We CF introverts figured this one out...

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Scary Mommy Confession
They should warn you about becoming a mom if you're an introvert. So not cut out for this when all I want is to be left the fuck alone 99% of the time.

Gee, how many introverts on this site list their introversion as a reason to skip being a parent?

I know it's one reason (of many) for me. I am social and friendly, LOVE spending time with family and loved ones...but I HAVE to recharge via quiet time. I'm not shy or antisocial at all...just introverted. People use up my energy.

Children (especially small ones) are exhausting for ANYone. Being an introvert has got to make parenthood a gorillian times worse.

I am an extrovert, and love being around people. That's not the reason I went CF.

I have sensory issues that make large crowds, especially said crowds with screaming crotch crickets, difficult to impossible to endure. I don't mean the kind of lice you get in your crotch, but they may as well as they are an infestation.

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Passive Aggressive
Master Of Anti-brat
Excuses!

Hahahaha, that didn't occur to her before she dropped a flesh loaf? :drool

I'm shy and VERY introverted, and I LOVE being alone. I can't think of a single time I've felt lonely, but I get tired of people, even the ones I really like, really fucking fast. Like craftyzits, I also have sensory issues and screaming kyds, especially baybees, are the absolute WORST stimuli for me. Me with a kyd would be a ticking time bomb.

I am like you too, Random.

I don't know if I'm exactly an introvert or extrovert. I have to deal with people work wise, including functioning in a sales capacity. At times I have to make presentations for large groups. This does not bother me.

I do not like crowds or noise. Or boring crap. Perhaps what it is, is - I like dealing with people if there's some kind of mentally engaging subject involved.

I do not like to be pestered with inane blather either. Talk to me, fine. Do not pester me with BS. As little kids do.

It's funny because I"m an extrovert, and it works both ways. I want to spend my life living it up with my friends, kindred spirits, and out having adventures, not being chained down to the home-oriented lifestyle of "family time" (with people I might not even like). Don't get me wrong, visiting my parents/grandparents/uncles/etc is something I see as important, but I do not want to have my constant, daily life cut off from everyone but "fambly," missing out on all the fun. NO THANKS.

Edit: Of course, introverts have fun too, but what I mean is, I look at all the people with small kids, and their spouse/kids are the extent of their social life. They never go out. Their prime Friday and Saturday nights are always spent doing boring household-oriented shit and going to sleep by 10pm while becoming frumpy at an early age. NO THANKS!!

I'm hesitant to even get married or have a live-in partner, let alone have a child that I can't kick out for 18 years. Hell, one of the reasons I live at home is that with my current wage, it's impossible to live on my own and I'm not moving out just to live with other people. At least at home, I can be left the fuck alone and not interact with anybody for days. Last time I moved out, I lived with 7 other people in order to have an affordable living situation. Not doing that again. Especially since they were prone to having parties, my room was downstairs next to the kitchen and near the bathroom, and my door did not lock (I'm trying to sleep and I've got people barging in thinking my room is the bathroom).

When I imagine my life, it's in a Craftsman-style bungalow with a couple of dogs and nobody else. Nobody's bothering me and I can do things as I please, when I please. And it's as loud or as quiet as I want it to be.

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"Why children take so long to grow? They eat and drink like pig and give nothing back. Must find way to accelerate process..."
- Dr. Yi Suchong, Bioshock

"Society does not need more children; but it does need more loved children. Quite literally, we cannot afford unloved children - but we pay heavily for them every day. There should not be the slightest communal concern when a woman elects to destroy the life of her thousandth-of-an-ounce embryo. But all society should rise up in alarm when it hears that a baby that is not wanted is about to be born."
- Garrett Hardin

"I feel like there's a message involved here somehow, but then I couldn't stop laughing at all the plotholes, like the part when North Korea has food."
- Youtube commentor referring to a North Korean cartoon.

"Reality is a bitch when it slowly crawls out of your vagina and shits in your lap."
- Reddit comment

"Bitch wants a baby, so we're gonna fuck now. #bareback"
- Cambion

Oh whatever. Abortion doctors are crimestoppers."
- Miss Hannigan

see now im an introvert, and the independent type, I worked in retail during the day, and at night I enjoyed coming home to the peace and quiet of my empty home and old cat, once or twice a week i'd see friends or family for a couple of hours, then back to my solitude.

while avoiding excessive unnessicary noise is one of the reasons I wont be having kids, being an introvert is not one of them. scared of commitment is also not one of my reasons, I took a long time to let my boyfriend move in with me, even though he tried sooner multiple times, because of his background, I didn't want him to just move in, things to go sour, or want kids and him to try to take me for everything I own as a common law marriage/defacto relationship, it also took a long time to get used to having a person directly impacting what and when I do things.

its called using my brain to weigh up the risks between pro's and cons. just the same I have many reasons why I wouldn't have kids, and the cons outweigh the pro's.

one of my friends always says that if she hadn't had 3 large male dogs first, she probly would have jumped right into having kids, she's and extrovert, knows dogs arnt kids, because kids are much more effort and trouble to look after.

but she put it bluntly like this,
having 3 big dogs a few months to years apart, ment nearly endless tolite training over 2 years, cleaning up vomit, piss and poop, things being destroyed, constaint fighting, frequent trips to the vet for said fighting, much of her spare time taken up with food prep, grooming, exercise, entertainment, puppy school, if she could have done anything differently, she would have stuck to little dogs who atleast get worn out after a 45min walk, take 10 mins to bath and don't cost so much at the vet.

if she had kids first, she still would have got dogs, but knowing how much more responsibility and longer lived kids are, after having pets she seriously wondered if she was cut out to be a perant, and hasn't made any hedgeway either side of the fence she's now sitting on.

*and yes I know full well, that animals cannot and should not be compaired to kids, but that was just her thoughts as an extroverts perspective*

I told my boyfriend that when we live together (he's on Reserve duty with the Army until he gets back later this year) that he is going to be responsible for making friends. Because I just. can't. even.

Having a brat hanging off of me 24/7 is my idea of hell on earth.

I'm an introvert too, and couldn't imagine having some whiny brat dependent on me 24/7. That would drive me to drink. While I love my husband, I also like the fact that I have a lot of alone time in the house to do what I want during the week. It is peaceful and relaxing.

I don't know WHY an introvert would want to procreate in the first place? These idiots have no sense of self-awareness at all. They must think it's going to be all fine and dandy, only to wake up to realize that they are living in a hell that they created. No thank you!

I'm very introverted - most people just get on my nerves. They don't even need to say or do anything; just them being there irritates me. Can't imagine how on edge I'd be with a brat constantly following me around and demanding attention. I'd say it'd drive me to drink, but I already drink pretty heavily, so what on earth would being a parent drive me to?

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mypersonality.info

"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who haven't got it."
George Bernard Shaw

"An oyster can play catch if u only give it the oprotunity"
Some random YouTube commenter

"hate comments will be deleted!! fuckers!"
Some random YouTube uploader

Hummm... animals not being compared to kyds? Okay.. but there's a thin line to walk. Since both are a responsibility.. raising, nurturing, protecting, loving.... there are comparisons.

The people at my vet are constantly calling me 'mom' when they talk to me about my girls They stay away from 'owner'. They think of all of their clients as 'pet parents'.. and call the dogs and cats 'kids' Kind of enjoyable really. Lots of other things I love about my vet and the clinic but that one kind of stands out.

I'm extroverted to people who I know well such as co-workers and regular customers. I sometimes get into my introverted phases. I'm introverted to strangers or when I go shopping at another store.

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starlady
Hummm... animals not being compared to kyds? Okay.. but there's a thin line to walk. Since both are a responsibility.. raising, nurturing, protecting, loving.... there are comparisons.

The people at my vet are constantly calling me 'mom' when they talk to me about my girls They stay away from 'owner'. They think of all of their clients as 'pet parents'.. and call the dogs and cats 'kids' Kind of enjoyable really. Lots of other things I love about my vet and the clinic but that one kind of stands out.

My vet is funny, she thinks all the animals are beautiful and calls them handsome, or gorgeous, she said my friends poodle looked "ravishing" with her new clip - lol. She called a lizard - exquisite. :cool

As far as introversion, I get exhausted dealing with people I don't know. I hate it but that is how it is. A kid would tire me out for sure but it would be having to deal with the other parents and activities, school stuff that would wear on me.

I hit 100% introversion when I did the myers-briggs. Sometimes I could just kick myself for getting married. My husband is quiet and introverted, too. In fact, he's one of the easiest people I've ever lived with (as compared to my brother. Wow, he can drain a person of energy!). But it's like another poster mentioned above, it's just a person's presence that kills the entire mood. Sometimes when I get a couple hundred $$$s stashed away I will take a long weekend and just go stay at a hotel -alone- ; just me, a pile of books and some tea to make in the weeny little hotel room coffee maker smile

And yes, I've considered how much I would detest having a child stuck in orbit around me for 18 years. Not gonna happen.

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stillwaters
I hit 100% introversion when I did the myers-briggs. Sometimes I could just kick myself for getting married. My husband is quiet and introverted, too. In fact, he's one of the easiest people I've ever lived with (as compared to my brother. Wow, he can drain a person of energy!). But it's like another poster mentioned above, it's just a person's presence that kills the entire mood. Sometimes when I get a couple hundred $$$s stashed away I will take a long weekend and just go stay at a hotel -alone- ; just me, a pile of books and some tea to make in the weeny little hotel room coffee maker smile

And yes, I've considered how much I would detest having a child stuck in orbit around me for 18 years. Not gonna happen.

I've done the Myers-Brigg 3 times over the course of 14 years (twice for psychology classes and once for a different thing I can't remember). I've had 99%, 100%, and 98% introversion on them. I had my BFF for a roommate for quite a few years - and she is completely extroverted. She learned to leave me to my room on most nights, and I let her borrow my car to go to dance clubs or hang out with other people. I also did mostly online classes, which was fantastic until they started requiring you to participate in "discussions."

I think if I ever enter into a LTR/marriage, I'll have to do something similar to you, or else I'll have to have my own (soundproof!) room with a lock on the door.

A family member, whom I'm extremely close to, was just here for a week, and while she is one of the sweetest, kindest, most giving people I know - she is also one of those people who cannot be alone. I was pulling my hair out and crying in bed by the end of the week. And she was an adult who could fend for herself. A kyd? Fuck that. I can honestly understand how some moos go berserk and off their sprogs and/or themselves. Even just getting past the toadler stage sounds like a death sentence to me, and that's nowhere close to 18+ years of it. And if you get a defecto that will never be able to leave? Hell I want to jump in front on a train just thinking about it.

"Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live." - Oscar Wilde

Another introvert here. Much like shy lurker, I open up more around friends, but keep to myself and am quiet anywhere else. If I go to a cafe by myself, I'm totally content to sit and draw while I drink my coffee. Unfortunately, this often invites passing comments like "OMG you're so good!" and "How do you do that?" I mean, the gushing is nice for the ego and all, but sometimes I just want to draw in peace, goddammit. And I can handle being around people for a while; I'll go crash on my buddy's floor for a week now and then, but I think it also helps that he goes to work during the day and I can have time alone to laze around and play with the cats before he gets home and we're not constantly in one another's presence. And I know my presence wears on his patience too. Doesn't mean you don't care about the person, but it can be draining mentally to be around others in general for too long. My fuse with loved ones is much longer than my fuse with strangers and the general public. I have no fuse with kids.

I also like being able to have a break from people and recharge. Being around others is tiring and I do like being able to be by myself and take a nap, play a game, read/write/draw or just do stuff I want to do without interruption for a little while.

You can't do that with a fuckin' kid around because they need constant attention, either just because kids crave attention naturally or because they'll get into trouble if you don't watch their asses every second. An introvert might want to crawl in their room and be alone for a little while, but if you do that with a brat, you'll come out to find Bratleigh pouring a whole bottle of vegetable oil into the carpet, shit smeared on the couch, your keys cooking in the toaster, and the TV covered in your twelve-dollar salon shampoo. I couldn't do that. Sometimes you just want "you" time and you don't want to have to try and arrange for a sitter beforehand. Makes me wonder if all those Moos who dump their kids in stores and come back four hours later are actually introverts. They just couldn't take the brat any longer and left it somewhere "safe" so they could be alone for a while.

My introversion is one of many reason I'm CF. I cannot be around people for extended periods of time without some kind of a break. I know I couldn't take having a kid around 24/7 going "Mommy mommy mommy mommy" about everything every ten seconds. I'd strangle the fucker.

I sort of straddle the introvert/extrovert line, depending on when I take the test, although I think fundamentally I'm more of an introvert because these periods last longer. My SO and I happily spend evenings with each of us in our respective offices (this is why we have a 3-bedroom place) doing our own thing, interrupting just to deliver cups of tea. I also get some solitude in the mornings, when I wake up early just so I'll get some time to myself before I have to interact with anyone.

When I stay with someone, and I have to be 'on' for a solid week, I start to get very irritable. It's not as bad when someone visits and I can retreat into my own space, but when I'm staying somewhere and my sleeping place is a more public area, like the living room, I just reach a point where everything gets on my nerves.

Since I didn't really think about having kids I can't claim I factored this into my decision, but if I think about some person always being there demanding my attention, I cringe. It doesn't improve when they get older, either: teenagers may not want your time and attention, but they do have a way of trying to thrust themselves into a space and aggressively express ownership of it. It all sounds extremely unpleasant.

This is why I enjoy that 3 weeks to a month I get to go to Nova Scotia in the summer. Just me and the dogs... driving... no hubby. Small room in a house on the ocean. Just me and the dogs. Ahhhh... I love it.

I am also glad that my dh works long hours. Our time together is very nice... but I love the 'alone time'. Lots of people wonder 'dont' you get bored?' What? I don't know the meaning of the word.

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starlady
This is why I enjoy that 3 weeks to a month I get to go to Nova Scotia in the summer. Just me and the dogs... driving... no hubby. Small room in a house on the ocean. Just me and the dogs. Ahhhh... I love it.

That sounds wonderful.

I'm an introvert, too (so's Mr S) and our work (computer-based) is highly conducive to our natures - I cannot imagine having a crotchsnot hanging around me at all

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mumofsixbirds
While I love my husband, I also like the fact that I have a lot of alone time in the house to do what I want during the week. It is peaceful and relaxing.

I don't know WHY an introvert would want to procreate in the first place? These idiots have no sense of self-awareness at all. They must think it's going to be all fine and dandy, only to wake up to realize that they are living in a hell that they created. No thank you!

Yes, that's how Mr. Random and I are, too. We have a great marriage & LOVE spending time together, whether it's just chilling out reading at home, or playing video games, or going out on the town. But both of us need separate time, too. We don't always socialize as a couple...he'll go out with friends while I chill out at home, or vice versa. And sometimes I'll be driving home from work and think, "Oh yeah, he and L are hanging out together! Time for pizza, Netflix, and video games!".

If we had kids together, neither of he nor I would ever get those nice days alone.

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paragon schnitzophonic
I'm hesitant to even get married or have a live-in partner, let alone have a child that I can't kick out for 18 years. Hell, one of the reasons I live at home is that with my current wage, it's impossible to live on my own and I'm not moving out just to live with other people. At least at home, I can be left the fuck alone and not interact with anybody for days. Last time I moved out, I lived with 7 other people in order to have an affordable living situation. Not doing that again. Especially since they were prone to having parties, my room was downstairs next to the kitchen and near the bathroom, and my door did not lock (I'm trying to sleep and I've got people barging in thinking my room is the bathroom).

When I imagine my life, it's in a Craftsman-style bungalow with a couple of dogs and nobody else. Nobody's bothering me and I can do things as I please, when I please. And it's as loud or as quiet as I want it to be.

Marry me.

My husband is very introverted and I wonder if this is part of the reason he is childfree.

I'm an extrovert but I am very sensitive to loud noises, especially if they are prolonged and repetitive.

I recently visited my best friend and she has two kids. Her youngest daughter SCREAMS like a banshee.

I wanted to kill myself after 30 mins of that.

@ exile -

Ah but you're a Hot Rodder / Car Fan also

If I would bump into you at a Car Show I'm sure we'd have much to discuss wink

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Cambion
My introversion is one of many reason I'm CF. I cannot be around people for extended periods of time without some kind of a break. I know I couldn't take having a kid around 24/7 going "Mommy mommy mommy mommy" about everything every ten seconds. I'd strangle the fucker.

That "Mommy Mommy Mommy..." shit drives me insane. In my case it would be, "Daddy," but still just as irritating.

I think that happens, in part, because that's just what very young children do. But I also think it's encouraged by parents who respond with their full attention every single time a kid does that, even if he/she is doing it for no good reason.

I can distinctly remember my own mother saying, "Stop nagging me!" to myself and my brother, and she meant business. None of this "Mommy... Mommy... Mommy... " stuff.