Moos get nasty: Member has a kiddie pic avatar and posts on a miscarriage forum

This one right here is outrageous. It's a miscarriage forum where they have rules not to "post" kid or baybee pics because it might upset those who have miscarried, but one of the posters has a pic of her toddler as her avatar. Wouldn't they have had to have suffered a miscarriage as well to even be a member on that forum? Well, I don't "get it", but then I am not a moowcow. NONE of the good stuff was posted so I guess that they just stuck to not posting at all anywhere NEAR that kiddie avatar and took to sending sending nasty grams instead.




Initial post from moderator:


"I would like to ask that when posting in this forum that we please refrain from posting pictures of babies and children. Everyone grieves in a different way, and for many women who have had miscarriages, images of children are hard to take. Since this forum is to be a refuge for those who have miscarried, please keep this in mind and remember that we're all in different places in the grieving process, and some members may not be ready to see pictures of children.



Moderator's second post:


"....... Ladies, Ladies... Avatars are the pictures we can post with our signiture. The avatars are not controllable for just one board. You can't just change it in one place. They are active across the board. When ever you change them they appear in every post everywhere on the Forums. That's just the way it is. And last, DO NOT send ANYONE here threatening emails or nasty, mean, condescending, or hate mail of any kind .....

Edited by Jenna - Christianity Editor (04/05/05 05:09 PM)
_________________________
JESUS DOESN'T HOLD UP A STANDARD, HE HOLDS UP A MIRROR AND SAYS REFLECT ME!




Now the manager steps in!

"I'm one of the managers here at at this forum. In fact, I'm the manager in charge of the forums
When a user of this forum changes their avatar the change is made for every post that user has ever made......... For those who've gone on to have healthy children after a miscarriage, please be mindful of those who have not.



The apology
After experiencing the death of my first son and miscarriages I was just so proud of my baby boy, my only living son. I wasn't bragging that I have a child and others don't, I wasn't intending to hurt anyone. I have my son as my avatar because I have many, many good friends who are editors at this forum who have gone through my pregnancy and I want to share my son with them and the world.

I do not begrudge the women who wrote me some nasty (and some not nasty) emails. I have been there, I know the hurt. After my first miscarriage I freaked out at a woman in a store because she cut in front of my in line. If she hadn't been so pregnant I probably would have ignored it.

I'm not going to post here any longer since the picture of my son obviously upsets people. I will not remove the picture as my avatar, and I plan on using a new picture of him (and my other children) in the future.

Oh, and btw - Thanks for the post Krissi, I'm glad you understand that I didn't put my son's pic up to be mean, it's my avatar, nothing more, it's on all my posts."





How selfish and narrow minded can these women be if they can't even bear to see a kiddie avatar? Why are they "going off" on pregnant women after they miscarry? I had no idea that they practically hated other women who went on to pop out healthy kyds after a miscarriage. If someone in my support group (or circle of friends) was able to overcome an obstacle or succeed at something, then I would genuinely be happy for them, REGARDLESS if I had been able to overcome or accomplish whatever it may have been too. Does a person get angry and jealous that his neighbor's house was spared when his was destroyed by a tornado, or is he happy for him that HIS property was spared? It SHOULD give them hope, rather then fill them with hatred and jealousy. If they can't even stand to see an avatar of a stranger's kyd, how do they function in the real world?

I think that this level of hatred and jealousy over something like someone having a healthy chyld after having had miscarriages, makes them a bit dangerous. (The Hand that Rocks the Cradle, comes to mind)

There's something very unwholesome to me about making a public show of a sad personal loss.

If they wanted the child, of course it is sad to them to have lost it.

I can also see that the loss is in a way a permanent hole in one's life, even after the grieving process has tapered off. That's sad, but I think a normal part of life. There are lots of people walking around with invisible permanent holes of losses, of various kinds, that they're silently bearing. The loss of my Oma is one of mine. In a way it was also a peephole that allowed me to look through and write some poetry for her that I didn't know I had in me.

But dwelling on losses--at great length--on an online forum, and getting upset over avatars, seems...unhealthy.

Personally, I think it's a rip. Let all these sick moos tear each other apart. And if seeing an avatar of a kyd is the worst thing that this slag has happen to her, she's lucky. I'm not even sad when these slags miscarry..one less brat on the earth. They make up for their loss by stroking each other's egos. Maybe if these people had some taste and would mourn privately (just on the off chance it was a real repugnancy and not a tampon burial), they wouldn't have to have their pweshus peewins hurt.

Maybe if these people had some taste and would mourn privately (just on the off chance it was a real repugnancy and not a tampon burial), they wouldn't have to have their pweshus peewins hurt.

Very true. No one says you can't kinda absent yourself from the world for a while, mentally or physically--without explanation or apologies. And then move on bravely...without making a spectacle of one's painful and unpleasant experience.

Getting upset over an avatar is just...(brain explodes)

ridiculous?

Oh these damn whores are not "mourning" they are looking for attention. A bunch of sick narcissists they all are.

People who mourn do not come online with it.

Yes......that's the word, ridiculous.

(Dang nab it, Merlyn has not posted an avatar, so I can't get upset about it...phooey).

If they're truly that disturbed over the miscarriages, then the kid avatars are a no-no...it's somewhat the same as when a battle-scarred Vietnam veteran hears something that triggers their combat instincts. A 'mental trigger' if I remember right. But in both cases we're talking people with seriously messed up minds. As in flashbacks, hearing voices, uncontrollable fits of sobbing, yada yada yada.

Eventually you have to move on after ANY traumatic experience. That's life. People whose psyche has been so shattered they cannot do so need a one-way trip to the funny farm both for our sake and theirs. And if there's an entire forum full of almost-moms who are in that condition and walking around among us...well...that's a scary thought.

These women are INSANE.

Jeebus on a stick. If they can't handle images of children, then they'd better not turn on the TV, open a magazine or even go out in public any more.

I'm sure some of these people are mentally unbalanced. Grief is one thing, yes, but the extreme these people carry it to is just retarded. And the whole bio-snob thing pisses me off too ... if it's such a strain and you want a child that badly, you could adopt one RIGHT NOW. But oooohhh no, we couldn't possibly do that, we have to have our own DNA and all the associated drama.

My Scottish Terrier had to be put down in 2001. Since then I've petitioned the makers of Scottish Terrier calendars and books, breeders and rescuers to obliterate the breed so that I never have to be reminded of my pain again. My calls to the White House regarding the prominently placed Ms. Beazly and Barney have gone ignored. Can you believe the callousness of some? The nerve of them owning Scotties and breeding more when it's been less than 8 years since I suffered my loss.

Yeah...that's about as ridiculous as these people on the miscarriage forum sound.

I just love the passive aggresiveness of the apology note..."I guess I won't post here any more so I don't hurt your feelings, but I'm totally using my child AND ALL FUTURE CHILDREN I HAVE as my avatars, so suck on that you poison womb bitches"
Klassy.

"It truly is the one commonality that every designation of humans you can think of has, there's at least one asshole."
--Me

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Feh
I just love the passive aggresiveness of the apology note..."I guess I won't post here any more so I don't hurt your feelings, but I'm totally using my child AND ALL FUTURE CHILDREN I HAVE as my avatars, so suck on that you poison womb bitches"
Klassy.

That didn't get lost on me either and made me wonder if perhaps she HAD'N'T been gloating. Since she has deleted her posts, I don't guess I can know but it sure does sound like that is possible. The main gripe the miscarried moomies had (from the context clues I perceived) was that THEY hadn't been able to give birth to a healthy child yet and SHE had and they felt as if she was bragging about it, which she may have been. If that's the case, not only are the bitches who are sobbing, heaving, and sending nasty grams absurd, but the bitch who bragged about later having healthy kyds when she was aware that her "audience" was a roomful of martyr miscarriage moos, is a nutcase as well. She went on to suggest that they have a "healthy baybee after miscarriage" forum added, or that the angry moocows go to the control panel and click on the "hide avatar" buttons. I am not defending the moocows who complained because they are selfish attention mongering idiots, but what kind of person experiences a "tragedy" like a miscarriage and then goes on to rub other "sufferers" noses in it after SHE finally sprogs a healthy pup?

I have been around miscarriage martyr moos before in the workplace and have witnessed them heaving, mourning, and carrying on like there will never be another sunrise. Then, they get knocked up again soon thereafter and sprog a healthy baybee. Then, not long after ANOTHER whore will get knocked up and lose her bloody kotex and of course the waterworks start up. That SAME moocow, who only months before was in the depths of depression over HER flushed tampon, would literally stand there with her healthy kyd in it's stroller and say shit like, "She sure is over reacting! It was probably for the best since something was obviously wrong with it! It's not like she can't try again...", and so on. I think that is the height of insensitivity because these women KNOW how it feels, yet they apparently can feel or express NO empathy, much like a sociopath.

Well, yeah, but maybe the moos who go on to have a healthy loaf after having had a miscarriage see the stupidity and absurdity of all the hystrionics over a bloody tampon. I'd tell those bitches to get with it, too. My god, does everyone on the fucking planet HAVE to sympathise over something which frequently happens as the body's way of saying "defective"?? The less sympathy these cows receive, the more likely that they'll tone down the mooing and lowing. They're looking for sympathy and I think there are simply better things to feel sad about.

Moos, they're either crying and wailing because they've gotten their period, or they're bragging to the ends of the earth that their child can drool. Really, is there ANYTHING they won't resort to for a little attention? Hell, they'll even whip their tits out if they don't sense anyone looking at - I mean worshipping - them.

"It truly is the one commonality that every designation of humans you can think of has, there's at least one asshole."
--Me

Hey Kim, did you notice that you look at from the Christian Fundie forum.
I thought they are holy and sympothy. But unlike moos troll on Childfree Websites. But at the Christian Forum the moos do go at each other over one dead baby-fetus is more precious than another.

When it comes to moos. They are certainly breeder cannibals and they might as well eat each other for real when they compete against each other to see which baby is better.

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Gigabyte
Hey Kim, did you notice that you look at from the Christian Fundie forum.
I thought they are holy and sympothy. But unlike moos troll on Childfree Websites. But at the Christian Forum the moos do go at each other over one dead baby-fetus is more precious than another.

When it comes to moos. They are certainly breeder cannibals and they might as well eat each other for real when they compete against each other to see which baby is better.

Yes Giggy, I have noticed. I find it particularly telling when they claim to live by the teachings of Jesus Christ and then act like demons from the bowels of Satan's belly. That's one reason I left that signature on there so everyone could see it was in a Christian area of the forum, or at least it was being moderated by one. I was brought up in and around fundie religious types and saw firsthand how many of them operate, so that's perhaps why I am so negative towards them. I have also known some people who practiced the Christian faith and were/are active within a Christian denomination church who were/are truly good people. It's the hypocrites who have the audacity to openly judge others who I absolutely detest. In my open disain and frequent hateful comments I make towards them, I always hope that the good people who truly follow the teachings of Jesus don't take offense.

I have also known some people who practiced the Christian faith and were/are active within a Christian denomination church who were/are truly good people.

[o/t] Yep, I can be the obnoxious atheist perhaps too much of the time, but I have a friend who works in an interfaith social justice organization who has done more for local and distant humanity, with compassion and love, than I will in a lifetime. I respect him very much for his good work, done in the name of Christianity. He is not only my ideal of a true Christian, but my ideal of a good person. [/o/t]

To be honest I have known few Christians worth knowing or dialoguing with. There are a few who seem to at least try to live according to the teachings of Jesus--but damned few! I just get burned out with the "come to Jesus" spiel most of them come up with sooner or later.

I like God and Jesus. Their fucking fan club is supremely irritating...

I like God and Jesus. Their fucking fan club is supremely irritating...

OK, that made me smile...well said!

Reminds me of the Jefferson Bible: http://articles.latimes.com/2008/jul/05/local/me-beliefs5