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Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf

Posted by nathanomir 
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 21, 2012
Quote
reaperess
Quote
ladybug2203
This is CANNIBALISM!

I got an image of a crazed moo holding her placenta aloft, shouting, "This is not cannibalism, THIS IS PLACENTA!!!" a la 300.

I'm going to have nightmares about this image! Thank you very much!
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 21, 2012
Eating ANY part of the human body is cannibalism. End. Of. Story.

This has got to be the most disgusting thing ever!!!!!

Note to nasty moos: If your body is rejecting something out of it, it is doing this for a reason.
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 21, 2012
Quote
reaperess
Quote
ladybug2203
This is CANNIBALISM!

I got an image of a crazed moo holding her placenta aloft, shouting, "This is not cannibalism, THIS IS PLACENTA!!!" a la 300.


Then we shall breastfeed in the shade...

_______________________________________________
“There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man.”
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 22, 2012
Oh my god? :goggle two faces puking

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
So.. We know that food and water are running out, with overpopulation and all... Yet people keep on poppin' out those babies! I guess they want to have their baby and eat it too...

My top reason is that parenting gives you a free license to be selfish based purely on the fact that you're being selfish for an emanation of your own self. The illusion that what you do to benefit your children benefits them solely is a fallacy. Every parent benefits from the benefits that their children receive. Henceforth, it gives one a license to perpetuate a dog-eat-dog mentality that I perceive to be amoral. Parents say that their children are their greatest loves, what they forget to add is that they are their ONLY loves and only because their children are a reflection of themselves. I prefer to be able to love multiple people and have lasting relationships of many types and possess the essential core value of empathy for all than to restrict myself to an echo chamber of ego-masturbation and self-serving chicanery.

In short: Not parenting makes you a better person.
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 22, 2012
http://www.landmilkhoney.com/recipanr.htm

Udder Juice Recipes

Vanilla Breast Milk Cupcakes with Strawberry Frosting
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 cup butter
3/4 cup sugar
2 eggs
1/2 cup breast milk
1/2 cup plain yogurt
1/2 tsp vanilla
Strawberry Buttercream Frosting

1/4 cup butter, softened
3 strawberries, hulled and chopped up
1 1/4 cups icing sugar
1/8 cup breastmilk
1/8 cup half-and-half
1 tsp vanilla
Directions:

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Line 18 muffin cups with liners. Set aside.In a medium bowl, stir together the flour, baking soda, and baking powder until well mixed.In a large bowl with an electric mixer on medium-high speed, cream together the butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Beat in the eggs, one at a time. With the mixer on low speed, beat the flour mixture alternately with the yogurt and breast milk. Beat in the vanilla. Pour the batter into the muffin cups.

Bake the cupcakes until golden on top and a toothpick inserted in the center of each comes out clean, about 15 minutes. Transfer the pan to a rack to cool completely.Meanwhile, prepare the frosting. Cream the butter until it is pale and fluffy. Add the strawberries: beat for 30 seconds. Then add the icing sugar, 1/2 cup at a time until well blended. Add the breast milk and cream, alternately by spoonfuls, beating until blended. Add the vanilla and beat until well incorporated.Spread the frosting on the cooled cupcakes and place a piece of strawberry on the top of each.


BREASTMILK POPSICLES - FROZEN BREASTMILK ON A STICK
These are very easy to make and fun twist on breastmilk.

You can purchase a single Popsicle mold (that holds 4 popsicles) from the dollar store or anywhere else that you can think of that would carry popsicle molds, ie., Target? Walmart?

After washing and rinsing well, pour expressed breastmilk into the mold and freeze. Thus you and/or partner have a great tasty treat to...suck on.


CREAMY CORN CHOWDER
Ingredients:
1 lb. bacon
1 stick celery
1 onion
4 cup diced potatoes
2 tsp. butter
2 cup breast milk
1 (13 ounce) can evaporated milk
2 (15 ounce) cans corn (1 plain, drained, 1 creamed)
1 cup water
Directions: Dice bacon; fry crisp. Drain off grease. Sautee' diced onion and celery in butter. Add diced potatoes; pour 1 cup water and cover. Cook 20 minutes. Add corn. Stir in breast milk and evaporated milk. Heat to serve. Sprinkle bacon on top.


FROTHY
2 cups breastmilk
1 6-ounce can frozen orange juice concentrate
1/2 cup sifted powdered sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla
4 to 6 large ice cubes

Directions: In a blender container combine breast milk, orange juice concentrate,
powdered sugar and vanilla. Cover and blend until smooth. With the blender running, add ice cubes, 1 at a time, through opening in lid; blend until smooth and frothy. Pour into tall glasses; serve immediately. THIS shit concoction isn't even cooked or frozen to kill the bacteria!two faces puking
Makes 4 (8-ounce) servings.



JAVA CHILL

2 cups breastmilk
3/4 cup brewed espresso or double-strength coffee, preferably dark-roast
2 teaspoons granulated sugar
2 ounces dark or bittersweet chocolate, chopped

Directions: The night before, fill an ice cube tray with breast milk. Freeze
solid. Chill brewed coffee in the refrigerator. Finish in two batches, so the blender won't overflow: place half the milk cubes in the container. Add half the coffee and one teaspoon of the sugar and blend until smooth. Add one ounce chopped chocolate and blend 10-30 seconds, until chocolate is well blended. Pour into tall, frosted glasses and repeat with the remaining ingredients.

Makes 2 servings.


OL'MILKSHAKE
1 cup breastmilk
1 peeled, sliced ripe banana
2 tablespoons frozen apple or guava juice concentrate
2 ice cubes

Directions: In a blender container, combine 1 cup breastmilk, 1 peeled, sliced
ripe banana, 2 tablespoons frozen apple or guava juice concentrate and 2 ice cubes. Cover and blend until smooth and frothy. Stir in a few drops of green food coloring to celebrate St. Patrick's Day. Pour into glass. Prepare and serve immediately. MORE uncooked vile shit

Hint: Leftover ripe bananas can be peeled, cut in chunks, and frozen in plastic freezer bags. When added to smoothies in frozen state, ice cubes are not necessary. "Hint" DO NOT CONSUME

Makes 1 serving. and that's ONE serving too many!


There are plenty more too including muffins, French toast, macaroni and cheese, and casseroles.two faces puking

------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- -------
If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 22, 2012
I kind of like the cupcake and frosting recipe. I wonder if regular milk can be substituted for hygiene's sake (that and the fact that I don't have modified sweat pouring out of my modified sweat glands). Perhaps I'll go over there and ask them. :biggrin2

It's your hell; you rot in it!
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 22, 2012
From the above site:

BREASTMILK BREAD STARTER

2 1/2 cups warm (110 degrees) breastmilk
1 package (1 tablespoon) active dry yeast
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon sugar

In glass or ceramic bowl, soften the yeast in 1/2 cup breastmilk. Stir in the remaining 2 cups breastmilk, flour and sugar. Cover loosely with a dish towel and let stand at room temperature until bubbly. This may take up to 10 days--the warmer the room, the quicker the fermentation. Stir 2 to 3 times a day. The starter will develop a strong "sour" odor as it ferments. When fermentation has occurred, refrigerate the starter until needed.

To keep the starter going: After using 1 cup of starter, add to the remaining 3/4 cup of water or breastmilk, 3/4 cup flour and 1 teaspoon sugar. Stir well. Let stand at room temperature until bubbly, at least 1 day. Cover and refrigerate. If not used within 10 days, stir in 1 teaspoon of sugar. Repeat the addition of 1 teaspoon of sugar every 10 days.

I wonder if they know the yeast is not supposed to come from their crotches.

It's your hell; you rot in it!
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 22, 2012
Y'know, between this thread and the vile vaginas thread...it's like a picnic in the seventh circle of Hell.

----------
michaela

"A child will make two dishes at an entertainment for friends, and when the family dines alone, the fore or hind quarter will make a reasonable dish, and seasoned with a little pepper or salt, will be very good boiled on the fourth day, especially in winter." -Jonathan Swift, A Modest Proposal
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 23, 2012
Quote
kidlesskim

Vanilla Breast Milk Cupcakes with Strawberry Frosting
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 cup butter
3/4 cup sugar
2 eggs
1/2 cup breast milk
1/2 cup plain yogurt
1/2 tsp vanilla
Strawberry Buttercream Frosting

1/4 cup butter, softened
3 strawberries, hulled and chopped up
1 1/4 cups icing sugar
1/8 cup breastmilk
1/8 cup half-and-half
1 tsp vanilla
Directions:

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Line 18 muffin cups with liners. Set aside.In a medium bowl, stir together the flour, baking soda, and baking powder until well mixed.In a large bowl with an electric mixer on medium-high speed, cream together the butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Beat in the eggs, one at a time. With the mixer on low speed, beat the flour mixture alternately with the yogurt and breast milk. Beat in the vanilla. Pour the batter into the muffin cups.

Bake the cupcakes until golden on top and a toothpick inserted in the center of each comes out clean, about 15 minutes. Transfer the pan to a rack to cool completely.Meanwhile, prepare the frosting. Cream the butter until it is pale and fluffy. Add the strawberries: beat for 30 seconds. Then add the icing sugar, 1/2 cup at a time until well blended. Add the breast milk and cream, alternately by spoonfuls, beating until blended. Add the vanilla and beat until well incorporated.Spread the frosting on the cooled cupcakes and place a piece of strawberry on the top of each.

Such a cruel mom this is. Using store bought butter? We all know how bad cow's milk is for the golden child. A real mom who loves her kids will churn her own butter from her own breast milk. This just shows that this mom is not truly looking out for her kid.

:baybie1

P.S. I was going to write that in moomie speak, but my spell check was having a melt-down.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I walk the path of life to my own rhythm, my own beat-if you don't like it, step off and find your own damn song!
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 23, 2012
If they ever come up with a Belgium Wit beer using vag yeast I'm joining AA :goggle

_______________________________________________
“There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man.”
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 23, 2012
Quote
michaela
Y'know, between this thread and the vile vaginas thread...it's like a picnic in the seventh circle of Hell.

Yeah, and the breast milk cupcake recipe dug an eighth level!
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 23, 2012
Quote
thom_c
If they ever come up with a Belgium Wit beer using vag yeast I'm joining AA :goggle

Toi Sennhauser's OPB

Which led me to

Mama's Natural Breakfast

Enjoy the thoughts of vaginal yeast used in beer and bread.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I walk the path of life to my own rhythm, my own beat-if you don't like it, step off and find your own damn song!
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 23, 2012
“Mama’s Natural Breakfast”
At Seattle Erotic Art Festival
2005
Medium: wood, fabric, flour, water, salt, baker’s yeast, vaginal yeast, current STD test (neg)two faces puking

------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- -------
If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 23, 2012
If I knew that all this womyn-cunt-goddess-granola-rainbow-sparkle-queef shit was art, I'd make a bajillion dollars off my cooter by using it as a stamp when I'm on the rag and selling notecards of it.

Not quite as cool as a placenta print, I know.

It's your hell; you rot in it!
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 24, 2012
Quote
KABA
Quote
thom_c
If they ever come up with a Belgium Wit beer using vag yeast I'm joining AA :goggle

Toi Sennhauser's OPB

Which led me to

Mama's Natural Breakfast

Enjoy the thoughts of vaginal yeast used in beer and bread.

....

We can join together.

_______________________

“I was talking about children that have not been properly house-trained. Left to their own impulses and indulged by doting or careless parents almost all children are yahoos. Loud, selfish, cruel, unaffectionate, jealous, perpetually striving for attention, empty-headed, for ever prating or if words fail them simply bawling, their voices grown huge from daily practice: the very worst company in the world. But what I dislike even more than the natural child is the affected child, the hulking oaf of seven or eight that skips heavily about with her hands dangling in front of her -- a little squirrel or bunny-rabbit -- and prattling away in a baby's voice.”


― Patrick O'Brian, The Truelove


lib'-er-ty: the freedom given to you to make the wrong decision, based on the reasoned belief that you will normally make the right one.
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 24, 2012
I picture some earth-mother moo at a birthday party, cleaning the crumbs off the table after dessert. She beams at her gathering of friends and family, presses her fingertips to her swollen udders and says HEY GUYS, GUESS WHAT?*

*This is fiction because as we all know, moos don't clean.

--------------------
"[GFG's pregnancy is] kind of like at the stables where that one dumb, ugly-ass mare broke out of her corral one day and got herself screwed by the equally fugly colt that was due to be gelded the same afternoon."- Shiny
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 24, 2012
I used to think vienna sausages and chorizo was disgusting. Somehow, pig lymph nodes and brains don't seem so bad now.
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
July 24, 2012
I'd hate to think what they'd put in a Salty Dog or Bloody Mary.

------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- -------
If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!
Anonymous User
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
May 19, 2013
Quote
reaperess
If I knew that all this womyn-cunt-goddess-granola-rainbow-sparkle-queef shit was art, I'd make a bajillion dollars off my cooter by using it as a stamp when I'm on the rag and selling notecards of it.

Not quite as cool as a placenta print, I know.

waving hellolarioushysterical laughterzbouncing and laughing
Anonymous User
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
May 19, 2013

Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
May 19, 2013
Here are some somewhat sane links...

Woman regrets doing the placenta thingy

Man's distaste for wife's doing the placenta thingy

There ARE some voices of reason.
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
May 19, 2013
When I saw this had resurfaced, I thought ... TROLL FEST! Nope, it's just a GROSS FEST!

Placenta smoothies. Apparently, it's worse. I was rather naive when I posted this.

.
Re: Placenta Smoothies?????:wtf
May 20, 2013
So..disgusting confession: I have the really bad habit of biting my nails and then swallowing said bitten off bit of nail.

Most people (including myself!!) find this pretty disgusting. I now think that my foul habit is much better considering I could be harvesting bodily waste from other orifices and cooking with it.

*I am trying so hard to break this habit - I've tried the bitter painty on stuff and got used to the taste...
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