Some words of truth...
Posted by Heidi
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Some words of truth... January 09, 2009 |
I was just watching Stargate SG-1 and there was a little conversation between couple characters conserning having children. Nothing we CF people don't already know, though. But I really wanted to share it with you guys. 
Enjoy!
Discussing having kids:
Guy 1: All night screaming. Projectile vomiting. Nuclear diapers. You have no idea. The reason they make 'em so cute is so you don't suffocate 'em in their sleep.
Guy 2: Sir, you have four kids.
Guy 1: Why do you think I enjoy work so much? Don't get me wrong. I love the little buggers to death, but trust me it makes going through a Stargate and facing alien bad guys look like nothing. This is relaxing.
Guy 2: Then why'd you have four?
Guy 1: One's pretty bad. But you figure you gotta have two so the little guy can have a brother or sister, right? Then you have two boys, and the wife says she wants a girl. You figure, hell, three can't be much worse than two, right? What you don't realise is your brain is fried cos you haven't slept. After three, four is no big deal. You're so deep in. Nothing seems to matter any more. It's chaos. You're just trying to make it through each day alive. And in the end you spend all the energy you have left trying to get 'em into bed. Only to lie awake, praying they don't get hooked on drugs. Or hurt. Or worse, wind up dead in an alley somewhere.
Guy 2: I can't wait, sir (sarcastic).
Guy 1: Miracle of birth, my ass. I'll tell you what a miracle is. Birth control that works.
And, the watching the ultra sound picture of the baby of the Guy 2:
Guy 1: It looks like an alien.
Guy 2: Shut up.
Guy 1: Remember that thing on P2X-787?
Guy 2: Get lost.
Guy 1: See, that thing was easy on the eyes by comparison.
Guy 3: Let me see. That's pretty scary, Wells.
Guy 2: It's my unborn son, sir.
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Enjoy!Discussing having kids:
Guy 1: All night screaming. Projectile vomiting. Nuclear diapers. You have no idea. The reason they make 'em so cute is so you don't suffocate 'em in their sleep.
Guy 2: Sir, you have four kids.
Guy 1: Why do you think I enjoy work so much? Don't get me wrong. I love the little buggers to death, but trust me it makes going through a Stargate and facing alien bad guys look like nothing. This is relaxing.
Guy 2: Then why'd you have four?
Guy 1: One's pretty bad. But you figure you gotta have two so the little guy can have a brother or sister, right? Then you have two boys, and the wife says she wants a girl. You figure, hell, three can't be much worse than two, right? What you don't realise is your brain is fried cos you haven't slept. After three, four is no big deal. You're so deep in. Nothing seems to matter any more. It's chaos. You're just trying to make it through each day alive. And in the end you spend all the energy you have left trying to get 'em into bed. Only to lie awake, praying they don't get hooked on drugs. Or hurt. Or worse, wind up dead in an alley somewhere.
Guy 2: I can't wait, sir (sarcastic).
Guy 1: Miracle of birth, my ass. I'll tell you what a miracle is. Birth control that works.
And, the watching the ultra sound picture of the baby of the Guy 2:
Guy 1: It looks like an alien.
Guy 2: Shut up.
Guy 1: Remember that thing on P2X-787?
Guy 2: Get lost.
Guy 1: See, that thing was easy on the eyes by comparison.
Guy 3: Let me see. That's pretty scary, Wells.
Guy 2: It's my unborn son, sir.
.
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Re: Some words of truth... January 09, 2009 |
This is hilarious, Heidi. I love Guy #1's third comment. His wacky explanation for how he ended up with four kids sounds like the typical excuses breeders give for having more. 'Gotta give kid #1 a sibling, right? Oh, ended up with two of the same sex, gotta try for a different one! Oh, well we have 7 already, 8 won't make much of a difference, right?' Ha ha ha.
I'm with Guy #2 - I can't WAIT to be a parent!
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"The secret of dealing successfully with a child is not to be its parent." -- Mel Lazarus
"Women who miscalculate are called mothers." -- Abigail Van Buren
"Better to be deprived of food for three days, than tea for one." -- Chinese proverb
I'm with Guy #2 - I can't WAIT to be a parent!
________________________________________________
"The secret of dealing successfully with a child is not to be its parent." -- Mel Lazarus
"Women who miscalculate are called mothers." -- Abigail Van Buren
"Better to be deprived of food for three days, than tea for one." -- Chinese proverb
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Re: Some words of truth... January 09, 2009 |
lariousStargate and parenting truth...whatta combination! What episode was this from?
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