Talk about being desperate for dick

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weight-slow
Question for people who are restricted from parks…
What do you do for healthy outdoor activities?

I’m at a complete loss. I’ve always been an outdoorsy person, a hiker, etc… but my guy can’t do any of those things. I can’t handle being holed up watching TV all the time.

Any ideas/suggestions?

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Longjumping_Log_3910
We are not in the US. We have 4 kids, and my husbands crime was child voyeurism not CP. He avoided jail but child safety are giving us hell right now because I am fighting to keep us all together and they're over reacting. Other than that, he registers contact as required and I am always there if he's around kids and he has backed way off anyway. He'd used to kick balls around with our kids in a group but doesn't do any of that now. We don't have laws around where he can/can't go besides no contact with victims, who live far away anyway. So far he's allowed at school events, but we're in a precarious position with CPS so that could change.

...

Battling child services over my husbands conviction. It just is never ending, we've been through so much and I've worked hard to hold it together so to be judged as at risk of failing to protect my kids from my ""high risk"" husband.... They just don't care. His psych reports say LOW RISK but they have their opinions. So, frustrated and so so over all this! But can't give up because my family are it. I don't want my kids abused but I also don't want them losing their dad or worst case being removed (he would move out before that happened). We're not in the US and seeking legal advice.

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openminded1987
m struggling with all of this myself. My partner (who is not my daughter’s father) was just sentenced to 5 years probation and the registry. I’ve had suicidal thoughts myself as I have a public job and have to keep everything secret. But what I know for sure is that my partner is a great dad to his daughter AND mine, and has been in therapy weekly since the arrest 3 years ago (no jail). He has been cleared to live with us and go to parks with us as long as I am present. I want to try my best to keep our little family together. My ex husband is of course beyond livid (I understand why) but I am taking it one day at a time. This group has been a great resource for me. From what I gather, not all kids of SOs are bullied. Every situation is different. Of course, my optimism waxes and wanes with the hour. But I really want to try.

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Poor pedos

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Stings don’t get people. People doing the wrong thing to get stung is what gets people. Pleas don’t blame law enforcement for enticing someone to break the law. The person simply chose to do what they knew to be wrong. I don’t judge their decision. It is what it is.

Yes and no
Often the stings are set up on adult sites and with adult profiles, once the chat starts they then say they are a minor. So yes we should have walked away, we should have stopped the convo. We made the choice not to, but not all of us were out looking for a minor and if not for the sting would not have been talking to a minor and would not have committed the crime. Just remember not all situations are black and white.

Waah my pervert BF betrayed me even after i supported his worthless ass

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despearate bitch
Completely Lost

Hi all,

I have posted here previously about my boyfriend, he is currently locked up in CA for CP possession. I am back with a more personal question.

Some background: I have been with my bf for 5 years, we have had a few run ins with him looking at cam girls, sexting someone we both know, and then this cp charge. I have his phone, and in a moment of weakness looked at his text messages. Mostly harmless, but there was one message of him reaching out to an escort service in October.

After seeing this message, I looked into his blocked messages and there are DOZENS of them. Some giving prices, some saying hello, some saying "Okay I'll meet you".

Needless to say, I am shattered. I have carried this man through this time in our lives as best as one can. Putting endless amounts of money on his books, putting enough money on the phone to talk an hour or so every single night, holding down our bills and apartment, paying his credit card etc.

My question to you is: in your opinion, is it better for me to tell him I know these things now, or should I continue to hold him down until he is home and then have the conversation with him? I truly love him, but this is the last straw for me, I cannot put my health and wellbeing at risk. I cannot look past this. I know that addiction plays into all of this, but I don't know that I am strong enough to rebuild from what I've seen. He's due to be released in July, potentially June if he gets an early kick. I don't want to make it worse for him there, he's lost so much already.

I want to continue to support him and give him the love he needs to make it out of this, but is that unfair to him? To hold onto this relationship ending information until he's home? I am truly lost. He is my best friend, I've built a whole life with him, and to see that he's been doing this for so long is just heart breaking.

Thank you in advance for your input.

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There are some hard core sex offenders out there, the true repeat offenders, but let us get real, they are the exception to the rule. Teachers that got caught up with one of their students probably fall into the category of just making a mistake. Being x teachers, they made a significant effort to get their degree, their certificate, and then everything blew up in their face. Probably no one is more sorry than they are for what they did.

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Hello - I’ve had some experience in this area as my fiancé is also on the list for one count of CM and it was also a long time ago.

When things got serious I decided to tell my friends. This was a BIG MISTAKE for me. It spread like wildfire through my peer group and one of them called CPS. They launched an entire investigation (I should mention here that I have a daughter who is now almost 11, 8 at that time, and I have a VERY controlling narcissistic ex who used all of this to his advantage). This investigation lasted over a year and cost around $10k in lawyer fees all around. I was charged with neglect and it was ultimately dropped. My fiancé was arrested for registry violation for staying the night at my apartment and not registering there. He could not be around my daughter at all throughout this whole disaster and my ex was fighting hard to keep him away from our kid. Everything was ultimately dropped and my fiancé can be around my daughter but it has to be supervised by me. It’s really all back to normal except that I have been completely ostracized.

My “friends” claim that I make “bad decisions” and they cannot trust me. According to the only one who still talks to me - the others feel that I have poor judgment. I deeply regret ever telling anyone about it. I made other poor decisions at that time too not knowing just how much people hate RSOs. It was surprising to me. I should mention that I have a PhD and my friends are highly educated, mostly liberal/progressive/granola folks who preach about “acceptance” and “kindness”. As long as you’re not an RSO I guess. Just be ready for even the friends that you ‘think’ are the most open minded, might be the ones who shut you out the hardest.

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bell_flower
I was reading another one over on Reddit where a woman was talking about her husband's family. This woman had a kid, and the husband's sister was married to a RSO who had been arrested again. Grandma and the SIL were protecting the guy in the husband's family and still inviting the RSO to events. The woman and her husband were going to these events but ignoring the RSO. The woman's husband said he still wanted to have contact with this guy's kids (two pre-teen boys) and the whole topic became a raging debate.

A lot of people made the very good point that this woman and her husband should cut off Grandma and the SIL because they both lacked judgement. And by hanging around them, the kid may get the idea these people could be trusted.

Having been in this situation myself, I think it makes a lot of sense. The older I get, the more I think enablers are just as bad as the criminals themselves.

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pedo
Pretty much, I met my wife literally a week after getting out of prison. Told her during our third date.

She has a son, the only concerns ever were how would it impact his life, not any risks or anything else.

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LoveToLurk
I want to make snarky responses to these comments, but I honestly don’t even know where to start. What in the Kentucky Fried Fuck is wrong with these women?!?

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Enabler

She said she previously held the idea that once you were a child molester you are always a child molester, but she realized Jerry’s story is different. She said Jerry owns up to his mistake. She added that he was young and it took him a while to realize that what he did was wrong.

“His story was the story of someone who should have said no to someone who was a little too young,” Melissa said. “He doesn’t like what he did. It took him a long time to understand that what he did was wrong because she was willing and he was willing. He was the adult. He should have said, 'this isn’t something you shouldn’t be doing at this age.' He didn’t make that decision and he hates it.”

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LoveToLurk
From the Inside Edition article:

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Enabler

She said she previously held the idea that once you were a child molester you are always a child molester, but she realized Jerry’s story is different. She said Jerry owns up to his mistake. She added that he was young and it took him a while to realize that what he did was wrong.

“His story was the story of someone who should have said no to someone who was a little too young,” Melissa said. “He doesn’t like what he did. It took him a long time to understand that what he did was wrong because she was willing and he was willing. He was the adult. He should have said, 'this isn’t something you shouldn’t be doing at this age.' He didn’t make that decision and he hates it.”

This dude was arrested five times. One of them was for cheating on his previous wife with a fifteen year old. I don’t feel bad for these women, I really don’t. They deserve every ounce of the ridicule and hatred they receive. I do however, weep for their children.

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toronto star

During a private counselling session with a couple of newlyweds Fedoroff asks how she’s holding up. He works with couples because offenders whose spouses stick by them tend to do better in treatment.

“It’s obviously stressful and tough,” she says, noting her husband is slated to be sentenced soon. “But our marriage has grown stronger.”

While they were engaged, he was charged with flashing and masturbating in public. She bailed him out and went ahead with the wedding.

Her husband pipes up, “For her not to turn away ... I don’t know where I’d be without her support and love.”

When asked by a Star reporter why she stayed with him, the wife explains: “I love him, of course. Everyone makes mistakes. I just thought, ‘This isn’t him and I can help him.’”