Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 11, 2018 | Registered: 7 years ago Posts: 652 |
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 11, 2018 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 3,725 |
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 11, 2018 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,701 |
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cfuter
I know the Ryan thing is just a political move to get out while the getting is good. But there's a weird trend where everyone is lauding celebs or whoever for quitting jobs to be so-called better fathers/mothers.
Isn't working to put food on the table being a parent? Isn't being a public servant being a role model to your kids? Isn't weekend time family and friend time? Are all parents, while they are young, not supposed to be working at least 40 hours a week, be tired at the end of the day, and just see more of their kids in their free time? Are we all supposed to be not working M-F to make our kids the center of the universe? How did taxi-ing kids back and forth to little league and karate lessons become the focus of human existence? Is the workforce just for people who haven't reproduced? Weird trend being accepted by brain-washing people that kids should be worshiped at an altar.
Now of course, if you have family (or not), being a workaholic isn't healthy. But this mentality in the media ends up trickling down, and then my secretary thinks she should call in a few to several times a month, because her grandchild has a fever and a cough because "family is more important than this place". Um, how many adults are gonna take off of work for one grandchild? Or, she calls in because her adult child has a doctor's appointment. Can't she just tell you what happened after the appointment? She's not dying and even if she was, she's not gonna keel over at the appointment. Life goes on and you discuss things, not have to be part of every moment for every single fam member. I can't take off of work if my roof's leaking. I have to put a bucket underneath it and wait til the weekend to fix it.
I just think this is a weird trend. Sure, people are more important than some company you work for when push comes to shove. But truly, making a living is important so your family can eat and have a house to be warm in. Pretending that is not true is not helping anyone. It creates friction where there shouldn't be any. You are not entitled to a paycheck, you WORK for it.
Or, is is just me?
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 11, 2018 | Registered: 7 years ago Posts: 652 |
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Peace
Don't feel too sorry for him just yet. He'll probably eventually land in a cushy university job teaching political science, where he'll never have to answer to the citizens for his shitty politics.
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 12, 2018 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,204 |
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But this mentality in the media ends up trickling down, and then my secretary thinks she should call in a few to several times a month, because her grandchild has a fever and a cough because "family is more important than this place". Um, how many adults are gonna take off of work for one grandchild? Or, she calls in because her adult child has a doctor's appointment. Can't she just tell you what happened after the appointment? She's not dying and even if she was, she's not gonna keel over at the appointment. Life goes on and you discuss things, not have to be part of every moment for every single fam member.
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 12, 2018 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,701 |
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cfuter
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Peace
Don't feel too sorry for him just yet. He'll probably eventually land in a cushy university job teaching political science, where he'll never have to answer to the citizens for his shitty politics.
But if he works again, he's back to being a "weekend dad". What will he and the kids do? Doncha know in 2018 your whole life is suppose to sound around your children?
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 13, 2018 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 5,646 |
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 13, 2018 | Registered: 7 years ago Posts: 652 |
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 13, 2018 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 3,725 |
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bell_flower
The inefficiency of modern parenthood astounds me.
In my day to day life I have so many questions such as:
Why does it take an entire family to go to the store? Or the doctor's office? Why can't one person stay home with the kid?
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 14, 2018 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 12,440 |
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freya
The entire family has to go to the grocery store so they can stand around with blank looks on their faces and block the entire aisle.
The doctor's office is same principle but the entire family can take up all the seats in the waiting room and the brats can whine about being bored.
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 14, 2018 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 1,842 |
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 14, 2018 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 1,842 |
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yurble
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freya
The entire family has to go to the grocery store so they can stand around with blank looks on their faces and block the entire aisle.
The doctor's office is same principle but the entire family can take up all the seats in the waiting room and the brats can whine about being bored.
There's one doctor's office men seem to get out of visiting, but kids still must be brought: gynecology. And where maybe one or two people in a GP's waiting room will have kids, it seems like every woman in a gynecologist's waiting room must have a handful of them. Do they think a demonstration of reproduction is a substitute for a pap smear or something? Do they expect gold medals? I'm pretty sure none of those children were the result of asexual reproduction, and given the sheer number of women who bring them they can't all be single mawms, so why the fuck can't someone else watch them?
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 14, 2018 | Registered: 7 years ago Posts: 652 |
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 14, 2018 | Registered: 7 years ago Posts: 652 |
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 14, 2018 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 12,440 |
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mr. neptune
One reason I am so glad to be a man is the stories my sisters tell me about "old gynes" and their offices with the preggos, crowded waiting rooms, having to wait around so long and the baby pictures on every vertical surface. Are planned parenthood offices like that?
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 14, 2018 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 12,440 |
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cfuter
While I'm glad men are more involved, but as a fellow patient, is something I was used to doing in a quiet atmosphere, w/o all the auxiliary people around. Ya think the moo would let dud watch the sprogs, so she could have a quiet hour to herself while going to the doctor. They make their own lives harried.
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 14, 2018 | Registered: 7 years ago Posts: 652 |
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yurble
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cfuter
While I'm glad men are more involved, but as a fellow patient, is something I was used to doing in a quiet atmosphere, w/o all the auxiliary people around. Ya think the moo would let dud watch the sprogs, so she could have a quiet hour to herself while going to the doctor. They make their own lives harried.
Given how many women have anxiety about checkups and use this as a reason to not get them, the doctors should consider reserving one day a week for "quiet" appointments: no kids, maximum one other adult (friend, partner, whatever) for moral support if required. (I don't need support for my regular checkups, but I did want my partner there when I was going for sterilization, and I know some people are more anxious than I am.) If they can have awtizm movie nights, surely they could manage one day a week of quiet gyne days?
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 15, 2018 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 12,440 |
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cfuter
I was thinking the same thing about only scheduling non preggos on certain days. I'll keep going here til my doctor retires. Once he does, Im finding a gyne that doesnt do obstetrics. I'll be much happier.
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 15, 2018 | Registered: 7 years ago Posts: 652 |
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 15, 2018 | Registered: 11 years ago Posts: 3,578 |
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freya
I completely agree with you and most parents will be incredibly lucky to have one parent at home, let alone two. The parents who go on and on about their sacrifices and humble brag about staying at home need to shut up. Met a man who was very very fortunate to be able to make an incredible living working just a few hours a week (10-12 at most) by the time he had kids. He only had to keep his very successful product relevant with updates here and there. He was able to devote pretty much all his time to his kids. He home schooled them, tons of field trips and learning, etc. and went out of his way to be a dream parent. They were indulged in all activities they wanted to experience. His daughter resents that she didn't attend public school. Both of his kids now require him to pick them up from college.
No matter what parents do and the effort exerted the overwhelming majority of kids are going to find something to complain about.
All human beings deserve to be brought up without abuse or neglect and with proper medical and nutrition. If parents can afford it, an activity or two would be nice. And they are on the spot to raise their kids to be proper citizens and good functional people. Other than that I don't think they are further obligated. College, lots of extracurricular activities, camp, iPhones, etc. are optional.
Re: Lauding people for not wanting to be just a "weekend dad" April 15, 2018 | Registered: 7 years ago Posts: 652 |