The most insulting bingo

We all been bingo so many times and I hear stupid bingo by parents, breeders and society.

The question for you CF folks is what is the most insulting bingo you ever heard and why.

Some of my most insulting bingo ever heard:

"Who will look after you when you are old?"
This bingo is one the definete because this bingo is saying that you have a child as a Human Insurance policy - invest your kid into your own future. People use their bingo to their child mostly end up in the nursing home. Child grows and gets old themselves. When they have child of their own when they grow, they got their own family. Also if the live at the other side of the country/planet, they not going to go back to their old parents when they are working.
In my personal experience. My granma must of taught my mum the same bingo that their kids is going to look after them when they are old. That's why my mum going on about the same bingo. But I don't have time to look after my mum when she is old because I am busy working and if I do look after my mum when she old. I have to give up my job which I made it clear I am not doing or else there will be no more income to pay my dues and fees and utility bills. Also finding a job is freggin hard to do which I finnaly got and now people losing jobs during this current credit crunch. She sometimes use this bingo because she does not like nursing home which I do understand about.
My advice to people is to never use this bingo and it's not the end of the world when you go to nursing homes.


"You were a child one"
This is another one because this one is saying that how your parent wipe your ass and change your diapers when you were a child. Well some parent might of enjoy changing smelly diapers but I don't and stay CF. People use thing bingo is saying that, how "Your mum use to wipe your ass, now you should do the same when you have a child". Well - no thanks I don't have to do it because again I not having a kid.

The most insulting bingo is "You really do want kyds and you can't have them". It usually takes the form of a sympathetic word or gesture, but it can also be snarky, such as when being trolled on the internet.

With me, the latter usually involves something about how I can't get a mayun because of all my cats.

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"I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell"

:eatu

"You'll change your mind".

I find it highly insulting that some moron who's met me five minutes before has the gall to ASSume they know me better than I do.

Yeah, the "You'll change your mind" one infuriates me too. Do you know how much shit you'd catch if you ever said that to a preggo? My mother's idiot BF coined a new version of this bingo too...when I said in passing that I was CF, his reply was, "You WILL have kids and you WILL love them!" and it sounded like a demand.

I have never had this one said to me, but I still loathe it: "You'll have kids when you meet the right man/woman", especially if it's said to someone who is in a long-term relationship. People are too dumb to understand that, when you're CF, the right person also doesn't want kids.

And finally, I really hate any bingo that implies or outright accuses CFers of being immature or unwilling to become "real" adults because having kids is somehow a magic passage from childhood to adulthood. It is very insulting to say that a moron teenage whore who shat out a kid when she was 15, drops out, and who makes her own parents care for her mistake is somehow more mature than a full-grown CF man or woman who pays their own bills, makes their own decisions and is independent. And it goes even beyond that...if one person at a family reunion recently got their Ph.D. and another is a woman who just shat out a kid, guess who will get all the congratulations? The thing that any mammal can do has become something more noteworthy than achieving something only a certain few can (graduating college, building a house, completing a complicated quilt, performing surgery on oneself, attaining a black belt...and so forth).

Cambion, I can't say I have received any bingos recently (or ever, as far as I can remember), but your response to the immature/unwilling bingo is extremely well said.

About the term, "bingo" in general, I did a doubletake the first time I saw it used in the context of CF becasue in my beloved game of Scrabble, the term, "bingo" is something every Scrabble strives to GET! In Scrabble, it refers to when a player plays all 7 tiles on one turn and received the 50-point bonus, usually scoring between 65 and 80 points on that turn. For example, in 2 games I played last Thursday night, I played 3 "bingos" and they helped me both games.

While I consider ALL bingos offensive, one that really grinds my crank is, "You will never experience the type of love that only a mother and child can share, as there is NO love greater or bond stronger than the love between a mother and her child". Okay, let me rip that bingo a new asshole, if I may.:inw




1) While I love my mother very very much and can't imagine life without her, I have experienced love and bonds with other people that I would consider the same or similar as the intensity of love that I have for my mother, but just perhaps in a different way. I don't sit around and try and gauge who I love more than another either, unlike these rabid breeders. I am CERTAIN that my mother has experienced that same level (and perhaps greater) of love for people other than her children such as with her OWN mother, her father and siblings, my father, her grandchildren, etc..... and I know for a fact she has a high level of love and care for one of her lifelong friends of over 50 years. I think this is normal and that GOOD mothers condone, nurture, and perhaps even instill the capacity to love and bond with other people in their children. So, it is simply not a true statement that there is NO OTHER love or bond that is comparable to that of a mother-child.



2)This outright says that FATHERS can not feel the same love for his child that a mother does and I know that this is simply not true either. They use the excuse (worn and busted for a lie as it may be) that it's because they have "given birth and carried it in their bodies", If that was the variable that enabled THEIR love to be so all fired greater than a father's love, then WHY do they demand that people recognize that they STILL feel the "exact same love" for their IVF baybees carried by a surrogate, adopted kyds, etc......that they claim to have for the bio kyds who they gave birth to or carried in their bellies, blah blah blah.......? One or the other is a lie as they simply both can't be true.



3)How can they even PRESUME to know what kind of love that I am capable of and to PRESUME that I love in the exact same ways that they do, so that I am therefore going to miss out on some "special love" which is reserved for "bio mothers only"? Maybe the love that they have for their kyd IS the greatest love and bond ever for THEM, but it may not be for me (I can say with reasonable certainty that it wouldn't be),



4) It (this mother-child bond thing) OBVIOUSLY isn't considered all that unbreakable and automatically binding to ALL women or we wouldn't have hundreds of thousands of children in the foster care system, murdered by moomie and vice versa kyds, child abuse/neglect, websites springing up all over the world wide web with empty nesters whining that their kyds have abandoned them/cut them off/won't speak, etc...., and all of these "tough love" moomies who just disassociate with their kyds FOR YEARS because they don't approve of their gay lifestyles, their religion, their choice of spouse or partner, their living arrangements, their addictions, , etc......They don't have to "enable" them to send a card, stop by and say "hello" or pick up the phone once in a while. Although, with this SPECIAL and coveted love, I would have expected them to be automatically accepting and/or helpful in the kyds' times of need, rather than disassociate like so many of them do.



5) IF this "special love-bond" was SO SO SO powerful, then how could they just cut the ties that bind like they do so often? Why are there thousands of prisoners who go online and BEG for people to write to them who haven't had a visitor in YEARS and YEARS? WHERE is their moomie? Where were the moomies of those 87 homeless people who died in Katrina who were finally buried this past year after NO ONE came forward to claim their bloated bodies after THREE YEARS? Many of their famblees were located, but no one came. Many of these people were young and likely "street people", so WHERE was their moomie? What happened to that "special bond"? WHERE was moomie and her special and unrivaled love when her little girl was selling herself on the streets of New Orleans for a vial of heroin or her son was learning to give blow jobs in back alleys for just enough to fill a crack pipe?



6) It must be assumed then that the same magical love is reciprocal so that the child must ALSO feel that "unbreakable bond", which is very very VERY rarely the case. There is SO much proof of this that there isn't enough room on the internet to list all of it. One last thing which is on a related note; This "unbreakable bond of love" that ALL single moos and divorced moos claim to have with the baybee daddy with their comments like, "We will ALWAYS have a bond and there will ALWAYS be a "special place" in his heart for me because of "our baybee" together" , is without a doubt the BIGGEST, MOST BOGUS pile of shit that has ever spewed out of their mouths. I have heard this said SO many times and it was all I could do to keep my trap shut. I suppose that their baybee daddy has formed unique "unbreakable love bonds" with women all over the Eastern Seaboard in some cases. The absolute kicker is when they say that even though he has three kyds with as many different women, that THIS baybee will be different somehow as far as his acting like a father, sticking around, and coughing up the cash for his mistake.:fmbl

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liz
"You'll change your mind".

I find it highly insulting that some moron who's met me five minutes before has the gall to ASSume they know me better than I do.

I agree with this ^

The "you where once a child" never gets to me because my retort is "and i hated them then too." Seriously, I dropped out of girlscouts cause i was so tired of the crap they had us doing. All of the girls where so damn spoiled. And it didn't help that we had a polyanna one X-mas and the girl who got my present told me in detail how much she hated it.

There is no greater love than between a mother and child.. Sure worked for Susan Smith.

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liz
"You'll change your mind".

Thus my signature.

"You don't become a real adult until you have children."

Usually said by the same slack-jawed mouth-breathing SAHMs who forgo the laundry and cleaning the house while they flop onto the couch to watch a show headed by a female entrepreneur who created her own entertainment empire from jack scratch. I wonder if they'd say the same garbage to (CF) Oprah's face.

Followed by a Price is Right rerun, headed by a beloved entertainer loved by millions, the (CF) Bob Barker. Presumably they wouldn't say such tripe to him either.

I do hope they've at least heard of Laurie Anderson, Louis Armstrong, George Clooney, Samuel Beckett, Lewis Black, Dorothy Parker, Charles Addams, Susan B. Anthony, Beethoven, Louisa May Alcott, Scott Adams (Dilbert cartoonist), Mary Pickford, Tallulah Bankhead, Eubie Blake, Florence Nightingale, Billy Collins (my favorite poet!), Copernicus, Mary Chapin Carpenter, Margaret Cho, James Buchanan, Amelia Earhart, William Blake, Coco Chanel, Katherine Hepburn, Nikola Tesla, Germaine Greer, Gloria Steinem, Maynard Keynes, Ginger Rogers, Anna Freud, Maria Callas, Margot Fonteyn, Agnes de Mille, Jonathan Kozol, ET CETERA.

It's safe to say those (CF, all of 'em) individuals' adult achievements have and will stand the test of time, when insignificant moos, with their petty and meaningless lives, are dead and forgotten.

Can you imagine one of these moomie blatherers telling Amelia Earhart, Katherine Hepburn, or Laurie Anderson they're "not fully adult"?

Laurie Anderson probably doesn't consider herself "fully adult", and would take that as a compliment if someone said that to her.

Just my guess.

Paradise is exactly like where you are right now, only much, MUCH better!

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"I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell"

:eatu

A lot of people assume I'm incapable of having children because I have a physical disability. I've had people assume that "I DON'T want children" is a euphemism for "I CAN'T have children." I find it insulting because 1.) they are assuming things about my disability that aren't true, and 2.) they are assuming that I want children in the first place. Believe me, I WISH my disability rendered me incapable of having children. Then my boyfriend and I wouldn't need to bother with birth control!

Same here. Although I don't have a disability, I suspect that I would have been one of those people who had to "TTC" for-EVAH if I had been so inclined. The reason for this is because I am the only female I know well who has never been knocked-up, and I have been careless with birth-control quite a few times. For the first few years I was with my now-DH, we didn't use ANYthing (except the ol' pull-out). Great was my happiness when I was diagnosed with endometriosis and got to have most of it removed. We don't need no stinkin' fallopian tubes!

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"I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell"

:eatu

I worked in a restaurant for nearly seven years, and I worked with a lot of moos who were constantly struggling to pay the bills and almost all of them were on some type of government assistance. And yet, when they would ask me when I planned to have kids (even before I was married, and even before I HAD MET MY FUTURE HUSBAND AND WAS SINGLE - this is their mentality, to have a kid with no dad just for the sake of having an f-ing kid), I would always tell them never, and they always seemed like I was an asshole for saying that. And sometimes they would act like I was naive, as if everyone has kids at some point. Well, I know how to use a condom, so no, not everyone will have kids. Anyway, we would always debate about this, and this always killed me because obviously their lives were total shit due to the fact that they had multiple kids from, sometimes, multiple dads. I would tell them how much I hate kids. And inevitably, I would get this, my most hated bingo:

You'll feel different when they're your own kids!

Yeah, because idiotic breeders never see the error of their own children's ways - EVER. And do I want to be one of those people, so blinded by hormones and the fog of maternity that I can't see that my child is being an asshole and ruining the lives of everyone it meets in public? God, I hate when they say that, and they always do! The only reason people feel that way is because they know they're stuck with the kid for life. They pretty much have to love it, and nature made it this way, or they would go insane with the knowledge that they are in a hellish prison of their own genitals' making.

Anyway, even if it's true that "you feel different when they're your own," this is no reason to have a baby. This is no time to experiment. What if you don't feel that way when you get a baby of your very own? It happens.

Just thought I would share. I have always hated when people say this to me. It is just a useless thing to tell CF people. For that one possible reason to have kids, I can think of a thousand reasons not to.

Have any of you ever answered a bingo such as "It's different when they're your own" or "You'll never know happiness like you will when you have children" with "I don't believe you" or "Stop lying to me" or something like that? I will the next time I get such a bingo, but I don't get them that often any more for some reason.

"It truly is the one commonality that every designation of humans you can think of has, there's at least one asshole."
--Me

What I hate above every other type is, after I've said I don't want kids for the 100th time, when Moo's passive aggressively say "It's probably a good thing that those who know they'd be unfit parents don't want children." Just because I don't want to pop out a brat doesn't mean I'd be a horrible parent, it just means I don't want to be a slave to mindless breeding. It's funny that I get nothing but positive comments about being CF from men/dads.

Kaye

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Feh
Have any of you ever answered a bingo such as "It's different when they're your own" or "You'll never know happiness like you will when you have children" with "I don't believe you" or "Stop lying to me" or something like that? I will the next time I get such a bingo, but I don't get them that often any more for some reason.

I used to get that one a lot when I was a step parent. LIKE THE OTHER MOOS in the shithole circles known as PTA, and kiddie friends' moos of my step daughter, etc.......I would occasionally bitch about something very oh-so-typical such as, " I will be SO glad when this damned bake sale is over", etc........and invariably, one of them would say, "It's different when it's your own". In cases like this, the "comeback" was rather easy. I would say, "REALLY? How is a week long bake sale different for you than it is for me? Just yesterday, you said that you were SICK of having to frost cakes, so how is it different for YOU? Does it take less of your time? Do you mean that you mind doing it slightly less because it benefits a biological child rather than a step child? WHAT exactly do you mean????". They never could make a good recovery on any of those "comebacks", but it was interesting to watch them try.


When it was said in reference to raising a child is "different when it's your own", it really depended on who said it. It was quite common for the moos to not only have bio kyds, but MOST of them had step kyds (that they loved "just like their own") from their husbands' prior marriages living with them and of course, the token and immediate, "one of their own" too. If they said it I would say, "Really?? Please explain to me how raising your Snotley is "different" than raising Step Snotley, because THIS I really would like to hear. Do you secretly love your bio kyds more, since you always claim you "love ALL of my kyds the same", or do you care more that Regular Snotley gets his field trip paid for than Step Snotley, since he isn't your bio kyd? HOW exactly is it "different? Does your husband feel this way too? Maybe I should ask him when he gets here". That would REALLY stump them and on occasion, they would get defensive, aggressive and downright angry. Others would start apologizing for having had offended me and start up on some syrupy campaign about what a WONDERFUL mother I was to try and make up for it, as I walked off while they rambled on.larious


Then there's the cases where it's just said in general such as in reference to any comment made by me that having kyds was a pain in the ass. Then I would generally say something like, "Well, it may be, but I really don't want to take a chance and find out that I was correct because it's not like I can return the kyd, ya know?" Actually, the "comeback" that seems to work best is simply, "REALLY? How so, I wish you would explain that". They don't expect that and it's fun to watch them wallow around and try to think up answers to a RIDICULOUS and completely unfounded parotted statement, which they have never even thought about before having said it anyway. I enjoy standing there, rubbing my chin, eyes cocked to the side, in a condescending and skeptical way and tone and say, "Mmmmm, really? .", "Oh, I see"...etc........... I hate moocows with a passion and every single one of them are big fat liars and have airs of superiority, simply because they squatted out a kyd.

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Kaye
What I hate above every other type is, after I've said I don't want kids for the 100th time, when Moo's passive aggressively say "It's probably a good thing that those who know they'd be unfit parents don't want children." Just because I don't want to pop out a brat doesn't mean I'd be a horrible parent, it just means I don't want to be a slave to mindless breeding.

Exactly, Kaye! But they just have to insult our character and insinuate that there's something seriously wrong with us. Like we're all defective monsters.

I'm quite sure I wouldn't be an unfit parent either - I just don't want to BE a parent, period!

I used to talk about adoption to a so-called friend years ago (I decided not to do the adoption thing after all...not really my thing) and he said that "I'd give birth to my OWN child and I will have such a special bond with it, too." I mouthed him off and he got MAD! He was such a handsome, friendly, lovable young man whom I had befriended in college...now what happened?

Personally, I think "mother-child" bond is really a disgusting incestuous tit-sucking orgy driven by animal instincts or something.

Another demeaning bingo from another so-called college friend (he really said horrid things to me anyway) is that I'd get married, have sex, and have a baby, too. Like my body is something to be used, right?=P

No wonder I refuse to be in a real relationship - even a CF one.