Can't get a decent workout at the YMCA? Don't have children!

2:30 PM - 3:00 PM Saturday at the local YMCA.

I swipe my card at the door, get a key for a locker in the ladies locker room. As soon as I enter the locker room what do I hear?:

Woman, aged about 25-35: I couldn't get my half hour workout. Instead I got 20 minutes. You know, I picked you up from your volleyball practice, all I wanted was a half hour. I have to drive you to tennis practice now? Why now? I am sick of not having any time for a decent workout.

I peek around the corner and see two pre-teen girls quietly sitting on the bench listening to her. I quickly lock up my handbag before going upstairs to the cardio room.

Seriously, either get your kids in one activity alone so you can have time for a workout, or have your dipweed husband/boyfriend drive the girls to their activities.

Breeders

Breeders
You don't have to be down
I said breeders
Lift your tits off the ground

How sad that somebody's life has to be ruled by two underage, ungrateful lumps of flesh. I think I'll have another glass of wine to erase the thought. I can do that, you know, because I'm not a goddamn kiddie chauffeur .

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"[GFG's pregnancy is] kind of like at the stables where that one dumb, ugly-ass mare broke out of her corral one day and got herself screwed by the equally fugly colt that was due to be gelded the same afternoon."- Shiny

Another case of a Moo who doesn't plan ahead or budget her time properly. She knows what time the brats' practices are in advance, so if she doesn't have time for a workout it's her own damned fault.:bedmadelie

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If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!

Hmm. Last I checked, the ADULT is in charge of the scheduling. Her fault for over-programming her kids. No sympathy.

It's the mother's fault. If she wants time to herself, she should tell her kids, "One activity at a time." and then make them choose.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! so glad it would never be me!

:Violin

Martyr moo needs to STFU.

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felisdomestica
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! so glad it would never be me!

My sentiments exactly in such situations.

I've found I've actually started laughing audibly sometimes, I need to watch that.

I find the older I get, the more my self-censoring control in my brain ceases to function. I've been growling at moos in grocery stores just under my breath. Someday I'll be that 70-year-old crazy lady with a walker, screaming "you fucking cunt" at stroller-pushers in the parking lot.

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"[GFG's pregnancy is] kind of like at the stables where that one dumb, ugly-ass mare broke out of her corral one day and got herself screwed by the equally fugly colt that was due to be gelded the same afternoon."- Shiny

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randomcfchick
Hmm. Last I checked, the ADULT is in charge of the scheduling. Her fault for over-programming her kids. No sympathy.

I hear so much about all the activities kids are in these days and to me it sounds like a terrible way to live. I had very few when I was a kid in fact, there were some school years I had none at all. I think sometimes these kids would be better off if they just had some free time to sit and watch TV or listen to music. I spent a lot of time doing those things and I turned out fine.

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gymrat
It's the mother's fault. If she wants time to herself, she should tell her kids, "One activity at a time." and then make them choose.

This is what my mom did. I had two activities going during the school year: piano lessons and dance class. If I wanted to add something new, I had to choose one to get rid of. I didn't do any activities during the summer.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________
"Not every ejaculation deserves a name" - George Carlin

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Miss_Hannigan
I find the older I get, the more my self-censoring control in my brain ceases to function. I've been growling at moos in grocery stores just under my breath. Someday I'll be that 70-year-old crazy lady with a walker, screaming "you fucking cunt" at stroller-pushers in the parking lot.

z

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juklinwaro
:Violin

Martyr moo needs to STFU.

This. She is blaming the kids for her lack of control over scheduling? What happened to that CEO prowess regarding multitasking?

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From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
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I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."

I remember, years back, messages on another board where women dithered about which activities would get their kids farther in life. (Dad was rarely involved)

Why extracurricular activities are important

I can see where some activities, geared towards the kid's natural interest and aptitude, would be beneficial, but some of those women were training the kids to be CEOs straight out of diaperhood.

Carlin on kids and activities:

And you'd be anxious and depressed too if you had to put up with these pathetic, insecure, yuppie parents who enroll you in college before you've figured out which side of the playpen smells the worst and then fill you with Ritalin to get you in a mood they approve of, and drag you all over town in search of empty, meaningless structure: Little League, Cub Scouts, swimming, soccer, karate, piano, bagpipes, watercolors, witchcraft, glass blowing, and dildo practice. It's absurd. They even have "play dates", for Christ sake! Playing is now done by appointment! But it's true. A lot of these striving parents are burning their kids out on structure.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I want to pick up a bus full of unruly kids and feed them gummi bears and crack, then turn them loose in Hobby Lobby to ransack the place. They will all be wearing T shirts that say "You Could Have Prevented This."

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navi8orgirl
Carlin on kids and activities:

And you'd be anxious and depressed too if you had to put up with these pathetic, insecure, yuppie parents who enroll you in college before you've figured out which side of the playpen smells the worst and then fill you with Ritalin to get you in a mood they approve of, and drag you all over town in search of empty, meaningless structure: Little League, Cub Scouts, swimming, soccer, karate, piano, bagpipes, watercolors, witchcraft, glass blowing, and dildo practice. It's absurd. They even have "play dates", for Christ sake! Playing is now done by appointment! But it's true. A lot of these striving parents are burning their kids out on structure.

George Carlin was a genius.

When I was a kid, I preferred doing my own thing. My parents tried to cram one thing down my throat and all it did was make me dislike it more. They'd tell everyone how much I loved it, when I didn't, and even as an adult, they still bragged about that, which never made sense to me. One summer, they denied me every interest I had for this one thing, in the hopes that I'd learn to love it, but it never worked, only made me want less and less to do with it.

Once they stopped, I never did it again, and that's the way I like it.

JD

I bet you anything the kid doesn't want to be in at least one of those activities. I've been seeing more often than not, it's not the kids who want to do these goddamn things. It's Moo and Duh making them do it. Maybe Moo hates her kid - she'll stick them in a sport or three to get them out of her hair, but then bitch when practice interferes with her own schedule.

I think I was in Brownies (which I guess is Girl Scouts Lite) for maybe three weeks, but I quit because it was stupid and everyone else had a ton of badges and I didn't have any. I was never involved in any activity because I'm sure my mother didn't want me having any form of freedom and had no money to let me do anything, so I sat home on my ass all the time and watched TV. There wasn't much I'd have wanted to do anyway - fat kids usually can't tap dance or do gymnastics too well. I was forced to go to swimming lessons, but I often pretended to forget my swimsuit because I knew how to fucking swim and I was being forced to swim underwater and retrieve bricks and leap off the diving board. Since, you know, those are things you need to know to survive in the water.

Anyway, that's another story. Honestly, I'm amazed the Moo in this story is working out at all; that's something you usually don't hear Moos talking about. But if she wants a half an hour to exercise, then she needs to learn to plan a little better. I'm sure the day is not THAT busy that there aren't 30 minutes together during which she can attempt to work out. But hey, this is the shit that happens when you decide to spawn, and it's no one's fault but your own.

In fourth grade we were allowed to "choose' a musical instrument to learn. I was absolutely crazy about taking drum lessons. My parents said absolutely not. "It's just something to bang on!" crowed my mother. So I was manipulated into taking violin lessons. Why? Because we already had a violin, and they wouldn't have to buy it! Boy, were they sorry. Two years of scritching and scratching my way through "twinkle twinkle little star" later, they all but begged me to quit! Haha! To this day, I am pissed about their not letting me take up drums. I KNOW I would've stuck with it!

I really hate the moo cunts that bitch at their kids in public and for two reasons. One, this is humiliating for the kids. My moo did that to me from the time I was five until I quit speaking to her at 29. Second, it's her own damn fault for not scheduling time. I think it's also a way for moo to put it's kids on a guilt trip. "See how much I do for you?" If I had to listen to that for any length of time I would tell her to shove it.

I agree with today's kids being overscheduled - parents do that to 1.) keep their kids out of trouble and 2.) hope the sport "develops" the kid.

My dear late mother, whatever problems she had, liked being involved in the activities I was in as a kid. I'd have to place Girl Scouts as being #1, mainly because my mother was a Girl Scout leader for many years (she was a Girl Scout too when she was little). Then dance lessons (I did everything from ballet to tap, jazz, modern) which I adored and still practice at because it has kept my figure over the years (yes I wear the same size clothing as I did when I was 20 and I am now 45: size 8). Yet my mother was also a firm believer that children need "alone time" for personal development. I see way too many kids today who do not have that time and I am sure it doesn't help them. Children are supposed to explore the world around them at home, in their yard, without being on some schedule.

In my pre-teens I became involved with volunteer work as my mother was a member of the local Library Friends group. For me it was an absolute TREAT to organize the books and have first dibs on buying books to read. Oh yes, both my mother and I came home with quite a few books and plenty of reference books which I grew to love. One I still own is "The New Wonder World" with its genuine leather covers dyed in rich jewel-tone colors.

If today's parents would only wise up and stop giving their kids nervous breakdowns with the overscheduling nonsense.

Sounds like moo is another one of those voluntarily narcissistic mothers-of-daughters that are a dime-a-dozen these days. If the brats were the opposite gender, she wouldn't even be narcissistic to begin with.

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Miss Hannigan
I find the older I get, the more my self-censoring control in my brain ceases to function. I've been growling at moos in grocery stores just under my breath.

What I do in grocery stores is flip the little shitlings the bird when moo or duh isn't looking. They just stare at me as they haven't yet grasped the concept of being insulted or snarked on. When I'm feeling particularly mean, I mutter something like "little turd" or "little fucker" under my breath while passing them, or even growl at them demonically.

I don't think I have a lick of musical talent, but I would have loved to play drums or saxophone...or at least tried. I wish I knew how to sing too. I also would have liked to take a martial art for self defense purposes; I'd rather have the know-how and never need it than not have it and find myself in a situation where I need to protect myself and can't. But instruments = $$$$ and fat kids probably can't kick too well. I think I'm too old and broke to do this shit now.

And this is why I had to find alternative sources of entertainment, usually alongside my cousin (who was involved in a lot of stuff, from tap/jazz to cheerleading to basketball to singing). This is why we'd do shit like cover the entire driveway in chalk drawings, or take wild berries and crush them in a bucket and throw them against all the trees in the yard (and later had to explain why all the trees were magenta), or record ourselves screaming, burping and farting using blank cassettes and a boom box (we thought this was hilarious). I'm amazed to this day CPS or the police were not called to my house as a kid with how much we screamed. Those are just a few of the many stupid things we did to amuse ourselves.

I digress. It isn't hard to work schedules out - it requires a little time and effort, both things Moos seem to not want to put forth. I'm sure this Moo doesn't work, so WTF else could she possibly have to do? Why can't she do her precious half-assed workout when the princesses are at school?

My parents tried to mold me into a well-rounded young lady.

Ballet? The teacher threw me out. Seriously, she told my mom I should just quit.
Piano? Bored. Teacher ate lunch and took phone calls during my private class time.
Tennis? Was in way over my head learning with high school kids.

My folks gave up on enriching my dumb ass, and I drew comic books and started fires in the backyard instead, until the day I discovered booze.

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"[GFG's pregnancy is] kind of like at the stables where that one dumb, ugly-ass mare broke out of her corral one day and got herself screwed by the equally fugly colt that was due to be gelded the same afternoon."- Shiny

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selidororous
I agree with today's kids being overscheduled - parents do that to 1.) keep their kids out of trouble and 2.) hope the sport "develops" the kid.

meh, I wish my parents pushed me into one of those activities when I was a kid... they didn't. I was too busy studying. my mom especially were very concerned about my academical achievements so that she thought any other activities would ruin my grades, and my dad were sort of old-fashioned he's so afraid I would want to be an athlete or a painter if I chose those activities, because athlete or painter are not 'real jobs'. thankfully they still let me play with neighboring kids, so I didn't become extremely bad at socializing.

probably forced to do nothing is still a little better than forced to do activities you absolutely hate, like kids nowadays do. eh, even when I was still a brat, I had several friends with helicopter parents who forced them to do everything from academic tutorial to violin lesson.

good thing they let me do whatever the fuck I want to do as a hobby now.

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Cambion
I was forced to go to swimming lessons, but I often pretended to forget my swimsuit because I knew how to fucking swim and I was being forced to swim underwater and retrieve bricks and leap off the diving board. Since, you know, those are things you need to know to survive in the water.

Believe it or not, the thing my parents were trying to force on me was swimming. They insisted that it was not possible to not like swimming because everybody swims. They were determined that was I going to give up all of my other interests and only want to swim. There were times when I would be in the pool 4-6 hours a day, sometimes more.

One summer all I was allowed to do was swim. I wasn't allowed to watch TV, listen to the radio or my music, read except for swimming books, just sit around waiting for my sister to decide it was time to go swimming and wasn't allowed to even discuss it. I guess they were determined to purge all non-swimming thoughts from my head because after all, there is nothing worse in all of creation than a non swimmer.

JD