Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 18, 2020 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 3,753 |
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Cambion
Yeah good luck with your little plan, Moo. You quit buying or preparing your bipedal garbage disposal food and he's just going to scarf your shit instead, most likely with much complaining because you buy things he hates, but he "had to" eat it because he was "starving." I don't know why they think anything will change these bad habits. Maybe they should send their men to obedience schools to learn manners or something. Have Cesar Milan come over and pinch their ears when they act up.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 18, 2020 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 3,753 |
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Cambion
Moo is butthurt that her husband refuses to have more kids after the first (and only) one is a horrid pisspot and Duh will only get on board with making another brat if there is a guarantee that it won't be another little shit like the first one. Obviously there is no way to make that kind of a promise, so he says no while Moo wants 1-2 more.
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Cambion
Duh better keep his cock out of his heifer if he really doesn't want another potential demonspawn because I'm sure Moo will justify having another brat more and more and will oops him when she inevitably succumbs to baby rabies. Place your bets, place your bets! Other Moos chime in saying that their second brats were much easier than their first ones, tossing fuel on the pro-babby fire.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 19, 2020 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 10,106 |
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freya
I think it is great that he is communicating and stating he has changed his mind prior to another inpig. I suspect moo is hell-bent on another brat and will end up leaving him over this or winding up inpig "somehow" and cue imminent divorce.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 19, 2020 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 10,106 |
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I love my kids, truly. They mean everything and more to me. But I’d be lying if I said I don’t ever fantasize about life before them, and life without them.
I imagine what my husband and I would be doing if we never had kids. Traveling the world? Making a ton of money? Sleeping in? Living in a cool apartment, wherever we wanted? Having sex? Doing whatever the we wanted? When I think of it that way, I wonder why in the absolute fuck we ever wanted this life we chose, instead of THAT. My days consist of unloading the dishwasher, cleaning up food my toddler threw on the floor, loading the dishwasher, getting screamed at by the toddler, arguing with the older kid, making dinner, cleaning up after dinner, repeat, repeat, repeat. Why did we want this?
I know it’s normal for moms to get super burnt out and feel like this, but I feel so bad for my kids because I know these feelings are coming out in the way I act. I’m miserable, grumpy, anxious, irritable, always annoyed. I remember my mom acting that way toward me as a kid and it really fucked me up. And here I am, doing the same shit I vowed to never do.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 19, 2020 | Registered: 8 years ago Posts: 361 |
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 19, 2020 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 3,753 |
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Cambion
I don't feel sorry for them at all because it is absolutely no secret that kids suck and the belief that their experience will magically be better than every other parent's is narrow-minded and naive. Maybe if they enter into parenthood assuming it will be the worst experience of their lives, it'll seem slightly less shitty because they'll be sort of braced for it instead of expecting unicorn taints and bunny farts and experiencing crippling disappointment and depression when reality sets in.
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Cambion
Having kids is never better than not having them, at least not from what I've seen/heard/read. And then you get morons like this who grew up being raised by parents who were miserable because of their existence and STILL didn't make the connection that brats = unhappy.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 19, 2020 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,251 |
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And that your parenting experience would be different from everyone else you know who was miserable and exhausted trying to raise their brats.
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But if you have a brat, you are stuck with it for a minimum of 18 years. You've given away the choice to avoid misery. If the brat causes misery your only option is to beg someone else to watch it for a few hours or hoist it off onto the one person in your life that you chose a life with.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 19, 2020 | Registered: 10 years ago Posts: 2,445 |
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I love my kids, truly. They mean everything and more to me.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 21, 2020 | Registered: 4 years ago Posts: 202 |
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If y'all don't know, she was a kick ass fiction writer who wrote 'the lottery' and the story that was the basis for the 'haunting of hill house' and many other tales of fiction that really managed to cross the line from silly to creepy and disturbing AF. Her stories have many themes about society and wealth and being 'trapped' in a situation of despair, without escape.
I just heard an interview with Shirley Jackson's son, because some of her short stories were recently discovered and published. He mentioned how she found 4-5 hours per day to write, with 5 kids at home and a husband who worked but didn't drive, so it was all on her. When the interviewer asked a question about whether the theme of being 'trapped' reflected how his mother felt stifled and oppressed by motherhood and gender expectations...he didn't really 'get' it. At all. His answer to the interviewer missed the mark completely.
And here's the thing. Nowadays, we'd be considered 'neglectful' or 'absent' or 'withdrawn' or 'emotionally unavailable' or whatever you'd call 'doing something other than being an involved parent', especially since she didn't have a 'real job' outside of the house. But her kid didn't even have an inkling, all these years later, as a grown-ass man, that his mom was internally tormented by the confinement of motherhood and societal expectations. He really came across as how proud he was that she was such an amazing writer (he, also, is a writer/editor).
Parents have such immense pressure to be 'everything' to their kids, and it's only recently that this has become the expectation. And it could turn out that benign neglect is actually a GOOD thing in the long run, because our kids only notice the big things. So...you have permission to relax Especially in this holiday break when most of us will feel pressured to do 'holiday activities' and 'traditions' and all that jazz...but we're mostly still trying to work AND not having to battle about school...it's ok to let your kids be, hole up in your room with some secret candy and popcorn, and watch those hallmark Xmas movies. Your kids will be fine.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 21, 2020 | Registered: 4 years ago Posts: 202 |
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 21, 2020 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,251 |
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It seems like Reddit moo is on the verge of realizing what a fiasco modern parenting is, but maybe doesn't think it's acceptable to use "antiquated" methods and is looking for permission to deviate from the herd.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 22, 2020 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 10,106 |
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I left some frozen chicken breast out on the counter to defrost for dinner. You put it back in the fridge because you "just trying to clean up."
I put some old sheets in a vac bag on the porch for someone to pickup through our neighborhood freebox. You brought them back in because "whY WoULd tHeRe bE ShEetS oN tHe pOrCH???" Person cannot pick them up because they are missing.
Our babysitter was collecting old water bottles for an art project with our daughter - leaving them in a small out of the way corner on our kitchen counter. Despite being told multiple times that they were being collected, you threw them away because you were trying to get the recycling ready.
I purchased green and red storage bins for our new Christmas decorations so that I would be able to easily store and find them next year (we just moved so this is the first year we have any outdoor decorations). You felt an overwhelming urge to organize our utility room and didn't bother to think, "why are there several brand new CHRISTMAS COLORED STORAGE BINS just sitting in our garage." Instead you expected a standing ovation and award because you randomly decided to organize something without any planning and used all of the bins I already had a plan for.
I'm sick of having to do things twice or be inconvenienced because you "are just trying to help" and "why can't I just be happy that I have a helpful husband." BECAUSE IT IS NOT FUCKING HELPFUL WHEN AS A RESULT OF YOUR "HELP," I TO HAVE TO GO TO THE STORE TWICE, REARRANGE DINNER PLANS, ASK SOMEONE TO MAKE TWO TRIPS TO OUR HOUSE, etc.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 23, 2020 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 10,106 |
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So tired of hearing this with the subtle message that living the traditional life is bad. Like that’s fantastic that you chose to ‘forge your own path,’ but please don’t make it sound like having kids and being in a marriage is the worst thing ever. Some of us need the structure that having a family brings. Like yeah, sometimes I wonder what it would have been like if I stayed single and didn’t get pregnant and got to take on jobs In other countries but I KNOW I need my family that I have now, and that’s more important to me.
Ranting here because I know most of Reddit would chew my head off for suggesting that there’s more than one way to live.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 23, 2020 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,251 |
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 23, 2020 | Registered: 4 years ago Posts: 202 |
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Cambion
Bingo central too - CF people are all just dumb edgy teenagers, I used to hate kids until I had one, pet owners are not "moms," my life was empty and meaningless until I had a brat, CFers are just mad that no one will marry/fuck us and we're projecting, etc.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 23, 2020 | Registered: 14 years ago Posts: 12,454 |
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Cambion
Moo bitching about how her husband "helping" is not helpful at all. You know what I see a distinct lack of in her story? Communication. At any point did she tell her husband why any of that stuff was where it was? Or did she just kind of expect him to read her mind? Maybe some things are self-explanatory, but Moos are also stupid at times ("mommy brain" is the excuse they use) and do shit that makes no sense.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 23, 2020 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 3,753 |
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toraneko
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Cambion
Bingo central too - CF people are all just dumb edgy teenagers, I used to hate kids until I had one, pet owners are not "moms," my life was empty and meaningless until I had a brat, CFers are just mad that no one will marry/fuck us and we're projecting, etc.
Hah. If we're all so wrong, why are there so many regret posts about not wanting brats but making them anyway and hating every minute of it?
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sourpuss moo
My child literally made my life better, lol. People who say these things are still kids themselves.
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Same sourpuss moo
I kinda feel that way sometimes but I know deep down I would love a stable, healthy marriage, a safe home and more children. Currently in a bad 10 year relationship (not married) in a shitty environment with a toddler. I try really hard to make things homey for her sake and mine, but its just not there. I've lost my faith in the family structure I think because I haven't really been with a man that wasn't horrible/emotionally unstable. But that's MY issue. Not an issue of marriage.
I seriously do want that family structure. I'm begrudgingly one and done and nearing an age where having more children would be undesirable. Ugh. I appreciate your rant!
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 23, 2020 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 10,106 |
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I'm still waiting on a call back from legal aid concerning filing for divorce. I am 100% dependent on my husband. There are other posts about him.
Tonight he wanted to visit his mother. We went over and I had to remind him that his daughter needs to be fed dinner. She doesn't have anything in her house that she can eat for a meal. It's all junk food for the older grandkids. It's after 7 when she finally sits down to eat something for dinner. Her bed time is 7:30. She's been fed an orange, some chips, some french fries, and a cracker or two by grandma because she was HUNGRY.
She was also getting TIRED. And the older grandkids were DISTRACTING. She wanted to be a "big kid" and sit on the chairs with them while they ate but she doesn't know how and can't manage the emotional regulation and manners the older kids have. She's barely a toddler.
So a 36 year old man took it upon himself to strap her into a highchair and shove food she did not want at her face. She signed she was done. She even kept making the noise for DONE. She started to cry because she wasn't being allowed to be with her cousins while they ate.
This made him angry. He whipped the chair around so she couldn't see them. If she hadn't been strapped in she would have gone flying. I told him to stop, be careful with her and he turned his anger on me for daring to question him. She was screaming and sobbing.
He then whipped her around in the chair to drag the chair into the kitchen where she wouldn't have distractions. This probably would have worked from the start but she didn't want to eat and he was shoving food in her mouth as she cried and telling her to stop being rude and throwing it on the floor.
I didn't know what to do. My first thought was to just go in there, grab her, and leave his ass with his mother. But fear stopped me. Fear that it would make it worse in BOTH of us if I stood up and took her away.
Tonight, while my baby screamed and cried for 30 minutes while a 36 year old man taunted her with "are you hurt? No you're not so stop crying!" I realized I'm afraid to make any move against him. I'm afraid of what he'll do and how he'll go about it.
Tonight I kept telling myself that I need to just let it be because he is not physically hurting her and that once he's done emotionally tormenting her we will go home and I'll but her in bed with me where she is safe and we won't have to look at him again until the next evening. And tomorrow I'm calling a shelter. I might have a jar of pennies to my name, but the terror of sitting there realizing I was scared to help her has really shaken me to my core.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 23, 2020 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 10,106 |
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I think my MIL and my mothers generation have no idea.
They got help from their parents to look after their children (in my MIL case, her mother actually raised my husband).
How come I’ve not had a single second of aid? I’m not even exaggerating. Not a single second where my MIL has watched my son for me. Even though she literally lives under the same damn roof!!! It would take her all but 5 seconds to walk up the stairs and ask if I needed some help.
If I’m ill, oh well, no choice but to suck it up and suffer through it whilst simultaneously looking after my son.
If I have an interview, my son has to go into a (very expensive) daycare facility for the day, and that comes with the added stressors of getting his things ready for said daycare.
If I have a doctors appointment, my son joins.
If I have to go to a crowded city hall to fill out paperwork for hours on end, my son joins.
No one even offers to help. And I don’t even have anyone to go to for advice, or recipes, or anecdotes. Because neither MIL or my mother really truly raised any children.
My husband and I were so lucky to have amazingly selfless grandparents, who have unfortunately passed on! I’m sure they would be full of wisdom and knowledge, and 100% ready to help out at the drop of a hat!
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 23, 2020 | Registered: 9 years ago Posts: 3,753 |
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 24, 2020 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 10,106 |
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Just asked me if getting me underwear for Christmas was a good gift.
Like, with a serious face. He honestly thought getting me panties (which I don't really need at the moment) was a good idea.
No. Just. No. Put some thought into it man!
Just to be clear, I'm not complaining about the fact that he wants to get me panties (because knowing him, they will be the worst kind for every day wear), but just the fact that he literally does not put any real thought into it. If someone needs underwear (or socks or any daily wear item like that), then, I get it. But I don't, he knows that, but still.
I just want, for one year, for him to put some THOUGHT into a gift. I haven't had a gift under the tree since we've been married. Every year, I make sure to take the kids out to pick a gift or two for him. And every year, I just get a "You picked a great gift out! Sorry I didn't get you anything. I forgot."
I've been bugging him since December 1 to take the kids out to go do their own shopping. They're 8 and 11 and are literally BEGGING him to take them so they can pick out something for me.
I don't know that it's going to happen.
I'm preparing myself to be not be surprised if there's nothing there and not be outwardly disappointed.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 24, 2020 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,251 |
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 25, 2020 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 10,106 |
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 25, 2020 | Registered: 19 years ago Posts: 9,251 |
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Husband told me he was giving me a divorce for Christmas because I stood up for myself and called him out on blatant disrespect.
Last night husband kept making "positive" comments about my weight. "You've lost weight!" This isn't positive. He never pays attention to whats going on with us, but if he did he'd know I'm not eating from stress and anxiety and trying to keep as much food in the house for my daughter since he keeps blowing his paychecks on stuff for OTHER people. I counted pennies to go buy bread and peanut butter for her. I also do not enjoy men talking about my weight, regardless of how "nice" they are about it. There are thousands of things I do, have achieved, or am as a person to compliment me on. My thighs looking thinner isn't appreciated. He also has made it a point to neg me about anything to do with who I am and what I do so that all his "compliments" that are always about my body are unwelcome.
He started to grab my body. Pinching my fat rolls and commenting on how they are smaller. Gross. Not complimentary.
Then he started making "jokes" about the summer sausage I was wrapping as gifts for family is or isn't dildos depending on if it was going to a man or woman. We were at his moms house so I didn't say a word.
When his mom leaves the room, he asks me "Do you still want a divorce?" I didn't answer. I just laughed and pointed out he's the one who brought it up.
After that comment, he tells me he was thinking if buying me a vibrator for Christmas. Any other HEALTHY relationship, this would probably be fine. But he's shamed me for taking care of myself instead of just having sex with him (as in he got mad, but he also doesn't care if I get off). I know for a fact if he did get me something like this, he'd immediately tell me to use it in front of him and make me feel gross about all of it. He'd also take it from me as "punishment" for making him mad that I won't have sex with him.
This morning he again constantly sexualized anything I did. I was singing with my 1.5 year old daughter and dancing along with a Dora song and he MOANED and stared right at my chest and told me to stand up and dance for him. I felt so disgusted that I can't even enjoy a moment with my daughter being silly and making her giggle. I'm supposed to put on a performance for him while he watches my tits shake. He could have just watched me and been quiet about it instead, and then just mentioned how he enjoyed watching me LATER. That's what a normal, healthy relationship would be like.
So because I told him no to dancing and he demanded to know WHY and I refused to justify my very clear NO, he's decided to "punish" me. He immediately checked out on spending time with her, got himself dressed real nice, and hid his phone because that's not suspicious. His mother stopped by so I pieced together they were having lunch. When I asked him if he was going somewhere with his mom, he lied. To my face.
His mother called him to confirm their lunch plans, and he tried to skip out the door alone until she told him "Bring the baby and give K some time alone." That pissed him off. There's nothing more disappointing for him than having someone else point out he should parent his kid instead of leaving her with me constantly.
I tried to kiss her goodbye as they walked toward the door and he shoved past me, picked her up, and walked out the door.
I took a hot shower without an audience, have cleaned up the living room and rotated her toys, have been blaring music and singing along, and had another cup of coffee while I sat here.
I'm still waiting for a call back from the legal aid group for my state and will be filing for custody, child support, spousal support and going to ask the judge to make him pay a majority of the medical bills I've incurred that he's refused to pay while also refusing to let me work so I can pay my bills.
I just have to survive however long this will take while dodging sexual harassment and week long pity parties because I won't touch his peepee
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Moo Justification
He could have just watched me and been quiet about it instead, and then just mentioned how he enjoyed watching me LATER. That's what a normal, healthy relationship would be like.
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There is nothing to sell. The phone I'm on is from 2016. My laptop was thrown at a wall because I was looking for work. My ring was taken off my hand and thrown in a corn field Easter 2019 over a cake I didn't make for him.
Both cars are in his name. The 60 inch tv is obvious. He has several gadgets including a brand new iphone he constantly uses. There are no gaming consoles or games. If I bake things to sell he demands I spend my money on food and I have to so she can eat. If I clean some houses he knows because I can't take her with me. He counts the milage on my car by taking pictures and questions who I was fucking when I went 5.6 miles that day.
Its insane. There is no option to squirrel money.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices December 27, 2020 | Registered: 18 years ago Posts: 10,106 |
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Hi, just here to rant cause I'm beyond pissed off but don't feel like it's reasonable to voice any of it to my husband. It's just going to start a fight, and it's not one worth having. I'm an angry person so I turn to you to vent instead.
I get to sleep in 1 day a week - Sunday - until 10 am. Husband gets Saturdays. I fucking love this day, because it's the one day where I don't have to share my god damn bagel with my 18 month old. I can relax and drink my coffee and be rested enough to actually enjoy my son's nap time, which is 11 am. We have had this schedule since he was 1 year old.
So my husband gets up with our son this morning as usual. When I come downstairs, kiddo is kind of asleep on my husband's shoulder, but sees me and perks up and starts crying blah blah. Long story short my husband was like "oh he was so clingy and I was tired and I just wanted a break and he already watched an hour of TV", so he fucking rocked him on his shoulder and let him fall asleep for 5 minutes! So when nap time comes at 11 am, kiddo DOESN'T FUCKING GO TO BED LIKE NORMAL. He screams, bounces, etc. for an hour. I go in and try to rock him to sleep for 40 minutes, doesn't work. My husband has the gall to say "well, I guess we both made mistakes, mine was letting him sleep on me and yours was rocking him, because now he's more riled up than before". Bitch I was trying to fix the mistake YOU MADE.
Our son is not sleeping. I fucking gave up and brought him out of the room. I am so pissed off that I am missing out on my 60-90 minutes of peace and quiet during the nap. During the week when I'm the SAHM, I do chores during his nap. Only on the weekends do I get to enjoy this time, and this is the one god damn day where I am well rested and get to slowly eat my breakfast and just... rest and enjoy myself. And I don't fucking get it today because my husband is incompetent. And I feel like I can't even fucking leave my husband to tend our son cause then this shit happens and the whole day is fucked. It was only 3.5 hours, that's all it fucking took, is it so fucking hard??? I don't even know what we're going to do now, and my stupid ass husband is looking to me for answers. Oh, do we nap him? Do we push him to bed time? I don't fucking know! Why do I have to figure it out??? Fuck sake.