Just when I thought I had heard all the gross inpig stories possible what with their placenta consumption, Ravaged Cooter Syndrome™ stories, playing with their stringy discharges, stinky twat tales, and Picnic Pussy Problems™, I have discovered they are also proud of their extra stinky fart problems too as they share WAY TMI, across the globe on the World Wide Web. s
Rotten EggsEw...i mean really ew! I am usually able to discreetly and silently pass gas, and it rarely smells. For the last month or so,
my gas has been frequent, loud, and smelly every time. I mean it stinks like rotten eggs, that sulfuric smell. I cant think of anything I have been eating more of lately that would cause it. I am pooping every other day (which is pretty normal for me). I can hardly stand the smell, and it gets really embarrassing in public too.
Am I the only one laying rotten eggs? Lol!
"LOL" is hardly an appropriate response nor is this apparent pride they seem to be taking in being gross. That, and that she'd want to share it on the internet and encourage discussion about it is even MORE gross, as is her recitation of her daily shit habits Blame it on the Old Lady FartOh gosh...a few years back I was in Babies R Us with a prego friend doing her registry and we smelled this nasty
rotten egg fart. She acted disgusted and pointed out an elderly woman near us and said "my nose can't take this nasty old lady" and we moved. On the way home I smelled it again. She started laughing hysterically. It was HER! Only this time there was no poor innocent old lady to blame!
That's not only gross, but RUDE too down
Peanut Butter Butty-Moodon't forget
peanut butter butty- when your gassy you leave skid marks on the tissue- the smell is horrible when you wipe to- it's all just HORRIBLE! lol! -which is why your mama doesnt mention it to you- you'd never have a baby
EeWWWww. Not only does the cow stink up the house, but she leaves, "peanut butter butty" skidmarks AND thinks, "lol!" is an appropriate response to leaving greasy skid marks. I am also left wondering how much time passes between the stinky fart and the wiping of the Peanut Butter Butty(™ pending) .
Passive Aggressive InPig PooterI have gas bad all the time and when I let out a big airy fart it feels sooo good! My husband hates the smell, but its so nice....that deflating feeling and seeing how loud you can make it sound. Plus it makes me giggle to see my husband run away from the blast....usually its the other way around. I dont want to have sex, so it also comes in handy. When he tries to get it on I jut let some juicy ones rip and then I can relax again. One time I farted and left the house to meet him at the office, we came back to the house and when he walked in
he gagged from the lingering smell. I was so proud! Tell me, do you enjoy your farts as much as I do? I really really enjoy this part of pregnancy, I know you probly think I'm weird, but its so fun!
While all of it is absurdly nasty as hell, probably the MOST obnoxious is purposely, with malice and aforethought, stinking up the house before he gets home.Parachute Pig PooterHah! God this thread is already incredible! Eventually, I came back to bed last night, still farting. The last one I ripped was
with such force the sheets rippled up off my butt! The stench woke up dh and he ran out of the room saying, "good lord!" And I'm still farting around this morning. So funny ^.^
If the smell is awful enough to wake someone out of a dead sleep I fail to see how that's funny. Tee hee heeOral Sex and the Inpig FartMy husband and I got frisky one night before bed. I tried my best to be as sexy as possible without looking like an almost eight-months-pregnant beached whale splayed out on the bed. My husband put his face down between my legs to pay some attention to his favorite area. While he was busy down there, I decided it was an opportune time to remove the rest of my undergarments. As I sat up a bit to unclasp my bra,
a great big fart escaped from my rear end. My poor husband's face was right in the line of fire. He just paused for a second and then continued on with what he was doing, as if it never happened.
This is so wrong on so many levels I don't know where to begin.Birthing a TurdFor many days after my baby's birth, I could not have a bowel movement. I had some vaginal tearing and hemorrhoids, so you can imagine how sore I was. My midwife kept giving me laxatives, but to no avail. Finally, many days later, the time came for my first b.m. I was in tears with the pain and
had to call my husband into the bathroom to hold my hand as I pooed. He obliged, stroked my head and told me it was all okay, much like he had done during the birth experience. Having the support of my husband through the MOST undignified time of my entire life was embarrassing, but he still thinks I'm sexy. If that's not love, then I don't know what is!
Beyond gross inpig farting and RE-Volting.s
Preggo "Practice" PoopI have been farting out loud around my DH the last couple weeks and telling him I'm just practicing for when the baby comes.
I also go in the bathroom when he's shaving or showering and take a nice dump. Haha just getting him prepared.
These women are so vulgar and filthy. I can understand having gas, whether inpig makes no difference since we all fart, but to purposely try to work one up, or worse work up or save up a dump and THEN premeditate it and go into the bathroom where the poor man is a captive audience and SHIT while he's in the shower is repulsive.------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- -------
If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!