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Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?

Posted by Dorisan 
Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
January 31, 2011
Whine meets cheese

I loved this particular response:
Quote

Dear every self-absorbed mother,

As your friend I am aware of the time constraints of spending any time away from your child/ren. That being said, maybe you could agree to meet in the middle on this. I am YOUR friend, not necessarily your child's. Sure I think their cute but..

Please don't all of a sudden look down on my lifestyle. You were right next to me until the bundle of joy came along. Your priorities in life are not any more important than mine, and I do not need to grow up. Try not to judge me because I don't want the same things as you right now, or possibly ever.

Please don't call me while I'm working because your kid's finally napping. Don't call me after their in bed either, I'm probably out enjoying my "wild" life. Please don't complain that your friends don't have time for you because I am always your last priority and don't sit around waiting for your 5 free minutes.

My husband works the next day as well, and so do I. I don't expect you to close bars with me (since I rarely do that myself), but suck it up for a few hours. You may actually have a good time. I have to wear my big girl pants to work the next day, I'm sure you can make it to your living room.

Please don't make me talk to your child on the phone. Nor should you spend the 3 minutes we talk a week, complaining that you haven't showered in 2 days because you "didn't have time". And stop wearing pajamas and sweats out of the house- you look ridiculous.

I've been up since about 5:30, sat in an hour or more of traffic, worked my butt off, made it home by 6 or 7pm, cleaned my house, and then still had time for a few hours of social life. And I did all this without a nap- seriously mothers we're tired of hearing about how ready you are for nap time.

You decided to have a child, not me. I understand that you wanted to dedicate your life to this little person, but my life in no way revolves around your child.

Sincerely,

Every friend you're barely hanging onto


Talk about a page full of Schadenfreude. Check out the other links I found with my usual mining
Dear Boobs: Will You Ever Forgive Me?

I'm 18. I have a 3-year-old daughter and I'm pregnant with a son. Please don't judge me
(then read the comments. Jeezus wept crazy )

So what if my hoo-ha looks like roadkill? Little Peyton Tennessee is worth it!

I don't miss my pre-baby gal pals. (I doubt they're burning to get together with you either)
Anonymous User
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
January 31, 2011
Thanks for these, Dorisan


This one made me wanna double puke : [And please do not have the gumption to look grossed out when my two year old sneezes and gets snot on you. It's mucus, not poop]

Say WHUT?? She is one seriously gross, presumptuous, borderline delusional woman if she thinks it's okay for her brat to spew SNOT(as gross as poop to some of us) on people! It's also riled me up to read that in particular when I am currently on the recovering end of a sneezing-on-me-in-the-grocery-store toadler induced cold/flu thing.Brat!

As for the rest, don't worry, we are way too busy haing FUN(can you still remember what that is,Moo?) to miss you that much when you expect us to either rearrange our schedules to revolve arround your kid's to meet up or just deal and "understand".Yeah, we understand. We understand that ever since that shrieking snot spewer fell out of you, you can't be bothered with us unless we make it completely convenient for you .

Oh, and as for not having a clue what you're dealing with? Wrong We have a clue.Unlike you, though, We got tht clue before it was too late, which is why you're the one with kids! f^@# you!
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
January 31, 2011
A lot of replies are calling this moo self-absorbed. I still maintain children are 1000000% a CHOICE. Even if you did not choose to get pregnant. Abortion is 100% legal in the US and the UK. I don't want to hear how you got pregnant by shagging your baby daddy in the backseat, you made a CHOICE to keep this child. bed.made.lie

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What is a home without children? Quiet. ~Henny Youngman

I don't want people who want to dance, I want people who have to dance. ~George Balanchine

"I took the batteries out of my biological clock and put them in my vibrator"
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
January 31, 2011
Quote
CF_Amy
A lot of replies are calling this moo self-absorbed. I still maintain children are 1000000% a CHOICE. Even if you did not choose to get pregnant. Abortion is 100% legal in the US and the UK. I don't want to hear how you got pregnant by shagging your baby daddy in the backseat, you made a CHOICE to keep this child. bed.made.lie

This.



lab mom
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
January 31, 2011
Dear Boobs,

I know you've been hearing a lot of horror stories about suckling brats, mastitis, clogged ducts, cracked nipples, little teeth, rough grabby hands and so many other unsavory practices.
I only wish to ease your mind, that I have absolutely no intention, to ever expose you, to any of the before mentioned practices. I assure you, that there will be no need for a boob job!


Yours sincerely, Trekkie Monster



P.S. I like you the way you are.

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" ... what's one more once you've already got two shedding on the couch?"
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
January 31, 2011
Quote
WaterLily
Quote
CF_Amy
A lot of replies are calling this moo self-absorbed. I still maintain children are 1000000% a CHOICE. Even if you did not choose to get pregnant. Abortion is 100% legal in the US and the UK. I don't want to hear how you got pregnant by shagging your baby daddy in the backseat, you made a CHOICE to keep this child. bed.made.lie

This.

Yep. My standard retort lately to the "but babies sometimes just happen" bullshit is that with all of the alternatives below, six clear choices were made before a baby "just happened" (to that particular moo, if you count the adopt-it-out option)

Abstinence? No, then....
Alternative sexual satisfaction not leading to fertilization (we all know what the options are) No, then....
Multiple forms of birth control. No/fail, then....
Plan B, readily available OTC. No/fail, then .....
Abortion, legal in all 50 states. No, then.....
Adoption. No, then....
bed.made.lie shut the fuck up about your hard life and stop expecting us to pay for it.
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
January 31, 2011
Well, moos are better off with other moos while CF women stay with other CF women, too. Roll-Eyes
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
January 31, 2011
LOVED the first letter.
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
January 31, 2011
I'd say it's for the best to just sever ties with friends once they shit out kyds. And this is because the friends you knew pre-spawning are now dead and gone forever. In their places are empty, soulless shells of humans vaguely resembling those dead friends who have been enslaved by the needs of the almighty sproggen. These empty shells come equipped with horrible attitudes, an exceptional sense of entitlement, the inability to talk about anything that does not relate to their bastards, sagging physical features, weight gain, visible aging, and a superiority complex. They have ruined their lives, but dammit, they're a hell of a lot better than you are. Roll-Eyes

This is why it makes me sad when I hear friends saying they want kids someday. It's because I know I'll have to cut ties with them, and some of them are people I truly love. But people change when they have kids and I would rather retain the fond memories I have of my real friends rather than be witness to the asshole-clones who replace those friends once they shit out kids. It's kind of like how when I go to a funeral, I will not look in the casket at the body; it's because I want my last memories of that person to be when they were alive, and not dead in a box looking a lot like a wax sculpture. In short, I want good memories of my loved ones and as few bad ones as possible.

If friends somehow manage to be bearable or at least learn to not talk about their fucking potential kids every second, then I will keep them in my life. But I don't expect such luck.
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
January 31, 2011
Quote
Cambion
I'd say it's for the best to just sever ties with friends once they shit out kyds. And this is because the friends you knew pre-spawning are now dead and gone forever. In their places are empty, soulless shells of humans vaguely resembling those dead friends who have been enslaved by the needs of the almighty sproggen. These empty shells come equipped with horrible attitudes, an exceptional sense of entitlement, the inability to talk about anything that does not relate to their bastards, sagging physical features, weight gain, visible aging, and a superiority complex. They have ruined their lives, but dammit, they're a hell of a lot better than you are. Roll-Eyes

This is why it makes me sad when I hear friends saying they want kids someday. It's because I know I'll have to cut ties with them, and some of them are people I truly love. But people change when they have kids and I would rather retain the fond memories I have of my real friends rather than be witness to the asshole-clones who replace those friends once they shit out kids. It's kind of like how when I go to a funeral, I will not look in the casket at the body; it's because I want my last memories of that person to be when they were alive, and not dead in a box looking a lot like a wax sculpture. In short, I want good memories of my loved ones and as few bad ones as possible.

If friends somehow manage to be bearable or at least learn to not talk about their fucking potential kids every second, then I will keep them in my life. But I don't expect such luck.
This.



lab mom
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
January 31, 2011
I completely agree that friends change for the worse when they breed.
It is like the wonderful people that you knew had the life sucked out of them and they are a walking zombie shell.

I have tried to remain at least acquaintances, but all of their focus is on kids and you are not even in the top 100 of their priorities.
It is exhausting even being on the edges looking at their pinball game of ricochet of crisis after crisis.

All of my real friends are child-free or a few very liberal and happy empty nesters.
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
January 31, 2011
From the 18-year-old knocked up again:

"My nurse, however, came and sat on my bed beside me and started telling me how I should have had an abortion with both children! She said how being a young mom is hard and that she didnt think I could handle it! I was shocked, I couldn't believe how someone I didn't even know could be so blunt! All I could do was cry. My fiance was sitting in the chair next to the bed and all he could do was blink!"

I bet her finance was thinking, "How did that nurse read my mind?!"
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
January 31, 2011
Quote
dreamlife
From the 18-year-old knocked up again:

"My nurse, however, came and sat on my bed beside me and started telling me how I should have had an abortion with both children! She said how being a young mom is hard and that she didnt think I could handle it! I was shocked, I couldn't believe how someone I didn't even know could be so blunt! All I could do was cry. My fiance was sitting in the chair next to the bed and all he could do was blink!"

I bet her finance was thinking, "How did that nurse read my mind?!"

Ah, true!!! hilarious That nurse was smart, and had guts. Mentioning abortion to a woman with baby rabies is extremely unpleasant. It reminds me of Alice in Wonderland trying to talk sense to the Queen of Hearts. You cannot make a good point without being crucified.

Being rational and sane, I was the only person in all the world to tell my sister that she ought to have an abortion, and you can imagine how well that went over. Roll-Eyes Okay, she was one month pregnant at the time (so the "baby" was incredibly tiny), but acted as though I were telling her to butcher a puppy or something. She was totally irrational and, of course, did not have an abortion.

Lo and behold!-- now, my sister has a destroyed twat, no social life, no money. Oh, and she never calls, but of course. Not that that bothers me.... bouncing So, yeah, it really is not true that childfree people are the ones ignoring their friends who have kids. It is usually the parents who ignore their childfree/childless friends...for a variety of reasons that have NOTHING to do with being so busy. More like jealous. When CF people ditch friends who have bred, it is most often because breeders' attitudes become so ugly, and they tend to get obsessed with their offspring. Every conversation HAS to include some unsavoury tidbit about little Hunter or Madysen. It gets tiring, gross, boring and unpleasant very quickly. If you don't complain about the ranting, it never stops and drives you insane. If you do complain, you get accused of being insensitive.
_ _ _
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
February 01, 2011
The woman who wrote that letter sounds extremely passive-aggressive. She calls herself "the only adult in the room" and writes an open letter to tell people not to call at a particular time? How much of that could have been avoided if she'd simply told her friend, "Hey, please don't call me after X o'clock, because blah blah blah?" If she has asked her friends not to call then, and they still do, I'd say both sides suck at friendship, but I'm guessing she never said it bluntly, but hemmed and hawed and finally resorted to passive aggression.

So I'm going to conclude that it is primarily the moo who sucks. Her identity has been completely absorbed by the role of mommy. She expects her friends to visit and then spend the visit playing with the kid? What a mega-moo. Send the kid to the grandparents and then talk with your friends about the other things going on in your life...oh, wait, what other things? Every parent I've remained friends with has lots of other things going on, and expect me to have any role at all with their kids.

With any luck that woman will end up with as many friends as she deserves: 0.
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
February 01, 2011
Quote
CF_Amy
A lot of replies are calling this moo self-absorbed. I still maintain children are 1000000% a CHOICE. Even if you did not choose to get pregnant. Abortion is 100% legal in the US and the UK. I don't want to hear how you got pregnant by shagging your baby daddy in the backseat, you made a CHOICE to keep this child. bed.made.lie

i love that a lot of the ones calling out this dipshit are mothers themselves!

"I'm just surprised that this letter writer has any friends to write a letter to! She makes motherhood sound like a concentration camp. While raising children is hard work, it certainly isn't as horrible as this woman makes it sound. Would you like some cheese with that whine? How annoying! It isn't a competition, you don't win something if you are more tired and annoyed. Other people can be tired besides mothers. How self centered you sound. Cleaning up poop, doesn't give you an excuse to be rude, and demanding and whinny. And on that subject, I don't get some moms obsession with the bodily function talk. As I already said, I have 7 kids, I have no desire to discuss their poop, vomit, mucus etc.. I don't want to hear about anybody's poop, vomit... And I don't want your kids mucus on me, it's just as gross as poop. Get a life, you don't sound happy with the one you have."
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
February 01, 2011
The last comment was pure PNB. They tend to still have friends because they know that "mommy" is not all that they are and even they need a break once in a while.

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From a bottle cap message on a Magic Hat #9 beer: Condoms Prevent Minivans
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Tranquilizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle--keep away from children.
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
February 01, 2011
Quote
navi8orgirl
The last comment was pure PNB. They tend to still have friends because they know that "mommy" is not all that they are and even they need a break once in a while.

i know-i was like "Whoa! Go, Mom!"
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
February 01, 2011
Quote
Cambion
These empty shells come equipped with horrible attitudes, an exceptional sense of entitlement, the inability to talk about anything that does not relate to their bastards, sagging physical features, weight gain, visible aging, and a superiority complex. They have ruined their lives, but dammit, they're a hell of a lot better than you are.

I see you've met my family.
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
February 01, 2011
my post:

Posted by J 3 hours 29 minutes ago

dear parent-

I think you are selfish for expecting me to understand you and accommodate you without so much as any give on your part towards me. I appreciate that you now have a child and your life has changed. But my decision to not have a child and to do the things I like to do as I always have done is not an affront to you. Stop acting like I'm the selfish one because you have to make sacrifices for your child.

You expect everybody to kiss your ass, but you do not make any effort on your part to reciprocate, as if doing something every organism on this planet can do bestows upon you a mantle of greatness that all others should be willing and expected to placate and appease. You rush off to your kids' events at the last minute, leaving everybody else to do your work, but complain about what work you'll have to do because I am taking a day off for a concert or art show or some other event I enjoy. You bring in the fund raiser of the month from your child's school, but never even so much as say "Thank you" to the co-workers without kids who you will never have to buy cookies or candles from.

And you say, "it's snot, not poop"-it's a bodily fluid that carries disease. Why do you think they sell tissues and medical professionals want people to cover their mouths and look away when they sneeze? This is another aspect of just how selfish you are-your child should be able to sneeze on your friends, get them sick and possibly miss work or shirk other responsibilities due to sickness, yet they should not even be appalled by this. Better yet, you think they should be happy because it is not fecal matter.
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
February 01, 2011
Another-real mom post:



"Seriously, I am a parent, and I would not want to be friends with you either. You sound like you are fishing for those "poor baby" and those "You are doing the most important job in the world by being a MOMMY!!!", pats on the back. Being a parent does not make your time magically more important, or your lack of sleep any more horrible than a single persons insomnia. This is a competition. You chose to have children. You. And whoever you got to plant his spawn in your belly. Yoiu did not consult your childless friends about this. So why on earth should they have to change their routines and schedules for you?

I am not saying that parenting sucks sometimes. But you know what? Working sucks too. And most workplaces don't let you have a sucky day in your jeans and favorite T-shirt. Also, I worry how this passive aggressive attitude and sense of entitlement are affecting your children. You are your child's first teacher. Based on this letter, you are teaching your children that the world should bend to their will because they are so special and unique. Sorry sweetheart, but that is not how the world turns. The best thing you can do, is teach your children early and often, that the world owes them NOTHING. But they won't get that memo, because mommy is too busy complaining about how her evil childless friends (who are probably totes jealous that you have children and they don't :::eyeroll::smiling, are not bending to her demands. How dare they. Ugh. I have lost my train of thought. It is people like you, letter writer, that make me worry that I am bothering people around me whenever I take my child out in public. Suck it."
Anonymous User
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
February 01, 2011
The pre-baby article and the one complaining about childless friends gives me the impression that parents think only their life has any sort of meaning. Like they're the only ones to have the right to talk about how hard life is. confused I wouldn't be upset at losing friends like that, good riddance I say.
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
February 01, 2011
I just lost a dear friend from High School. She was an intelligent woman who never wanted kids, but married a man who demanded them. Now her Facebook page is loaded with sprog photos. I just hope she's happy now that the damn kid is here - that's all I can do.
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
February 01, 2011
Quote
lotus
The pre-baby article and the one complaining about childless friends gives me the impression that parents think only their life has any sort of meaning. Like they're the only ones to have the right to talk about how hard life is. confused I wouldn't be upset at losing friends like that, good riddance I say.

wtf is that multiple intelligence thing? i heard about it in schools and about the only thing i can gather is that each child is a different alien lifeform...
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
February 01, 2011
I can relate to the first responder. It irritates the shit out of me when my childed sister calls at HER convenience, which is usually not at MY convenience. It's always, "The kids just went to bed", or "The kids just left for school", or "I have a few minutes before the kids get home", etc.............................It seems to go STRAIGHT over her head when I say,"A customer is trying to call in, so I need to go!", as she keeps talking. Sometimes I will say, "I gotta go, my husband just walked in...", yet it seems to be ignored. NOTHING is as important though as when those kids come into the room or get home. My sister is one of the "good" ones too and these complaints I am mentioning are MILD in comparison to how some of my childed friends have behaved in the past. I generally avoid them all when possible, but it's difficult to deal with when a beloved sister does it on some levels too.???

For some reason, ALL childed people I know seem to think that because they have kids, that their needs, their schedules, and their LIFE takes precedence over mine because I have no kids.Flog!

------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- -------
If YOU are the "exception" to what I am saying, then why does my commentary bother you so much?
I don't hate your kids, I HATE YOU!
Anonymous User
Re: Article: Do Your Childless Friends Drive You Crazy?
February 01, 2011
Quote
zatoth
Quote
lotus
The pre-baby article and the one complaining about childless friends gives me the impression that parents think only their life has any sort of meaning. Like they're the only ones to have the right to talk about how hard life is. confused I wouldn't be upset at losing friends like that, good riddance I say.

wtf is that multiple intelligence thing? i heard about it in schools and about the only thing i can gather is that each child is a different alien lifeform...

"Multiple Intelligences is Howard Gardner's psychological theory about people and their different types of intelligences (logical, visual, musical, etc.)."

Here's the LINK that talk's about it.
Also here's a Wikipedia Link that goes into more detail.

It's just a fun online test I took, if seems to identify your strengths or natural talent. That's my impression of it anyway.
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