Breeder admits should have spent more time around brats before having one
December 30, 2022
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breeder
I really should’ve spent more time around kids. I have no cousins, no nieces/nephews. I had no idea it would be so hard. I don’t mind the cleaning or the lack of sleep or all the wasting of food. I hate the whining, the crying.

I suspect I put more time and effort into researching my hair conditioner than the research this bint did on brats before having them.

I guess the 18+ year commitment wasn't enough to cause her to have pause. It makes me wonder if she has ever experienced buyer's remorse. I sure have. Hell, I don't want to live with a greasy head for three months, I can't even imagine the level of research needed to commit to something for 18+ years but it would be substantial.

https://www.reddit.com/r/regretfulparents/comments/zzhpkr/its_so_hard/
deliberate stupid ignorance is no excuse.

I also tend to think they don't want to know the truth

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
The hair conditioner thing made me laugh, because I'm the same way. Currently I have two kinds, one for when my hair's dried out from wind, chlorine, etc, and one for average days.

How could someone NOT KNOW about the whiny crying side of dealing with kids??? Hell, it's clear even when you're NOT dealing with them. Kids are everywhere. That's why I had figured some shit out even when I was still an immature, self-absorbed teen.
Re: Breeder admits should have spent more time around brats before having one
January 05, 2023
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randomcfchick
How could someone NOT KNOW about the whiny crying side of dealing with kids??? Hell, it's clear even when you're NOT dealing with them. Kids are everywhere. That's why I had figured some shit out even when I was still an immature, self-absorbed teen.

The way some of these idiots talk, you'd think they had never in their lives encountered a child. Even if you don't go out of your way to be around them, you can't avoid them unless you're an absolute hermit living in a bomb shelter because like you said, they are everywhere. Then these same people act absolutely floored when they go and have kids that throw fits, scream, whine, cry, soil themselves, vomit constantly, refuse to eat, refuse to sleep, break shit, hurt themselves, get sick all the time and all the other million and one horrible things brats do.

I knew kids were whiny bitches since I was a kid because I remember being a whiny bitch myself! It's not like this is some elusive behavior you have to look for on the night of a full moon after sacrificing a virgin. Go to Walmart any time on any day of the week and you will hear at least one crotch monkey screaming from clear on the other side of the store because Mommy won't buy them a crappy plastic toy and whining and moaning and doing that fake crying shit because they don't get their own way.

Must be that person didn't like the responses they got because the post got deleted.
all one has to do is go to malls, grocery stores, etc and look...

the stupidity on parade is appalling.

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
They constantly argue that the exposure here or there to brats is different when you're parunting 24x7. I say nonsense and they need to try harder. See how many days they can deal with the following on continuous loop before cracking:

1. Put the brat behavior seen in public on a loop for 24x7, and throw in some videos with brats crying, throwing fits, etc. on loop and at high volume running in all rooms. Make sure there is some variety in those loops and to include brats with developmental issues, all ages too.
2. No spending money during the experiment.
3. Set an obnoxious alarm that is super loud, goes off every hour and can't be ignored and make sure to place it outside the bedroom.
4. To mimic the messes brats make just let a herd of goats run amok in your house and feed them a constant diet of laxatives and sugar. The goats must have at least one spouse with them in the same room at any time and can never be left alone. The goats must be spoken to in a gentle fashion at all times, no screaming, and no abuse of any kind. Also, goats must free-range, no tethering of the goats allowed!
5. Get rid of any conveniences (fast food, housekeeping, outside help of any kind, etc.).
6. To get the full Disney treatment this loop should be scheduled to include at least one holiday.
7. Only one spouse can leave the house at any time during this experiment and must be accompanied by at least two of the goats at all times and can only go where goats are permitted by law.
Re: Breeder admits should have spent more time around brats before having one
January 05, 2023
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freya
They constantly argue that the exposure here or there to brats is different when you're parunting 24x7.

They are right, but it isn't an argument in their favor. Exposure here or there has a merciful ending, whereas parenting never does.
Re: Breeder admits should have spent more time around brats before having one
January 05, 2023
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freya
They constantly argue that the exposure here or there to brats is different when you're parunting 24x7.

I know that's one of the many dumbass ways breeders and wanna-breeders often justify having kids - it'll be different when it's your own. How? How exactly will it be different? I think the logic is that because the child is related to them biologically, they will be more tolerant of said child's behavior compared to a total stranger's brat. Anyone with more than a single brain cell will tell you that being related to someone by blood doesn't mean you'll automatically love them. Almost everyone has at least one relative they hate.

That, or they believe their child won't screech all the time and will be a healthy, perfect angel that always listens, sleeps through the night and eats everything on its plate without issue for no reason other than because it's theirs, so therefore it will be much more special.

I don't know why it's so hard for these people to see that it will not be different when the kid is yours. Echoing yurble - the only real difference is when it's your own brat, you can't walk away from it or give it back to the parents when you're tired of its shit. You're stuck with the little asshole for the next two decades, minimum. Other than that, it won't be different.

I think breeders are afraid if they admit to themselves that their child will be just as big of a shit as the total stranger's screaming bastard in the pharmacy, if not moreso, they'll be too afraid to have kids. So they bullshit themselves into believing their child will be wonderful and amazing, only for said child to turn into the exact same kind of screaming bastard.
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I know that's one of the many dumbass ways breeders and wanna-breeders often justify having kids - it'll be different when it's your own. How? How exactly will it be different?

It's different when they are your own: there's no fucking escape, and they are too stupid to realize that.
I remember being a brat and being around lots of other brats. How can this idiot not have similar memories? Did she suffer a major head injury that wiped out all memories of childhood?

There might be a very tiny percentage of kids who are consistently pleasant. Possibly the people who know such kids convince themselves their future kids will be the same as a form of wishful thinking.
I remember growing up as miserable. No abuse or extreme losses, poverty, etc at all. Just being a shy nervous kid and not fitting in!
And the perceived taunts and rejection by other kids was most of it. As time has opened my eyes somewhat, I have realized that a LOT of what I considered exclusion by the other kids was my misperception. But that's all it took! The other kids were much rowdier and outspoken and athletic than I was, and that alone made my life very stressful. At the age of 70+ my nightmares still reflect that---being left alone with no one to turn to, etc. That is one BIG reason I never wanted to have my own kids to "show the glory of childhood"
Re: Breeder admits should hve spent more time around brats before having one
January 07, 2023
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reeniebessagain
I remember growing up as miserable. No abuse or extreme losses, poverty, etc at all. Just being a shy nervous kid and not fitting in!
And the perceived taunts and rejection by other kids was most of it. As time has opened my eyes somewhat, I have realized that a LOT of what I considered exclusion by the other kids was my misperception. But that's all it took! The other kids were much rowdier and outspoken and athletic than I was, and that alone made my life very stressful. At the age of 70+ my nightmares still reflect that---being left alone with no one to turn to, etc. That is one BIG reason I never wanted to have my own kids to "show the glory of childhood"

It's one of the stereotypes about us, that we must have had a miserable childhood. In my observation, a miserable childhood is far more likely to cause someone to breed so that they can "do it better", as if the child they are caring for is an avatar of themselves. Like reeniebessagain, I was unhappy as a child, not because of any abuse, financial insecurity, or loss. I was on one hand quite shy, and on the other quite fierce about my beliefs, which were definitely not aligned with those of the religious cretins around me. My parents were supportive, but I was still socially excluded: I was bookish and had next to nothing in common with the other kids, who were rowdy and loud. Being both bookish and alone, I read the news and worried about the future.

I don't get why some people are sentimental about childhood; being an adult is so much better. It seems to me the authors of children's books have a much better understanding of childhood than the typical breeder. Those books are always filled with secrets kept from adults, vague fears, social angst and strange superstitious rituals - which is much more like what I remember from childhood than Christmas mornings and ice cream.

If I were to have children, I imagine they would be much like me, which means that childhood would be hellish. But it would be even worse to have a kid nothing like me, a typical kid that I can't and never could identify with.
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yurble

It's one of the stereotypes about us, that we must have had a miserable childhood. In my observation, a miserable childhood is far more likely to cause someone to breed so that they can "do it better", as if the child they are caring for is an avatar of themselves.

Ugh, I hate those kinds of stereotypes. I’m CF and I had a great childhood, even though I still dislike kids.
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