Keeping secrets from lovers

Rusky Wrote:
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> That sound like a breeder pleaser statement.

It's not breeder-pleasing (christ, I HATE THEM!), it's simply stating biological REALITY. If she wants to have kids, she has the right to - therefore, he should be honest with her so she has time to find a man who WILL want kids too, instead of stringing her along until it's too late for her.

Ketchup Wrote:
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> Rusky,
>
> LOL - you are awesome! Ever thought about writing
> an advice book?

Ditto on that one! Rusky, you said it as it is! :yr

The young hot shaved ones are the worst. I worked with one in a call center: drop-dead gorgeous and the like. She even had one of the IT guys on the third floor interested in her. Look...there was a caste system between us on the call center floors (1st and 2nd) and IT on the 3rd foor. No...Girl is not interested but keeps giving it to this wannabe-Rasta guy on the account we all worked. She gets knocked up and is no longer the hot shaved girl. I can only imagine what her life is like two years later at age 21. Rasta is probably hiding out so not to pay the child support.

I am all for men and women getting snipped on the sly. No one owes anyone that sort of "total honesty". It is really better if a person just cuts someone loose if they do not want to breed but secrecy about sterilization is better than being "oopsed". I also have no issue of a woman aborting without telling a man. I know from experience how a man will try to tell the lady how the baby will be so wonderful and how he will actually...*gasp*...help out...oh, how fucking generous!

Once the preggo test came up positive 13 years ago, I knew I was going to abort from that failed tubal. No amount of convincing was going to make me a man's moo for his ego. Fucker had the nerve to say how he wished he could get me pregnant even though I had mentioned the tubal. It was all about ego and control despite how he had his ex-wife abort many times since b/c was not easily obtainable in the countries where they lived.

As for the issue about older women, Non-PC, it is best to stay away from them as well. I am 43 and never EVER thought of a younger man. Why??? Personally as a female, I feel it is degrading. Most young men feel the "old broad" should feel grateful for their interest. Another thing is how I have seen how some older women start the jealousy act as they cannot compete against the younger shipment of cuties and try to lock a young guy into "commitment" when he is really starting to live his life. Also...there are some younger guys who look at older gals who are earning good $$$ as "sugar mamas". I also never wanted to be someone's "mommy" as many young guys act with their older "girlfriends".

I doubt you are that sort as you date all kinds of women but I am only speaking of my own experience on the issue. Do protect yourself. If asked about kids, be honest about it. Women who like you for you will be the ones to stick around. If a broad gets PO'd over birth control questions, you are lucky that the "mood" was ruined before something starts cooking in their ovens.

"Can any of you other CFers relate to this? Any advice? Do I just keep going as usual and finding out by asking the crucial questions (and more often than not, face rejection) or is there a particular method or strategy I should look at?"

Depends on what you want...if you want to just "dip your pen" so to speak, then you'll never have to have an uncomfortable discussion. Get fixed, use a condom, hop from bed to bed and chances are you won't ever have to have a serious discussion about life goals, and desires. A fun time will be had by all, I'm sure. If children do come up, you have been seeing that person too long, and should be man enough to say "I'm sterile, and don't want children." If that's a deal-breaker for the other person, so be it.

If you want a long term relationship with a CF woman, you have to find one first, and the best way to do that is...talking. You could increase your chances of finding a CF woman by engaging in activities where you might find women (I always recommend volunteering). You and the women would be pursuing a similar interest and possibly have time to talk in a more casual manner about your lives, thusly making it easier for you to figure out who is baby rabid, and who couldn't care less about the children. Unfortunately, there really is no way to know someone without, you know, getting to know them.

"It truly is the one commonality that every designation of humans you can think of has, there's at least one asshole."
--Me

sorry i am late in replying, but i have to post this

http://www.reason.com/news/show/29035.html

you dont have to be a father, or even meet the woman, or live in the same state, or do anything, so long as your name is on the child support, thats it. you are legally the father, even if your snipped, even if your sterile.

i quote from that site

**Tony Pierce remembers vividly the exact moment in November 2000 when the state of California began trampling on his life. "There was a loud angry pounding at my door at five o'clock in the morning," he recalls. "Very scary."

It was a female police officer with a complaint accusing him of being the father of an 8-year-old girl in Contra Costa County, east of San Francisco. "I'm like, 'Great! I'm definitely not the father of anybody,'" he says.

There were excellent reasons to think so. He had never met or heard of the mother of the child. He had never lived in Northern California, and at the time of conception (spring 1991) he was attending the University of California at Santa Barbara, beginning a monogamous relationship that would last for two years. What's more, he's a condom fanatic -- only once in his life, Pierce swears, has he failed to use a rubber during intercourse, and that was "many years after." (He's been a friend of mine for 15 years, and I believe him.) And if the summons had included the mother's testimony (it was supposed to, but did not), he would have seen himself described as a "tall" and "dark" black man named "Anthony Pierce." Pierce is a hair over five feet, nine inches; he is so light-skinned that even people who know him sometimes don't realize he's black; and no one calls him Anthony except his mom.

Dad Blamed
What Pierce didn't realize, and what nearly 10 million American men have discovered to their chagrin since the welfare reform legislation of 1996, is that when the government accuses you of fathering a child, no matter how flimsy the evidence, you are one month away from having your life wrecked. Federal law gives a man just 30 days to file a written challenge; if he doesn't, he is presumed guilty. And once that steamroller of justice starts rolling, dozens of statutory lubricants help make it extremely difficult, and prohibitively expensive, to stop -- even, in most cases, if there's conclusive DNA proof that the man is not the child's father.



** now men TAKE HEED. and they wonder why men are hating women.


and it gets worse

**If the father falls 30 days behind on his payments, he will be blocked by law from receiving or renewing a driver's license or any "authorization issued by a board that allows a person to engage in a business, occupation, or profession" -- a category that includes teaching credentials, fishing licenses, and state bar memberships. If his credit rating was good, it won't be any more. If his past-due tab exceeds $5,000, the U.S. State Department won't issue him a passport. (An average of 60 Americans discover this each day. Meanwhile, Congress has been pushing to cut the limit to $2,500, while urging the State Department to begin revoking passports, which is allowed under the law.)

**
so not only can you be the "father" to a child you never even saw the mother, you havent even lived in the same state as them, never left. your life is ruined. no driving licence, no passport, no credit.

**Counties typically launch paternity investigations for one of two reasons: Either a parent or custodian directly asks for help in locating a biological parent, or a mother applies for welfare, which now is reported to the local child support system. If the mother was unwed, says California DCSS Assistant Director Leora Gerhenzon, "you ask about when you became pregnant, why you believe that date is correct, whether or not the father was named on the birth certificate, has the father seen the child,...does the father provide for support, has he ever lived with the child,...a Social Security number....It's a half-hour [interview], or even an hour and a half to two hours."

What if the only information the mother provides, I ask Gerhenzon, is that it was 10 years ago, with a white guy named Matt Welch, now between 30 and 40 years old, who maybe lives in the Los Angeles area?

"In that case, now it depends," she says. "We run our search on him; if we come back with one Matt Welch who lives in L.A., whose birthday fits that 10-year range, and we have nobody else, we presume in general we have the person. If we come back with three Matt Welches, all of a sudden we know there's a problem. We have to call her back in, or call her on the phone, and say 'OK, here's what we've pulled up. We need more help from you to identify which is the correct [one].'"

So a name, race, vague location, and a broad age range is sufficient to launch a process that could quickly lead to a default judgment, asset liens, and a blocked passport? "Right. Right," Gerhenzon confirms. "If it's clear that she's given us enough identifying information to come up with one discrete name, we would go ahead." Wouldn't that make people with unusual names easier targets? "Absolutely."**

*********************************************************************************************************************************
I just post the stories, for interest.. for everyone

Lord, what fools these mortals be!
- A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Act III, Scene ii

Voltaire said: "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."

H.L.Mencken wrote:"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. Albert Einstein

*If I stood in a lady's restroom and asked all of the visitors if they had a penis, most if not all, would say no.*

OK, then, ask them if they want kids. What do you think most will say? Come on, dude. Just look at this thread.

Guest Wrote:
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> *If I stood in a lady's restroom and asked all of
> the visitors if they had a penis, most if not all,
> would say no.*
>
> OK, then, ask them if they want kids. What do you
> think most will say? Come on, dude. Just look at
> this thread.


Many women will say "no" to that question re: wanting kids just to bag a guy.

Amethusos said: "Once the preggo test came up positive 13 years ago, I knew I was going to abort from that failed tubal. No amount of convincing was going to make me a man's moo for his ego. Fucker had the nerve to say how he wished he could get me pregnant even though I had mentioned the tubal."

Amethusos, I've heard enough stories like yours about "failed" tubal ligations and vasectomies resulting in unplanned pregnancies that it makes me wonder. How on earth does something like that "fail" when performed properly? I can't buy that. Could it be that some doctors are not actually doing the snip while telling their patients it was done?

I could easily envision some breeder-sympathetic doctor doing a phony operation to make the patient think she/he is sterile when all he did was make an incision under anesthesia, monkey around a bit, then close the incision, leaving the patient fertile as ever. Wouldn't the poop hit the fan if this were discovered to be a widespread practice!

You know k-man, you're not alone. I wonder the same thing myself. I’m planning on getting fixed in the near future, and I’ve decided I’ll only find a doctor who seems to be objective and not going on and on with the typical bingos. That doc might be tough to find, but still.

k-man Wrote:
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> Amethusos, I've heard enough stories like yours
> about "failed" tubal ligations and vasectomies
> resulting in unplanned pregnancies that it makes
> me wonder. How on earth does something like that
> "fail" when performed properly? I can't buy that.
> Could it be that some doctors are not actually
> doing the snip while telling their patients it was
> done?

When I had the x-ray done by the doc who did the 2nd tubal to find out what failed, it was found that one of the fallopian tubes had "grown back" where the laser method was done. The laser method is the worst as the tubes can look charred but still have active cells inside if not burned enough. I would not be surprised if forced birth breeder docs do a shitty job on vasectomies and tubal ligations to try to force reluctant patients into those babies. The second ob-gyn did the clamp-and-twist method which scars the tubes as well. That was done over eleven years ago. Another thing is I was 23 when I had the first one done. I read somewhere how these things can reverse themselves if the method is not as invasive as a younger person can "rebuild" certain cells.

Nour Wrote:
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> You know k-man, you're not alone. I wonder the
> same thing myself. I’m planning on getting fixed
> in the near future, and I’ve decided I’ll only
> find a doctor who seems to be objective and not
> going on and on with the typical bingos. That doc
> might be tough to find, but still.

Planned Parenthood, from what I hear, will direct a person to a doctor who does not give lectures or hassles for a tubal ligation. Try your local PP office when you are ready...

Some PP's will direct you to a sympathetic doctor. I didn't have very good luck with them. They gave me all the regular bingos, and pushed the pill even though I thought I'd made it perfectly clear that I cannot take it.

I'm skeptical of that org. anyway. It's way too male- dominated at the clinic level.

sprogless Wrote:
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> Some PP's will direct you to a sympathetic doctor.
> I didn't have very good luck with them. They gave
> me all the regular bingos, and pushed the pill
> even though I thought I'd made it perfectly clear
> that I cannot take it.
>
> I'm skeptical of that org. anyway. It's way too
> male- dominated at the clinic level.

Jeez...I never knew PP was male-dominated. Gads...to even get bingo'd by a doc who was referred by Planned Parenthood is horrid. I do believe PP may try to be more PC now to get the forced birthers off their backs. Whatever happened to standing up to these fucks?

I think the people at the top are mostly women, but at the clinics that I've been to only the receptionists, and maybe a nurse were women. All the docs were male. With male attitudes regarding women's care. We all know the patronizing, "little woman" bullshit.

I know guys go there too, but if the girls and women are their bread and butter, then wouldn't it make sense to employ women at these clinics? Or, would that somehow give us too much power over our bodies? The status quo of medical care is that women need to be dumb and embarassed about their bodies, and we need male doctors to take care of our reproductive needs, because we don't know any better. Until the paternalism and sexism is taken out of medicine, we'll never be able to ave total control over our bodies. The women doctors are just as bad, in many cases. Not all.

Had to sign a contract stating I wouldn't sue the doc if I wanted to have my vasectomy reversed and it didn't work. There were bolded lines in the contract that state reversing a vasectomy is very new technology and has been done with limited success. I was asked multiple times by the staff if this is really what I wanted to do.

I signed on the dotted line, smiled, and said "cut me".

Been shootin blanks ever since and loving it! I think most of the women I have been with love it too. No worries.

SO has been snipped for over 18 years and needless to say, I LOVE IT!!! When I first met him, one of the first convos we had was about my NOT ever wanting kids.

Shit, why waste time, get it out in the open - if Mr. Dating Prospect does want kids, you can bail immediately and not have to listen to him whine and cry about wanting that almighty BAYBEE. BLEAH.

To isupportsinglemoms, my SO is divorced with 2 grown brats, so I feel your pain. Paying those extortion payments sucks the worst kind of balls there is.

sprogless Wrote:
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> I think the people at the top are mostly women,
> but at the clinics that I've been to only the
> receptionists, and maybe a nurse were women. All
> the docs were male. With male attitudes regarding
> women's care. We all know the patronizing, "little
> woman" bullshit.
>
> I know guys go there too, but if the girls and
> women are their bread and butter, then wouldn't it
> make sense to employ women at these clinics? Or,
> would that somehow give us too much power over our
> bodies?

Firstly, you have to have female gynecologists, which are few and far between. Yes, there are more than in the past, but certainly not many and many seem to end up leaving the field after a couple years to have a family. Then you need to have female gynecologists who are willing to work for less money in a non-profit organization which is another rarity as well, they need to make money to have the family.

Of course, I'm guessing that a lot of this is geographic. In my town, most of the PP docs, nurses and reception staff are female.

"It truly is the one commonality that every designation of humans you can think of has, there's at least one asshole."
--Me

KidFreeLuvnLife Wrote:
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> SO has been snipped for over 18 years and needless
> to say, I LOVE IT!!! When I first met him, one of
> the first convos we had was about my NOT ever
> wanting kids.
>
> Shit, why waste time, get it out in the open - if
> Mr. Dating Prospect does want kids, you can bail
> immediately and not have to listen to him whine
> and cry about wanting that almighty BAYBEE.
> BLEAH.
>
> To isupportsinglemoms, my SO is divorced with 2
> grown brats, so I feel your pain. Paying those
> extortion payments sucks the worst kind of balls
> there is.

Thanks Kidfree, I'm happy to see I am not alone! I'm not sure about the sucking balls part, lol, never tried that, but I do agree those extortion payments are brutal. My kids are older so it won't be much longer until I'm done with that shit.

Isupportsinglemoms Wrote:
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> Thanks Kidfree, I'm happy to see I am not alone!
> I'm not sure about the sucking balls part, lol,
> never tried that, but I do agree those extortion
> payments are brutal. My kids are older so it
> won't be much longer until I'm done with that
> shit.

Divorce and child support laws need to be overhauled. Entitlement-minded feminist legislators and lobbyists have made divorce and/or child support issues a nightmare for men. I can see why many fellows do something "drastic" and risk life in jail to get out of a total financial rape. Even a divorce with NO kids can force a man to either give up his home or lose his retirement account despite the woman being the person who wanted out of the marriage because she was "bored". Most of the time, the child support does not go to the kids. I've worked places where the ex-wife moo would show up in good clothing and have her nails & hair done while the kids were in raggedy clothing. Yet, the father pays out big time every single month.

Feh Wrote:
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> Firstly, you have to have female gynecologists,
> which are few and far between. Yes, there are
> more than in the past, but certainly not many and
> many seem to end up leaving the field after a
> couple years to have a family. Then you need to
> have female gynecologists who are willing to work
> for less money in a non-profit organization which
> is another rarity as well, they need to make money
> to have the family.

I have found some female ob-gyns and other specialists to be as breederific as their male peers. I also used to think a woman doctor was going to be more understanding. Both of my tubals were done by males. I had to switch to a male dermatologist when a female would not give me Accutane back in the late 80's for acne. I already had the first tubal but the dame's reaction was how I may change my mind and want those bay-bees so she would not prescribe the drug for me due to those possible birth defects. I had no problem from the male doc.

amethusos* Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Isupportsinglemoms Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
>
> > Thanks Kidfree, I'm happy to see I am not alone!
>
> > I'm not sure about the sucking balls part, lol,
> > never tried that, but I do agree those
> extortion
> > payments are brutal. My kids are older so it
> > won't be much longer until I'm done with that
> > shit.
>
> Divorce and child support laws need to be
> overhauled. Entitlement-minded feminist
> legislators and lobbyists have made divorce and/or
> child support issues a nightmare for men. I can
> see why many fellows do something "drastic" and
> risk life in jail to get out of a total financial
> rape. Even a divorce with NO kids can force a man
> to either give up his home or lose his retirement
> account despite the woman being the person who
> wanted out of the marriage because she was
> "bored". Most of the time, the child support does
> not go to the kids. I've worked places where the
> ex-wife moo would show up in good clothing and
> have her nails & hair done while the kids were in
> raggedy clothing. Yet, the father pays out big
> time every single month.

Amethusos, I would bet my life that most of the child support I have paid did not go to the children. It makes me sick but there is no law that requires the X bitch to prove that she is using the money on the children. They should enact a law to require these blood sucking bitches to produce receipts of the money spent on the kids. No tickee, no laundry.

Isupportsinglemoms Wrote:
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I would bet my life that most of the
> child support I have paid did not go to the
> children. It makes me sick but there is no law
> that requires the X bitch to prove that she is
> using the money on the children. They should
> enact a law to require these blood sucking bitches
> to produce receipts of the money spent on the
> kids. No tickee, no laundry.

I could NOT agree with you MORE!!!!!!! My SO says the same thing.

amethusos* Wrote:
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> I have found some female ob-gyns and other
> specialists to be as breederific as their male
> peers. I also used to think a woman doctor was
> going to be more understanding. Both of my tubals
> were done by males. I had to switch to a male
> dermatologist when a female would not give me
> Accutane back in the late 80's for acne. I already
> had the first tubal but the dame's reaction was
> how I may change my mind and want those bay-bees
> so she would not prescribe the drug for me due to
> those possible birth defects. I had no problem
> from the male doc.

I think the majority of humans are breederriffic, however after a pap from a female ob-gyn, I've never felt like I'd been punched in the box. Not like anyone needed to know that...

I had a friend on Accutane in the 90's, the pills came in an awesome box with little pictures of a pregnant woman with the big red circle with a slash through it behind each pill. We'd collect those little cardboard "No pregnancy" bits and leave them everywhere. When she got the pills, she asked her doctor about why pregnant women couldn't have them, and the doctor muttered something about birth defects. My friend said "You mean, flipper babies", and the doctor chuckled and said "yes, something like that"

"It truly is the one commonality that every designation of humans you can think of has, there's at least one asshole."
--Me

Thank you again everyone for your inputs. They are all greatly appreciated. What I'm learning here is basically this. People on this board do not seem to have a major issue with covering up birth control. I think the issue here is covering up one's CF desire. I fully understand that. I agree with most of that. I think being open up front about not wanting kids is a good idea. Hiding or covering up birth control used may not be so bad.

After talking to my friend and his GF, I have learned something. At first (as always), he was firm on not having kids. She thought she could "change him". Than she thought if it was not meant to be, it was not meant to be, so she did not bother the subject for a long time. Then, couple of her co-workers got knocked up and spit out kids. That is when things got shitty. Breeder moos started to tell her it was her time too, and she better do it now than latter, or she may not ever be able to breed. So, she got scared and believed her co-workers, who oopsed their DHs into kids. Well, oops did not work here. Vasectomy (god bless it), once again, stood up to the test and accepted no defeat. It's like a good bullet-proof vest.

I do not know where this relationship will go, but we got a CF man and a fence sitter woman. Who knows, I am not very good at figuring out women. I just know that in this case my friend was always firm on no kids. Whether she knows if he is fixed or not is not that important. It just tested her ability to resist breeder pressures - she failed.

She doesn't sound like a fence sitter to me. He needs to run from her like the very hounds of hell are after him (as mercurior would say).

Holy crap, this story gets worse and worse:

"After talking to my friend and his GF, I have learned something. At first (as always), he was firm on not having kids. She thought she could "change him". Than she thought if it was not meant to be, it was not meant to be, so she did not bother the subject for a long time. Then, couple of her co-workers got knocked up and spit out kids. That is when things got shitty. Breeder moos started to tell her it was her time too, and she better do it now than latter, or she may not ever be able to breed. So, she got scared and believed her co-workers, who oopsed their DHs into kids."

Your friend is a moron, for reasons I'll soon address and because (tell me it ain't so) he's still with this lying slag? I'm sorry, but if I knew that someone deceived me FOR MONTHS, I would recoil in horror and never want to see that person again. What she did is A HUGE DEAL. She made a UNILATERAL decision that what SHE WANTED was more important than what he wanted.

My mind wouldn't let me stay with a person like that. I would think of all the times I was romantic with her, and I thought she was into it FOR ME, when she was really hungry for my sperm and wanted to trick me into fatherhood. Your friend's only rational act was to get a vasectomy and thank Todd he did because his brain isn't working right.

I'm coming to this thread late, but here is my take on it:

1. I've had lots of dates in my life (now married) and my general rule is that for the first couple of months, I wasn't really forthcoming with all the DETAILS of my CF status. Now, I'm a slow dater. I don't believe in the three date rule, where you have three dates with someone, then sleep with them. I'm no prude, but to me the sexual act is very intimate. For a lot of reasons (health is just one) you'd better know someone really well before you boink them.

That doesn't mean I was silent on the issue. When the subject came up, I made it clear that I wasn't interested in children, now or ever. And yes, it sent some of them packing, but good riddance because I would have been miserable anyway.

The key here is to GET A FEEL FOR YOUR PARTNER'S FEELINGS IN A NON-PRESSURE ENVIRONMENT and to EXAMINE HIS/HER REACTION TO YOU. MAKE HIM OR HER SPEAK FIRST so you can see how he/she feels before you show your cards. If he or she starts telling "it isn't that bad" or downplays his or her breederish feelings, run fast. They will re-emerge later, trust me. You don't want a relationship where someone is constantly trying to change a fundamental part of you. You also don't want a relationship where someone is deceiving themself so they can be with you. It will come up later, anyway.

If it progresses to fucking, then you need to have the talk about unplanned pregnancy, birth control, etc.

I suspect Techie's friend went along for the tail and didn't bring it up much. I can understand if it were a casual relationship, but he was with the woman for THREE YEARS and he lived with her? Granted, the woman is a lying slag, but honesty is the basis for every successful relationship and ITA with the observation that these two deserved each other.

2. I am female, but here's what I tell any man who is my friend: Women can be the most deceitful, treacherous creatures on planet Earth. Why? Because women are brought up to believe that men have to be tricked into marriage and the way to do that is through children. I've even known women that profess to be CF, but then get knocked after the wedding because It's What You Do. That social pressure is hard to fight. I'm a right stubborn bitch and nobody is going to push me into something that's not right for me. I've always said that remaining CF for the long haul requires a certain amount of dogged determination, plain and simple. Many females aren't that strong.

3. This is why I preach it loud and proud: Sterilization before marriage. Not PC, if you are 30 and you can't find a doctor to give you a vasetcomy, you just haven't found the right doctor. It's much easier for a man. I had to fight like Hell at AGE 36 to get my tubal ligation, but I've known men who've had them, no questions asked, at age 27.

Despite that fact I was sterilized before marriage, my ex turned into a WannaBreed at age 41. When we were dating, he said (at the beginning) that he wanted the white picket fence, etc. After he found out I was CF, he said he could live without more children. (He had a step daughter that he raised in a previous marriage.) I wish I had listened to his first reaction, because he started cheating with another (married) WannaBreed a few years after we got married. .

Now, there are people who would say that my being sterilized prior to marriage didn't "work" because it didn't keep me from marrying a breeder. I disagree, because it protected me in the most important way: he didn't get to fuck with my birth control or make a unilateral decision about whether I was going to be saddled with a brat for 18 years.

So, Non-PC, here is my unsolicited assvice: Get sterilized if you really don't want kids. Do not do it if you are a fence-sitter. Frankly, I also got one because I knew children weren't for me and I WANTED something that would be really painful to reverse--so if anyone pressured me, or if I fell into a phase of dick madness* some dude, I wouldn't give up my CF decision.

*The male equivalent is pussy madness. If it temporarily got ahold of you, and some woman you fancy yourself to love is putting the full court press on you, the thought of the knife would make you wake the fuck up. You'd have TIME to think about whether you really wanted to ruin your life.

Most bitches just go away and find another man with live sperm. It may be painful in the short term, but you'll thank your lucky stars in the long term.