Moos Lowing Re:Ruined Cooters

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frenzy
Oh, look everyone, we have a homebirth special snowflake who seems to think that just because she gave birth in a similar manner to a dolphin (which, by the way darlin', probably has a higher IQ than you do), she's so amazing. And different. And unique.
No, sweetheart, the minute you breed, you lose the right to call yourself anything beyond mediocre.
If even that.
Also, if that was the most amazing thing in your life, you haven't experienced shit beyond that high school education you taut so greatly, I'm sure.
Travel to a different country, learn yourself on an entirely new culture, create a beloved art style, write a best selling book, and then come back to me and tell me that shoot out a child is the "most amazing thing".

If I'M sad, you're a depressing piece of human being, my friend.
I AM a part of the future generation, and as it stands, my prospects look a lot brighter than yours, dearie.
So please, take your passive aggressive bullshit out of here and go buy a plus sized dildo to satisfy yourself while your mayun is busy doing overtime with the hot secretary at the office.
Granted that hippie fuck has a job in the first damn place.

JUST SAYIN'.

I love how they think they're special for doing what rats and other vermin can do.

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Caramel Turtle
Oh and let's talk about Google diplomas and *we know all about what's happening to a women's va-jay after she gives birth* "cause I sawr dis nasty pickture of a 4th dagree tareeee on the interwebs"
I'm sorry but I caught my own baby in a water birth (something I'm sure none of you will ever experience anything nearly as amazing in your lifetime) and.. ummm... I've had worse *soreness* from rough sex.. mmmkay? Those photos of nasty blown out vaginas you've been graciously provided Google links for are from women who "purple-pushed" their baby out and couldn't feel a damn thing "down there" from their BLESSED epidurals hahahaha. No thanks. Hire a fucking midwife. Educate yourselves. You girls are sad... SAD human beings to be walking along amongst our future generation.

Just sayin'

You just keep telling yourself that, roast beef twat. We all know the real reason you're posting your ramblings on a childfree board, where you are clearly not welcome.

Wow, what a smug cunt.
"Look at how special I am. I water birfed all ma babbies. Bow before my holy greatness!"
I think we should show this bitch what happens when she goes where she's not wanted.

I second that, electricfire. This seacow has yet to understand that nobody here cares about her shredded Steak-umm cunt, her aqua-sluicing adventures, or her opinions about childfree people. Maybe being outed BF style will help her get it.

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CaramelTurtle
"trollcunt" <---witty... pffffffft. You so schmart. Wasn't looking for information on a "ravaged cooter" my cooter is just fine thank you.. though I'm usually sticking something much larger than a vienna sausage in it so I wouldn't REALLY know. Just looking up info on getting a post-baby body back in shape.... and up popped this forum with all this fucking hate. You chicks are nasty. I've been on quite a few forums and never have I seen so much putrid skank talk from ppl that call themselves "women." There's no message boards ragging on dumbfuck chicks that have no meaning in their lives and don't want to "breed." Is this like, to feel better about yourselves?? I mean.. really.. enlighten me. Cause the only thing you have in common is that your hole is for fucking purposes only right? Lol. Yeah... sooo ... I guess I felt the need to stick my two cents in and defend any decent "breeding" soul in this world. ....and then I find myself wasting my free fucking time on... waste.

Fuck off and die in a messy home birth you disgusting moo-cunt iof a troll. Nobody here (this is a childfree board, a place you and the rest of the lowing masses are not welcome) gives a flying fuck about you or any of your breederific herd.

TurtleMoo,

You are a stupid twat who shat a loaf in a pool. Good for you. If that works for you then I am happy for you.

Please return to your forums where putting your baby's health in jeopardy by loaf-shitting the way they did back in the day is glorified.

In case you have failed to notice, this is a CHILDFREE forum where parents are not invited to post. In case you are really dense, this means that if you have given birth you are not welcome here. None of us here are even considering having children, and in fact, this is a forum for folks who are firm on the decision not to have children.

We don't need you to persuade us about the glories of raising infant mortality rates through your ridiculous home birthing and antivax bullshit. I care way more about kyds than most Moos do even though I don't have any of my own.

Now fuck off before the mods wake up and post your info all over the place.

Trolling moo cunt was looking for ways to get her body back in shape post loaf sluicing. WHY do I not believe that??? Be honest, moo. You'd really like to leave the newly shat one in a hot car. Too bad it's October and not even Texas is hot enough for that.

Thank you for the phrase "decent breeding soul." Since you have obviously never heard of an oxymoron I'm going to enlighten you. There's no such thing as a decent breeder.

You've been entertaining for a moment but I'm bored now. Be gone. Before somebody drops a house on you too.

Did I just get to tell off my first troll?:biggrin2

I am so proud.

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CaramelTurtle
Photographer and editor.. successful husband.. traveling. Yup. I just think it's funny there's so much hate here because clearly none of you can manage it ALL... kids, career, social life. Some women are just more... well... women. Soo I'll take my roast beef water sliced twat and leave you back to do what you do best. Leeches. Peace out.

If you're just sooo bizzzy you wouldn't be concerned with trolling a child free forum. Career and social life I have in spades. Kids??? I did better with my life. Leeches??? Um, no. That would be the loaves you regret sluicing. By the way, peace out is a phrase most people give up as soon as they turn twelve. Too bad you didn't mature past that age.

There is no such thing as "having it all." How are you traveling while loaf-shitting in a pool in your living room? Some of us chose to devote our lives to bettering humanity rather than following the easy path of being a Mommy, because we all know when it comes down to it "ma baybee comes first" as you dump your work on ChildFree co-workers.

One more time you dense, have-it-all cow--this is not a forum for you. It is for men and women who have decided to pursue the radical and apparently horrid idea of not having children.

So one more time--fuck off to your own board. You aren't convincing us to loaf-shit, making us feel bad or inferior for not doing so and in a couple of hours some of our mods will have your damn Facebook page and e-mail address up for all to see.

BTW, I was not educated by Google. I have a fucking PhD in epidemiology.

I act professional when in a medical setting but I come here to let loose away from holier than thou cows. YOU are the one not invited to this party, so stop acting like a rabid Baptist at a Hindu holiday and shut-up and go away.

Oh, look, the Cavernous Cunt Cavalcade.

If this moo troll is so pleased with its ruined pussy and resulting crotch dumplings, one has to wonder what it's doing trolling a CF board. If its life is so perfect, how come it feels the need to reply to the posts of such sad, childfree leeches as ourselves.

P.S., cuntpig—we like our wee rant board here, because every day of our lives, we are exposed to pro-natalist bullshit from pig breeders like yourself. Venting, as it were. So perhaps you should waddle along and go vent about us horrid CFers on a moo board where they'll surely thumb those pancakes you call nipples for you until your abysmal cunt dribbles with buttermilk. In conclusion, get your trolling cunt ass out of here and leave us the fuck alone.

Possible vaginal damage never entered in to my decision to be childfree. I don't want to be a parent, so I never really thought about the physical aspects of pregnancy and childbirth. I expect there's very little relationship between fear of pregnancy/childbirth and childfreedom. I don't fear what I have no chance of experiencing, while tokophobes often do opt to have children but give birth with c-section.

I am certain that the extent of tearing shown in those images is not the norm. But it does happen - as we have seen from the quotes Kim found - and I think it's valuable for people to know that this is a possible risk of childbirth because the public face of pronatalism is that everything "snaps back", just as it isn't admitted that you can still die from childbirth, even in modern industrialized nations. It's easy to find online gripes along the lines of "I didn't know it would be like this!" which suggests that there is plenty to be done in terms of educating women of potential outcomes.

Not having an interest in childbirth or statistics relating to it, I cannot dispute what our troll has to say about pain relief leading to an increased risk of complications, although I doubt she can back that up with a published study either. However, I will note that there are charities arguing for better maternity care for women in poor countries with stories about how they are ostracized by the rest of society if they have obstetric fistulas. I'm pretty sure these women weren't given epidurals. After all, we're talking about women who don't even have access to contraceptives, let alone more expensive and complicated medicines.

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frenzy
overstretched sex canyon.

larious

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CaramelTurtle
Photographer and editor.. successful husband.. traveling. Yup. I just think it's funny there's so much hate here because clearly none of you can manage it ALL... kids, career, social life. Some women are just more... well... women. Soo I'll take my roast beef water sliced twat and leave you back to do what you do best. Leeches. Peace out.

What twaddle you stupid twat.

Your claims have as much credibility as the internet tough guys who all claim to be marines, but are actually skinny teenage keyboard warriors. We all know your life is shit, if it wasn't you wouldn't have been so bothered by our comments here.

At least you showed a shred of honesty when you admitted your cunt is ruined. Have fun with your deadbeat husband, if the father is even on the scene at all that is, if you even KNOW who the father is.

Who the fuck are you trying to fool around here? A simple Google search reveals the truth of calving in all its "splendour". But besides that, i have a good friend who is an obstretician and she has no inhibitions in telling the plain stretched truth.

This is the biggest lie among women who calve...try to tell us otherwise so we can fall in the trap and then if some make the mistake to join, take them up for the "stretched cooter club". You can glorify the shit out of calving but as usually, smth. that is overglorified stinks badly.

First thing: No land mammal give birth in water. The fact that dolphins and wales do is a MAJOR evolutional problem, since the first breath of the baby is a serious feat.
So you are stupid to do it. Congratulation however, because by having given birth to your pwechus snowflayke on a birth pool filled with feces you have effectively taught him/her that the world is made of Shit from the get-going. It is important to teach that to your young.

Second thing: Epidurals are associated to higher risk of vaginal tearing? Citation please. "My doula/CPM/Lay midwife said so" doesn't count.

I would also strongly applaud you on your homebirth. Really. Please, if you have other children, do it again. If the World has any luck, either this will kill you, or render you sterile, or prevent an excessive spreading of defective genes by killing your future pwechus snowflayke.
So, carry on!

_______________________

“I was talking about children that have not been properly house-trained. Left to their own impulses and indulged by doting or careless parents almost all children are yahoos. Loud, selfish, cruel, unaffectionate, jealous, perpetually striving for attention, empty-headed, for ever prating or if words fail them simply bawling, their voices grown huge from daily practice: the very worst company in the world. But what I dislike even more than the natural child is the affected child, the hulking oaf of seven or eight that skips heavily about with her hands dangling in front of her -- a little squirrel or bunny-rabbit -- and prattling away in a baby's voice.”


― Patrick O'Brian, The Truelove


lib'-er-ty: the freedom given to you to make the wrong decision, based on the reasoned belief that you will normally make the right one.

Yawn.
Okay, I admit you were entertaining for a moment, but now you're just rehashing old bingos. Boring.
Waddle on back to the barn, moooooo.

I support the public embarrassment of moos who chose to post on this Child Free board.

Perhaps, a policy could be instated about when and how their personal information goes public.
(Ie one post = warning, 2 posts = sample of public information goes out with a warning, 3 posts = start of personal information being publicized)

“…..overstretched sex canyon…”

“…..hamburger mashed pussy you're flapping in the breeze like sheets hung on the line during laundry day roast beef twat …”

“…..shredded Steak-umm cunt, her aqua-sluicing adventures…”

“…..Cavernous Cunt Cavalcade…”

“…..thumb those pancakes you call nipples for you until your abysmal cunt dribbles with buttermilk…”


I just wanted to see all those colorful phrases in one spot larious

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I'm SO glad that the human race

I, for one, do not care if the human race dies out. It seems to have done a piss poor job as a species.

Don't you have kydz to be taking care of, troll?

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Caramel Turtle
I've had better orgasms after 3 kids than I ever did before.. and isn't that what really counts?

First she swears it "snaps back", but we know that's a load of horseshit... Then this line. This line means she's just lying to herself. HER enjoyment is what really counts, nevermind what's left for her poor sperm donor. And then somewhere else a line about something much bigger than a sausage... Insecure much? I've never had to leap to the defense of anything I wasn't slightly insecure about, so that really gives it all away.

Her hallway is way too big for the diminutive hotdog her wallet is brandishing, and she was looking for ways to tighten it up when she found us. When the meat flaps get to swinging she thinks it's a phenomenal orgasm. LOL.

Three posts and no outing yet? Please? I want to laugh even more than I already did this morning at finding this pissy troll whining.

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"[GFG's pregnancy is] kind of like at the stables where that one dumb, ugly-ass mare broke out of her corral one day and got herself screwed by the equally fugly colt that was due to be gelded the same afternoon."- Shiny

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Presto nli

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Caramel Turtle
I've had better orgasms after 3 kids than I ever did before.. and isn't that what really counts?

First she swears it "snaps back", but we know that's a load of horseshit... Then this line. This line means she's just lying to herself. HER enjoyment is what really counts, nevermind what's left for her poor sperm donor. And then somewhere else a line about something much bigger than a sausage... Insecure much? I've never had to leap to the defense of anything I wasn't slightly insecure about, so that really gives it all away.

Her hallway is way too big for the diminutive hotdog her wallet is brandishing, and she was looking for ways to tighten it up when she found us. When the meat flaps get to swinging she thinks it's a phenomenal orgasm. LOL.

Three posts and no outing yet? Please? I want to laugh even more than I already did this morning at finding this pissy troll whining.

I suspect that what she fails to mention is that the better orgasms aren't being caused by her sperm donor, but by her living nipple clamps.

"Photographer and editor?" That means her husband bought her an expensive camera (because you know she doesn't work to earn her own money), hasn't actually learned to use it but lets the camera do all the work and then just fiddles around in Photoshop or Lightroom. She either has a mommy blog or a food blog or a combination of the two and calls it "working."

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"Why children take so long to grow? They eat and drink like pig and give nothing back. Must find way to accelerate process..."
- Dr. Yi Suchong, Bioshock

"Society does not need more children; but it does need more loved children. Quite literally, we cannot afford unloved children - but we pay heavily for them every day. There should not be the slightest communal concern when a woman elects to destroy the life of her thousandth-of-an-ounce embryo. But all society should rise up in alarm when it hears that a baby that is not wanted is about to be born."
- Garrett Hardin

"I feel like there's a message involved here somehow, but then I couldn't stop laughing at all the plotholes, like the part when North Korea has food."
- Youtube commentor referring to a North Korean cartoon.

"Reality is a bitch when it slowly crawls out of your vagina and shits in your lap."
- Reddit comment

"Bitch wants a baby, so we're gonna fuck now. #bareback"
- Cambion

Oh whatever. Abortion doctors are crimestoppers."
- Miss Hannigan