Just plain hate.

I just want to hate on the word "trauma" for a minute. I wish it could be banned from the English language.

The word is so overused, particularly by 20-somethings. Jeebus, the snowflakes over on Reddit, most of whom are generation I don't know what. (I'd say most everyone under the age of 30.)

Just take a look at most of Reddit, and this age group is rife with people who have "trauma" and "PTSD." They cannot possibly be expected to work or support themselves or move out of their parent' houses because TRAUMA.

I feel for people who have experienced genuinely traumatic events and are being lumped in with these people who can barely function.

And "trauma' is now an excuse for every-fucking-thing. And don't even get me started on "triggered."

Look at what I just saw on Facebook, on a group for people with diabetes. A woman prefaced her post with this:

"I ask that you not use that hug emoji to respond. I know that all of you care but I that emoji just triggers ill feelings for me and makes me feel like bad about navigating having this whole disease."

What kind of fucking snowflake gets TRIGGERED by a fucking emoji?

One chick over on Reddit (23) was dating a guy and she just found out he's like 41. He lied and told her he was 30. She dated him for a grand total of two months. She referred to this entire experience as a "trauma inducting event" for her. When people told her, count your blessings, learning experience, and be glad you found out early, she kept replying that she had talked to him prior to dating, so it was as if she knew him for additional time, therefore it was more traumatic for her.

She wrote a long paragraph that the guy was really a "sincerely nice guy" and appeared to be justifying the relationship. He has "trauma" from his previous relationship and therefore felt the need to lie.

Do people really buy this shit? What a gullible and dumb broad.

All these people need to grow the fuck up.

--Yeah, I'm a Boomer, but there is something to be said for time and place and decorum and functioning in society and nobody gives a shit (nor should they) about your fee-fees. Do your damn job and have some consideration for others. Nobody wants to be burdened by your problems and have to treat you with kid gloves.

I knew someone like this a while ago before it was trendy to say everything was traumatic/triggering. This dude was a pathological liar at the very least - like how he said he got stabbed in the shoulder with a knife during a home invasion and a week later there wasn't so much as chafed skin in the affected spot because "I heal fast."

But I swear to god, if I said ANYTHING, there was about a 25 percent chance that he'd get upset over it because it "brought back bad memories from high school." The most out there random shit would somehow re-traumatize him because it allegedly reminded him of a bad experience in high school. It was exhausting being around him because you never knew what would send him into a downward spiral. I don't think there were actually bad memories from high school - I think he just liked the attention he got from being cheered up. I remember once he had some unfolded laundry out and I said I liked the pattern on some swimming trunks - it was skeletons or something. Immediate sadness because his alleged dead girlfriend got him those in high school and it made him sad to be reminded of her. Not sad enough to get rid of the trunks, but me pointing out their existence was what upset him.

---

But yes, the weight behind words like "trauma" and "PTSD" has completely disappeared because of a bunch of whiny snowflakes who think it's actually traumatic when something doesn't go exactly their way. I remember seeing something online (probably Reddit) about a woman complaining that her influencer 20-something daughter that lived with her would constantly shame her online and any time the mother did anything the daughter didn't agree with, the daughter would save the experience in her "trauma bank" to whine about to her followers later in order to paint the mother as abusive. So some of these dumbfucks will weaponize their so-called trauma.

True trauma and PTSD come from genuinely traumatic experiences. They are not the result of things not going your way and causing a minor inconvenience. If these people genuinely have PTSD, why don't they take medication for it? Why don't they go to therapy? Surely if it's bad enough to hinder their ability to function as normal human beings because everything sets them off, they would seek treatment. If you get triggered by shit like emojis, you need to be in a padded room, not on the internet.

This entire forum is proof positive that the average CF person is way smarter than the average Breeder. All you have to do is look at the spelling, punctuation and grammar of our posts.

I am glad we have this forum because the rest of the internet (particularly FaceBooger) makes me nuts.

Call me an elitist snob, but it grates the Hell out of me to read posts from illiterate people. I usually discount whatever it is they are trying to say. Spell check is everywhere now and it's just people being lazy.

I just read something where a guy wrote that he bought a property that used to belong to his family so he could bring it back to the "sir name." And his sprogs found the "illusive" family graveyard. I'm a member of a diabetic group and a woman just posted something where she consistently used the term "blood surgar." JFC, cannot even spell "sugar" correctly?

And then there are people who write U R for "you are" and ur for "yours." Ugh.

I have PTSD. My crazy drunken landlord broke into my apartment while I was sleeping and threatened to kill me.

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bell_flower
This entire forum is proof positive that the average CF person is way smarter than the average Breeder. All you have to do is look at the spelling, punctuation and grammar of our posts.

I am glad we have this forum because the rest of the internet (particularly FaceBooger) makes me nuts.

Call me an elitist snob, but it grates the Hell out of me to read posts from illiterate people. I usually discount whatever it is they are trying to say. Spell check is everywhere now and it's just people being lazy.

I just read something where a guy wrote that he bought a property that used to belong to his family so he could bring it back to the "sir name." And his sprogs found the "illusive" family graveyard. I'm a member of a diabetic group and a woman just posted something where she consistently used the term "blood surgar." JFC, cannot even spell "sugar" correctly?

And then there are people who write U R for "you are" and ur for "yours." Ugh.

I'm particularly annoyed by misuse of homonyms. On a public board there's a 50-50 chance that someone would write "it greats the hell out of me."

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bell_flower
Call me an elitist snob, but it grates the Hell out of me to read posts from illiterate people. I usually discount whatever it is they are trying to say. Spell check is everywhere now and it's just people being lazy.

It drives me nuts too, but it's because I like to write sometimes as a hobby and have also written for money. I'm a stickler for grammar and I have to assume anyone who can't be arsed to use some simple/basic punctuation is lazy. Outside of maybe like chatting on Discord, I don't expect people to be grammatically correct there. I will also be forgiving of folks whose first language is not English. Haha, I know I make typos here and there, so I probably have no room to talk.

The stuff that made my teeth itch were people in high school who would ~*~WrItE tHeIr PrOfIlEs LiKe ThIs~*~ That takes longer to type than normal typing!

For further amusement and people's butchering of the English language, see old.reddit.com/r/BoneAppleTeeth.

And in fairness, spell check doesn't catch everything. Like an ad my paper printed last year slipped by us and said that all the proceeds from some event being held would benefit the local food panty. Oops!

I might have to do the same thing. A lot of pants are super tricky on me because I'm really short waisted and have longer legs. I was so happy when high-rise jeans came back in style because nothing was fitting me for the longest time.

I'll have to see who's local and just get a pile of jeans and have them done. I'm so tired of trying to find something that fits and looks flattering, and I don't think my body shape is even that unusual. Oh well.

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I have PTSD. My crazy drunken landlord broke into my apartment while I was sleeping and threatened to kill me.

That would do it. I had it from living with my stepfather who sexually abused me while my sainted mother Stood By Her Man.^TM

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yurble

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bell_flower
This entire forum is proof positive that the average CF person is way smarter than the average Breeder. All you have to do is look at the spelling, punctuation and grammar of our posts.

I am glad we have this forum because the rest of the internet (particularly FaceBooger) makes me nuts.

Call me an elitist snob, but it grates the Hell out of me to read posts from illiterate people. I usually discount whatever it is they are trying to say. Spell check is everywhere now and it's just people being lazy.

I just read something where a guy wrote that he bought a property that used to belong to his family so he could bring it back to the "sir name." And his sprogs found the "illusive" family graveyard. I'm a member of a diabetic group and a woman just posted something where she consistently used the term "blood surgar." JFC, cannot even spell "sugar" correctly?

And then there are people who write U R for "you are" and ur for "yours." Ugh.

I'm particularly annoyed by misuse of homonyms. On a public board there's a 50-50 chance that someone would write "it greats the hell out of me."

and than then blame it on the ought to correct or the spill chicker spell checker.

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“There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man.”

No my name isn't Karen but I'm starting to get sick of hearing it being overused. I also feel kind of bad for anyone named Karen. It was kind of funny in the beginning (soccer moo with expensive, ugly blonde bob mistreating employees and demanding to speak to the manager) but now it's being used for all shitty behavior. I don't know. It's just not fucking funny anymore.

It used to be a label for over the top, inappropriate behavior, but now it’s being used as a way to belittle women who stand up for themselves. Any white woman who makes a complaint is automatically dismissed as being a Karen, even if the complaint is valid and she’s not being a jerk about it.

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"Not every ejaculation deserves a name" - George Carlin

I agree, speaking on the 'net and in real life, a whole other language is being used, and now accepted.

I think I might have told a story of once a few summers ago, we were outside on a bar patio. We go with the dog, its usually pretty dead during the day even in nice weather, no music on or anything. One time tho, 2 couples of adults, I don't know, between 25-35 sat by us. When my husband would go inside to go to the bathroom,I'm sitting there alone and I couldn't help but hear everything they were saying to each other, as the tables were less than maybe 3-4 feet from me. The girls must have used the word "anxiety" 3 times every 20 mins or so. Everything is sharing the anxiety they feel over this that and the other. This is when I realized, like "trauma", they use "anxiety" instead of "I felt nervous starting a new job" "I was stressing while packing to move" Everything is "anxiety" and brings a complicated thought that needs sympathy. You can't tell people to 'chill' if they use anxiety, but you can if they say lesser words.

I do notice on Reddit CF, most those (usually) women are in their 30s per what they say. Dismissively complain about Boomer parents, not understanding....their problems. They will literally say, "you know, they are like just figure it out" I honestly don't understand what their generation of parents got them ready for, or didn't, because they seem to be drowning in normal stuff people go thru and are mad because they aren't getting MORE support out of parents. I guess the parents want them to learn by themselves *some* time! I'm telling you, I bothered my parents for absolutely nothing in my 30s, and long before that....nothing! Besides, if the parents tell them anything they don't want to hear, they will just complain about that too.

I agree, speaking on the 'net and in real life, a whole other language is being used, and now accepted.

I think I might have told a story of once a few summers ago, we were outside on a bar patio. We go with the dog, its usually pretty dead during the day even in nice weather, no music on or anything. One time tho, 2 couples of adults, I don't know, between 25-35 sat by us. When my husband would go inside to go to the bathroom, I'm sitting there alone and I couldn't help but hear everything they were saying to each other, as the tables were less than maybe 3-4 feet from me. The girls must have used the word "anxiety" 3 times every 20 mins or so. Everything is sharing the anxiety they feel over this that and the other. This is when I realized, like "trauma", they use "anxiety" instead of "I felt nervous starting a new job" "I was stressing while packing to move" Everything is "anxiety" and brings a complicated thought that needs sympathy. You can't tell people to 'chill' if they use anxiety, but you can if they say lesser words.

I do notice on Reddit CF, most those (usually) women are in their 30s per what they say. Dismissively complain about Boomer parents, not understanding....their problems. They will literally say, "you know, they are like just figure it out" I honestly don't understand what their generation of parents got them ready for, or didn't, because they seem to be drowning in normal stuff people go thru and are mad because they aren't getting MORE support out of parents. I guess the parents want them to learn by themselves *some* time! I'm telling you, I bothered my parents for absolutely nothing in my 30s, and long before that....nothing! Besides, if the parents tell them anything they don't want to hear, they will just complain about that too.

"Anxiety" and "Trauma" are definitely overused. It waters it down for people with an actual diagnosis. Everyone can feel anxious or nervous at times, but those terms are so overused that it waters the meaning down to nothing.

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cfuter
I do notice on Reddit CF, most those (usually) women are in their 30s per what they say. Dismissively complain about Boomer parents, not understanding....their problems. They will literally say, "you know, they are like just figure it out" I honestly don't understand what their generation of parents got them ready for, or didn't, because they seem to be drowning in normal stuff people go thru and are mad because they aren't getting MORE support out of parents. I guess the parents want them to learn by themselves *some* time! I'm telling you, I bothered my parents for absolutely nothing in my 30s, and long before that....nothing! Besides, if the parents tell them anything they don't want to hear, they will just complain about that too.

That's probably because boomer advice amounts to "pull yourself up by your bootstraps" and "you wouldn't be so poor if you just stopped eating avocado toast." My mother is a boomer and she didn't teach me shit because she felt that the only thing that mattered in life was grades, to the point she did my homework for me until I was 15 and then somehow expected me to excel in college I didn't want to attend in the first place. I was never taught how to do laundry, wash dishes, budget money, balance a checkbook, cook, clean, drive, nothing. I figured out how to do all this shit over time, but I know not everyone manages to do that and now we have a huge crop of helpless 20-30-somethings who will become helpless middle aged adults because their boomer parents couldn't be arsed to be parents.

I still kind of hate her for leaving me woefully unprepared for life. A parent's job is to raise their kids to be independent adults. I know some of my generation is just a bunch of whiny assholes who want to be told how special they are and given a cookie every time they do something right. But plenty of them also had inept parents who failed at their jobs. My mother's method of teaching me anything was to tell me I have no common sense any time I did something wrong, even if I was like five years old. But also never showed me the right way to do things while also preventing me from trying to figure things out on my own so I wouldn't fail, gain independence or make trouble. I'm still shocked I managed to not be one of these emotionally crippled millennials that considers every trivial inconvenience traumatic.

And a separate hate - please forgive my serial posting.

Fuck landlords who don't allow pets.

I know, I'm sure they have their reasons. Probably issues with past tenants who let their neglected animals urinate and defecate all over the apartment, which would likely result in damage with costs that exceed any security deposit. Maybe allergies, or they're just not animal lovers.

But it doesn't make it suck any less. In my area, NOBODY allows pets in rental properties. Every single classified ad for apartments for rent specifies no pets. So in order to be a pet owner in my area, you have to be able to afford a house. I think the only places that sometimes allow pets are section 8 housing. Because that's what people who are living off other people's money need: more dependents.

It burns my ass that people are allowed to have kids in apartments, but not pets. I know pets can cause damage, but a child is so, so much more destructive than any dog or cat. You show me a dog that will scribble on the walls with a Sharpie, or a cat that will flush the entire contents of a sock drawer down the toilet because "the toilet was hungry, Mommy!"

This is why I'd never consider renting again. I would sooner be homeless than give my furry and feathered family members away. It's a shame too, because when I rented previously (last place allowed me to have my birds at least) I was clean, quiet, no noise complaints, and lived there for almost a decade never late on the rent.

There were a lot of issues with breeders though. Their kids would scream, make messes in the hallway, there were audible fights between babymomma and babydaddee, domestic violence, kids committing vandalism, you name it.

Nowadays at least where I live, the rent is almost as high as a mortgage so it blows if you have to do that. I'd rather deal with the issues of my little old house than go back to renting again.

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Cambion

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cfuter
I do notice on Reddit CF, most those (usually) women are in their 30s per what they say. Dismissively complain about Boomer parents, not understanding....their problems. They will literally say, "you know, they are like just figure it out" I honestly don't understand what their generation of parents got them ready for, or didn't, because they seem to be drowning in normal stuff people go thru and are mad because they aren't getting MORE support out of parents. I guess the parents want them to learn by themselves *some* time! I'm telling you, I bothered my parents for absolutely nothing in my 30s, and long before that....nothing! Besides, if the parents tell them anything they don't want to hear, they will just complain about that too.

That's probably because boomer advice amounts to "pull yourself up by your bootstraps" and "you wouldn't be so poor if you just stopped eating avocado toast." My mother is a boomer and she didn't teach me shit because she felt that the only thing that mattered in life was grades, to the point she did my homework for me until I was 15 and then somehow expected me to excel in college I didn't want to attend in the first place. I was never taught how to do laundry, wash dishes, budget money, balance a checkbook, cook, clean, drive, nothing. I figured out how to do all this shit over time, but I know not everyone manages to do that and now we have a huge crop of helpless 20-30-somethings who will become helpless middle aged adults because their boomer parents couldn't be arsed to be parents.

I still kind of hate her for leaving me woefully unprepared for life. A parent's job is to raise their kids to be independent adults. I know some of my generation is just a bunch of whiny assholes who want to be told how special they are and given a cookie every time they do something right. But plenty of them also had inept parents who failed at their jobs. My mother's method of teaching me anything was to tell me I have no common sense any time I did something wrong, even if I was like five years old. But also never showed me the right way to do things while also preventing me from trying to figure things out on my own so I wouldn't fail, gain independence or make trouble. I'm still shocked I managed to not be one of these emotionally crippled millennials that considers every trivial inconvenience traumatic.

I agree with you Cambion. The same thing happened to me. I wasn't even allowed to bathe myself even after I started my period because my moo had to make sure I was "clean". These Boomer parents are absolutely insane and I have little sympathy when their adult kids worry them to death because they made their bed.

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"I have found little that is 'good' about human beings on the whole. In my experience most of them are trash, no matter whether they publicly subscribe to this or that ethical doctrine or to none at all."
~Sigmund Freud

I'm pretty sure landlords would ban kids if they could, they just aren't legally allowed to.

Of course the real problem is there are horrible irresponsible renters out there, and there are horrible slumlord landlords, too. Both sides have to beware. I really hope to avoid ever having to be a landlord or a tenant again in my life, because it's a huge financial risk to take on, if the person turns out to be malicious.

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peace-n-quiet
I agree with you Cambion. The same thing happened to me. I wasn't even allowed to bathe myself even after I started my period because my moo had to make sure I was "clean". These Boomer parents are absolutely insane and I have little sympathy when their adult kids worry them to death because they made their bed.

I'm right there with you on that one. My maternal unit failed in every aspect of teaching me hygiene too. I was bathed until I was like 12 years old, and since I lived with my paranoid grandma as well, I couldn't bathe on my own without her knocking on the door every two minutes to ensure I didn't drown. I don't know why because not only could I not drown in two inches of water, Grandma drove me to swimming lessons as a kid!

My mother never taught me about shaving, just said my legs were hairy and I needed to shave. Had to learn that on my own, so my first attempt at shaving was me doing so with a dry disposable razor. That... was not fun. Nobody told me I needed deodorant either - I think it was my aunts who told my mother I stink and need deodorant. Nobody ever warned me that I would start bleeding out my vagina once a month and when it happened, I thought I was dying. All my mother did was tell me there were pads under the sink. Not what they look like or how to use them, and I fucking hated them because they gave me something akin to diaper rash. My aunts also had to be the ones to tell her I needed a bra, but she never had me try one on to determine my size. She just picked a size and had me wear it. I thought it was normal for bras to ride up and slide up off my boobs, but it turned out the bra was too small.

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yurble
I'm pretty sure landlords would ban kids if they could, they just aren't legally allowed to.

They used to do that. I found an old newspaper in my desk at home from like 1986 or 1987 and read it. In the classifieds section, every single room for rent said "no kids." But now it's considered discrimination. I think that's bullshit - kids are a lifestyle choice, and if landlords can say "no smoking" and "no pets" (both also lifestyle choices), then they should be allowed to say "no kids" too. I'm not trying to rent now or anything, but just something I've noticed when looking at the paper. Nobody will rent to a pet owner around here.

My moo did the same thing with me about when I started my period. I was really late when it started (I was 15) and when it happened for the first time and I told her, she just yelled at me saying, "It's no big deal!" and that we had pads in the bathroom. I was in so much pain from cramping but she didn't GAF.

My mother didn't bathe me but she didn't teach me anything about how to look after myself. I had to learn it all on my own. She just didn't want to be bothered helping her burden learn the basics of life.

More about these reddit postings, youre right, it doesnt matter what sub youre on, if people are looking for advice or sympathy, every single one of them has some condition, therefore they need (whatever they are whining about here). Mom took teens phone away overnights, but teen needs it for her music to sleep becuz she has whatever kind of ADD/ADHD so specific that I never heard of it. Not saying she's lying, but every single post will claim some kind of condition or ailment. How can everyone in the population have a condition or sickness now that separates them from everyone else? After awhile it seems like an excuse so there will be no viable solution that can be suggested other than exactly what they want it to be. Again, this is a generation that (generally) had so much more support, yet has so many nervous problems even with the support.

That being said, I really should stay off social media becuz after reading about all this anxiety, it is giving me my first inklings of anxiety, not nervousness or stress, but feeling anxious from the inside out for almost no reason. I guess it is technically contagious.