Breeder Birther Entitlment. Kiss moo's feet and worship her.

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navi8orgirl
larious
OK so I was not the only one who saw "Come over and give my husband...." as something that can go horribly awry.

and then leave. Of course.

That reminded me of a few incidents in my distant past regarding "hubby" and his "needs". The first one was this couple who lived next door to me when I was about 22. They had seemed pretty happy together and then of course the baybee bump surfaced within months of the wedding vows. While she was in the hospital and due home that very day, I took a casserole over there and her husband answered the door with a beer in his hand. He asked me to put it in their fridge because he was on the phone with Her Highness. I had lived next to them for about a year and had been to their home with my husband and vice versa and had always thought that he was a decent guy. However, the INPIG wife who had just shat combined with his drinking must have been his breaking point. That guy did everything but outright ask me to fuck him after he had wailed about NOT wanting to have a kid! I promptly left and while I declined any further invitations from them, occasionally the moo would stop by and drone on and and on about what a WONDERFUL father that he was and how estatically happy that they had been since she had shat the loaf.

I SO wanted to tell her what he had said and how he had come onto me WHILE she was in the hospital, but thought better of it. Another time the husband of a co-worker came on to me at a party not a month after SHE had shat a loaf. He actually cornered me in the kitchen and basically asked me to meet him at the vacant pool house behind their house! This one too supposedly was SO fucking happy about having become a duddy, but who clearly was not. The last one that I recall was a male co-worker who asked me out REPEATEDLY while his live in girl friend was inpig.I was acquainted with all three women in these incidents and they ALL honestly believed that their man was happy about their inpigness and just luuuved them even more for having spawned their baybeees. It does no good to tell these women anything because the men will deny it and the women will typically blame the messenger.

There have been other times that aren't as memorable or blatant and I have also heard many other women tell similar stories about horny toad duddys and duds to be. So, I suppose that like with just about everything else, these inpig moomares bury their heads in the sand when it concerns their husbands and their wishes and needs.

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If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!

Heaven help the friend who makes this moo the wrong type of food, or dares to want to spend a few minutes talking to her while doing all the household chores.

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"Not every ejaculation deserves a name" - George Carlin

What Peace and Diva said. It's not as if she didn't have time to prepare for the event and she's done it before because she has multiple kyds. (And if it's that bad, she shouldn't be having more kyds.)

The list is ridiculous. She can freeze food if Dud is too big of a moron or too lazy to cook a basic meal. (And see point #1---she shouldn't be having a baybee with someone incompetent.) She can make arrangements for her kids. She should be telling relatives if she wants them to visit or not. If her house is a pigsty, she can put her kyds (gasp!) or husband to work or set money aside for some housekeeping services for that time.

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Peace
I forgot to add in my previous post, we should all comment on this lady's blog. It needs more "ideas" from a CF point of view

Gotta disagree with that. If you are going to make a general, reasoned comment, (and Moo's article is a target rich environment) that's one thing. But going over there and declaring your CF status and trolling the article makes you no better than Breeders who come over here to bingo us. I like this site because we can discuss our views HERE, but I don't want to start a flame war.

Lurking Breeders, remember a truly CF person might not have posted the baiting comment--it might have been one of you who was trying to make CFers look bad.

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"JoAnne is having a hard time since the baybee was born and "we" are getting together and taking meals over every night for a few weeks. Could you make up one of your wonderful "care packages" or maybe drop off a casserole on Monday night?" Since I had about 6 months to re-examine my prior generosity and think up a response for the ASSHOLES who would sooner let me rot than look at me, I simply replied, "No, I can't. I have too much on my OWN plate right now,

A couple of years ago in my office, a guy's wife cranked out HER THIRD KYD. Everyone was tripping all over himself/herself to have a shower, bake food and all that crap. Thankfully, the guy was pretty classy and put a stop to it. He was like...hey it's our third kid. We have everything we need and don't want a baybee shower.

Meantime, a dude in his 50's had his dad die after a long illness. His father was a WWII hero. People could barely be arsed to sign a sympathy card. I did something on my own and sent them a gift card from a local grocery store. He really appreciated the gesture because his wife was taking care of his dad and she was worn out. They were able to have dinner on me one night.

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Lurking Breeders, remember a truly CF person might not have posted the baiting comment--it might have been one of you who was trying to make CFers look bad.

It does seem like a odd thing for one of us to do.

It's been deleted now, as has some other stuff (I had a pending comment :lips )

I guess her blog, her rules, at least she didn't go batshit when she figured out where we were coming from.

Just so you guys know, if Doula Gloria reads the word "entitlement" one more time, she'll gag. And if we read one more of your new mom request lists, we'll choke! No placenta for you!

"Okay, folks! I’ve let a lot of these comments go because, hey, everyone has an opinion. But, as someone said above, the TROLLS have invaded my space. I’m stopping all the anonymous comments from the “I don’t want to have kids website”. You’re all starting to sound the same and if I read “entitlement” one more time, I’ll gag. No more, you’ve said your piece, I get it."

All entitlemoos like these can exect from me is a good hard kick in the ass.

11. Come over quietly and clean my newborn's shit and piss out of the kitchen sink and bathtub. Then do the dishes and draw me a hot bath.

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bell_flower
But going over there and declaring your CF status and trolling the article makes you no better than Breeders who come over here to bingo us.

Indeed. Leaving a calling card is nothing short of trollery. It's one thing to express our opinions, or, at least as often, snark about for shits & giggles. But there's no need to be hurtful. And face it, inviting moms to come here and view our screed would seem to be nothing short of an effort to do just that.

Please take note: there has been a record number of guests to this site today, 11/12/10.

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luckystar

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bell_flower
But going over there and declaring your CF status and trolling the article makes you no better than Breeders who come over here to bingo us.

Indeed. Leaving a calling card is nothing short of trollery. It's one thing to express our opinions, or, at least as often, snark about for shits & giggles. But there's no need to be hurtful. And face it, inviting moms to come here and view our screed would seem to be nothing short of an effort to do just that.

Please take note: there has been a record number of guests to this site today, 11/12/10.

Yeah, I really wish people wouldn't do that. There's no point. We won't change their minds and they certainly won't change ours, so there is no need to trade barbs or try to discuss anything. All it does is lead people that we don't want to our board.

I agree. I don't even want to see their point of view, so why try to convince them with ours?



This topic has been viewed, 1,314 times today, from my last viewing/comment.

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lab mom

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WaterLily
I agree. I don't even want to see their point of view, so why try to convince them with ours?



This topic has been viewed, 1,314 times today, from my last viewing/comment.

On a positive note, WL, you have started one of the most unintentionally hilarious posts I've read in awhile. It was truly priceless.

Logic doesn't work for these people anyway. If it did, they'd realize that there are too many people on the planet and their children are going to suffer horribly once we run out of fossil fuels and can no longer grow enough food to feed everyone. I just wish I had an evacuation plan, because I'd enjoy watching breeders run around like headless chickens as the consequences of their collective stupidity caught up with them. s

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The Grinch

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WaterLily
I agree. I don't even want to see their point of view, so why try to convince them with ours?



This topic has been viewed, 1,314 times today, from my last viewing/comment.

On a positive note, WL, you have started one of the most unintentionally hilarious posts I've read in awhile. It was truly priceless.

You're welcome.

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yurble
Logic doesn't work for these people anyway. If it did, they'd realize that there are too many people on the planet and their children are going to suffer horribly once we run out of fossil fuels and can no longer grow enough food to feed everyone. I just wish I had an evacuation plan, because I'd enjoy watching breeders run around like headless chickens as the consequences of their collective stupidity caught up with them. s

Same here.

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lab mom

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bell_flower
What Peace and Diva said. It's not as if she didn't have time to prepare for the event and she's done it before because she has multiple kyds. (And if it's that bad, she shouldn't be having more kyds.)

The list is ridiculous. She can freeze food if Dud is too big of a moron or too lazy to cook a basic meal. (And see point #1---she shouldn't be having a baybee with someone incompetent.) She can make arrangements for her kids. She should be telling relatives if she wants them to visit or not. If her house is a pigsty, she can put her kyds (gasp!) or husband to work or set money aside for some housekeeping services for that time.

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Peace
I forgot to add in my previous post, we should all comment on this lady's blog. It needs more "ideas" from a CF point of view

Gotta disagree with that. If you are going to make a general, reasoned comment, (and Moo's article is a target rich environment) that's one thing. But going over there and declaring your CF status and trolling the article makes you no better than Breeders who come over here to bingo us. I like this site because we can discuss our views HERE, but I don't want to start a flame war.

Lurking Breeders, remember a truly CF person might not have posted the baiting comment--it might have been one of you who was trying to make CFers look bad.

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"JoAnne is having a hard time since the baybee was born and "we" are getting together and taking meals over every night for a few weeks. Could you make up one of your wonderful "care packages" or maybe drop off a casserole on Monday night?" Since I had about 6 months to re-examine my prior generosity and think up a response for the ASSHOLES who would sooner let me rot than look at me, I simply replied, "No, I can't. I have too much on my OWN plate right now,

A couple of years ago in my office, a guy's wife cranked out HER THIRD KYD. Everyone was tripping all over himself/herself to have a shower, bake food and all that crap. Thankfully, the guy was pretty classy and put a stop to it. He was like...hey it's our third kid. We have everything we need and don't want a baybee shower.

Meantime, a dude in his 50's had his dad die after a long illness. His father was a WWII hero. People could barely be arsed to sign a sympathy card. I did something on my own and sent them a gift card from a local grocery store. He really appreciated the gesture because his wife was taking care of his dad and she was worn out. They were able to have dinner on me one night.

Agree with your whole post, both about not going over there to troll, let them have their playground, we have ours. And about how not just new parents need support.

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luckystar
11. Come over quietly and clean my newborn's shit and piss out of the kitchen sink and bathtub. Then do the dishes and draw me a hot bath.

12. In addition to the garbage can with tight-fitting lid, buy me some tupperware bowls with tight-fitting lids so I can dangle the spawn over them at church, at the movies, on a plane, at the holiday dinner table, in the living room during the football game and anywhere else I please while practicing 'E.C.'

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Melanie

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luckystar
11. Come over quietly and clean my newborn's shit and piss out of the kitchen sink and bathtub. Then do the dishes and draw me a hot bath.

12. In addition to the garbage can with tight-fitting lid, buy me some tupperware bowls with tight-fitting lids so I can dangle the spawn over them at church, at the movies, on a plane, at the holiday dinner table, in the living room during the football game and anywhere else I please while practicing 'E.C.'

13. If you see floaters in the punch bowl at the Holiday Party, fish them out with your bare hands, eat them, and then look the other way. Then serve guests with punch and cookies. Bring me a cup and a plateful because I've no problem drinking my daughter's piss and eating her shit. Then leave the holiday party -- there's only one use for you.

I'm coming in late on this one (it's been a shit week) but I finally had a chance to have a look at the link in the OP. The list is, of course, ri-fucking-diculous, which you've all covered. I skimmed the comments and one of them made me shout at the monitor louder than the others. It was this one:

LuckyDoula says:
November 9, 2010 at 1:02 am
I had a similar experience after the birth of my daughter (feeling abandoned). It’s very lonely and exhausting. It really does take a village, but as a society now we focus on the success of the individual, not the community. Our saving grace was our Doula, and it inspired me to become one as well, and I do those things for the moms that I wish someone had done for me.

I learned the phrase "it takes a village" 20 years ago in one of my uni courses. We were taught it meant that adults beyond the child's family help to keep kids in line by reinforcing the boundaries that should be set up by the family. The example we were provided with was a story from the professor's own experiences - one in which on a family trip to Poland she was told off by one of the locals for playing in a fountain. The original intent of the idiom, to my mind, grants permission to the rest of the grown-up world to speak up and correct a child's behaviour when necessary.

Breeders have completely bastardised the original intent of the phrase. Gone is the idea that it's ok for me to speak up when I see a kid running around out of control. Now it means I'm supposed to bend over backwards and worship at the feet of the almighty mummy. And forget about the original intent; if we dared to say anything corrective to a kid we'd be on the business end of a serious hissy fit.

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TheLittleSmoke
(on "it takes a village")
The original intent of the idiom, to my mind, grants permission to the rest of the grown-up world to speak up and correct a child's behavior when necessary.

Further: the "village" had a vested interest in the kid. Those children would be the ones who would herd the cattle or goats; protect the flock for the welfare of the rest of the people. They would ensure that the older folks - who were past the ability to contribute but had been in the same positions when they were young - were supplied with sustenance. Kind of the "circle of life" hakuna matata stuff that is translated these days to "who will wipe your ass when you get old" bingo. Only thing is, the little varmints are supposed to be treated, these days, like they can do no wrong and should be worshiped for their mere existence, rather than for their future responsibilities - which will take discipline for them to be adequately trained to take up.

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TheLittleSmoke
I'm coming in late on this one (it's been a shit week) but I finally had a chance to have a look at the link in the OP. The list is, of course, ri-fucking-diculous, which you've all covered. I skimmed the comments and one of them made me shout at the monitor louder than the others. It was this one:

LuckyDoula says:
November 9, 2010 at 1:02 am
I had a similar experience after the birth of my daughter (feeling abandoned). It’s very lonely and exhausting. It really does take a village, but as a society now we focus on the success of the individual, not the community. Our saving grace was our Doula, and it inspired me to become one as well, and I do those things for the moms that I wish someone had done for me.

I learned the phrase "it takes a village" 20 years ago in one of my uni courses. We were taught it meant that adults beyond the child's family help to keep kids in line by reinforcing the boundaries that should be set up by the family. The example we were provided with was a story from the professor's own experiences - one in which on a family trip to Poland she was told off by one of the locals for playing in a fountain. The original intent of the idiom, to my mind, grants permission to the rest of the grown-up world to speak up and correct a child's behaviour when necessary.

Breeders have completely bastardised the original intent of the phrase. Gone is the idea that it's ok for me to speak up when I see a kid running around out of control. Now it means I'm supposed to bend over backwards and worship at the feet of the almighty mummy. And forget about the original intent; if we dared to say anything corrective to a kid we'd be on the business end of a serious hissy fit.

Truer words never were spoken.

7. Come over in your work clothes and vacuum and dust my house and then leave quietly. It’s tiring for me to chat and have tea with visitors but it will renew my soul to get some rest knowing I will wake up to clean, organized space.

you obviously have not seen my "lack of" housekeeping skills, have you? :partay

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herbalgeek

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gymrat
If you could change the title to "After Major Surgery, What You Can Suggest to Friends Who Offer To Help" it would be a good list! I wouldn't mind doing anything on that list for someone who just went through a major medical procedure, or even a minor one, for that matter.

Yeah, it would be a good list for someone who just went through surgery/is going through chemo/just got fucked up in a car accident, but this "peel me a grape" attitude from someone who chose to be in her situation just puts me right off.

Oh, Good Lord, this commenter right here just takes the cake:

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First time parents have NO CLUE these days what having a baby entails. They have romanticized ideas about what it will be like, but only from television sitcoms (where they rarely show the immediate postpartum at home taking care of everything) the only show I saw that ever talked about that, as a sitcom, was Dharma and Greg. After Dharma’s mom attended a homebirth of a baby that Dharma and Greg were going to adopt, did adopt, they canceled the show.

I hate to break it to this woman, but anyone who tries to learn life skills from a sitcom is a fucking idiot.

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So, throughout history, when moms got the real story from other moms, were around birth as it was a normal part of community living, etc that was wrong? Only now is right because we have run away from community? We have become isolated from other parents in general all over the world (well, industrialized countries) that what used to be common knowledge and activity is now debunked and found to be a controversial topic!! “you are on your own. good luck and c ya” really?

The irony must be totally lost on this woman, seeing as she is posting this on the fucking internet! You mean to tell me, what with all the moo blogs and boards out there, that there is no possible way that these women can find information on what to expect after the loaf comes? Christ, they can manage to find shit online about how to get a preggo belly cast or painting, or pee-stick necklaces, or push presents and all that other horseshit, but not what they really need? FFS, woman, use your internet connection for more than cultivating fake strawberries on Farmville, and you just may learn something.

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birth and parenting life as we know it has been 100+ years in the making. Its a giant experiment. and its an epic fail. We NEED each other to support our families and ultimately our society. Crime is an epidemic, mental disorders, physiologic diseases are all totally bothersome to say the least.

If you have a chance to prevent that on any level why wouldn’t you? And its so easy to bring a family a bit of groceries, take their older children with you shopping, for if they are old enough they can tell you mom’s favorite food, what she has been wanting to snack on in her last days of pregnancy, and it gives an hour that mom can rest and feed the baby without the kids being needy or distracting.

Are you fucking shitting me? Societal problems such as crime and physical/mental disorders, nonono! Surely things like economic disparity and other things don't come into play here; it's all because we didn't bring moomie her fucking organic salad. The mind boggles.

i like the idea that mental disorders and physiological diseases are "totally bothersome". i'm not a parent and i find that totally offensive and ignorant. getting behind a person with 25 items and half don't scan is "bothersome". the copier at work fucking shit up is "bothersome". mental disorders and physiological disease in one's child is DEVASTATING. to even claim that somehow it's the fault of someone not tucking her into bed with her child, folding her apparently endless piles of laundry or feed her an organic salad is a testament to her self centeredness.

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TheLittleSmoke
Breeders have completely bastardised the original intent of the phrase. Gone is the idea that it's ok for me to speak up when I see a kid running around out of control. Now it means I'm supposed to bend over backwards and worship at the feet of the almighty mummy. And forget about the original intent; if we dared to say anything corrective to a kid we'd be on the business end of a serious hissy fit.

Don't forget that they also expect "the village" to heavily subsidize their lifestyle choice. Too many kids now are just dumber than a box of rocks, and we're getting less and less for our money as time goes on. Children are our fyooture! And we are fucked. :smn

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Shauna's like a gluten-free Jim Jones for dumb, lifeless middle-aged women. I swear, this bitch could set fire to a orphanage and they would applaud her for bringing them light. ~ Miss Hannigan

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zatoth
7. Come over in your work clothes and vacuum and dust my house and then leave quietly. It’s tiring for me to chat and have tea with visitors but it will renew my soul to get some rest knowing I will wake up to clean, organized space.

you obviously have not seen my "lack of" housekeeping skills, have you? :partay

Or mine. Eh, my house could use a little cleaning. Why would any breeder trust me to clean theirs?

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lab mom

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WaterLily
Or mine. Eh, my house could use a little cleaning. Why would any breeder trust me to clean theirs?

Heh. Heaven help the person who asks that I clean and organize their house. I have always been a bit OCD about organization and cleaning. The new moo would most likely appreciate the order I bring to her house, but heaven forfend I pay a later visit and find my task gone awry.

"I CLEANED AND ORGANIZED - I EXPECT IT TO REMAIN IN THE SAME STATE I LEFT IT!WHY ASK ME TO COME IN AND HELP OUT IF YOU JUST GO AND TEAR IT ALL UP! THAT'S THE LAST TIME I EVER DO ANYTHING FOR YOU!!!"

Nope, I would not be the kind of person a moo should ask for household help

her "demands of her friends" sounds more like elizabet bathory's commands to her young maidservants...