What other life choice "bingoes" do you get?

-I am bingoed constantly about not being married (I'm am 24 for Christ's sake) and having not been with my boyfriend for long. My sister (who is 27) met her now husband when she was 18 - nothing wrong with that - but they have a horrible, immature relationship, and always have... And she is starting to push the baby rabies card with him.

-Constantly nagged for not getting "a better job" than teaching high school mathematics with my BA. I'm currently in grad school, and my teaching job is the highest paying choice (I shit you not) with the right hours for my schedule.

-I constantly hear the "Why don't you settle down with somebody?" crap. If I want to settle down, I will, and it will be with the RIGHT person, not the first guy who shows interest in me.

WARNING: LONG, VERY LONG

Things for which I have been bingoed or given flak:

-For never learning to drive (I'm 18)
-For not having a job until I turned 18
-For not having tattoos and a thousand like every other wannabe "rebel"
-For not having a boyfriend and never having dated or had sex
-For not having an OMG CLOSE and OMG HUGE family
-For having no interest in smoking, drinking, drugging, or sexing
-For taking a major in English Literature and not Engineering, Business, Chemistry, Biology, Psychology, Education...any of the so-called money makers. Damn it, I like English Lit.
-For taking Photography as a minor ("Why are you even dedicating yourself to this program if it's just a minor?")
-For not appearing happy/bubbly enough
-For not liking to socialize
-For taking things too literally
-For not liking any of the "theatrical" pop singers ("But Katy Perry/Lady Gaga/Adam Lambert love Freddie Mercury and like to perform over the top; they're just like him!" NO THEY FUCKING AREN'T
-For not liking the Beatles despite liking classic rock and not liking the Red Hit Chili Peppers despite being from California
-For hating my high school classmates from day one and understanding how shit like Columbine could have happened
-For not attending all the parties
-For not giving in to unwanted attention to some jock with a lump in his pants
-For not taking up an instrument or a sport
-For not liking the Big Bang Theory even though "it's a smart comedy and the one character is just like you!"
-For generally disliking covers of songs I like
-For insisting on proper grammar
-For "talking too fast"
-For being a bit too conservative (in some respects; clearly not all) for Austin
-For liking Sheriff Joe
-For liking Sheriff Joe (red trait) and abortion (blue trait) at the same time. MINDSPLOSION
-For favoring eugenics
-For insisting that being misunderstood does not make a person an artist
-For liking pasty, nerdy, and slightly dumpy white men instead of guys who look like they belong in People magazine
-For preferring potential partners of my same ethnicity (as ethnic as being white can get, I suppose)
-For refusing to consider a breast reduction
-For not wanting to be in pictures
-For not wanting to tutor the underprivileged/stupid
-For suggesting that breast cancer money-grubbing be "demoted"
-For suggesting that death row inmates, having forfeited their rights by infringing on someone else's, should have their organs harvested and transplanted into viable people who deserve them. They won't need that lobe of liver much longer...
-For suggesting that scholarships be based on merit
-For not watching trash television
-For liking creamed corn
-For liking poor white trash food ("But why, when you have so many options and organic stuff?" "Fuck you and unhand my Spaghetti-Os!")
-For choosing a private university over a state university
-For never learning to swim
-For my allegedly "abrasive" personality
-For using Twitter, but not Facebook
-For not liking green/white/oddly flavored tea. Lipton, please, with sugar and ice.

Why can't people just mind themselves? Why do they feel the need for me to fit their perceptions? Why do they think they know what I should or should not do or like?

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michaela

"A child will make two dishes at an entertainment for friends, and when the family dines alone, the fore or hind quarter will make a reasonable dish, and seasoned with a little pepper or salt, will be very good boiled on the fourth day, especially in winter." -Jonathan Swift, A Modest Proposal

I won't learn to swim and I refuse to own a swimsuit. I see no reason to share a liquid cesspool with filthy brats and I'm often called a bitch for this. Anyone heard of the nasty diseases brats carry these days? I'd rather not take the chance.

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satansbitch
I won't learn to swim and I refuse to own a swimsuit. I see no reason to share a liquid cesspool with filthy brats and I'm often called a bitch for this. Anyone heard of the nasty diseases brats carry these days? I'd rather not take the chance.

In a way, I've been bingoed in the past for this.

When I was a kid, we had an inground pool and I was actually uncomfortable with the idea of getting into the water, so for a long time, I didn't. This actually worked to my advantage because my sister and brothers, who loved tormenting me, enjoyed going swimming so when they'd go out to swim, I could just stay in by myself and do my own thing without them bothering me.

However, my brother convinced my parents that I should learn how to swim and he tried to teach me by threatening me, holding me under in the deep end of the pool, yelling at me like a drill sargeant, and the like, which of course didn't work. After that, whenever my sister went to swim, I was forced to go in too, wading in the shallow end, which made no sense to me, and I didn't like it at all. My sister took advantage of this by often deciding to go swimming when I was doing something I enjoyed. I was told that swimming isn't a choice and that everyone swims and everyone likes it.

This went on for 2 summers until my parents finally put in me lessons with the promise that once I learned, I'd have a choice from then on. Of course that promise wasn't kept, and I was enrolled in more lessons and still forced to swim against my will. I was having leg pain and was diagnosed with tibial torsion and the doctor wanted to do surgery but my mother didn't want me having surgery, she convinced me that problem would go away if I just swam and got my legs suntanned. They actually tried to convince me if I stopped being interested in everything else and only swam and got suntanned, all my problems would just go away.

Then one summer they took everything away from me, meaning no reading, to TV, no music, no anything but getting into the pool everyday when my sister said so to "build me up into a human being," and I was absolutely miserable and of course my sister rubbed my face in it constantly saying "you're bad so you can't do anything" and " you don't have any rights because you're bad" and "I'm going to own you for the rest of your life so just shut up and do what I say." Fortunately, that was the last summer of forced swimming, but it left a lasting impact on me.

Today, I refuse to own a bathing suit too and I will never get into a pool again as long as I live. My wife and I went to a casino resort to see a concert for our anniversary and asked if i wanted to get a bathing suit so we could enjoy the pool and I of course, refused, stating the truth that I'm not comfortable in the water, which she understood.

My mother, before we stopped speaking, still indirectly bingoed me about swimming, insisting that since we had a pool, I could swim and loved it from the time I could walk, and if I challenged that, she would have a meltdown. She told many other people the same thing, and I don't know why. I guess to her, having no interest in swimming was a disgrace that she, after being convinced by my brother it was a problem, couldn't live with.

JD

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michaela
Things for which I have been bingoed or given flak:

-For not having tattoos and a thousand like every other wannabe "rebel"
-For having no interest in smoking, drinking, drugging, or sexing
-For not appearing happy/bubbly enough
-For not liking to socialize
-For hating my high school classmates from day one and understanding how shit like Columbine could have happened
-For not attending all the parties
-For not taking up an instrument or a sport
-For being a bit too conservative (in some respects; clearly not all) for Austin
-For not wanting to be in pictures
-For suggesting that scholarships be based on merit
-For not watching trash television
-For never learning to swim
-For my allegedly "abrasive" personality

Why can't people just mind themselves? Why do they feel the need for me to fit their perceptions? Why do they think they know what I should or should not do or like?

I've gotten flak for these things on your list too, except for the swimming part, I learned against my will, but if I had been left alone, I would have never learned either. As for the conservative part, just substitute New Orleans(where I no longer live and won't go back) for Austin.

I don't criticize others for their life choices and I want the same consideration.

JD

JD,

What's with your parents and that swimming? I've read that story before and I am amazed every time I hear it. I know breeders are crazy, but that just takes the cake. Somehow that bothers me even more than Cambion's mom and the tampons. I've heard that some guys keep trying to make their sons like football and play basketball but usually it doesn't go to the extreme your parents went to. And usually it is just duh....I've never seen a female get as psycho about her offspring and a sport as your mother did. Wow. Some of this stuff I hear on this board makes my breeders look sane. And that's saying a lot. :hs

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peace-n-quiet
JD,

What's with your parents and that swimming? I've read that story before and I am amazed every time I hear it. I know breeders are crazy, but that just takes the cake. Somehow that bothers me even more than Cambion's mom and the tampons. I've heard that some guys keep trying to make their sons like football and play basketball but usually it doesn't go to the extreme your parents went to. And usually it is just duh....I've never seen a female get as psycho about her offspring and a sport as your mother did. Wow. Some of this stuff I hear on this board makes my breeders look sane. And that's saying a lot. :hs

I have no idea, other than it was a way to force me to conform to some ideal image of what a person should be. I'm just glad I never went to a school with a swim team because if I tried out and got cut, I know there would have been hell to pay at home.

My brother, who started it, said I needed to know how to swim in case I fell in the pool, which makes sense, but if that were the case, once I learned and demonstrated I could swim, the whole thing would have ended and I'd have been left alone. However, I ended up with more lessons, parents searching for a place with an indoor pool I could go to in the winter so I wouldn't be spending my time away from school doing other things(fortunately, they didn't find such a place), and continually having swimming crammed down my throat.

Ironically, the brother who started it didn't learn to swim himself until he was 17 years old and only learned because the school he was going to attend for college had it in the curriculum. If it hadn't, he'd have probably never learned either. I guess he didn't think I was worthy of having the same rights and choices he had.

It may sound strange but even today, I'm still uncomfortable talking about it. I went through a period of depression 17 years ago and was even afraid to talk about it to the therapist I went to, so I didn't. What even made it harder was my parents didn't try to micromanage me like that in the past they just let me be and seemed to accept me as I was, but all that had to change because of swimming.

Maybe you're right, breeders are just plain crazy, even some of our own parents.

JD

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JohnDrake

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satansbitch
I won't learn to swim and I refuse to own a swimsuit. I see no reason to share a liquid cesspool with filthy brats and I'm often called a bitch for this. Anyone heard of the nasty diseases brats carry these days? I'd rather not take the chance.

In a way, I've been bingoed in the past for this.

When I was a kid, we had an inground pool and I was actually uncomfortable with the idea of getting into the water, so for a long time, I didn't. This actually worked to my advantage because my sister and brothers, who loved tormenting me, enjoyed going swimming so when they'd go out to swim, I could just stay in by myself and do my own thing without them bothering me.

However, my brother convinced my parents that I should learn how to swim and he tried to teach me by threatening me, holding me under in the deep end of the pool, yelling at me like a drill sargeant, and the like, which of course didn't work. After that, whenever my sister went to swim, I was forced to go in too, wading in the shallow end, which made no sense to me, and I didn't like it at all. My sister took advantage of this by often deciding to go swimming when I was doing something I enjoyed. I was told that swimming isn't a choice and that everyone swims and everyone likes it.

This went on for 2 summers until my parents finally put in me lessons with the promise that once I learned, I'd have a choice from then on. Of course that promise wasn't kept, and I was enrolled in more lessons and still forced to swim against my will. I was having leg pain and was diagnosed with tibial torsion and the doctor wanted to do surgery but my mother didn't want me having surgery, she convinced me that problem would go away if I just swam and got my legs suntanned. They actually tried to convince me if I stopped being interested in everything else and only swam and got suntanned, all my problems would just go away.

Then one summer they took everything away from me, meaning no reading, to TV, no music, no anything but getting into the pool everyday when my sister said so to "build me up into a human being," and I was absolutely miserable and of course my sister rubbed my face in it constantly saying "you're bad so you can't do anything" and " you don't have any rights because you're bad" and "I'm going to own you for the rest of your life so just shut up and do what I say." Fortunately, that was the last summer of forced swimming, but it left a lasting impact on me.

Today, I refuse to own a bathing suit too and I will never get into a pool again as long as I live. My wife and I went to a casino resort to see a concert for our anniversary and asked if i wanted to get a bathing suit so we could enjoy the pool and I of course, refused, stating the truth that I'm not comfortable in the water, which she understood.

My mother, before we stopped speaking, still indirectly bingoed me about swimming, insisting that since we had a pool, I could swim and loved it from the time I could walk, and if I challenged that, she would have a meltdown. She told many other people the same thing, and I don't know why. I guess to her, having no interest in swimming was a disgrace that she, after being convinced by my brother it was a problem, couldn't live with.

JD

Jesus. Fucking. Christ.

Your story makes my mother look like a saint! What about your sister, if you don't mind my asking?

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toomanybrats
Jesus. Fucking. Christ.

Your story makes my mother look like a saint! What about your sister, if you don't mind my asking?

She was one of those people who likes having everything their way and would never compromise, and our parents usually backed her up. She was the so called "Golden Daughter" who could do no wrong. Both of my parents admitted my sister was spoiled because she was the only girl, but they never did anything to change that. She was always very dicatatorial and even though my parents actually complained about that, again they backed her up in it, which my story about swimming is an example of.

On the topic of this thread, another bingo I've gotten is how I prefer staying in over going out. I'm just not a party person, don't like noisy places, etc. For some reason when I started college and my sister started trying to get into medical school, she wanted me to go everywhere with her, and our parents insisted I had to go with her so I could support her getting into medical school. They even threatened to insitutionalize me because if I stayed in too much, I'd end up with some sort of personality disorder. Even when I went out and did my own activities, I still had to go do whatever she did with her, because according to them, what I did wasn't really going out. Apparently, the only kind of going out activities that will keep my personality from warping are activities chosen by and done with my sister, going out on my own to do something else is the same as staying in.

I'll never understand why people can't just live and let live.

JD

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michaela
-For not liking the Big Bang Theory even though "it's a smart comedy and the one character is just like you!"

I hated the two episodes I've seen. It's just another tee-hee-hee geeks plus hot girl they run after. If one of the smart characters had been female, it might have been a little different, but as it is, it's just more of the same old sexist twaddle.

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yurble

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michaela
-For not liking the Big Bang Theory even though "it's a smart comedy and the one character is just like you!"

I hated the two episodes I've seen. It's just another tee-hee-hee geeks plus hot girl they run after. If one of the smart characters had been female, it might have been a little different, but as it is, it's just more of the same old sexist twaddle.

That was what I thought when I first saw it. It was supposed to be funny and I sat through it with a straight face.

I have enjoyed the responses in this thread. Most of them seem to apply to me as well.

I recently decided to change jobs. The new job being a sort of hybrid between my old job and what I actually got my degree in. Also, they offered me a little more money and another week of vacation.

Sounds good, right? I know I'm taking a leap of faith here, since I had been at my old job for a while and am a Very Good Employee who Knows Her Stuff, according to well... everyone.

Anyway, during the last couple of weeks on the job there were a lot of different reactions I received from my fellow co-workers. Some people were angry, some sad, some were excited for me and congratulated me on getting the heck outta there! However.... this one prick decided he would loudly announce that the only reason I was leaving was because I am GREEDY and I LOVE MONEY.

Now, this is not even a person I deal with on a daily basis. I don't work directly for, near, or around this person and we have limited contact. I rarely exchange two words with him. I'm not sure what he thought he was accomplishing my walking around and loudly announcing that I was a GREEDY PERSON and WAS A LOVER OF MONEY.

cockbag sonsabitches!

Can't a person make a life choice for themself without people getting all weird about it? I've also had people tell me that I'm "spoiled" because... well.. I don't know. I bought a car? I took a vacation? Well fuckity fuck. I work. My husband works. We have no kids. Are we not allowed to enjoy the fruits of our labor? Grrrrrrrrrrrr. So glad I'm out of that place. Really!! :cen

sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken
indecision may or may not be my problem

Holy crap, lisbeth! What an incredibly presumptuous and RUDE thing of your colleague to say!

The people calling you spoiled are probably jealous of the fact that you have more disposable income than they have, and that you have the money and freedom to do things like travel because of being CF.

My response would be something "Of course I love money. It does make the world go round. Besides, what's wrong with being greedy? More money is a good thing." I would also say it jokingly so it takes him a while to realize he's being messed with.

"Cash rules everything around me."
~The Notorious B.I.G.

People can deny that until they are blue in the face with mindless slogans like "money cannot buy happiness" and "it's not about the material things". Bullshit. I don't know how happy you can be when bill collectors are constantly mailing and calling and you are about to get evicted. And we are material beings. You cannot eat love and "caring" don't pay the fucking bills. Enjoy your cash Lisbeth. They are just mad that you don't have to pay for camp and braces.

I just bought myself a puppet of a frog piloting a spaceship and now everything seems less shitty. Suck on that. It makes me happy.

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michaela

"A child will make two dishes at an entertainment for friends, and when the family dines alone, the fore or hind quarter will make a reasonable dish, and seasoned with a little pepper or salt, will be very good boiled on the fourth day, especially in winter." -Jonathan Swift, A Modest Proposal

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michaela
I just bought myself a puppet of a frog piloting a spaceship and now everything seems less shitty. Suck on that. It makes me happy.

Do you mind posting a pic of said puppet? Because that sounds like all kinds of awesome!!

wink

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toomanybrats

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michaela
I just bought myself a puppet of a frog piloting a spaceship and now everything seems less shitty. Suck on that. It makes me happy.

Do you mind posting a pic of said puppet? Because that sounds like all kinds of awesome!!

wink

From Amazon:


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michaela

"A child will make two dishes at an entertainment for friends, and when the family dines alone, the fore or hind quarter will make a reasonable dish, and seasoned with a little pepper or salt, will be very good boiled on the fourth day, especially in winter." -Jonathan Swift, A Modest Proposal

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michaela

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toomanybrats

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michaela
I just bought myself a puppet of a frog piloting a spaceship and now everything seems less shitty. Suck on that. It makes me happy.

Do you mind posting a pic of said puppet? Because that sounds like all kinds of awesome!!

wink

From Amazon:

41vHlu5y7mL.jpg

Cool!

I actually ended up saying something along the lines of, "well, if when you say I LOVE MONEY you mean I like to have money to buy food to eat and pay my bills, well then, yes, I love money." eyes2

Fuck camp and braces and COLLEGE TUITION! I like my car and my vacations!!

Speaking of vacations, I did have another gentleman who told me that I was "lucky" that I could afford to go on a vacation. This was a man nearing retirement age, so he has worked what? 40 years? He told me that he never ONCE in his entire working career took a vacation. I was like :eyebrows that is just 1) SAD and 2) SUCKS TO BE YOU. I mean, really? NEVER EVER went anywhere? It's not like he was a minimum wage slave or anything... he was probably just lying.

sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken
indecision may or may not be my problem

Quote
lisbeth
I have enjoyed the responses in this thread. Most of them seem to apply to me as well.

I recently decided to change jobs. The new job being a sort of hybrid between my old job and what I actually got my degree in. Also, they offered me a little more money and another week of vacation.

Sounds good, right? I know I'm taking a leap of faith here, since I had been at my old job for a while and am a Very Good Employee who Knows Her Stuff, according to well... everyone.

Anyway, during the last couple of weeks on the job there were a lot of different reactions I received from my fellow co-workers. Some people were angry, some sad, some were excited for me and congratulated me on getting the heck outta there! However.... this one prick decided he would loudly announce that the only reason I was leaving was because I am GREEDY and I LOVE MONEY.

Now, this is not even a person I deal with on a daily basis. I don't work directly for, near, or around this person and we have limited contact. I rarely exchange two words with him. I'm not sure what he thought he was accomplishing my walking around and loudly announcing that I was a GREEDY PERSON and WAS A LOVER OF MONEY.

cockbag sonsabitches!

Can't a person make a life choice for themself without people getting all weird about it? I've also had people tell me that I'm "spoiled" because... well.. I don't know. I bought a car? I took a vacation? Well fuckity fuck. I work. My husband works. We have no kids. Are we not allowed to enjoy the fruits of our labor? Grrrrrrrrrrrr. So glad I'm out of that place. Really!! :cen

When I went to leave Domino's to go to Showboat, the assistant manager threatened to call the casino and give them a bad report. He later apologized. I had some nasty bosses at Wendy's and Eckerd as well and one really nasty one at Camera Shop. If I had known then what I know now, I would have walked out right out.

My big one: moving to a place of my own. Yes, I want to do it. No, you mentioning it every day is not going to get it done faster.

My weight and what I eat.

The record collection. Every time we do something in the house, suddenly it's a problem and should be put in the basement. Not while I breathe.

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jessikitty
I have been questioned for not having sex in highschool and also periods of time in single adulthood. Funny enough, it was mostly men. They would call me a prude because I wasn't interested. Yeah I am a prude because I don't find you attractive or your personality rubs me the wrong way. Lol.

The bingos about sexuality always went hand and hand with me not being much of a party girl/drinker. I was considered lame or told I need to "learn to have fun/live alittle". My idea of fun doesn't include being hungover the next day. Don't get me wrong. I enjoy a drink here and there. I also don't have a problem with people who do drink more than me. They just seem to have a problem with me.

Most people didn't. High school was hell for me.

As for the not being a partier/drinker, I don't understand why people have such an issue with that. I've faced that bingo too in my life. Like you, I don't mind if somone likes to go out and party, just respect my right not to. I'm quite happy spending my evenings at home and if someone has a problem with that, it's their problem, not mine.

^^ I think I put something similar in mine. I never had fun going to parties. I have never had sex either; I'm seriously not considering having any sex until I am sterilized. The idea of ninja pregnancies scares me - like the thread in the Living Room a while back where the woman was seven months along - forget the horror flicks, that shit scares me.

There is one guy I am quite attracted to right now in the :sx sense. However, he's nearly twice my age (not that there's anything wrong with that; it's only a sixteen-year gap), so I leave it at doing this for the moment.

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michaela

"A child will make two dishes at an entertainment for friends, and when the family dines alone, the fore or hind quarter will make a reasonable dish, and seasoned with a little pepper or salt, will be very good boiled on the fourth day, especially in winter." -Jonathan Swift, A Modest Proposal

Yeah, I was never a partier or a drinker either - I'm still not. I went to a party (I guess you'd call it that) when I was a college freshman and I was just kind of sitting alone on the couch because I didn't really know anyone there. Some ass who was on the same floor was passing around a notebook and asking for all the women's phone numbers - I gave him the number to the local nut house. I just...I don't like being around large groups of people in social settings, even if it's people I know. I can handle maybe 3-4 people at once. As for drinking, I never liked the taste of alcohol - every kind I've ever had I didn't like at all.

I don't understand why some people honestly cannot understand this and might even try to change you. My old roomies did try to get me to party and drink, but they weren't persistent - if I said no, we left it at no. But if anyone ever pesters you to drink, here's a fun trick. Walk around with a drink (preferably in one of those red plastic party cups) and pretend to sip it, but don't actually drink anything. Or fill it with water and food coloring or something. This gives the impression of drinking and people won't bug you.

Stimulant-free, no cola, coffee,tea or chocolate
Milk-free, no milk ,ice crean, whipped cream. cheese and butter ok
Alcohol-free 12 years
Driving a minivan, no kids.Bought when we had 3 big dogs+2 cats, we lost 2 dogs since. Grrr Caravan
Not a partier. We never have people over.
Reading and crossword
I only wear long dresses and skirts, more comfy.
No makeup, real vanilla face.
We'd rather drive than fly. I spent 10 years working in metal tubes full of brats and assholes. Enough said.
I dote on my cats, who bring me more pleasure than sub-adult humans.
Stay at home wife:d'oh. Hubby earns enough.
The only job I'll ever do again is kennel attendant.I'd rather clean after animals than bipeds.
Phobia of vomit and pregnasty.