Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 03, 2015 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 866 |
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 03, 2015 | Registered: 8 years ago Posts: 128 |
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 03, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,308 |
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 03, 2015 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 866 |
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coco uk
Did you read the "retaliatory" article from a CF/CL person? http://thoughtcatalog.com/stephanie-harris/2015/10/6-reasons-i-probably-wont-make-it-to-your-kids-god-awful-event-and-why-i-dont-want-you-to-take-it-personally/
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StudioFiftyFour
My experience has been that unless the event involves a bunch of people bringing a gift for their kydz, breeders seldom want to get together.
Why do you think they've got such a strong sentiment to bring everyone together for the holidays? It has little to do with any religious meaning or sentimental feeling. It's all about a gift/wealth transfer going mostly in their direction.
Anonymous User
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 03, 2015 |
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coco uk
Did you read the "retaliatory" article from a CF/CL person? http://thoughtcatalog.com/stephanie-harris/2015/10/6-reasons-i-probably-wont-make-it-to-your-kids-god-awful-event-and-why-i-dont-want-you-to-take-it-personally/
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 03, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 3,003 |
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gnocchi
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coco uk
Did you read the "retaliatory" article from a CF/CL person? http://thoughtcatalog.com/stephanie-harris/2015/10/6-reasons-i-probably-wont-make-it-to-your-kids-god-awful-event-and-why-i-dont-want-you-to-take-it-personally/
I can never get that site to work for me-- and it's not like I have any restrictions on my laptop. Can you copy-paste, or give a TL;DR version?
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 03, 2015 | Registered: 11 years ago Posts: 380 |
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 04, 2015 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 5,644 |
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 04, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,308 |
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cosmictraveler
Yep, pretty much. Me and my better half have been attending extended famblee gatherings for the last few years since we got married because I felt kind of isolated/disconnected from them after some years of being distant and somewhat estranged, and he didn't grow up in a big family and felt like it might be fun to go to a big, raucous family party. It was kind of fun the first year. The second year was cool too. Last year was boring and annoying. We've decided this year after 3 years of attending the Thanksgiving on my dad's side and the Christmas on my mom's side that hell no, we're opting out this year. Too breederific and all about the chyyyyyldrun. The novelty of our "new" marriage wore off and I never shat out a kyd so they're bored with us and we get virtually ignored, and I'm intending to stay sober (and the boredom and free booze will most likely tempt me too much to rationalize getting drunk). I'm looking forward to not hearing any inane brat-related stories and being ignored (at LEAST they don't really bingo us). I'm looking forward to arranging to have a few cool, CF friends over to hang out and have a little dinner party with. We're still going to pop in to the Christmas on my mom's side to keep my mom from whinging too much, just as a little compromise I'm willing to make, to say we "made an appearance", but we're staying 1 hour max, and not participating in the stupid gift exchange. I'll use my sobriety as an excuse, as it is a valid one, although my real reason is not wanting to interract with the breeder cult.
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 05, 2015 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 951 |
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 05, 2015 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 180 |
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mrs. chinaski
@ Studio54: Big YES to everything...
I went through some of the comments to the article "6 Reasons I Probably Won’t Make It..".
It's scary how many breeders are patting her on the back for her "thoughts" and "honesty". :-(
For those of you who don't want to read the whole article, poster Nics summed it up:
“We have KIDS!!!”
“We are TIRED!!! Like, not normal tired.”
“We DON’T HAVE A BABYSITTER!!! We don’t feel guilty or as if we’re missing out on anything. Sorry, but Not sorry.”
“We actually DO have a FINANCIAL BUDGET and PRIORITIES!!! Not to rain on the parade of your $100/meal dinner party, but this week’s automatic tuition debiting from the Chase account, and the Costco diaper/wipe stock-up will probably hold a higher level of importance for us.”
“WE JUST DON’T WANT TO GO!!!”
Poster Ron analyses the article as follows:
Answers to this:
First of all, you people are not the first people on Earth to ever have children. The fact is you gave your word to people who have spent hard earned money to include and accommodate you. So basically you are using the fact that you copulated and have kids to NOT live up to your word whenever life is a wee bit inconvenient, got it…
You’re tired…OH BOO FREAKING HOO… Everyone get’s tired. Everyone gets exhausted too. It is called time management and planning. You gave your word, you know your are expected and people have gone out of their way to include you. So be responsible and take a nap, go to bed early, plan to be rested for an event you gave your word to attend. It is called being an adult…
No baby sitter? Again planning and management. You know well in advance I am sure that you have a event to attend. I bet if the event were handing out golden eggs and wads of cash your baby sitting problem would instantly go away somehow. This again is you using the fact that you have kids to worm out of honoring your word and in my opinion that is the worst kinda human…
Both can’t come? Fine, but the one who gave their word to be there should be there. Again, you gave your word to people who have spent hard earned money to include and accommodate you…
Budget is blown and can’t afford to go? Although I understand that unexpected things can arise and tap you out financially, Just not showing up because you are broke is not an option. You let your host know and you let them know why (the truth)…You just don’t NOT show up or say anything. Slimy weasels do shit like that, not supposed friends…
You just don’t want to go…Fine… the you should never say you were going in the first place. Also if you do give your word to go and you change your mind, you let your host know right away and not at the last minute. DON’T give your word to attend and then just never show up. What if I took you to the ice cream parlor and got your a could of scoops of ice cream on your favorite cone and then right when I start to hand it to you I throw it in the trash because I changed my mind about doing what I said I was going to do. What if I threw it on the ground and then just walked out on you without so much as an explanation. Yeah when you give your word it is the same thing.
Be adults people. Sure things come up that are unexpected, but your word is something that follows you all your life. If it isn’t worth anything, You are not worth anything…
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 05, 2015 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,201 |
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If ONE of us can’t attend, nine times out of ten NEITHER of us will attend!!! This is a hard one for people to understand, and we’ve lost friendships over the concept. We are Married. We are not pals, boyfriend & girlfriend, or side buddies. We are a union. A team. We make our appearances together in the situations that call for it. This isn’t really negotiable. If hubby is sick and shut in, so am I, and vice-versa. Of course this doesn’t apply to the token Girl’s or Guy’s Night Out. We respect each other’s individualized socialization. I’m referring to the things we are Both hoped to be in attendance for. This also applies to situations where one spouse may think/know that the crowd at a certain event is questionable. Again, nothing personal against You, but we choose not to put ourselves in awkward or obviously drama-filled situations when we don’t have to!
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 05, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 12,440 |
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 05, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 1,304 |
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 05, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,308 |
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mrs. chinaski
@ Studio54: Big YES to everything...
I went through some of the comments to the article "6 Reasons I Probably Won’t Make It..".
It's scary how many breeders are patting her on the back for her "thoughts" and "honesty". :-(
....
Comment from article...
Budget is blown and can’t afford to go? Although I understand that unexpected things can arise and tap you out financially, Just not showing up because you are broke is not an option. You let your host know and you let them know why (the truth)…You just don’t NOT show up or say anything. Slimy weasels do shit like that, not supposed friends…
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 06, 2015 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 951 |
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 11, 2015 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 866 |
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StudioFiftyFour
As for the extended family... please don't tell me that you "missed me at the holiday party." Huh? Let's be real, okay? You missed getting another gift for the kydz. And that's pretty much it.
There has been a very clear pattern established here. Here's what I am invited to: 1. Christmas, 2. Kydz birthday party, 3. Religious events for the kydz. All of these events come with the expectation of a gift.
Isn't it ironic that none of these folks "missed me" the other 360+ days of the year? Did I get invited over for just an ordinary dinner? No. A few beers and a ballgame on the tube? No. To play a board game? No. To celebrate a holiday like, let's say Independence Day, where gifts would not be expected? No. Do they ever just call or e-mail to say hello? No.
And yet these same people have the balls to say, "We really missed you at the holiday party!" Frankly I find it very insulting.
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 11, 2015 | Registered: 12 years ago Posts: 866 |
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bell_flower
I need that rolleyes icon. Hey, I'm MARRIED too. If I have an event to attend and my husband is sick, I'm a big enough girl to go by myself. And I love the "questionable" events reference. I guess that means if the husband is going to a strip club, she's coming too, probably because she feels the need to police his life. .
She sounds like one of those huggy-bear types who is burrowing hard into her husband and not giving him any space to breathe. Too bad True Dud Confessions is defunct and we can't hear what this guy really thinks. He would probably be writing, "Bitch won't let me breathe...she's on me like white on rice 24/7."
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 11, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 12,043 |
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 11, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 1,735 |
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 11, 2015 | Registered: 13 years ago Posts: 2,308 |
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cosmictraveler
This is exactly how I feel about nearly all famblee holiday gatherings now and like the idea of reducing my involvement very much. I'll keep you posted!
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Miss_Hannigan
In my family there's been six babies born in the past 3 years. That's six birthday parties a year for kids of people I don't usually talk to otherwise. Guys, at what level of family do you cut off? I could see attending parties for nieces or nephews because those are kids of immediate family, but the kids of my cousins feel too far removed for me to spend time and money.
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 11, 2015 | Registered: 8 years ago Posts: 71 |
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 11, 2015 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 3,716 |
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cosmictraveler
This is exactly how I feel about nearly all famblee holiday gatherings now and like the idea of reducing my involvement very much. I'll keep you posted!
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 11, 2015 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 3,716 |
Re: Or 6 Reasons I won't invite breeders to anything... October 11, 2015 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 3,716 |
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Miss_Hannigan
In my family there's been six babies born in the past 3 years. That's six birthday parties a year for kids of people I don't usually talk to otherwise. Guys, at what level of family do you cut off? I could see attending parties for nieces or nephews because those are kids of immediate family, but the kids of my cousins feel too far removed for me to spend time and money.