CF person gets crap from mommies about how they "don't know what tired is" April 15, 2021 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 9,976 |
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This is probably really stupid. I really don’t think I’m the AH here but my friends are split...unsurprisingly pretty evenly along lines of who has kids and who doesn’t.
Basically I (34f) have a really demanding job. I work long hours, never really get to turn off, and have a crap contract which means unemployment is always looming. Sometimes I make it to the end of the week and I can barely keep my eyes open. There are weeks during busy periods where I barely get to see my partner, let alone my friends. Long story short, sometimes I’m just really, really tired.
Recently I was hanging out with some friends and mentioned that I was struggling a bit at the moment because it’s a particularly busy time at work. I said I was excited for a day off and a lie in because I was bone tired. About 3 of my friends (all mothers of kids under 6) laughed and said I didn’t ‘understand the meaning of tired’ because I don’t have children. One of them said a week in my life would be like a holiday for them and that I shouldn’t complain because childless people have it so easy. They just went on and on, telling me how hard it is to have kids and that when I ‘grow up’ and have a family I’ll realise how stupid I sound.
So, I got kinda pissed. I told them they didn’t have a monopoly on being tired and that they have no idea what my life is like. I told them if it’s so damn hard to have kids maybe they shouldn’t have kept having them. I also told them it was shitty to talk down to people who have made different choices to them. I understood being tired just fine thanks very much, and that having kids is not something that means you deserve a frigging medal.
It was awkward, people left. One of the mothers messaged me later to say I was unfair and that one day I’d understand and feel bad and that I should apologise. She said she felt I was being unsympathetic to people with kids by ‘playing down their experiences’. I told her she was being patronising as hell and to leave me to sleep. All the parents in our group are now texting me telling me I’m in the wrong, but all the childless ones are saying I’m NTA. Am I the asshole for saying I understand what real tiredness feels like even though I don’t have kids?
TLDR: friends with kids think only they have the right to say they know what it feels like to be really tired. I think they’re full of shit because other stuff is also tiring..
Re: CF person gets crap from mommies about how they "don't know what tired is" April 15, 2021 | Registered: 10 years ago Posts: 2,364 |
Re: CF person gets crap from mommies about how they "don't know what tired is" April 15, 2021 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 5,635 |
Re: CF person gets crap from mommies about how they "don't know what tired is" April 15, 2021 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,199 |
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I know I've spoken of it here before, but when I was in the full throes of untreated hypothyroidism, I was exhausted and suffered insomnia at the same time. I was so miserable from tiredness and an inability to sleep that I was on the verge of legitimately going crazy.
Re: CF person gets crap from mommies about how they "don't know what tired is" April 15, 2021 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 9,976 |
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kittehpeoples
This is such a common thing, for these bitches to denigrate others for daring to say they're tired...wtf do they gain by it, anyway?
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bell_flower
One of my DH's friends, whom I would describe as a big, tough, athletic guy, went from doctor to doctor until he got a diagnosis of underperforming thyroid. During that time when he didn't have a diagnosis and was going downhill, he increased his life insurance and truly thought he was going to die. I've also had thyroid issues and some other painful medical conditions and I know that bone tired feeling where sleep is not restorative.
Re: CF person gets crap from mommies about how they "don't know what tired is" April 18, 2021 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 3,712 |
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Cambion
From r/AmItheAsshole:
https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/j2u0fm/aita_for_saying_people_without_kids_can_also_get/
Why do Moos have to turn every fucking thing into a pissing contest?
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About 3 of my friends (all mothers of kids under 6) laughed and said I didn’t ‘understand the meaning of tired’ because I don’t have children. One of them said a week in my life would be like a holiday for them and that I shouldn’t complain because childless people have it so easy. They just went on and on, telling me how hard it is to have kids and that when I ‘grow up’ and have a family I’ll realise how stupid I sound.
So, I got kinda pissed.
Re: CF person gets crap from mommies about how they "don't know what tired is" April 19, 2021 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 5,635 |