Sooo, do you want the 1st, 2nd or 3rd shift schedule for helping me out with the baby :wtf

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Tiramisu
Hi, All, I'm a regular poster over on the board where this thread originated. Some of the latest is that the SIL texted the OP and told her that the schedule was in the mail. When it arrived, OP (who is a full time nurse working 12 hour shifts, a wife and mother of 3 kids) had been "scheduled" by her SIL for 14, yes 14 consecutive 12 hour shifts. OP texted, "No," to her. OP's FIL (who is pretty awesome) showed up for lunch and saw the schedule on the dining table, he promptly called his daughter and read her the riot act, then he read his wife the riot act. Much backpedaling ensued. Things have been pretty quiet so far since his calls.

How did you find out about this thread we're having here?

are you a moderator over there who has access to incoming link referrals?

or are we showing up at the top of a google search as this site often does?

can't wait to read more of the original thread when i get home and get near some popcorn.

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"I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell"

:eatu

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Tiramisu
Hi, All, I'm a regular poster over on the board where this thread originated. Some of the latest is that the SIL texted the OP and told her that the schedule was in the mail. When it arrived, OP (who is a full time nurse working 12 hour shifts, a wife and mother of 3 kids) had been "scheduled" by her SIL for 14, yes 14 consecutive 12 hour shifts. OP texted, "No," to her. OP's FIL (who is pretty awesome) showed up for lunch and saw the schedule on the dining table, he promptly called his daughter and read her the riot act, then he read his wife the riot act. Much backpedaling ensued. Things have been pretty quiet so far since his calls.

The only person who is allowed to schedule me is my boss---and that's only because I'm getting a paycheck.

I think the best option here is to be FIRM. And if the person in question still wants to be polite about it, she can be. But if she gives in, I think she should pretty much expect to be "scheduled" by this person for the rest of her life.

I can't help but think the reasons for the 14 shifts is because no one else is willing to help her crazy ass either!

Another from the original board where it's located: y'all showed up on a google search [as did several other sites, apparently]. I will say, I'm so glad there are so many other wonderful sane people in the world!


Wow, was going to throw in a smiley, y'all have some pretty freaking awesome emoticons!

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Eldergal
Another from the original board where it's located: y'all showed up on a google search [as did several other sites, apparently]. I will say, I'm so glad there are so many other wonderful sane people in the world!


Wow, was going to throw in a smiley, y'all have some pretty freaking awesome emoticons!

Elder,

Welcome aboard.

I think that the larger picture here is that the Mother is trying inject a new "normal" onto her extended family. If we rewind the clock 50 years, a Stay At Home Mom (SAHM) would be expected to take care of her kids. Period. And that's her job, exclusively. She can also cook and clean while she's home.

But in "the new normal" world of this person, it's expected that others are willing and eager to offer 24 hour support to her.

It's time that people started emphatically saying "NO" to these takers. Because that's all they do--take, take, take. I've seen them. I've known some of them. They really don't give a shit about me and they don't care about you either. It's time to stop giving them our time, our energy, and our money. If having kids is such a wonderful and joyous experience, why do they need our help anyway?

54

You know, it's easy to be shocked at the sister-in-law's demands and then find them hilarious, but a serious issue rears its head.

From the epic thread, here's a letter someone suggested that OP send:

"Dear SIL

"Thank you for sending me your schedule, while reading it I began to become quite concerned for you. Perhaps you should consider adoption? It is obvious that you are in no way able to care for this baby as the majority of parents do.

"Here is a list of adoption agencies in your area.


"Love,
The Normal One In The Family"

With SIL's irrational demands, this might not be a joking issue. Is she actually crazy? psychopathic? on drugs? Might her existing child and new baby be in some sort of danger?

And her husband has health issues that cause seizures. He cannot drive, and the mother won't be able to for a while after the birth either. Is the husband's problem hereditary? Why have more children if it is? Oh wait, these are breeders, never mind... In this era neither parent being able to drive for medical reasons is not a winning strategy, to say the least.

But seriously, I see enough here to get professionals involved for a real assessment of this couple's fitness as parents, and perhaps Child Protective Services needs to be notified. The SIL is nuttier than a fruitcake, and she just might need to be tested for drug use. Things just don't bode well here, and I say all this in complete seriousness.

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StudioFiftyFour
It's time that people started emphatically saying "NO" to these takers. Because that's all they do--take, take, take. I've seen them. I've known some of them. They really don't give a shit about me and they don't care about you either. It's time to stop giving them our time, our energy, and our money. If having kids is such a wonderful and joyous experience, why do they need our help anyway?

54

:yr

The condensed version of WNM3's saga has been updated back on page 2.

To the Invisapeep's posters - some of us have been around childfree boards for a couple of decades now. Entitlement is probably the #1 objectionable topic; your OP's in-laws are the most egregious example that any of us have probably seen, hence the epic attention.

I did a fast scroll through most of the posts and saw where the thread is spreading. I didn't see any mention that it has been discussed on the Mother-in-Law Stories Board. Because of the stringent rules on that forum, the x-posting had to be very circumspect. However, as a forum that centers around dealing with family dysfunction, the way that WNM3, her husband, and her FIL have dealt with the issue is getting 99% accolades. Counting those who post and those who lurk, you can be sure that she is being applauded by 100s of people. Hopefully some will follow her lead of detachment, non-inflammatory responses, and knowing when to pass the responsibility for resolution to others.

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Eldergal


Wow, was going to throw in a smiley, y'all have some pretty freaking awesome emoticons!

Heh heh heh. Ordinarily, I wouldn't presume to speak for everyone, but I think it's safe to say that this is our collective favorite:

ani

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"I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell"

:eatu

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SlumSlut

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Eldergal


Wow, was going to throw in a smiley, y'all have some pretty freaking awesome emoticons!

Heh heh heh. Ordinarily, I wouldn't presume to speak for everyone, but I think it's safe to say that this is our collective favorite:

ani

I like this one: because it's "me" 90% of the time in real life.

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If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!

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kidlesskim

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SlumSlut

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Eldergal


Wow, was going to throw in a smiley, y'all have some pretty freaking awesome emoticons!

Heh heh heh. Ordinarily, I wouldn't presume to speak for everyone, but I think it's safe to say that this is our collective favorite:

ani

I like this one: because it's "me" 90% of the time in real life.

that is a good one to use, but the drewani is one that we made ourselves. i picked out the images and i forget who - either Hannigan or RNB - made it an animated gif. If you see the drewani icon anywhere else, it was swiped from here.

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"I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell"

:eatu

LOL I'm reading the part of the original thread where they're googling it for other sites that posted it.

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page 20
"I've seen this thread referenced and linked on at least 3 different boards. 1 on babycenter.com, 1 on grandparents.com and one other I can't recall at the moment. the third is the brat free board. and they all think that SIL has lost her ever-lovin' mind."

Meta-hilarious!

I sort of have a feeling we'll be getting a tidal-wave of new registered (and non-registered) users here.

I guarantee some of you won't like this place! :1wv

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"I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell"

:eatu

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SlumSlut
LOL I'm reading the part of the original thread where they're googling it for other sites that posted it.

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page 20
"I've seen this thread referenced and linked on at least 3 different boards. 1 on babycenter.com, 1 on grandparents.com and one other I can't recall at the moment. the third is the brat free board. and they all think that SIL has lost her ever-lovin' mind."

Meta-hilarious!

I sort of have a feeling we'll be getting a tidal-wave of new registered (and non-registered) users here.

I guarantee some of you won't like this place! :1wv

Perhaps we should form a "welcome wagon" with several members making a special effort to make unregistered users, especially breeders, fence sitters, and breeder sympathizers, feel welcomed so as not to offend or hurt anyone's feelings. I nominate TeleCat as the welcome committee leader.wink

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If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!

"Dori" on the OP forum wants to know how this is spreading like a meme.

I can tell you Dori, that we have members here who like to look for interesting things on other forums, blogs, social-networking sites, and in the news. We (bratfree.com) believe that it is appropriate to snark on things in our own space. We are against going on other sites and pushing an "agenda".

Having said that, it is entirely possible that one or more of our members is registered and participates on your forums. I'm just trying to make it clear that the views expressed by our individual members (both elsewhere and on here) in no way reflect any sort of policy or philosophy endorsed by the owner(s) of bratfree.com.

Also, we thank you in advance for reading our rules. Caveat: if you are a parent and wish to post here, DO NOT tell us you are a parent OR preach to us about ANYTHING or we will collectively eviscerate you.

Have a great week and enjoy bratfree.com! :1welcome

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"I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell"

:eatu

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kidlesskim

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SlumSlut
LOL I'm reading the part of the original thread where they're googling it for other sites that posted it.

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page 20
"I've seen this thread referenced and linked on at least 3 different boards. 1 on babycenter.com, 1 on grandparents.com and one other I can't recall at the moment. the third is the brat free board. and they all think that SIL has lost her ever-lovin' mind."

Meta-hilarious!

I sort of have a feeling we'll be getting a tidal-wave of new registered (and non-registered) users here.

I guarantee some of you won't like this place! :1wv

Perhaps we should form a "welcome wagon" with several members making a special effort to make unregistered users, especially breeders, fence sitters, and breeder sympathizers, feel welcomed so as not to offend or hurt anyone's feelings. I nominate TeleCat as the welcome committee leader.wink

LOL I was typing the above post before you posted this!

You owe me a Coke!

ETA: read the meta-wank! They linked back to us.

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"I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell"

:eatu

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SlumSlut

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kidlesskim

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SlumSlut
LOL I'm reading the part of the original thread where they're googling it for other sites that posted it.

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page 20
"I've seen this thread referenced and linked on at least 3 different boards. 1 on babycenter.com, 1 on grandparents.com and one other I can't recall at the moment. the third is the brat free board. and they all think that SIL has lost her ever-lovin' mind."

Meta-hilarious!

I sort of have a feeling we'll be getting a tidal-wave of new registered (and non-registered) users here.

I guarantee some of you won't like this place! :1wv

Perhaps we should form a "welcome wagon" with several members making a special effort to make unregistered users, especially breeders, fence sitters, and breeder sympathizers, feel welcomed so as not to offend or hurt anyone's feelings. I nominate TeleCat as the welcome committee leader.wink

LOL I was typing the above post before you posted this!

You owe me a Coke!

ETA: read the meta-wank! They linked back to us.

Can I perform warped, twisted science experiments on them? Please?

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Eldergal
Another from the original board where it's located: y'all showed up on a google search [as did several other sites, apparently]. I will say, I'm so glad there are so many other wonderful sane people in the world!


Wow, was going to throw in a smiley, y'all have some pretty freaking awesome emoticons!

We are the Lords of the Emoticons!

I have relatives that are good for this sort of shit. They know better than to bother my ass with it.

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Also, we thank you in advance for reading our rules. Caveat: if you are a parent and wish to post here, DO NOT tell us you are a parent OR preach to us about ANYTHING or we will collectively eviscerate you.

(sneaks in, disguised as a pairant)

All you childfree people are just bitter that don't have any kids of your own. My little Jaidynn will be 58 and three-quarter months next week and he's already taking--

(gets hit in the back of the head with a barstool that breaks apart on impact)

(grunting in pain, rubbing head) Yep, that's how it works here at Bratfree. Enjoy your stay and pass me a box of gauze wraps and some Witch Hazel.

Someone mentioned that the thread had gone viral and I went looking, just to see what others on other boards thought of the whole thing. That's all. I'm not a mod or anything.

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Tiramisu
Someone mentioned that the thread had gone viral and I went looking, just to see what others on other boards thought of the whole thing. That's all. I'm not a mod or anything.

The part about the SIL losing her mind? That pretty much is my thought. There are some in my family that would try something like that if they thought someone would actually fall for it. They don't bother with me much, which works for me.

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Tiramisu
Someone mentioned that the thread had gone viral and I went looking, just to see what others on other boards thought of the whole thing. That's all. I'm not a mod or anything.

It wouldn't surprise me.

50 years ago there was of course no e-mail, but if you had sent out a postcard assigning "shifts" to relatives to help take care of your newborn, I think you'd either be laughed at, or perhaps recommended to be institutionalized.

With today's culture we're seeing a new brand of "parent" emerge. She's a self-entitled, self-serving, self-centered person who truly believes that she has done something remarkable in giving birth.

But I don't think that this person just emerged into a monster overnight. This person has been developing for years. this person is the product of: "stranger danger," bicycle helmet laws, bully paranoia, Facebook, preggo parking spaces, playdates, babystalking acceptance, in vitro fertilization, "A Baby Story"/"Bringing Home Baby"/"A Wedding Story"/"Bridezillas", and the self-esteem movement of the 1970s. When you put all of these pieces together, parenthood seems like a daunting task reserved for a special kind of citizen--and that citizen should have special rights and privileges that other second-class citizens do not have.

In the end, the entitlemoo has no reason NOT to believe that she's not the boss of and more important than the other second-class citizens.

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StudioFiftyFour

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Tiramisu
Someone mentioned that the thread had gone viral and I went looking, just to see what others on other boards thought of the whole thing. That's all. I'm not a mod or anything.

It wouldn't surprise me.

50 years ago there was of course no e-mail, but if you had sent out a postcard assigning "shifts" to relatives to help take care of your newborn, I think you'd either be laughed at, or perhaps recommended to be institutionalized.

With today's culture we're seeing a new brand of "parent" emerge. She's a self-entitled, self-serving, self-centered person who truly believes that she has done something remarkable in giving birth.

But I don't think that this person just emerged into a monster overnight. This person has been developing for years. this person is the product of: "stranger danger," bicycle helmet laws, bully paranoia, Facebook, preggo parking spaces, playdates, babystalking acceptance, in vitro fertilization, "A Baby Story"/"Bringing Home Baby"/"A Wedding Story"/"Bridezillas", and the self-esteem movement of the 1970s. When you put all of these pieces together, parenthood seems like a daunting task reserved for a special kind of citizen--and that citizen should have special rights and privileges that other second-class citizens do not have.

In the end, the entitlemoo has no reason NOT to believe that she's not the boss of and more important than the other second-class citizens.

I agree with the entire post, but the part I placed in bold is especially telling. These entitle minded moos don't give OTHER moos the same status as they give themselves! Apparently, when they give birth, it's more miraculous and important and to be held in the highest of esteem than all of the TRILLIONS of women who gave birth before and shall surely drop loaves after them as well. The sheer level of delusions of grandeur and psychotic feelings of superiority it would take for a moo-bitch to feel this way are mind boggling.

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If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!

Hiya K-man... thanks for your input there...
It is entirely within the realm of 'reason' that this woman should be investigated by CPS. It may well already have been on the table somewhere in that family. The OP being a nurse might well be of the opinion some intervention would be needed. Of course this raises the logical pov that both those idiots should have been sterilized before any sprogging.
Whoever did call CPS would probably be crucified.

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children.

The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.

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twocents
Hiya K-man... thanks for your input there...
It is entirely within the realm of 'reason' that this woman should be investigated by CPS. It may well already have been on the table somewhere in that family. The OP being a nurse might well be of the opinion some intervention would be needed. Of course this raises the logical pov that both those idiots should have been sterilized before any sprogging.
Whoever did call CPS would probably be crucified.

Dude - that reminds me - in the US, at least in my state, nurses are "mandated" abuse reporters, and if a nurse makes a report to CPS or Elder Abuse Hotline, Protective Services is REQUIRED to investigate. I seem to recall that the other SIL is also a nurse. If they were BOTH to make a report, CPS would HAVE TO open a case, and they wouldn't have to divulge the identities of whomever made the call.

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"I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell"

:eatu

Oh gosh. UPDATE!!

Someone needs to shove her baybee right back up her twat.