PMYABP: Back of the Couch Edition

I was out with some girlfriends last week and a friend of a friend is a second grade teacher. She was telling us that one of her students has been coming to school on some days crying. all. day. long. since the beginning of school. The kid is a product of one of those "blended families."

Her bio mom and Dud have both "moved on" from the marriage that produced her. Dud is remarried and now has THREE more kids. Her mother has remarried and has another smaller kid. The kid is in one of those "joint custody" arrangements and she goes to a different parent's house every other week. Jeebus, who thought of that brilliant idea? I'm 50+ and I would fucking hate having to move out of my house every other week, not to mention all the people this girl now has to deal with. Second grade is what, 7 years old? I found myself feeling sorry for this kid and I do not even know her.

My friends tell me these arrangements are more common now for financial reasons. If Duddies can get joint custody, the kid is with them half the time and they don't have to pay child support or it's greatly reduced. Who cares if the kid's life is disrupted, right?

The teacher in question was planning to talk with the parents again because she cannot teach the kid when she's constantly upset and it's disrupting other students too.

A one finger salute to selfish serial Breeders.

Those fucking asshole parents will probably blame the kid for being depressed and tell her she better stop crying.

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bell_flower
A one finger salute to selfish serial Breeders.

All breeders are selfish. None of them have the child's best interests in mind when they decide to breed; THEY WANT TO BE A MOMMY OR DADDY!!!, and that's all that matters.

precisely this. for all Dr Laura is hated, she has had people on that are dealing with this, the fallout from it, or angry teenagers...

L herself asked them (the so called adults) how they would like it if they had to move back and forth from house to house, and watch while moo and duh create new little crotch turds who don't have to go anywhere...

it would be very annoying.

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.

Not only all that, her education is going to be messed up if all this is not resolved soon. When you are crying in class - do not learn a thing. I was depressed all through high school and was very unprepared for college and really have not had a career because of something like this.

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mr. neptune
Not only all that, her education is going to be messed up if all this is not resolved soon. When you are crying in class - do not learn a thing. I was depressed all through high school and was very unprepared for college and really have not had a career because of something like this.

Children do not have a future anyway. Doesn't matter how hard you study, 47% of all jobs will be taken by automation. I am pro extinction of the Human race.

+++++++++++++

Passive Aggressive
Master Of Anti-brat
Excuses!

I am quite liberal, but I swear I turn into some raging fundy Christian conservative who agrees with the aforementioned Dr. Laura on these situations. I think if you are having a kid with someone you should feel guilted into marrying them and staying with them and pretending to be happy because you fucked up and made an innocent human. I don’t think single parents should date and they damn sure shouldn’t remarry and have more kids. All these fucked-up situations creating damaged people are because parents are selfish. I say this as a raging feminist who thinks meth should be legal.

It'd help if people actually put more than two seconds of thought into who they breed with before going and breeding. Seems like the norm is to have a kid with someone you barely know and then when the relationship inevitably goes to hell when the two people learn they're incompatible, the poor kid spawned from the union is the one who suffers the most. The parents will fight for custody, but 99% of the time it's not because one loves the kid more than the other. It's because neither one wants to pay child support.

And I'm sure this kid has been shoved aside in favor of the shiny new kids and when she plays musical houses, she probably gets largely ignored with the exception of being scolded and/or told to entertain her half-siblings.

Breeders will do what's in their best interests, not their children's. Blended families can sometimes work, but most of the time, they're fucking miserable for everyone involved.

Good luck to your friend's friend with her attempts to talk to the parents about this. My guess is they'll blame the other for the kid's behavior and then say it's the teacher's job to deal with the kid's crying and not theirs. Because as we all know by now, if a breeder can pass the buck, they will.

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bell_flower
My friends tell me these arrangements are more common now for financial reasons. If Duddies can get joint custody, the kid is with them half the time and they don't have to pay child support or it's greatly reduced. Who cares if the kid's life is disrupted, right?

So, it isn't about the kids..TMIJITW. The gloves come off once the word divorce is mentioned. Now duddies want joint custody so they screw over both their ex and their kid at the same time. It is bad enough for their adult ex-partner to deal with this but it is likely to cause permanent damage to their kids, who aren't mature enough/lack the life experience to deal with it. Most kids are going to internalize this, this little girl is the perfect example.

I guess getting a divorce as a parent means they can put themselves above their kids. It is so amazing to me how many people willingly screw up their kids with this kind of childish attitude.

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ondinette
Those fucking asshole parents will probably blame the kid for being depressed and tell her she better stop crying.

That, or they'll blame the teacher for not being able to fix the problem they are creating. Shit like this is part of why I quit teaching.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________
"Not every ejaculation deserves a name" - George Carlin

addon: I don't like kids but a child like this crying every day in class because of the fucked up home situation... must be horrible to be watching this and unable to do anything..

there will be a special place in hell for parents like this.

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.

Quote
bell_flower
My friends tell me these arrangements are more common now for financial reasons. If Duddies can get joint custody, the kid is with them half the time and they don't have to pay child support or it's greatly reduced. Who cares if the kid's life is disrupted, right?

And I'm sure when they do have the kid, they don't pay it a lick of attention. They just kinda put up with it so they don't have to pony up half their income to Moo for child support. Because what kid needs a stable home life and parents that love them?

It's not always the Duhs either. Sometimes the Moos are the assholes and the fathers are actually decent, but all Moo wants to do is use the kid to hurt her ex as much as possible.

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LoveToLurk
That, or they'll blame the teacher for not being able to fix the problem they are creating. Shit like this is part of why I quit teaching.

Yep, but don't you DARE question their award-winning parenting because a teacher couldn't possibly understand! Never mind the teachers probably care more about the kids than the parents do. This poor kid is probably coming to school crying every day because it's the only place she feels "safe" enough to cry. And even worse, if the teacher wanted to just hug the poor kid and let her cry so it felt like someone gave a shit about her for a second, the teacher would probably lose their job for physically touching a student.

Fuck these parents, I hope they get left to die slowly in their own filth when they get old.

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Cambion
Fuck these parents, I hope they get left to die slowly in their own filth when they get old.

A better punishment for these parents is let the child hang herself in her closet, and they will have to live with the fact they drove her to suicide.

+++++++++++++

Passive Aggressive
Master Of Anti-brat
Excuses!

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twocents
addon: I don't like kids but a child like this crying every day in class because of the fucked up home situation... must be horrible to be watching this and unable to do anything..

there will be a special place in hell for parents like this.

I sure hope there is, because yes it is horrible to watch.

Oh, and these types of parents are the ones who are hardest to get hold of and never show up for any type of conference or meeting. No shock there.

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I am quite liberal, but I swear I turn into some raging fundy Christian conservative who agrees with the aforementioned Dr. Laura on these situations.

Same here. You had a kid, you suck it up and stick around and raise him/her**. I wonder if Adam Lanza wouldn't have been such a psycho if his father had stuck round.

I do listen to her show. She can give good advice at times. My general problems with "Dr." Laura are:

0. Claimed to be CF, had a tubal ligation then reversed it.
1. general fetus-humping
2. She tends to blame females for every problem, even before she knows all the facts of a situation.
3. Always trying to hawk her books;
4. She's a hypocrite; see the Vanity Fair article.
5. Rags on women who want to work outside the home, see #4, when she herself worked outside the home. Yes, I know she claims to have worked at night while her kid was sleeping--that is still working.
6. Encourages her cult followers to be nosy, interfering busy bodies in their own families. ACTIVELY ENCOURAGES hysterical Grandmoos to harass their daughters or DILs (always the women) if they work outside the home.
7. Does the same #6 routine regarding Mawiage. I've heard her tell people not to invite family members to weddings because they are shacked up and they do not have "the proper regard for Mawiage." (Dr. Laura was divorced from her first husband and lived with #2.) Pl-ease. Marriage is a legal construct. I've known shacked-up people who are more devoted than married people. PLENTY of legally married people have managed to make a mockery out of the institution just fine--shall we not invite them either?

thread hijack off.

** ETA: If there is abuse or addiction yes I can understand why someone would want to leave a marriage and it's better for themselves and the kids. If you must get divorced and you want to hump someone, do it when your kid is not around. Do not expose your kid to a parade of Fuck Buddies, pseudo Mommies and Duddies and KEEP THEM OUT OF THE KID'S house. Too many kids are abused by fuck buddies or step parents.