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Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices

Posted by twocents 
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 09, 2022
Moo is pissed because Duh wants to see their brat less often than every weekend. From what she says, he is manipulative and verbally, emotionally, mentally and physically abusive. WHY does she want to send her kid to his house every week if she knows these things about him?

I know, Duhs should pull their weight and pay for the brats they helped make, but why would you want your husband with a history of multiple kinds of abuse to be in charge of your child alone? Moo is probably willing to risk her kid's physical and mental well-being so she can have a break on the weekends.

I guarantee if she forces him into some kind of legal custody/visitation agreement to make him watch his own kid, he's going to start treating the kid like shit or neglecting her and sending her home an emotional wreck for Moo to deal with until Moo decides to amend the custody agreement. Because as we all know, parents just loooove using their sproggen as pawns to inconvenience or hurt the other parent when they are divorced/separated.

I'm sure my opinion doesn't matter because I'm not a Mawm and I don't understaaaaaaand, but I wouldn't want someone to watch my kid when they clearly don't want to because what are they gonna to do the poor kid when they take their resentment of the situation out on that child? Maybe he won't beat her, but I'll bet you anything he's going to poison the kid's mind against her Moo to try and fuck with Moo and make her life harder to teach her a lesson. And if the child is old enough, she'll figure out that her dad doesn't really want her around and that shit is gonna hurt.

Just keep the kid away from the toxic father. Anyone who was born to parents that later split and was ping-ponged between homes knows how much it sucks to find out your own father only lets you come over because he's being legally forced to allow it.

Not knocking the author for being split from her baby-daddy because hey, shit happens. But I do question her judgment when she wants to send her child to live with an abuser once a week. She is not acting in her kid's best interests.

https://old.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/wjgq0a/ex_wants_less_parenting_time/

Quote

Ex told me yesterday that he doesn't get any free time because he works 40 hour weeks and sees our 3.5yo every weekend (which is what he asked for). He is always extremely frustrated with her at the end of the weekend. I have kid Sunday night thru Saturday morning.. so he only has her Sat at 10am to Sun at 8pm. We do not have a legal custody agreement.

He gets every. single. day. to himself. He gets to get up and go to work without having to take care of a kid. He gets to come home and have hours to himself, doesn't have to deal with bedtime, and gets to sleep through the night. But he thinks I have it easier because I get weekends "off". In reality, I spend my weekends playing catch-up on errands, appointments, chores, etc. and soon will also have to fit in school assignments and studying.

A few months ago, he complained about paying $800 in child support because some of his buddies told him he pays too much. This guy makes 65k. I agreed to $700 to placate him until we go to mediation. Now he wants to see kid LESS. I am so, so sick of men being praised for bare-minimum parenting.

I'm having a meeting with him this week. I have to be very careful with my wording. He has a history of spinning everything I say and was extremely verbally/emotionally/mentally and occasionally physically abusive. What should I say to snap him back to reality? Or should I just let him have as little parenting time as he wants?
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 09, 2022
Again, there must be something wrong with me, I am a man and if I had screaming kids I would not want to have any weekends with them at all.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 09, 2022
Quote

Again, there must be something wrong with me, I am a man and if I had screaming kids I would not want to have any weekends with them at all.

I think many men are like this. Hell, from what you read on Breaking Mawm and a lot of places, I think a lot of people are like this. Not many of them want to be around their kids because kids are a pain in the ass.

The difference is, we didn't breed and then complain about it.

Giving the kid question serious consideration and opting not to have them and using birth control accordingly makes us smarter than 99% of humanity.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 09, 2022
Husband resents the fact he married me because I have a kid from a previous marriage
what the FUCK?!


So to give the background but generically since this is a throwaway account and I don't want anyone to put two and two together... I married my husband back in May. I have a 3yo from my previous marriage who is on the spectrum. She's a sweetheart but sometimes can be a lot. Husband has known about her and met her since the beginning of our relationship back when I was a single mom. They got along really well so I saw that as a sign it was good for us to proceed forward with the marriage. Now, how things go down in my house is that husband isn't really a step-dad in the traditional sense per se but more like fun cool uncle to my daughter. I do the parenting and disciplining and I cover her expenses. He, when he wishes to engage, does the fun play type stuff. We agreed before marriage that this is what we wanted the whole step-parent situation to look like. And that's what we've been doing.

However, recently husband has been extremely emotionally volatile with me and been stonewalling. I asked him what's been going on and what I'm doing to make him so upset. He eventually told me that our marriage is completely different from his expectations, that he was expecting for things to be just me and him and that we would have the flexibility to do things spontaneously like people without kids do and that he's resentful that we have to live in a bigger apartment with higher rent than a one bedroom because of my daughter and that he feels like he can't do anything fun for himself. I understand where he's coming from but also I'm really frustrated. I've told him many times that I support him taking time to travel or do outdoorsy stuff and taking care of himself and I help him with household expenses and rent. I also don't get it. Like if you didn't want to lose the flexibility and freedom of the child-free life then why the fuck did you get with a single mom and marry her? Not only that but I do use childcare so I try to schedule us time so we can be flexible and do things together but lately when I've scheduled that time he just ignores me and lashes out at me. I've asked him what I can do to make the situation better for him and he always says he doesn't know. I've asked him if he wants to divorce and he refuses. Part of me is suspicious that him not wanting to divorce is about citizenship stuff not because he actually wants a relationship with me (I am a citizen in the country we live, he is not and we just did paperwork to adjust his status). But at the same light, every compromise and every time I try to meet him half way, he rejects it. So what the fuck kind of relationship is that? I'm miserable and I don't want my daughter to grow up thinking that relationships are where one person ignores the other and their needs and the other frantically tries to appease them. So I'm considering leaving. But I wanted to ask fellow bromos here, is leaving the best course of action? Or do you think there's anything I can do to salvage this marriage? Help please.

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

No one is more arrogant towards women, more aggressive or scornful, than the man who is anxious (insecure..my word) about his virility. Simone de Beauvoir

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children. The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 09, 2022
and another full on display of utter moronic stupidity


Why can’t I care about anything anymore? I’m a shell of a person.
in crisis



I’m sorry this is likely to be long. I just really need help.

Here’s who I used to be: I worked in public diplomacy, wore fancy dresses and high heels, had a 50K instagram following for a food-related account and cooking blogs in two languages. I loved to entertain guests, had a bazillion baking pans and cooking utensils. I was working towards getting my PhD, but also read 40+ novels a year. My day started with reading the New Yorker and I listened to NPR on my way to the office. I won awards for my research papers. I was almost done writing a book. I wore silk and lace lingerie.

This person has been gone for about 2 years now. I don’t know if it’s the pandemic, the miscarriage after 7 years of infertility, the hormones of the subsequent rainbow pregnancy, but I’m just absolutely dead inside. I gained 90 pounds. Haven’t baked in about 2 years. Have only read a third of a novel since 2020, accumulated dozens of unopened magazines and let my subscription lapse. I can’t handle listening to even music, let alone podcasts. I’m green with envy when I hear colleagues talk about grants and conferences and yet I can’t make myself make any effort. My only two enjoyable things now are fancy skincare and my 6 mo girl. I buy her beautiful clothes, toys and books, we go to swimming classes and library events. So I’m not all the way checked out, but that’s not saying much.

The only thing that changed in my life is my baby and I absolutely adore her, so what gives? I was diagnosed bipolar a few years ago but I have been living with it since my early teens. I am medicated but while pills keep severe depressive episodes in check, they don’t take away the emptiness. I tried a few therapists but I feel weirdly patronized by them. I agree I should try and read at least half a page, I should at least walk to the gym, at least do something I might enjoy. But I can’t. All I do is eat crap, watch crap and feel like crap.

Is this youth going away? (I’m 33) Is this some new iteration of depression? Plain old burnout? I hate who I am now. Any ideas on what would be a first step?

SORRY ASSHOLE, YOU MISSED THE LAST EXIT AND NOW YOU ARE AT A PERMANENT DEAD END. AND YOU DID IT TO YOURSELF. AND NOW WE HAVE ANOTHER GENERATION OF A BATSHIT HUMAN

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

No one is more arrogant towards women, more aggressive or scornful, than the man who is anxious (insecure..my word) about his virility. Simone de Beauvoir

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children. The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 09, 2022
AND ONE FINAL ENTRY FOR THE DAY

at least this one is thinking of terminating but...


I’m pregnant and my husband didn’t come and find out. How fucked is everything? Vent



Sorry if this is all jumbled my mind is everywhere and I’m a mess…

I just found out I pregnant tonight. This isn’t a good thing. We don’t live in a “pro choice” state.

My husband was out all day drinking. I contacted him as soon as I found out saying. “I need you to come home ASAP I have something important to tell you…. I’m person”. I refused to tell him over text because it didn’t feel right letting him process it at a coworkers house like I need emotional support like now. I’ve been trying so hard to have a healthy non toxic relationship with him but admittedly… I flipped out a bit. He just kept asking what it was, guessed it even but I wouldn’t confirm and then he wouldn’t come back. He finally comes by… for his work badge…. Was just going to leave without even talking to me. Wtf?

I am tired of feeling like he doesn’t care like my needs aren’t important to him like I’m not a priority. I have been voicing these concerns for a while and I don’t know why I keep expecting things to get better over night. The electricity went out today…. I had no car… no phone… no way to contact him… no money. I had to wait like 6 hrs before the could use a neighbors phone to call the friend he was with because he wouldn’t pick up. Finally when the power comes back on no messages to even check in on me come through for like another hour.

Am I overreacting? Is this the hormones or am I justified?

I don’t know why it’s so difficult to have a supportive husband who cares about me needs.

This is his 3rd time out in a week where I stay at home every day. Idk I just need to vent but also I’m constantly checking my expectations because he’s constantly disappointed me.

I know I fucked up and turned the toxic on some but I’m just so fed up. In the end when I realized he wasn’t going to come talk to me tonight I told him to just forget I said anything. Don’t even bring it up again. My logic was since I’m not a priority to you then why should I act like you are to me? Toxic but im so broken.

I want our marriage to work di bad but I constantly feel like I try so hard to work on myself and try to change the way I approach things and just try to promote a healthy relationship then I slip back into old toxic ways but I feel like I just snap.

YEAH, I GUESS HE DID NOT FALL DOWN AND WORSHIP YOU .. SORRY BUT YOU PICKED IT, YOU HUMPED W/O BC (OR PERHAPS IT WAS SABOTAGED) AND THOUGHT 'NOW HE'LL PAY ATTENTION TO MEEEEE'... welcome to shitty moohood

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

No one is more arrogant towards women, more aggressive or scornful, than the man who is anxious (insecure..my word) about his virility. Simone de Beauvoir

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children. The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 09, 2022
#1 - he's in it for the green card and only married her for that. He thought he could live with the kid, but now the reality of that is making him resentful. (And Jeez, if this kid is only 3, how long did this Moo wait between relationships before she jumped into a marriage with this guy?)
Moo needs to split before he does or, worse yet, before he asks her to do a Susan Smith because the brat is not convenient.

#2: Many years ago, when shrinks actually talked to you and didn't just drug you, I had a shrink tell me to be very careful about depression and pregnancy. She explained, because I had depression, I needed to realize that pregnancy can greatly exacerbate depression. I doubt doctors are so honest today, but it makes sense. Wonky hormones can tank your mental health. It was yet another reason for me to be CF. (And as a postscript, it turns out my depression was caused by physical factors and chronic pain. Addressing those issues made it disappear. Going on thyroid medicine helped a lot.)

Some women are never the same after pregnasty, and this woman appears to be one of them.

#3: We know what she needs to do.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 10, 2022
I can absolutely see why the one lady is depressed and mentally/emotionally numb. She went from being what seems to be a very educated and confident individual with a fulfilling life to a plain old mommy. She says she finds enjoyment in her child, but I wonder if it's genuine joy or just feeling like she has to love her kid because it's her kid and also a successful birth following what sounds like a lot of infertility and pregnancy loss.

Being a Moo has a special way of sucking the life out of you and it's very easy for someone who is intelligent and educated to find the drudgery of Moohood absolutely fucking boring. I guarantee this woman is itching for mental stimulation, but being a parent leaves her too physically tired to pursue her old hobbies. It's not the end of youth - you can be middle aged or even a senior and still have an active mind. It probably is burnout - there's just not enough energy to deal with a brat and enjoy hobbies. Unfortunately, barring some tragic event like SIDS, she's stuck with this soul-sucking crotch maggot she made and may never regain her desire to do things she likes until after the kid is moved out.

Her history of bipolar disorder likely isn't doing her any favors (if there is any genetic component, her kid might develop it too), and like bell_flower said, it's very possible for a woman to simply never be the same again after giving birth. Pregnancy changes a woman physically and mentally, and not for the better in either case.

I feel somewhat bad for her, but SHE CHOSE TO BREED. It's not like she was at the height of her life and an unfortunate child was dropped into her lap by the stork. Her life pre-brat sounded awesome, so why did she choose to go and ruin it?
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 15, 2022
Quote
Cambion
Moo is pissed because Duh wants to see their brat less often than every weekend. From what she says, he is manipulative and verbally, emotionally, mentally and physically abusive. WHY does she want to send her kid to his house every week if she knows these things about him?

Because she had heard that if you separate/divorce the duh at least she'll have a certain amount of time away from the brats. Some people divorce solely so that each partner has time away from the brats. She was banking on this and now feels guilty for wanting to push the brats on the duh because he is all sorts of abusive.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 15, 2022
Quote
twocents
Husband resents the fact he married me because I have a kid from a previous marriage
what the FUCK?!

He definitely wants the green card above all else, so her instincts are correct. He endured the brat while dating to get to marriage. Based on his past behavior there isn't any reason to doubt he would inpig her and abandon her if it means a green card is provided. Depending on the country he may or may not have to pay brat support.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 15, 2022
For the moo who used to have a life that would be envied by most and threw it away to sluice:
A basic high school biology class would have taught her that a baybee is a parasite and the moo is the host. Sex is pleasurable
because it continues the human race and without a strong sex drive the human race would have died off a long time ago.
A moo is biologically dispensable once she procreates.

She isn't very perceptive. If she looked around at others, read books, watched movies from more than the last 10 years, etc. then she would have figured out really quickly being a moo is drudgery, plain and simple despite what social media tries to push. And if there were two earners in the house you can bet the duh is going to do everything in his power to be away from the house once the shit hits the fan. It isn't so much sexist as self-preservation. And men (because they carry exactly 0% of the physical breeding burden) get away with it for exactly this reason. If men carried 100% of the physical breeding burden you can bet women would do the exact same thing. Since they had issues sluicing it probably doesn't help that she likely was whining and belly aching about not being able to get inpig and may have offered to stay at home like a dumb bint. I wouldn't be surprised if she begged to stay at home.

Why is it always so shocking that moos gain a shit ton of weight, are exhausted, lose their desire to work/employment appeal, etc. by sluicing? If you adore your life, why change it?

Other that celebrities and the very rich (who can afford round the clock care for brats), name someone else whose life didn't change for the worse by having brats. I'll wait for her response.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 15, 2022
Quote
moo
I just found out I pregnant tonight. This isn’t a good thing. We don’t live in a “pro-choice” state.

This is followed by much admitted drama, hopefully she has made a trip to a pro-choice state to abort. If she thinks this drama is bad and puts her ostrich head in the sand and lets the sluice mature then it will become much worse when old day drinking duh has to deal with a brat. Think a three day a week drinker is likely to turn into a five or seven day a week drinker. Baybees don't improve coping skills. And the appearance of a baybee certainly won't help out in keeping utilities from being turned off.

Also, do they already have brats that may explain the duh's behavior? Or is duh just unable to cope, period?
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 16, 2022
Yeah I hate shopping enough as it is, this is a big steaming plate of NOPE with a side of NOPE for me.

At the very least, I'd call her an inefficient Moo. I think she should have wailed the kid's ass the first time she started misbehaving. The little asshole pulls this shit because it seems like there are no consequences for her bad behavior. If all Moo does is wrangle her without telling her off or spanking her, what reason does the brat have to stop this behavior?

Sounds like it's time for one of those toddler leashes if the brat can't be trusted to not run off, at least if Moo doesn't want her to become a road waffle. Though to be frank, after the performance the brat put on, I'd have been extremely tempted to just let her run free-range into the parking lot and see what Darwin had in store for her. But this is also why I'm not a parent.

Moo is asking for trouble by not correcting this behavior. Not everyone has the reflexes or attention span to stop in time for someone's unattented brat screeching through the parking lot. Old people don't react quickly behind the wheel, many people text while driving, other Moos in their urban tanks are too busy bitching at their own kids to look where they're going, people drive fast. Pulling the brat out of the path of a car by her hair may have saved her life, but that isn't a consequence of the kid's escape artist bullshit. Slapping her kid on the ass every single time she does this will hurt a lot less than getting run over and it's free, unlike planning the child's funeral.

https://old.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/wp94f4/toddler_just_had_her_first_screaming_tantrum_in/

Quote

I would like to say I was embarrassed but truly in the moment I didn't give a fuck. She just wanted to sit on the floor at the entrance and so I picked her up and put her in the cart to which she barrel rolled out of just as fast as she was put in and then she sprinted through the clothing racks.

I finally got her and her sister and carried them both to the car. I put the toddler down for 2 seconds to open the door and she sprinted away from me in the parking lot. Almost got hit by a car but I was able to grab her by the first thing my hand reached....which was her hair. Big shitty mom move on my part but I mean death by white sedan seems like the worse of the two options. Then I put her in the car just to get her in cause I can't buckle her while holding her sister. This girl is frantically trying to open her door.

But the child safety locks are on so what does she do? Jumps up front and escapes through the front door and runs through the parking lot. Guys. Am I just a shitty mom. Is she just a crazy ass toddler? Both? Neither. I'm at a loss.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 16, 2022
Dumb bitch relies on PCOS-induced infertility to keep her uterus empty and then is shocked when she gets herself knocked up, so she decides to keep it against her better judgment because she worries it might be her only chance to reproduce. Now she hates being a mommy and feels nothing toward her kid. She never even liked kids, but believed in the old It's Different When It's Your OwnTM chestnut, only to learn that it's not.

If you truly do not want to have a child or don't want to have one yet, do not rely on supposed infertility to keep you from conceiving. Women who are told they will never get pregnant go on to do just that all the time. The idiot just graduated college and had to turn down a job she wanted because it would not have meshed well with parenthood (lots of travel, on call 24/7/52). She even lost weight, then gained it all back and then some after staying pregnant, but now she's so mentally unstable that she becomes a suicidal hysterical mess for two days at a time if she sees a photo of herself because she got fat again (she also had an eating disorder she overcame, so I'm guessing that's why she's so nuts over weight).

She should have given the child up for adoption and lived her dream life. Yes the kid's got her needs met and is taken care of, but she's going to find out one day Mommy doesn't love her and never has and it's going to crush her.

Also, if children are so fucking wonderful, why are there so many Moos in the comments saying it took them months or even YEARS to bond with their kids after birth? I hate to compare loaves to cats because there is no comparison, but every time I have brought home a cat, I bonded with it immediately and never stopped. It didn't take me three years to come around to the idea of liking them. Some Moos describe taking years to bond with their own kids, and then they go and have more kids knowing they won't bond with them! I just... whut??

https://old.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/wp1k21/i_regret_choosing_to_be_a_mom/

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I found out I was pregnant, the week I was graduating college, finally walking the stage, had my dream job secured, would have been financially secure in a big way. I finally reached my dreams, that I worked so hard for, invested countless hours to, and money.

I was told I could never have kids. Like most people in my family. No one has had a child, since me. So over 20 years. I was sexually active without birth control for over a decade. Maybe I’m an idiot, but I had no reason to believe I could reproduce. I did want a child eventually, but I wanted to be very financially stable. When I got pregnant, I couldn’t believe it. In my head this was my only chance and I wanted and needed to have my baby. I have a very supportive partner, who desperately wanted a child.

I had to turn down my dream job because it was going to be a 365 on call, travel heavy position. Which I was happy with due to the compensation and I had interned the position and knew I loved it.

Now my daughter is almost a year old, and every part of this has been a nightmare. My pregnancy was hell. I had just before getting pregnant lost over 50lbs and was down to my dream weight. I did it in a healthy way, and I’ve struggled with bullimia since I was 10. So to say I felt joy in this would be an understatement. I was finally happy in my own body, and I had never felt that.

I gained 80lbs in my pregnancy and it was devastating; due to having pcos losing the weight is a slow and hard process. Also since it took so long to get where I wanted before I feel hopeless

And that is the smallest of my issues.

I’ve never liked children. I thought when I had my own child that would change. It didn’t. I hate myself. I try so hard to bond and get better, it’s been such a failure so far and I have no idea what to do.

I work a shitty retail job. We are in $43,000 of debt. I will never be able to give her life she deserves and she shouldn’t have to deal with that. It’s not fair to her.

She’s a wonderful baby. Well behaved, cute, very attached to me. But my emotions refuse to bond.

Let me be very clear. She is taken care of. I give her baths, feed her the healthiest food, play with her, take her on fun outings, have made her the cutest coziest room, I read to her, I sing to her, I check her diaper constantly, I always am watching her to make sure she’s safe.

But it’s all a chore. I get no joy out of any part of it. I do it because it’s essential and because I desperately want to be a good mom. But I dread every day of my life. I’ve been to therapist, I’m on antidepressants which have helped me get through my days. Nothing is helping me bond. I have ruined my life and now I have a beautiful child who has been stuck with a mom that dreads being a mom. Im a failure. As a mom, I’ve lost my career, thus not being able to provide like I was in my childhood, I’ve lost every friend. Im guilty, I’m miserable and it’s my fault. I’d do anything to change but I’m out of options I think. I know I’m a piece of garbage. So anyone that wants to remind me, you don’t need to. Im fully aware.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 17, 2022
I cannot understand women like that. I myself had PCOS and endometriosis which was medically verified. I had a doctor look at my insides and remark that the likelihood of my getting pregnant was less than 1%. (Not that I asked, mind you.) I still used birth control religiously and I also had a tubal ligation to burn what was left of my tubes.

Why wasn't this woman using birth control if she hated kids? Why was she with a guy who "desperately wanted children?" Okay, maybe he was a Mr. Right for now, but any guy who desperately wanted kids was an instant libido killer to me. Staying with a guy like that and not using BC are a recipe for disaster. You know what's going to happen if you get knocked up by a guy like this, right? If he finds out you are pregnant, things are going to be unpleasant at best or if you abort you could wind up DEAD. Or 99% of the time the woman just lets herself get talked into keeping a pregnancy she doesn't want. It appears she is still with the guy, but of course she's not writing that HE'S ensuring the loaf has healthy food and taking the loaf on outings.

And most of all, why didn't she abort? Abortions can still be had.

When I was nine, I could comprehend that having a baby affects the woman's body and only the woman's body. I left many a relationship over the kid issue. I broke up with a fiance who started going back on what we agreed to the minute the ring was on my finger. I dumped a husband who wanted my tubalized self to produce a baybee. No regrets.

I just don't understand not believing you have the right to live the life you want. Particularly when it's YOUR body that will be affected. I remember being so disgusted in my 20's by all these people who told me I must have a baybee. Where are these baby pushers when it comes to taking care of the chyld? Evaporated into thin air with THE WOMAN holding the bag. No thanks.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 17, 2022
If she had a “supportive partner who desperately wanted children,” why did she have to give up the dream job to play mommy? She says the job would have made them “financially secure in a big way,” so why couldn’t the man who was supportive and desperately wanted the child be the one to stay home and parent while she went out and brought home the $$$?

_____________________________________________________________________________________________
"Not every ejaculation deserves a name" - George Carlin
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 18, 2022
because, love, both sexes lie through their teeth to get what they want sexually. and this bimbo fell for it. it is all talk, and unfortunately they won't find out until they drop the calf

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

No one is more arrogant towards women, more aggressive or scornful, than the man who is anxious (insecure..my word) about his virility. Simone de Beauvoir

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children. The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 18, 2022
I think a lot of these cases are regret as retroactive CFdom. They paint a picture where they never wanted kids, had great opportunities ahead, but still end up pregnant by someone who wanted a baybee. I have a really hard time believing they weren't "let's see what happens if I go off my BC/don't use BC" because I think a lot of them did want to trap a man/become pregnant. It's only now with the bitch n' backpedal that they are creating these pasts full of success and glamor. I just don't buy it!
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 18, 2022
Quote
Cambion
Sounds like it's time for one of those toddler leashes if the brat can't be trusted to not run off, at least if Moo doesn't want her to become a road waffle. Though to be frank, after the performance the brat put on, I'd have been extremely tempted to just let her run free-range into the parking lot and see what Darwin had in store for her. But this is also why I'm not a parent.

There is a comment to this from a parunt who tried the leash
Quote
leash fail
:
When my kiddo was a toddler, I tried a leash. Kiddo chewed through the leash!

beating with a lol hammer
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 19, 2022
I don't get it either. Biology is not destiny - there is nothing and no one forcing you to have a child you don't want, especially when this woman was still pregnant because it was before Roe v. Wade was overturned. Frankly, I think with her history of bulimia, that alone should have been reason enough to abort because it's not like you can stay slim while pregnant if you just do it right. No, you WILL get fat and you WILL stay fat until you give birth and you WILL struggle to lose the weight. That seems like the kind of trigger that would be very unhealthy physically and mentally for someone with a history of eating disorders. Though I imagine morning sickness felt like old times for her. Weight gain paired with pignasty and PCOS means I would not be surprised if this woman had to go back to being bulimic to lose anything.

I also would love to know why she decided to stay with a man who was a full-blown wanna-breeder when she herself didn't like kids and didn't seem too keen on having them in a hurry either. Did she see a compatible future with this person? I don't know how. But when you're Young and In WuvTM, logic tends to go right the fuck out the window.

It's not like you can have half a kid. Or was she hoping for a mind change like when breeders get with CFers and figure they'll come to the dark side if the breeder is just patient? Sorry honey, it doesn't work in the other direction either.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 19, 2022
Quote
freya
Quote
Cambion
Sounds like it's time for one of those toddler leashes if the brat can't be trusted to not run off, at least if Moo doesn't want her to become a road waffle. Though to be frank, after the performance the brat put on, I'd have been extremely tempted to just let her run free-range into the parking lot and see what Darwin had in store for her. But this is also why I'm not a parent.

There is a comment to this from a parunt who tried the leash
Quote
leash fail
:
When my kiddo was a toddler, I tried a leash. Kiddo chewed through the leash!

beating with a lol hammer

That's an easy fix! Soak the leash in the absolute hottest fucking hot sauce you can find and let it dry. Apply in layers to ensure proper marination. If the little shit stain is going to gnaw through his restraints, make it painful! I guarantee one mouthful of some Carolina Reaper sauce will stop that crap in a hot minute.

I should write a parenting book. tongue sticking out smiley
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 19, 2022
i think at times i'd be tempted just to let the turd run off and screw what happens

two cents ¢¢

CERTIFIED HOSEHEAD!!!

No one is more arrogant towards women, more aggressive or scornful, than the man who is anxious (insecure..my word) about his virility. Simone de Beauvoir

people (especially women) do not give ONE DAMN about what they inflict on children and I defy anyone to prove me wrong

Dysfunctional relationships almost always have a child. The more dysfunctional, the more children. The selfish wants of adults outweigh the needs of the child.

Some mistakes cannot be fixed, but some mistakes can be 'fixed'.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. Leo J. Burke

Adoption agencies have strict criteria (usually). Breeders, whose combined IQ's would barely hit triple digits, have none.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 19, 2022
Quote

Soak the leash in the absolute hottest fucking hot sauce you can find and let it dry. Apply in layers to ensure proper marination. If the little shit stain is going to gnaw through his restraints, make it painful! I guarantee one mouthful of some Carolina Reaper sauce will stop that crap in a hot minute.

Or use Bitter Apple. Easier to apply, no chance of burning yourself, same result.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 23, 2022
Found another gem from the I-regret-having-children FB page. This one is a Geezer Breeder to boot.

She willingly did this to herself and now all she can do is bitch. Why do these dumbass bints who want to be single mothers think it's all going to be sunshine and roses with no partner?

Breeders are never satisfied, part 34,758:

Oh, and I bet ALL her children are normal kids, but she's scapegoating two of them and making one of them, who happens to be a boy, the golden child. And she doesn't want them to be traumatized when she's shrieking at them all the time that she regrets they were born?

What a reprehensible human. :

Quote

“I am an older, single mother who knowingly had her children using an anonymous donor.

I went through so much to get pregnant— daily injections, pills, appointments, more timed injections. Perhaps that’s where the irony lies.
My children, now 13 and 11-year-old twins, are simultaneously the people I love most in the world but also the ones I regret the most. I have lost my identity, as is often shared on these posts. I feel deflated, defeated, unappreciated, and worthless.

Two of my three children are extremely difficult. They have no regard for how hard I work or respect for our home. I have finally identified the feeling I have been having when my kids don’t listen to my requests to clean up after themselves or help around the house or to stop fighting amongst themselves. I feel voiceless and powerless, and so devalued.

There was never a sense that children were my greatest achievement or greatest satisfaction. I love them so much, but motherhood has done little more than make me feel the deepest regret I have ever experienced. I’ve morphed into someone constantly angry, cold, disheartened, and disconnected.
One of my twins is spectacular; I adore him, and he’s old enough to piece together that I regret becoming a mother… probably because I’ve shouted it countless times when I’m frustrated and angry with them. I love all three of my children, but I don’t like two of them.

I often think how wonderful life would be if I had just had my one twin. His personality is so gentle and mild, and I feel genuine sadness for him that he gets lost in all the chaos and regret. I often think how wonderful his life would be if I had had only him— all the attention I could have given him. All the time we could have spent traveling and enjoying life.

My children didn’t ask to be brought into the world. I did this. I’m acutely aware that I am potentially damaging them, and shame on me. That’s the last thing I want— for them to carry the traumatic, emotional baggage of my wrong choice. That’s not fair to them.
Re: Breakingmom Tales: Or A Collection of Stupidity & Dumb Choices
August 24, 2022
Quote
bell_flower
Found another gem from the I-regret-having-children FB page. This one is a Geezer Breeder to boot.

She willingly did this to herself and now all she can do is bitch. Why do these dumbass bints who want to be single mothers think it's all going to be sunshine and roses with no partner?

Breeders are never satisfied, part 34,758:

Oh, and I bet ALL her children are normal kids, but she's scapegoating two of them and making one of them, who happens to be a boy, the golden child. And she doesn't want them to be traumatized when she's shrieking at them all the time that she regrets they were born?

What a reprehensible human. :

So few recognize the regret after one brat...regretful ones seem to be excruciatingly slow learners. They're the ones in class that needed the constant repetition and still looked lost. By the time reality catches up to them they often have 3+ brats. I'd understand if the first inpig was twins but this isn't the case for her.

And these regretful ones love their brats but hate parunting. There is a very simple solution for this, find brats of a friend or relative that you can interact with for a specified amount of time: few hours a few days a month and leave it at that. No one is harmed, everyone benefits and the parents get a break! It is perfectly fine to want to be around brats/be part of the village (as long as it what they want) and not be parunts. Parunts always whine about the lack of a village. This will require normalizing adults that want to be in village and parunts not shaming these adults because they choose not to parunt and parunts appreciating their help. I realize parunts don't feel appreciated but it is a base expectation of being a parunt that they do everything for the brats. If they want to feel appreciated (or to have regular time off) and spend some time around brats then encourage them to participate in the village.

Guessing they're telling themselves they love their brats and white knuckling it on daily basis to keep from running out the door and abandoning the brats. And don't even get me started on the breeders who have a brat with severe challenges and end up doing it again and being so discouraged to have another one with severe challenges. At a certain point it starts to resemble self-imposed masochism.

I've had a very strong urge to explore since I was a toddler. I've done it until I've dropped with exhaustion numerous times. Urges can be very strong but as an adult exercise discernment about it: Can I explore all day and night? In theory it sounds appealing but is not practical because I need to eat, sleep and earn a living. Perhaps limiting exploring to some weekend/evening time might make sense so that it doesn't interfere with work and life might work? Makes sense.

People who have a strong urge to procreate: Is it a sexual urge or an urge to make baybeez? Can one make baybeez day and night? In theory it might sound appealing but it isn't practical because they are very expensive, huge resource suckers and a person needs to eat, sleep and work to support them. Also there is the problem of a lack of any free time and adequate sleep with just one baybee, let alone more than one baybee. Perhaps limiting baybee exposure to working in a daycare would provide the above? Makes sense.
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