1135 The Perfect Child Free Restaurant

I rarely edit entries unless asked to do so or unless I observe a typo. I removed the first part of this entry from the rantpage, but here is rant 1135 in its entirety. - BratfreeGirl

First of all, I want to come clean by letting the readers know that I'm not child free. I have two daughters that I have raised to not bother other people in a public setting. In other words, I've taught them basic manners, and punished them when they've broken rules. I've also not been one of those idiot parents that thinks their child is perfect, and can do no wrong. My goal was to create human beings that are worth knowing. My oldest is a high school senior and my youngest is a freshman. While rearing them I was well aware of how annoying other people's children could be. I've been an elementary school teacher for the past 15 years, and am currently looking to change careers. I'm sick of other people's kids, and am especially sick of their parents! I want to commend those of you who realize that parenting isn't for you, and I thank you personally for not bringing another unwanted, undisciplined, unrulely child into this world.

This rant is prompted by a lovely experience that my husband and I had this past Saturday night. We went out to dinner for my birthday, and we didn't take the kids with us. Unfortunately, the couple that was seated at the table next to us did have their little darlings with them. My husband and I were so lucky to get to have "special" interaction with them as they danced and sang around our table. Little Phobe stopped dancing long enough to play a horrid version of Haydon's "Surprise Symphony" on the restaurant's grand piano, while her 40 or 50 something parents looked on with pride. Young Conner stopped dancing around our table long enough to soccer kick my purse that was on the floor against the side of my chair. Did his parents apologize and retrieve my purse? No, I was told, "He think's he's still at soccer practice!" by his proud Papa as my husband picked it up! They restaurant was packed, so there wasn't another table to move to. I asked the couple very nicely if they could please keep their children at their table because my husband and I were trying to enjoy our time out. I was told by daddy dear that they didn't restrict their children, and dealing with other people's children was just a part of going out. I told them that I never allowed my children to run around or bother people in restaurants, and that it certainly didn't interfere with their creative expression. The rest of our meal consisted of dirty looks and me squelching the desire to step on Phoebe and Conners' little hands and feet as they waltzed into my space!

After dinner my husband and I took a drive a discussed the elements of a perfect child free restaurant.
First, it would have to have an inappropriate or scary name like "Fuckby's" or "Someone's Killing Mommy."
Secondly, the menu would include delicious entrees masked with ickly names. For example, veal parmasean would be called, "Dead Baby Cows with Sauce and Cheese." A lobster dinner might be listed as "Sponge Bob's Friend Boiled Alive."
Thirdly, all waitstaff would be hideously ugly and work topless. This would guarantee an 18 or above crowd, and the hideously ugly requirement may keep the rowdy 18-21 crowd out.
I know these thoughts are outrages, and, I'll admit, a tad sicko, but I'm tired of dealing with other people's bad kids when I dine out!

glad to see that you have time away from your kids, unlike most, they bring their brats with them everywhere and ruins a good experience.

why must they bring their badly behaved brats with them all the time.

How nice it was to read your post.....You sound like a really decent nice and caring parent.I know you are a great parent because of the way you have not judged us and even praised us for not bringing unwanted children into the world.

I am sure you have seen the results in your job as a teacher of children that were not wanted or cared for like they deserve to be....

Love your menu suggestions aswell - you have a wicked sense of humour - something alot of us on here can relate to.

Sorry about the bad experience at the resturant - looks like you encoutered a classic family of breeders.Thankyou for showing us that not all people with kids are inconsiderate.Its nice to read something positive about parents for once.There are plenty of breeders out there but I think there is still alot of decent caring parents around such as yourself.

Damn, I wish there could be more parents like you, Sherz. Just goes to show that, just because you have children doesn't mean you like to tolerate the bad behavior of the children of others. I'm sorry you had to deal with breeder crap on your birthday.

Sherz, it was interesting to read about your experience in the restaurant. I know we CF assume that breeders are rude to us because we don't have kids and don't know how "haaard" it is, but it appears these particular breeders were rude even after you identified yourself as a parent. I wonder if they would have reacted the same way - or worse - if you had identified yourself as CF. (Probably worse, I'm guessing.)

If only there was such a place.

I can't imagine the annoyance of planing an evening with your husband away from the kids. Going to the trouble of hiring a sitter and possibly making reservations, etc only to have to deal with someones entitle-minded demon spawn ruining your night out. I hate people like this who think everyone should be charmed by their ill-mannered spawns antics. I don't understand when this became socially acceptable.

It sucks enough when your CF, I can't imagine hiring somebody to watch the cats if I wanted to go out for so much as a nice dinner.

I know enough parents (notice I said parents) to know that teaching your kids manners and keeping them in line takes hard work and the people like you described don't want to be bothered. They just want everyone to ohh and ahh over them because their reproductive organs work. I can imagine how infuriating it is to encounter people like this after you worked so hard to raise good human beings.

You know what I've noticed when it comes to people with kids? The people who are actually doing the most important job in the world (i.e. raising their kids properly) are too busy actually doing it to brag about it.

Sherz, congratulations on a hard job well done! As much as I hate going to places that are plagued by bad parents not disiplining their children, it can also sadden me that those same people make good parents look bad. Keep up the good work for the very good parents out there!!!!!

unlike some people with kids who come visit here, you accept us and our decisions, some just do it to make a point that thier kids are the best.

you seem to seperate your own life, and that of your kids, and thats fantastic. as most breeders dont have a distinct seperation, its kids everywhere all the time.

Hi Sherz! It's nice to actually "witness" a real parent in action. I can imagine the crap you take from brats and their pahrunts while teaching. I have several teacher friends who left the profession because of this exact same bullshit. It's nice to hear you taught your daughters well enough so that the poison from other people's brats doesn't affect them. Hopefully some of your daughter's good upbringing can rub off on them!

"Fuckby's"! Ha! That cracked me up!

I heart Fuckby's. That's awesome.. I would sooo eat there.

And I can't believe how those other people acted. What if there had been something breakable in your purse, like a bottle of perfume or something? Would they have made the brat pay for it out of his allowance? I hope he puts a soccer ball through one of their windows or TVs.. maybe then they won't think it's so cute.