where a marriage is a must to get certain benefits, but most of the time, there are better alternatives.