Watch with the private info, people

A parent! Yours?

Sabine, I think Poofy Puff can hook you up with a great deal on dildoes (they are devices used for sex) if you're interested.

Unless she's protecting her top secret sources.

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sabine
A parent! Yours?

I can see yours didn't explain how it works, which I can only assume explains everything else.

Yes. The person who gave birth to me was my parent.

How much did they charge you for the Maternity test on your kids?

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clematis
Sabine, I think Poofy Puff can hook you up with a great deal on dildoes (they are devices used for sex) if you're interested.

Unless she's protecting her top secret sources.

Tsk, tsk clematis - you know Sabine would never be interested in something like sex. Just ask her husband, I'm sure he'll tell you all about it.

And a dildo like that would just be wasted on her - after birthing enough kids to fill a bus, she's better off using something along the lines of a grain silo. A dildo would just disappear into the briny depths, never to return, and we'd hate for the miracle canal to be blocked and all.

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"The secret of dealing successfully with a child is not to be its parent." -- Mel Lazarus
"Women who miscalculate are called mothers." -- Abigail Van Buren
"Better to be deprived of food for three days, than tea for one." -- Chinese proverb

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RatsNotBrats
A dildo would just disappear into the briny depths, never to return, and we'd hate for the miracle canal to be blocked and all.

And imagine her embarrassment when the next calf come hurtling down the water-slide "vagina" with the lost dildo in hand...

No, moron, that's why I had a home c/section at candle light.

home cesarean...

That explains why you opted for the Black & Decker DIY lobotomy too.

Repurposing the candle then? The big, thick, silo-like pillar candle? Euwwwwwww.

A spark of humour!

Hide it, you might get kicked out of here when the admin wakes up.

This is such lovely entertainment.

At the same time, it's totally predictable.

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No, moron, that's why I had a home c/section at candle light.

You have GOT to be fucking kidding me...

clemantis - btw the spark of humour message was not addressed to you, just in case you feel flattered there for a second.

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sabine
No, moron, that's why I had a home c/section at candle light.

A home C-section by candlelight? Aw, aren't you the most adorable little hip mama. You pat yourself often on the back for shirking the cold, emotionless hospital, don't you?

Wow, if that C-Section was performed by candlelight, I certainly hope the doctor could see and didn't cut off something important. If you have a daughter, "she" might have started life out as a son - you'd better double-check on that, Sabine.

And don't worry, sweetheart. I'm sure your childish antics will amuse the admin just as much as it amused us.

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"The secret of dealing successfully with a child is not to be its parent." -- Mel Lazarus
"Women who miscalculate are called mothers." -- Abigail Van Buren
"Better to be deprived of food for three days, than tea for one." -- Chinese proverb

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sabine
No, moron, that's why I had a home c/section at candle light.

Okay, which one of you is doing this to be funny? There is NO WAY a moocow would set herself up with a RIDICULOUS statement like this, no way. Not only is it idiotic, but EVERYONE knows, including us Childfree, that NO MEDICAL DOCTOR would agree to perform a planned cesarean at a home birth, no where and no how, at least not in a civilized country. "By candle light" too, I DON'T THINK SO. If she's letting just anyone with a sharp knife cut on her and drag a baybee out in some rural, remote, and isolated cabin using deerskin as bandages and spinning wheel thread as sutures, I think that would explain a lot. larious

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sabine
clemantis - btw the spark of humour message was not addressed to you, just in case you feel flattered there for a second.

Rut-roh clematis... it's insulting you more than someone else. In case it was somehow important to you to know how you ranked on the "insultedness" spectrum.

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Seacreature - I pinched myself, and I'm not dreaming.. yet.. how can this be possible?

To use your tribe's lingo, who shat you?

Pfft...BWAHAHAHA! Uhm... My 'tribe's' lingo... 'Kay... No one 'shat' me. I just materialized out of thin air one day. My 'tribe' is from the planet Bongo where there are NO children. We just form as adults. I decided to visit this planet and am so very disappointed...

Okay, now this is just getting retarded...

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sabine
KluelessKim - you're sooo behind steam punk technology. I take it you never went on babyfit.com . Look it up.

I had the c/section by the candlelight surrounded by shimmying bellydancers. My husband cut the cord with his teeth and then I breastfed the baby right away for the next 3 days straight.

See, we're obviously stupid because we haven't immersed ourselves in moo-culture and learned all the moo-lingo. So we don't "get" the moo-references.

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sabine
KluelessKim - you're sooo behind steam punk technology. I take it you never went on babyfit.com . Look it up.

I had the c/section by the candlelight surrounded by shimmying bellydancers. My husband cut the cord with his teeth and then I breastfed the baby right away for the next 3 days straight.

LOL. Good one, really. I like the imagery.

Trying to criticize me for not knowing all the moo-speak is like trying to convince me I need to know what the squeaking noises coming from my pet-food means.

I'm pretty sure it means "Holy FUCK that's a big snake!" but I really don't care.

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sabine
KluelessKim - you're sooo behind steam punk technology. I take it you never went on babyfit.com . Look it up.

I had the c/section by the candlelight surrounded by shimmying bellydancers. My husband cut the cord with his teeth and then I breastfed the baby right away for the next 3 days straight.

Ok Sabine, the game's up - who is this? Not that I didn't have a good laugh over this one. Or maybe you're hallucinating, and if you're a mother, I couldn't really fault you for that. A constant diet of Lucky Charms and Sponge Bob is bound to melt the brain into a pile of goo posthaste.

________________________________________________


"The secret of dealing successfully with a child is not to be its parent." -- Mel Lazarus
"Women who miscalculate are called mothers." -- Abigail Van Buren
"Better to be deprived of food for three days, than tea for one." -- Chinese proverb

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sabine
KluelessKim - you're sooo behind steam punk technology. I take it you never went on babyfit.com . Look it up.

I had the c/section by the candlelight surrounded by shimmying bellydancers. My husband cut the cord with his teeth and then I breastfed the baby right away for the next 3 days straight.

You got me on that one as I have never heard of any such nonsense nor have I had any reason to know or learn about it. No rational person I know would entertain such a stupid (and unsafe) idea when planning something like the birth of their child, where anything can go wrong. What are you, some member of a long lost caveman- like tribe or something? He BIT the cord into with his teeth? That is by far one of THE grossest things that I do believe that I have ever heard in my life. Do you share this with many people, show photos, openly discuss it at family gatherings? I think that your insults are entertaining, but if you are making up crap like this to make me sick, I wish that you would stop. I will have nightmares over the visual of THAT craziness.:bawl

Well, I'll give Sabine this much - whoever she is, she was the rare troll that started out with nothing even remotely intelligent, noteworthy, or original - but then gave us a heaping helping of CRAZY.

________________________________________________


"The secret of dealing successfully with a child is not to be its parent." -- Mel Lazarus
"Women who miscalculate are called mothers." -- Abigail Van Buren
"Better to be deprived of food for three days, than tea for one." -- Chinese proverb

RnB, you can borrow my favorite phrase to describe an in-law of mine: one hot ball of crazy. It always makes me smile.

Sorry, but if I drank enough to understand your point of view I'd have to be hospitalized.

You completely fail at using your primary language as a means of communication. I can't translate Stupid.

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sabine
haha hah Konkurrent explain this to dumbass would you please? since you offered to explain to clemantis I presume to ask.. don't get too high on yourself though, there's a limited choice here hahaha

I need this in English, please - and possibly with capital letters at the start of each sentence, if you don't mind. And what in the world are you babbling about, exactly? I think you're just entertaining _yourself_, at this point....

________________________________________________


"The secret of dealing successfully with a child is not to be its parent." -- Mel Lazarus
"Women who miscalculate are called mothers." -- Abigail Van Buren
"Better to be deprived of food for three days, than tea for one." -- Chinese proverb